A/N- Thanks to all those who reviewed! Each one means the world to me.
Raoul/Buri Wedding"No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Do you realize I could have you in the courts for insubordination?"
"….Yes. But you wouldn't, Jon. You don't have the heart….right?"
"Try me."
Jon grinned evilly, and Raoul decided to put something slimy and moving in his sovereign's bed that night. They were in his study, Raoul being called to 'have a talk' with his majesty after he publicly explained that there would be 'absolutely no ball after the wedding'.
"But Jon, why do we need a reception ball? They're stupid, pointless, a waste of time and money-"
"But you're missing out on the key fact!" said Jon, playing with his hands. "I get to see you dance."
Raoul scowled at him. "So you want to be scarred for life?"
"What do you mean?" asked Jon, sincerly confused.
"I can't dance," whispered Raoul, who buried his head in his hands.
"I thought the pages were all taught to learn how to dance," said Dom smoothly, enjoying every minute of Raoul's pain.
"That was years ago! And I haven't danced in years, literally. Please, Dom, teach me how to dance. And don't tell anybody."
Dom smiled coolly, a plan that only he could conceive coming into his head. "Of course not sir. When would you like your first lesson?"
Raoul glanced around the empty stables, barren but for hay, horses, and Dom. "Now?" he asked, sounding small. He stared at his feet.
Dom jumped from the hayloft and landed next to him. He grabbed Raoul's hands.
"You see, sir, dancing had changed over the years. It's much more…provocative lately."
"Really?" asked Raoul, oblivious to Dom's hidden snickers. Dom's plan went on the fact that Raoul hadn't been to a ball in years.
"Yes, sir. Nowadays the man places his hands…here, with me being the woman."
He placed Raoul's hands on his chest.
Raoul's eyebrows went up. "Really? Are you sure you're not having me on, here?"
"Sir, believe me. How else did I get my reputation for being the best dancer at court??" Dom replied. Gods, he thought. He must have had one too many giants bash him on the head.
Raoul nodded. "Continue."
"We'll start with the waltz. I put a foot backwards, and you put the opposite foot forwards."
With a resounding thunk, Raoul clumsily jammed his foot to the ground.
"Sir, I must say that you are terrible at dancing. Even Kel is better than you," the Sergeant said, noting Raoul's eyebrows shoot upwards.
"And how do you know that?" he asked.
Kel felt downright evil. Diabolical. Maniacal. Anything of that sort.
She was in her rooms, going through Lalasa's wedding dress plans for Buri. After Dom telling her earlier of his interesting lesson with her former knight-commander, she decided to jump in the plans of Let's-Make-Raoul-Look-Like-A-Fool.
A knock came on her door, and Kel didn't have time to stuff the papers anywhere before The Lioness herself marched in.
"Kel?" she asked. "Buri's looking for you- what are those?" She pointed to the papers.
"Oh, nothing," she said, "just reports."
"They don't look like reports," muttered Alanna, snatching the papers and leafing through them. "They're…dress plans. Gods, Kel, you're playing with fire here. If Buri catches you…"
"Did I ever tell you I'm a pyrotechnic?" she asked Alanna, who grinned. Kel gave her a questioning look, and Alanna replied, "I'm in."
"Thayet!" yelled Buri. "I…the dress…gods all curse!"
Thayet came bustling over to Buri, who had wriggled herself into the wedding dress moments before. Thayet glared at her. "What did you do to it?" she asked, her voice calm.
"I didn't do anything!" yelled Buri. "It came like this!"
The room, which Alanna had used years before for her own wedding, was empty but for the three women. From her position leaning on the counter full of face paint, Alanna tried not to grin at her and Kel's work.
They had scratched out Buri's measurements on the papers, and Lalasa had made the dress in the new measurements. Now, the dress was three inches too long, an inch too big at the waist and three too big in the bosom.
"This is a problem," muttered Thayet, wiping the sweat off her hands on her breaches. "A really, really big problem."
"My breasts are going to fall out!" Buri yelled, and Alanna couldn't help but snort at the poor woman.
"The wedding is in two hours!" said Thayet to herself, running in circles. "Oh gods oh gods…"
"Don't bother the gods with this, Thayet," said Alanna. "They have to worry if the scenery will at all match Buri's dress."
The queen glared at her. "Alanna, do Buri's face paint." A look came over Thayet's face. "On second thought, no," she said, which caused even Buri to laugh. "Instead, you see that lock of hair in her face? Can you cut that off? Carefully?"
