"I'm not gonna' play that one, Kyle."
"Come on, Stan! It's just a request! It doesn't reflect your personal taste in music at ALL." Kyle beamed at Stan. who at the moment was close to growling.
"Kyle, I can't. It's against my religion. I would go to hell, Kyle. I would go to hell."
"And I'd walk through hell for you." Kyle quoted a Say Anything song, one of Stan's favorite bands in an attempt to pacify him.
Stan sighed. "Why do I keep listening to you? Why?" Stan complained as he got out The Jonas Brothers CD.
The song? "Lovebug".
Stan made a variety of whining noises as the song came on.
"It's okay, Stan. It's okay." Kyle encouragingly patted Stan on the back. "We'll get through this."
"If I don't make it, Kyle. Tell Cartman I was the one who ate his cookie back in 5th grade."
"YOU WERE THE ONE WHO ATE HIS COOKIE?" Kyle had suddenly become enraged. He pushed Stan slightly away from him in shock. But never too far away. He could never push Stan too far away.
"DUDE HE'S BEEN PINNING THAT ON ME FOR YEARS."
Stan smirked. "Yeah. Cartman doesn't like you. If it makes you feel any better, it's not because of the cookie."
Kyle sulked. "Thanks, Captain obvious. You think it's cause of my hair?"
Stan frowned. "That's impossible. Your hair is awesome." Stan reached over and entangled his fingers in Kyle's maroon Afro.
"Stop that." Kyle swatted Stan's fingers away. No matter how much he liked it, he couldn't be distracted from his job.
"And that was "Lovebug" by The Jonas Brothers dedicated to Anne Garrett from Steve Pent! He's burnin' up, burnin' up for you baby!" Kyle whistled once then put on "Insomnia" by Craig David.
Stan turned off Kyle's mic. "Wait. I don't get it."
Kyle rolled his eyes. Stan was cute, but sometimes he was completely helpless. "You don't listen to the Jo Bros too much do you?"
"Jo Bros? Kyle, who are you talking about? I was talking about The Jonas Brothers."
It was times like this Kyle was sure he was in love with Stan Marsh.
"Kyle, you okay? You're just staring at me." Stan poked Kyle's shoulder then turned back to the radio desk and sorted through more requests and CD's.
"Sorry. I zoned." Kyle shook his head, trying to clear all his thoughts of Stan out. They were screwing with his concentration.
"Who is she?" Stan winked. "Come on, you never tell me anything."
"Alright you caught me. It's Kenny. Sorry I couldn't keep it a secret anymore." Kyle sighed longingly. "He's so delicious."
Something vicious flashed in Stan's eyes. But it was only there for a second, and to replace it was their usual innocent gleam.
"Kenny's a ho. Play it safe, Broflovski."
The radio room's office phone rang. Kyle was closer, so he picked it up.
"Hello?"
"Turn on the TV, Kyle." Cartman's voice was raspy and crooked. "Now."
Kyle placed the phone down besides its stand and turned the TV on in the radio room. He waited for the static to clear. There was a man in a gray suit, sitting behind an over-sized mahogany desk.
"Good afternoon, South Park High! This is your vice principal, Dr. Webb here to welcome you to S-Park News! The completely student run news show! Our anchors are Wendy Testaburger."
The screen cut to Wendy happily smiling, spinning in her chair once and pointing at the camera.
"I'm Wendy T and I'm here to bring the news to YOU!"
Kyle had to restrain himself from barfing.
"Eric Cartman."
The screen cut to Cartman, sipping coffee and holding the cup up in front of the camera.
"I'm Eric C. South Park High, there's nothing like it."
The vice principal chuckled. He had also acquired a pair of square glasses somewhere between Wendy and Cartman's introductions. "Last but not least, our very own radio stars-"
No. Kyle's heart sunk. Goddammit no.
"Kyle Broflovski and Stan Marsh!"
A picture of Stan and Kyle from one of their radio show promos came up on the screen.
The picture was in black & white. Stan sat on top of the desk in the radio room with a CD halfway in his mouth and stuck in a shoulder shrug. He was wearing a blue tuxedo. Kyle had put the mics around his shoes and was performing a handstand on the floor. He was wearing short shorts and a "Cash Cash" band hoodie. The caption read "South Park High Radio: We know what we're doing."
The vice principal laughed again as the picture faded back to him at the mahogany desk. This time he was wearing a new beige baseball cap.
"So get ready South Park High! Broadcasting starts this Monday!"
The screen finally faded to black while credits rolled by with all the A/V kids names. The ending song was "Welcome To The World" by Kevin Rudolf.
"Huh. I guess Cartman wasn't lying." Was all Stan said when the show was over. "I guess we're done here, Kyle." Stan's tone was pretty accepting. "I wonder where the TV room is...."
Kyle quietly turned the TV off. He turned around to look at Stan and really look at Stan. Something in Kyle was a little off kilter. No more spending his afternoons with Stan in a cramped little radio room, hidden within the main office. No more side conversations when the mics were cut off. No more staring at Stan when he was too distracted.
"Stan do you really wanna' do this?"
Stan paused for a moment and looked back at Kyle. He grinned. "Do you not want to do this?"
Kyle grinned back, knowing his grin was bullshit.
"Let's do this. But....one last song okay?"
Stan nodded. "Okay".
Kyle walked over to a stack of CD's and searched until he found the right one.
Kyle signaled to Stan to cut his mic back on for him. "South Park High, this is Kyle B. and if you haven't heard the news, South Park Radio is over. Kyle and Stan got PROMOTED. WHOOOO." Kyle screamed into the mic. "And this is our final song for all you lovers out there, for anyone really who's still listening to this. Which you shouldn't be. Still listening to this."
Kyle turned his mic off and slapped Stan on the back.
"Are you still coming over tomorrow, Stan M.?" Kyle said mocking the South Park News anchors habit of keeping their last name as an initial.
"Sure am, Kyle B.!" Stan chortled. "Man. To think. This is our last Friday as....radio people. We're gonna' be on TV, Kyle. TV! In two days!"
Kyle smiled at Stan's excitement as the song Kyle had chosen reached its chorus in the background of their conversation.
"We had it all in front of us. You were the one I was in love. You were everything that's bad for me, make no apologies. I'm crushed, black and blue but you'd know I'd do it all again for you."
Stan scoffed. "Way to play an emo song on your last day, Kyle."
You have no idea. Kyle kept his first reply to Stan in his head.
"Whatever. I swear to God, if Cartman does anything to piss me off I'm out." Kyle answered Stan out loud this time.
"And if you're out, I'm out." Stan's voice came from behind stacks of CD's he'd just put out.
Suddenly, the part of Kyle that had become a little off kilter fit just right.
