Part Two is here! Thanks for sticking around!

(*)

The first time she noticed him, he was sleeping at the back of class, an enraged Iruka-sensei bellowing about how the young boy should be 'paying more attention'.

At first, Sakura had frowned at the boy's behavior. So not cool. At least her Sasuke-kun was amazing, cool, smart, and handsome. That little boy in the back with the spiky hair was not Sasuke-kun.

But when Iruka-sensei had asked him a question to teach the little boy a lesson about sleeping in class, he was able to answer. Sakura's eyebrows rose high on her forehead; she was very sure that Iruka-sensei had not taught that lesson yet. As Iruka-sensei begrudgingly walked back to the front of his class, muttering something about 'smart-asses', Sakura stole a look at the spiky-haired boy again.

Maybe he wasn't so bad.

(*)

The first time he talked to her, she was still a student of the Academy, and was crying her eyes out over Sasuke.

He didn't even say 'No' nicely, Sakura thought to herself, wiping away her tears. He had called her annoying, gave her that usual, cold, unassuming look, and sauntered off by his lonesome. She sniffled loudly. She had even gone through the trouble of asking her mother to cook at least two more portions of the food she usually ate. Her mother had smiled, and asked her if she and Ino were becoming friends again. Sakura had just smiled.

She looked up at the sky, seeing how beautiful it was. Little Sakura really did like rooftops. It was so quiet, and peaceful... "Oy. Haruno-san."

She flinched, and looked around to see who was talking to her. She was surprised to see Nara Shikamaru staring at her, an inquisitive (and yet for some reason, lazy) look on his face. "Na-Nara-san!"

The next twenty minutes or so went by in a blur for Sakura. It was the first time she had talked normally with another person in a long time. It was the first time someone hadn't felt the need to point out her large forehead. It was a nice, honest talk, and even at the young age of seven, she could understand how special it was.

He was actually listening to her, and it felt wonderful.

(*)

The first time she depended on him for anything was during the entirety of the Sasuke retrieval mission. The first one, anyway.

She was so sure that if her heartache was an actual, physical wound, she would be bleeding out all over the streets. Sasuke had not only broken her heart - he had stomped over it, demolished it, and scattered the pieces in the wind. Sakura desperately wanted to go with the team assigned to bring him back. But she knew that she couldn't. He had knocked her out with a tap on the neck. How could she deal with S-Rank criminals?

Sakura stood in front of her friends - the ones who were given the near impossible mission to bring her Sasuke back. Kiba; she worried for him and his impulsiveness. Chouji; was he really going to be all right? Neji; did he care for the now missing ninja at all? Naruto; would he be able to reign in enough strength? Shikamaru; would he be able to analyze each situation carefully, and above all, keep each of them safe? "Shikamaru..." her voice cracked, and she felt a few more tears threatening to spill from her eyes. "Please."

Keep them safe. Bring him home.

(*)

The first time she was angry at him, he wasn't there.

As she burst into tears, sitting on the grass where she and her teammates used to trade punches and insults, she cried at the unfairness of it all. She was happy her friends had returned, terribly injured, yes, but safe - but they were missing a person on their team.

She had trusted them to heal her heart, trusted them to bring him back. But they didn't, and it was so unfair. Would it have changed if she had followed them? Would it have changed if the team were of Kakashi-sensei's calibre? Would it have changed if Shikamaru had thought out something else, a different plan?

She feels a sudden burst at anger towards Shikamaru.

They failed because of him. They didn't bring him back because of him. Sakura feels even more hot tears spill down her cheeks, but she doesn't wipe them away. If only Tsunade-sama had assigned someone else to lead the mission. If only the other ninja hadn't been on other missions. If only he had assembled a better team.

If, if, if.

(*)

The first time he made her laugh, she was upset over a fish.

