A/N: Hey Everyone! I can't believe I have gotten that many follows and favs! And I love all the comments and suggestions! (Though two of you are on the right track about where I want this story to go!) Also the Jeca pairing will be explained. Also I am not sure how I feel about introducing BeKommissar only because I had others in mind about in the plot line. Hopefully this chapter eases the hate for Chloe cause I hate writing Chloe as a bad person. Thanks and lets get to the show... P.S.: The Italicized parts are memories, the bold are inner thoughts and the bold italicized are inner thoughts in the past. This is just to clear up any confusion.

:)

Today is the day. I am going to see her and I have no idea what the hell I am going to do. Maybe this is a bad idea, I mean what am I really expecting… Of course it is a bad idea Chloe, what the weirdest time to approach her and in public?! I shake my hands and my whole body trying to get rid of the nerves. Beca Mitchell hates me and I cant blame her. Did I really expect her to just get over it? Maybe but I had my reasons, reasons that I didn't give her because I was too terrified. She deserves better than me, I mean look at what I have done. I look in the mirror and I cant see me. I mean, I am there, but I can see right through me. Theres nothing, no light or happiness behind my eyes, but I have gotten really good at faking it.

As I left our house, my stomach dropped. The water works that I had prevent from happening in front of Beca, were let loose. I throw my stuff in the car and took one last look into our house. And I see her… See my Beca wrapping herself with her arms and sobbing…

Closing my eyes I shake the memory away. Still thinking about it now, I still get chills. I knew I did it… Everything I said broke her, and I will regret it for the rest of my life. Boy, did I get it from Aubrey the next day. Apparently Aubrey went looking for me at the house that Beca and I owned. Duh stupid thats where you lived. And when no one answered Aubrey let herself in with the key we had given her. I still remember how she rung me out over the phone when I finally answered. Who knows what she saw in the house but I knew it wasn't good.

"Hello?"

"CHLOE WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?!" I winced at her screaming.

"Uh I am-well…"

"FUCKING ANSWER ME CHLOE."

"I am at the Marriot…" She hung up and I knew she was on her way and would go to the ends of the Earth to find me at this point.

It got much worse when I came face to face with Aubrey. When Aubrey was pissed she was scary. I knew that even though Beca and Aubrey weren't the best of friends, they still protected each other from any kind of pain.

I heard her screaming my name down the hall and I groaned. I wasn't ready to face her and she had gotten here a lot quicker than I thought she would. She was definitely on a mission.

"Chloe Beale. You better get the fuck out right now…" I prepared myself and opened the door and poked my head out. Her back was too me but I saw the anger that was radiating off her. She snapped her head around and narrowed her eyes and approached me fast.

"Get in." Is all she said and I walked into my room with her following me. She slammed the door and I turned around with my eyes fixed on the floor.

"You better start explaining yourself." Was all she said. She didn't yell but the tone still frightened me. I started fidgeting and I couldn't stop myself this time. I started letting the tears fall. "Oh no Chloe, your crying wont stop me from anything. What the fuck is wrong with you? What the fuck did you do to Beca?" I look up and Aubrey looked like she was going to combust.

"I… Aubrey listen…" Is all I could manage when I started gasping for air. All the emotions that I held in when I was in front of Beca started pouring out. I fucking lost Beca…

"Chloe stop right now. Why did you leave? Why did you say to her? Whatever you did… It broke her Chloe you do realize that…" She said as she approached me grabbing my arms.

"She doesn't need me, she doesn't need a terrible person Aubrey and I have to save her from me even if it does mean that I lie to her. I said so many things but it has to be this way…"

I wipe away the tears that fall. Even though it was long ago I still cant help but feel like shit. I hurt the one person that I cared about and she let me in even though I told her that I would never hurt her. Fuck Chloe, was it worth it? I ask myself because I still question everything. She has to find someone better was what I told myself everyday. She will find someone better, is what I said every time her text or her phone calls came in. I had to keep pushing her away to get her to go a different path. When she started coming to the places I stayed at, I couldn't face her. I couldn't face her because what do you say to someone you were supposed to protect? What do you say to someone that gave you everything and you just ripped it away? I shouldn't have lied to her that day… No I had to, I had to tell her those things to finally let her see that she needed someone better than me. I did the right thing that day… Right…?