A lock of hair had indeed escaped the restraints of the pulled-back hair. Alanna un-sheathed her knife, and exchanged glances with Buri…
Alanna gave points to Buri. Even though her dress was half-ruined, she still had enough nerve to make Thayet even more insane.
She chopped off the lock carefully, just as Thayet said. The queen looked up from her pacing, nodding. Then, grabbing the knife loosely, Alanna's knife slid through Buri's pulled-back hair, causing a rather large chunk to fall to the floor.
"Sorry, Buri," grinned Alanna. "I think I lost my grip."
Thayet looked up, and screeched.
Buri and Alanna doubled over, Thayet grabbing the knife and trying to level out Buri's head. When she was done, Buri resembled a circus freak.
Thayet took the knife and thrust it in Alanna's sheath. "We'll get a mage on that," she said calmly. "But not Alanna."
The Lioness grinned, and put a few well-placed pins in the dress. "There," she said. "The dress will hold, as long as you don't bend too far over."
Buri smiled. "Thanks, 'Lanna. See, Thayet? Nothing to worry about."
Wait and see, Alanna though. Wait and see.
The wedding was held outdoors, under a white canvas that had been placed over the whole event to shade them from the elements. The day was overcast, but nothing could stop Buri from walking down the aisle.
Kel, who was a close friend of Buri's, was allowed to sit in the row closest to the altar beside Alanna. The two monarchs were on a raised dais to the side, in their wedding finest.
When Buri emerged and began to walk down the aisle, everyone gasped: The wedding dress was scantily low, making the men blush and the women putting their hands over their husband's eyes.
Looks like my pins aren't holding too much, Alanna told herself with a smile. Buri's dress left the collarbone area empty, and instead small pieces of fabric joined the lead down her arms in sleeves. In thus meant the dress was supposed to support itself with the bosom, which it was failing at.
At the alter, Buri took Raoul's hand, who seemed very preoccupied with her breasts.
"My eyes are up here, my dear," she whispered to him. He reddened.
Everyone shifted in his or her seat, and silence descended upon the hundred or so guests.
"Welcome," said the priest in a voice that Alanna wished she had at her own wedding, "and today we are witnessing the joining of two lives. Instead of myself stating why these two love each other, they have written their own vows. I therefore wish to present Sir Raoul of Goldenlake and Malorie's Peak to you."
The crowds turned their eyes to Raoul, who coughed.
"Today," he said in a neutral voice, trying to look Buri in the eyes, "my dreams are coming true. Buri, you've always been my breast friend-"
He paused, and the crowd's eyes popped open. Thayet held back the wish to tackle Raoul.
"And-and best friends are always there for you." Raoul continued without any further mistakes, and Buri said her vows with such sincerity that made even Alanna want to cry. When the priest finally married them, the crows erupted into a roar that marked the end of Raoul's bachelorhood that was known around the realm.
Raoul bent to kiss her, and as he did so, Buri felt an uncomfortable breeze where she knew there should not be. When she looked down, she found that he dress had slipped to under her bosom.
The crowd gasped- the men stared while the women tried even harder to cover their eyes. Alanna felt terrible for her friend, but knew that her ultimate prank had been pulled when she placed the pins in such a position.
"Well," commented Raoul as Buri tried to hoist her dress up, "it's not like I haven't seen them before."
Alanna and Kel both tried to not kill themselves from laughter, and even the monarchs tried not to grin as once again the pair went into a kiss, Buri's hands glued to the dress.
The dancing hall was beautiful, with elaborate tapestries and intricate statues placed at intervals along the wall. Tables were placed at the sides for those who wished not to dance. Jon called for silence on his dais, Thayet at his side.
"We wish," he said with a playful tone, "to have the couple lead the first dance."
Raoul grabbed Buri's hand, who still had one hand glued to her chest. "You know," he told her, "I was finally taught how to dance."
-
"Oh, gods," whispered Dom to Kel on the sidelines, "he's actually going to do it."
-
When the orchestra struck up the tune, Raoul daintily placed his hands on Buri's chest. Her eyes went open. "And who exactly taught you this dance?" she asked, placing her hands on his hips.
"Dom…why?"
"Let's just say a whole lot of conservatives are going to be hunting for you, tomorrow," she told him. He looked at the sidelines, and every guest looked stricken at the position of his hands. Dom was nowhere to be found.
He took her hint. "This isn't how you dance?"
"No," she said, whirling around in circles with him, "but I like it just fine."
Raoul grinned at his new wife, and thought to himself, Dom, if you ever get married, you don't know what's coming.
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A/N- For LouLaBelle13, who recommend Raoul/Buri. Please review!