She had long gotten over the disappointment of losing Sasuke. She's forgiven Shikamaru (and the others) inside her head, and has a newfound resolve inside of her. She'll train, and become stronger. She'll work herself down to the bone, and become the kunoichi she always dreamed of being. Maybe next time, she'll be able to go on the mission. Maybe next time, Sasuke will come back with them.

But Sakura is felt anything but optimistic today. Tsunade's stinging words rang in her ear, as she failed, yet again, to revive a fish. Everyone was right - she was easily the weakest link on her team. Even Naruto was getting stronger, and it was obvious that even Sasuke had gone to his own lengths to increase his strength. And yet, here she was, unable to heal a fish. How could she ever be expected to heal a person?

A crisp, cool voice cut through her thoughts, and she stopped running. Shikamaru stared at her with his no-nonsense look, and practically demanded that she sit. What was she, a dog? It was strange, though. For some reason, she felt comfortable talking to him. It was easy for her to confide in him her insecurities, her fears and worries. He didn't laugh at her, give her false reassurance, or needlessly raise up her hope.

Shikamaru made a comment about hitting Tsunade over the head with a fish, and Sakura couldn't help but giggle. It was the first time in a long time that she had genuinely laughed about anything, and it felt wonderful.

She walked away from him, feeling a hundred times better.

(*)

The first time she started feeling differently about him, was one of the worst days of her life.

She was numb. Emotionless. In shock. Broken, all over again. She had tried so hard to keep it in throughout the whole time, and had only barely succeeded. Naruto was being annoying, Sai was his usual self, and Yamato was also being very overbearing. She needed time away from them, and so she found herself in a place she knew calmed people down.

Hell, this hill was probably what caused Shikamaru's laziness.

Sakura felt him approaching her, and she closed her eyes, a tear squeezing out. Did she really expect him to leave her alone? She wondered why she was even here, anyway. She could easily be at home, crying alone. She could be anywhere but here, lying on Shikamaru's hill, staring up at the stars.

They didn't speak as much as they usually did, but he stayed with her, and that's what mattered to Sakura. It struck her then; he always knew what to say to her. When they were seven, when he returned, when she was crying over a fish... Even now, he knew that by just being there, he was helping her. Sakura felt strange, the thoughts in her mind clicking together like a puzzle.

How had she not realized that he was always there for her?

(*)

The first person who knew of her conflicting feelings was Ino.

"Of course he has the hots for you, Forehead. How did you not realize that?"

Sakura watched Ino casually place some hydrangeas into a vase. Her face burned; either with shame or pleasure, she had no idea. "I might have been a bit preoccupied, if you haven't noticed."

Ino rolled her eyes. "Of course. Preoccupied."

"It's true, Pig!" Sakura burst out. "How does anyone have enough time to think of anyone's... Advances when your heart is continuously bleeding out?" She frowned, and plucked a daisy from a nearby display shelf. "He loves me, he loves me not. He loves me, he loves me not."

"You know you're going to have to pay for that?" The blonde teased. "And all for what, a juvenile attempt to confirm someone's feelings for you?" Sakura continued to pluck petals while Ino sighed. "It was cute when we were like, six, Forehead. Now that we're sixteen, this is just sad."

Sakura stuck her tongue out at Ino. "He loves me not. He loves me..." She stared at the last petal, her eyes popped open. "Pig, he loves me."

Ino smirked, and plucked a daisy of her own from the same shelf. "She loves him. She loves him not. She loves him."

"Ino what-what-what are you doing?" Sakura spluttered, still holding on to the remains of her flower.

"Since you decided that you would decide if he had feelings for you through a flower, I thought I'd do the same to you." Ino shrugged, a playful smirk on her lips. "She loves him, she loves him not. She loves him, she loves him not. She loves him!" Ino mock-squealed, holding the bare daisy up in the air triumphantly. "I knew it!"

