I walked in the Warbler's meeting room fidgeting with my tie. I smiled at the boy who invited me; Jason. He beckoned me forward and I walked into the room.
"Okay guys, Jason has invited a new boy to audition for the Warbler's. What is your name again?"
"Sam," I said.
"Okay Sam, you have the floor."
I cleared my throat and remembered to lower my voice.
"Um hi guys. Like I said, I'm Sam, and er, I'd love to be a Warbler. Because you, I mean we, are all guys, so it must be hard to find a guy with a really girly voice, but well...my voice is quite girly...which I er...think would be quite a valuable...asset," I stumbled. Damn my fear of speeches.
The leader guy nodded at me to sing.
"Let me know that I've done wrong, when I've known this all along.
I go around a time or two, just to waste my time with you."
Obviously, I changed the key so the whole pitch was higher up, but I thought it was appropriate to sing All American Reject's Dirty Little Secret.
"I'll keep you my dirty little secret.
Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret.
My dirty little secret."
As I was singing I looked around and inspected the boys. Well, I checked them out. Which I totally should not have done seeing as they all thought I was a boy. But I saw this one guy, sitting at the back on his own, staring glumly at his cell phone. He looked so sad. I was looking at him for a long time that when he eventually looked up, we made eye contact and I nearly forgot my lines. His eyes were so big and puppy like, a beautiful chocolate brown, I could feel myself melting. He had dark hair which he slicked back with waaay too much gel. His skin was quite tanned and he was...well...hot. And cute. A mixture of both.
I finished the song and looked around. They all clapped and the leader guy, who I discovered was called Wes, smiled at me, but he wasn't the leader. It was the glum looking guy, Blaine Anderson.
He stood up, walked over to me with a big smile on his face, and shook my hand.
"Welcome to the Warblers," he said.
When he thought no one was looking his smile faded.
The bell rang for class so I walked over to Jason because we had biology together next. When I was sure no one would hear us in the crowded corridor I turned to him.
"Why is Warbler Blaine so sad?"
"His boyfriend was a senior last year, but at another school. He went to New York with this girl, who I think is his best friend, to fulfil his dream. Blaine misses him, I guess."
I didn't say anything else. So Blaine was gay. Typical. The good looking ones always were.
"So, are you guys pretty tolerant with homosexuality?"
"Oh yeah! We do not accept any ignorance of any sort. And harassment or bullying is not acceptable. We pretty much don't care what your religion, sexuality or race is here."
We reached the biology lab just as he turned to say, "So you can let your sexuality reign free, every gay guy is out of the closet here." And with that he went to his seat. My jaw dropped. I sat away from because he already had a lab partner and was still in shock. He thought I was gay, oh my. Well, I suppose I like boys, which is what being male and gay is all about, but still...I wasn't quite sure how to process it. I mean, should I tell everyone I'm gay? Or tell them I'm straight. I was so confused, I was straight, not gay, but as a guy I was gay...I decided to just leave it. You didn't have to tell people your sexuality after all, did you?
A month passed at Dalton Academy and everything was going perfectly. No one realised I was really a girl and I was becoming friendly with all the Warblers. Even Blaine. It turns out we had a lot in common. One day, after we did a pretty funky jamming session as everyone started to leave my bag split and everything fell out.
"Ah shit," I mumbled, and bent down to pick everything up. Jason hung back but I told him to go on without me. I thought I was alone and started humming a song to myself. But as I stood up with all my books in my arms I turned around and jumped, dropping all the books to the floor again. Blaine was standing in front of me a deep look of sorrow on his face.
"Oh, sorry Sam."
"Oh no, it's ok. Hey what's wrong?" I said, putting a comforting hand on his shoulder.
"It's...no it's nothing."
"Is it Kurt?" I asked. Then I wished I hadn't. I wasn't technically supposed to know, he never talked to me about his boyfriend.
"How did you-?" he said, cocking his head to the side and knitting his eyebrows together. Something he did when confused that I found so freaking adorable.
"I um, just, gossip, you know."
"Oh. Well...yes it's Kurt," he said. He let out a big puff of air and sat down on the floor. I hesitated then sat down next to him. He was silent for a while so I started grabbing all the scattered books back.
I finished making a pile and he still hadn't said anything. "Erm, Blaine? Do you want to talk about it?"
"Kurt was the love of my life. And then he just left. I mean, I knew he was going, but I still miss him. And...well we kinda broke up before we left. But I just can't stop thinking about him. I wait and wait for his text and it never comes. And...I'm sorry. It doesn't matter."
I grabbed his hand and squeezed it. "It does matter, Blaine. And you know you can come talk to me anytime you want?" I said softly. Then I realised I was speaking too high pitched and girly. I coughed and lowered my voice, "If you want to bro, you know, whatever." I quickly dropped his hand and stood up. He stood up too.
"You know, it's totally cool to be gay here."
"I'm not gay! I like boys!"
Blaine frowned and laughed a little, "well, then...you are gay."
"Oh no I er, I meant I don'tlike guys. I like girls. Yep, girls. All hot and...er...booby." I tried.
"Ooookay...but if you need to talk to anyone about it...then I'm here."
I smiled, "thanks Blaine."
We looked at each other until I realised I was late.
"Oh crap, I'm late for biology! See you Blaine! Bye!"
I turned and ran out the class room, looking over my shoulder at Blaine.
