Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto…sadly. Neither do I own any of the songs mentioned in the Fanfict. Any OC's mentioned I do own.

Plot: What happens when The Akatsuki gets new members? And one of them is Sakura? The hell? From Ex ANBU, Experiments, Bounty hunters and a 12 year old, these people are gonna raise hell. Contains both Het. and Yaoi pairings. OCXOC, KakuXOC, ItaXSaku

"Please be joking…"

"Ne? Why would I joke about something this serious, oni-chan?"

"You are never serious."

"I am too!"

"…"

"Sometimes…"

The Akatsuki base!

A figure cloaked in shadows snuck through one of the many hallways of the Akatsuki base, trying to not wake any of the residents. TRYING being the keyword. The figure, humming the Mission Impossible theme, clung to the shadows occasionally letting out a small squeak when they thought someone was coming. Upon reaching the living room, it suspiciously peeked around the corner. The cost is clear! Well…except for Deidera passed out on the couch… Not like he'll stop them. Tiptoeing passed the bomber, they finally reached the kitchen. SUCCESS! After making their way toward a locked cabinet, the figure pulled a hair clip out of their messy mouse brown hair before getting to work.

Somewhere on the border on the border of Taki

The crackle of fire merged with the chirping of crickets as two figures argued late into the night.

*Sigh* "Oni-chan!" The first figure was probably 4ft 4 and most likely the loudest of the two.

"What for fucks sake!" The second stood at 6ft 1, easily towering over her comrade, and the one most likely to tear your head off. The first mumbled something about old women and anger issue, earning a whack to the head by the other.

"Ow!"

"Watch your mouth brat." Suddenly the tallest one heard a sharp crack and spun around, facing the northwest of their camp. Four sebon between her fingers, aimed at the newcomers twitched.

"Relax Rosin, it's just us."

"I'd prefer NOT to be killed by a senile old woman." The familiar figure of Echo jogged into the clearing, setting down beside the younger girl while her two shorter companions preferred to stay away from the twitching 'old' woman. They could clearly see a vein on her forehead twitching and they rather liked having their heads attached to their necks, thank you very much.

"I'm only 72, damnit!" The woman raged. She clearly didn't look it…Her Blood red hair barely reached her shoulders and looked liked someone took an axe to it. Her serphant like red eyes twitched as the two laughed. She wore no top, instead opting to have her chest tightly bound by red cloth that stood out against her pale skin. The same cloth was wrapped around her arms, stopping at her wrists, and around her waist over knee length black shorts. Ankle length, high heeled boots and black snake bites completed her look.

"Hell, you ARE old!" The youngest one giggled, brushing back her dirty blonde hair from her icy blue eyes.

"At least I don't look like a child!" Rosin shot back. Indeed, she barely looked older than 10. Her petite body was dressed in a brownish yellow dress that reached about mid thigh with sleeves that reached past her wrists and covered her hands. She kept tugging down her blue and gold shorts and picking at the gold slip-ons she wore. She grunted, wrapping her arms around her middle.

"At least I don't look like a bloody whore!"

"Please stop. I am not in the mood to heal you idiots if you get into a fight." One of the women, sitting farther away from the group bit out, emerald eyes narrowing as the blonde girl pouted.

"But Sakura! She started it!"

"And I'll end it!" The other snarled, her light pink hair pulled back into a pony tail ending at the nape of her back. And keeping her bangs back was her forehead protector, the symbol of her home village slashed.

The Akatsuki base

Deidera awoke with a start as at first, a single crash resounded from the kitchen, before several more breached the once quiet base and a familiar voice muttered an oops. With narrowed eyes, Deidera stood from the couch, making his way around the coffee table, and headed toward the kitchen.

"Oi! Brat! What the hell are you-"His shout cut off, eyes widening, as he spotted the cause of the racket and his more frequent headaches standing in the middle of a battlefield of different sized pots and pans.

"Uhhh…Hi Dei-Dei." The small girl giggled nervously, shifting to hide something behind her back.

"For the last DAMNED TIME do not call me DEI-DEI! And what are you doing?" Quickly scanning the kitchen he came across something that almost made his heart stop. Oh god no… The previously locked cabinet was wide open and the contents spilling out onto the cabinets and floor. Sugar. Cookies. Small snack cakes. Quickly spotting a box of previously unopened Fudge cakes OPEN AND MISSING at least half of the treats a warning bell went off in his head and he nervously turned his gaze to the twitching girl. And twitching she was. She blinked rapidly, and her tanned lips twitched. But what alarmed him the most was that tears were quickly forming in her pale violet eyes.

"Please don't tell me you…Oh god DON'T start the crying!"

"D-Dei-Dei-chan's mad at me!" She collapsed onto the ground, threw her head back and let loose one of the loudest screeches Deidera has ever heard. Not that that was a good thing…

"Damn, I'm sorry!" He yelped, covering his ears. She's gonna wake everyone up! Before he could get the hell out of there a feminine growl froze the blonde to the very core.

"The hell did you do?" A blue blur shot past him, pushing him into a counter, and wrapped its arms around the small child. Amber eyes glared up at the blonde through blue bangs as she gently petted the brunette's hair.

"Heh…Hi Konan…" He gulped, "I was…uh…" He yelped as a paper shiruken flew past his head and imbedded itself into the wall behind him. He was so screwed. As if fate wished to mock him even more, the hair on the back of his neck started to stand on end as if he was being watched 'glared! GLARED!'

"It's three in the fucking morning Deidera!" With a gulp, fates favorite chew toy turned and faced the familiar pierced face of his leader. Who was a very, very pissed off man.

"I know that Leader-Sama. I was…"

"Then enlighten me as to why you were bothering Haro-chan. And no excuses!" Deidera twitched. He didn't even do anything!

A/N Cliff hanger! Sorta…All of the ooc's will be introduced, Haro's existence will be explained and as well as how the hell Sakura became a rouge in the next chapter!

Sakura: You don't even know why I am a rouge do you?

Shoo! I'm making this up on the fly! Not everything is planned out.

Sakura: …This is why you fail at school…

Shut up! Oh, I ended up making a mistake saying that one of my characters was an ANBU last chapter. She's not. She's more like the…Head interrogator… yeah… Please Review!