"Shut up!" Sakura yelled, blushing even harder. "Kami, Ino-pig!" The pinkette dropped into a chair, staring blankly at the wall. "I don't even know if I love him. I'm in love with Sasuke, remember? You know, despite everything?"

Ino said nothing, and instead, stared pensively at Sakura. She knew her best friend, and Sakura did not like listening to other people telling her what to do, or how to feel. She would continue to talk until she came to her conclusion. It was weird, but it was Sakura.

"But I've been concentrating my feelings on someone else for so long that I... I don't think I let anyone in romantically, you know?" Sakura continued, staring morosely at the daisy. "I just continued moping, and training, but I completely forgot that someone was just... There." Sakura felt a wave of confusion, and she buried her face in her hands. "Hell, he's been there for me whenever Sasuke-kun let me down for anything. Ever since the Academy! And I was so mad at him the first time they tried to bring him back, you know?"

Ino continued to clean up the shop while Sakura talked to herself. "Keep going, Forehead." This must be very therapeutic for her, Ino thought.

"But Pig, he's just... He's just always been there, and I can't... I can't believe I've been so blind."

Ino sighed, and went over to her best friend. "Oh, Sakura. You're not blind, you're just... You were far-sighted, okay? Always looking at something else, something farther. It's nothing to be ashamed of. Not everyone has 20/20 vision, you know?"

Sakura nodded, and buried her head in her hands. Now what was she going to do?

(*)

The first time she returned the favor was a hard time for both of them.

She had just lost a patient. Sakura hated it when she lost a patient, especially when it was mainly her fault. Of course, she had heard Tsunade's litany probably about a hundred times - We are not responsible for any deaths, except when we failed to do our best, or we did something wrong. Sakura gave her all for any patient, and the latest one was no exception.

But whenever she lost patients, Sakura couldn't help but feel that same inadequacy and helplessness she used to feel before. She sunk back into the little girl who could do nothing but cry while other people did all the work.

And so, she found herself sitting on the hospital roof, wishing (not for the first time) that she had a cigarette. It wasn't that she spoke - no, she hated smoking, knowing what it did to your lungs. She just thought it would be nice to have at least some kind of bad habit, something she could sink into whenever she felt bad.

"You've got that look on your face."

Sakura didn't turn around; she knew who it was, anyway. "And what look is that, Shikamaru?"

His footsteps continued until he was standing next to her. "You know. That look. The 'I'm useless' look?"

She made a face. "Am I really that transparent?"

Shikamaru shook his head. "I heard you were the head medic who was in charge of Kenta-san. Thought you might be feeling a bit down, after... You know."

Her ears pricked up at the name of her lost patient, and she looked up at him. "Did you know him?"

It took Shikamaru a while to answer. "I guess you could say I did... I was on the same mission he was on when he got injured."

Her eyes widened, and she felt his calculating gaze on her. What happened to Kenta-san today could have easily happened to Shikamaru. "I'm so sorry," she blurted out, but he was already shaking his head.

"Don't be. It's a mission. These things happen."

She wanted to argue with him, tell him that they can be avoided if one is competent and careful enough. But before she could, she looked at him, and was suddenly aware of the blank look on his face. Of course, the pinkette thought, dismayed. He was the leader on that mission, so he's blaming himself too. Thankful that she had just avoided an awkward moment between them, she spoke up. "It's not your fault, Shikamaru."

"Isn't it, though?" he drawled. "Do you know what happened?"

Sakura frowned. "I know you were ambushed. How can anyone blame you for-"

"I led them into that trap. I should have known the enemy wasn't done with us yet. I should have taken another route home, the longer one. But I just wanted us home, and..." He sighed again, and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Now I have to tell Kenta-san's pregnant wife that he won't be coming home."

There was a long silence between the two of them. He continued standing, while she sat cross-legged on the ground. Aren't we a piece of work, Sakura thought to herself. It was hard to tell who was more troubled between the two of them, but she also knew who would be under the most heat for the next week.

And she knew exactly what to say. The words he spoke to her not so long ago when she lost another patient rang in her ears. "A friend once told me not to beat myself up over things that aren't under my control."

He smiled wryly. "That friend of yours should earn a medal."

She stood up, and without thinking if what she was going to do was the rational thing to do, wrapped her arms around him. She rested her chin on his shoulder, and ignored (tried to ignore) the quickening of her heartbeat. "You did everything you could, Shikamaru. I know you, and I know you did your best."

If she had just turned her head a little to look at him, she would have seen the first blush anyone had ever seen on Shikamaru. But she couldn't, of course.

Not when she was fighting back a blush of her own.

(*)

The first time she cried for him, she nearly lost him.

"Don't leave me, Shikamaru," she choked out, as she pressed her hands to her chest. Stop crying. Stop crying! A medic is not allowed to cry or show her emotions for anyone, for any reason! Just stop crying for his sake!

He mumbled something indecipherable, and she wished, more than anything, that her chakra would be enough to save him. "Come on, Shikamaru," she whispered. "Don't leave me like he did." This time, she couldn't help it - a few drops of tears spilled from her eyes, landing on his cheek.

Don't leave me like he did, she thought desperately, as she poured her chakra into him. Don't leave me just when I realized that you were always there for me, not when I've just noticed how much I feel your absence when you're away. She stifled a sob, and if anything, it fuelled her to concentrate even harder.

She felt a bit of movement, and saw him try to raise his arm, only to fail horribly, a pained expression on his face. "Don't- Don't do anything," she scolded him, not able to help herself. "Don't waste your energy on... Save your strength for when you really need it!"

She watched, incredulous, as he gave her the softest, gentlest expression she had ever seen on him.

Whatever he was thinking, she wanted to know. She wanted to hear his voice.

Don't die on me, Shikamaru. Live for me. Please.

(*)

A couple of weeks after the war ended, Sakura reclined on a chair in her new office. It was a small gift from her shishou, after Tsunade had realized she wanted Sakura to head the hospital after the war.

She had never been so glad to stop fighting.

The war still left behind a lot of pain, and Sakura couldn't help but be resentful towards Tsunade for leaving her to pick up the broken pieces. Yes, she knew that Tsunade had nearly died trying to save everyone, but she had, too. It was selfish of her, but Sakura didn't care - she was feeling particularly cranky these days. There were mountains of medical reports and death certificates to be filed, a vast number of new interns to train supervise, and a re-stocking of supplies that needed to be requested. All of this needed to be done as soon as possible.

As for her personal life, she had no idea where to start. Her parents were worried sick about her, and didn't want her to work so soon after exerting so much effort to save the world. Naruto was being thick as usual, sneaking out of the hospital to help rebuild Konoha (as much as he could with one arm, anyway), but at least he was helping. Kakashi-sensei was slowly being roped into being Tsunade's successor, and Sakura could tell that he was going to be a great Hokage. A lazy one, but still a great Hokage. Sasuke was somewhere in this hospital, groaning about his missing arm, while she tried to sort out her feelings (or lack of them) for him... While trying to sedate him long enough so that he wouldn't be performing his own escapes.

She hadn't seen Shikamaru in weeks.

Sakura would be lying if she said she didn't feel a bit hurt. She knew he wasn't in this hospital, since she held all the records. She knew he wasn't on a mission, since most of the high-ranking shinobi were still being debriefed and interrogated for proper documentation of the war.

Really; she had spent a fourth of her chakra alone trying to save him. She hadn't heard a peep from him since then, only glimpses at the memorial. She would have expected at least a thank you... Or the chance to express her feelings. She'd never get the hang of this. She would die an old maid. That was something to look forward to.

Sakura sighed, and started walking over to a pile of folders on a side table, when she heard a knock on her door. "Come in," she said, not bothering to look up from the folders. Look at all the work I have to distract myself with.

"Is this a bad time?"

Her eyes widened, and she looked up, to see Shikamaru in her doorway. He had a look on his face that she knew so well - it was the look he had on his face when he was trying to figure her out, or assess the mood she was in. "Shikamaru." She stared at him, looking like a deer in the headlights, until she remembered he had asked her a question. "Yes. I mean, no. No, this isn't a bad time. Come on, sit." She moved jerkily, clearing the two chairs that flanked her desk. "I'm sorry this room is such a mess, I've just had it for a week and I still need to organize it."

There was a small smile on his face as he sat down. "Congrats, by the way. I heard the good news from Ino."

"Thank you..." she smiled briefly, and sat across him behind the safety of her desk. The desk she owned wasn't as grand as the Hokage's desk - if she wanted to, she could easily lean over to touch his shoulder. She observed him the way she would any other patient, looking at him from head to toe. He obviously hadn't slept well for the past few days, but who had?

"I would have seen you sooner, but I was out of Konoha the past two weeks."

She raised her eyes to look at him, stunned. That would explain his absence, but why? Where else would he have been? "Oh."

"I was in Suna."

"... Oh."

There was another long silence. Thoughts raced through Sakura's head a million miles a minute - why was he in Suna? She knew Temari was there. What was he doing? Was he moving away? Did he need to leave? Was he going to? Did the war make him realize what mattered?

"You're not going to ask me why?"

She shook her head. "You'd tell me if you wanted to." She wouldn't look at him, wouldn't dare. She, instead, busied herself with looking at the random folders she had gathered on her desk. They were completed medical reports, but she used those to occupy her mind, anyway.

"I was there to... To properly break things off with Temari."

Her heart stilled, yet roared in her ears. "... I see."

"Look at me."

Sakura immediately looked up, her green eyes locking in on his darker ones. "Bear with me, Sakura, because I was never good at this kind of stuff." She nodded, but noted that his hands were connected and forming a circle with his fingers - a habit of his she knew that he did when he was thinking deeply. "I want to properly thank you for saving my life."

"It was no trouble, Shikamaru." She said softly. "I would have-"

"You cried for me."

Her face burned, and she looked down at her reports, the names of places and body parts blurring together. Trust him to remember that detail. "Shikamaru-"

"And I heard you." His voice remained calm, steady. She had no idea how he was doing it. "I heard you telling me not to leave you. Not like he did."

"I would have never forgiven you if you died," she replied, finally giving in. Sakura looked out the window, not knowing that Shikamaru would commit that image of her to memory for the rest of his life. "I would have killed you."

Shikamaru smiled wryly. "That's redundant."

"I wouldn't have cared," she shot back. "I wasn't even thinking about my chakra reserve. I was being such an idiot. I was taking everything that Tsunade had taught me - not to cry, not to waste chakra, not to waste time - and throwing it out the window."

"To save me."

"To save you," she nodded. She bit her bottom lip, wondering what was coming next.

"Do you want to know what I was thinking about during that time?"

She remembered the look on his face, the soft, gentle look. Despite her better judgement, she nodded slowly, looked him in the eyes. "Tell me."

He slowly leaned back in his chair, not breaking eye contact with her. "I was thinking that... For more than half of my life, I didn't like seeing you cry. You might have noticed I tried to stop you every time I saw you cry. And here I was, about to die, and you were crying over me." He chuckled, scratching the back of his head. "It was pretty ironic, if you ask me."

She couldn't help but smile as she looked at him. "Yeah, I realized that..." She stood up, bringing a pile of folders with her. Sakura approached one of her file cabinets, one of the first things she installed in her office, and started sorting out the folders alphabetically. "You always knew the right thing to say to me, and for that, I'm-"

Sakura was suddenly entrapped between two arms, pinned between her cabinet and Shikamaru's strong chest. "-Grateful," she squeaked out, hugging the folders she had not put in the cabinet yet to her chest.

"Why did you cry for me?" His warm breath tickled her ear, and she shivered, fighting back a blush.

"Wh-Why wouldn't I cry for you?" she whispered. "I was about to lose one of my... Friends."

"Is that hesitation I hear?" he asked, the hint of a smile in his voice.

Sakura hurriedly stuffed the folders in the filing cabinet, and shoved the drawer closed. Now that there was a bit more space between them, she turned around, her back to the cabinet. Undeterred, Shikamaru stepped closer to her, only inches away from her face, his eyes turning a darker shade then they normally were. "Hm?"

"I cried for you because I was going to lose you, okay?" Sakura muttered, crossing her arms over her chest. She frowned, looking up at the ceiling of her office. "I saw your life slipping away from me, and I was so close to losing it, and... I couldn't, I just couldn't lose you." She bit her lip. "That's why."

She didn't dare look at him. She knew that if she tried, there would be no way for her not to completely act on her emotions. She was a rational, clear thinker. Actions had consequences, and she had no idea what these consequences were if she so much looked up at him.

Sakura froze as she felt one of his hands brush her cheek as he reached up, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear. "I always thought you were always looking at Uchiha, you know. Hoping." His voice was slower, cautious. She wondered why; until she realized that he was checking if she was still in love with Sasuke. Her heart sped up.

"I used to," she said softly, her voice low, uncertain. "Until you made me realize I deserved more than that."

(*)

He loved her.

There was absolutely no doubt in his mind, now. From the moment she offered him a riceball until the time he set foot in this office, he had always been doubtful of his own feelings towards her. Yes, he admired her. Of course he wanted to see her happy. And he most definitely hated it when she cried. But love, and care, those were different things. Things he had never been sure about, or felt, until that moment. And he was being completely consumed by them.

There was a part of him that realized that maybe he had been harboring these feelings for a while now. There must have been some force in him that was always telling him to comfort her, some internal compass that guided him to where she was, some being that taught him the right things to say to her. This beautiful, grossly unappreciated young woman in front of him was all he could ever ask for.

Even though she was nothing but simple, and she would be troublesome, and that their life (if they even had a long one together) would be far from boring, he couldn't help but look forward to that.

"Sh... Shikamaru? Say something, okay? So that I don't feel like a complete idiot?" she piped up, sounding unsure of herself.

Shikamaru couldn't help but smile briefly before he used one hand to gently tilt her chin upwards. "Look at me," he said to her for the second time that day.

"What is it with you and me looking at you?" Sakura asked, her green eyes, his favorite color, dancing with a myriad of emotions. He saw fear, nervousness, uncertainty, and yes... There was that look of hope he had always, always wished she would direct towards him.

"Can't a man enjoy looking at his favorite color?" Shikamaru drawled. He watched, amused, as her eyes widened a fraction before he leaned in, closing the gap between them.

The first time they kissed each other was the first time they felt whole.

(*)

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! I can't believe I finished this! It's funny how I thought this would be shorter than Shikamaru's chapter - I didn't want to rehash all of the scenes, when you've obviously read through them, but in the end, I couldn't help myself. I kept saying, 'No, no! Add more depth, add more story while you can!'

I enjoy writing chapters in Sakura's point of view - but I also love writing Shikamaru as well, which is why I couldn't help but let Shikamaru end the story. He was the one who started it (technically) anyway.

Leave your thoughts! I love writing ShikaSaku fics, but I'm not sure if I got their characters right. I just wish they would flow through me as easily as other characters do (cough cough Ino cough cough Kakashi) (Wait no I don't mean I ship them it's just I love writing them so much, it's not even a job for me).

If you liked this, keep an eye out for a future fic of mine - I'm planning on re-writing and overhauling an old ShikaSaku fic of mine, mainly one of the first fics I published on this site.

As always, I do hope you enjoyed reading this fic, as much as I enjoyed writing it. See you soon!