I knew Aubrey would always be my friend but I was happy she didn't just say I was right because we were friends. I understood that she picked the side that was morally right. Beca needed someone because of my poor decisions. Aubrey and I occasionally talk and every time the topic of me asking about Beca came up she brushed it off with a simple, 'How do you think she is…' and that was it. She asked me on several occasions to just talk it out with her but I declined. I still wasn't ready for her to see me, I wasn't ready to let her see the broken Chloe. I was mentally broken and Beca knew but she never knew the extent of it. She deserves to know now Chloe… You owe her that and much more…

I am ripped away from my thoughts with the sound of someone knocking on my door. I take a deep breath and tell the person at the door to come in.

"Chloe babe, are you ready?" says Tom. See Tom, was the closest guy friend I ever had. He was there for big moments in my life. We had this on and off relationship and at the beginning he treated me like shit always telling me what was wrong with me, which led to our break up senior year at Barden. After that Beca was the sole purpose of my existence, until of course Tom rear his head in and lets just say he made me snap…

"Yea I am ready, let me just put my shoes on." I smile lightly. I noticed after Beca my smile never reached its furthest point. With Beca, my face would hurt from smiling and laughing so much. But now, I was happy just to be able to force one. When Aubrey first heard of me getting back together with Tom she almost lost it. But I never told her that he may or may not have been the reason for my spilt with Beca…

"I am sorry Chloe I must have blacked out… You are back together with who…?" Aubrey said cupping her ear to here me correctly this time.

"Aubrey please don't… Don't lecture me like a child…" I said giving up.

"Dont lecture you? How could I not? I mean Chloe you are considering, actually considering dating that moron that made you feel like nothing, that made you feel like you were dirt. And yet you still ask me not to lecture you?! You went from someone who adored you, which you have yet to explain why you did, to an idiot who doesn't deserve for you too even look at him?" Aubrey said throwing her hands up. She didn't understand and I didn't want to explain it to her because I have yet to recover. Just try maybe she can help… No I have to finish this without someone who thought everything was perfect but they had no idea…

I heard the door to Aubrey's office open and a voice came with it.

"Babe! Where are you?! Baaaabbbbbbeeeeee…" It was Stacie and I cringed on the inside. After the incident Stacie couldn't stand the mention of me, let alone the sight of me.

"Stacie I am busy can you…" Thats when Stacie peered around the corner and stopped dead in her tracks…

"Oh I see you have yet to take out the trash…" Stacie said with pure disgust on her tongue. I immediately looked down. She had all the right in the world to treat me like this.

"Stacie please don't…" Aubrey started before she was cut off.

"Dont fucking start with me Aubrey. You saw what she did to Beca, you saw how she destroyed her…" Stacie then looked right at me…

"Look Chloe, I have tried my best to avoid you because frankly I really just want to punch you in the face for hurting Beca. But I wont hold my tongue anymore, especially since rumor is you are with that asshole Tom… Really you lead Beca on for what huh?!"

"Enough Stacie…" Aubrey said with a tone that wasn't convincing.

"No! How fucking dare you Chloe… How dare you…" At this point I started crying because everything she is saying is true. Everything.

"You don't deserve happiness Beale, you don't deserve Beca and you never will… Ever…" With that Stacie turned around and marched right out of Aubrey's office. I looked up to Aubrey and saw that she was torn. She knew everything Stacie said was true but I knew that she hated seeing me like this. I reached up to wipe away my tears…

"She's right Bree…" I slowly stood up and picked up my bag. "She's right. I know what I did and I know that I will never deserve her… I never did deserve her Bree. I never did…"

I finished getting ready. Tom had gotten better with the emotional strain he had with us. He wasn't that bad of a guy and he was starting to get better at caring. Nothing like Beca though. But it was too late for that. Maybe Beca deciding to be at the after party meant something. Maybe it meant I would get a chance to explain all my fucked up decisions…

The ride to the award show was uneventful. Tom was talking about how his accounting firm was doing business with other financial institutions and how a big deal it was. Blah blah blah… I was on the edge of my seat. The anticipation was killing me. I knew Beca wouldn't show up to the actual show but I was panicking. The car pulled up and I stepped out with Tom tailing behind me.

"Chloe over here! Can you answer a couple questions?" I was directed to a television station by my manager.

"Yes of course, shoot." I answered with a brief smile.

"How are you feeling?"

"I feel great." I laughed, a fake one obviously. "I am really crossing my fingers for my nominations.

"Yes we are for you too. I see that you are nominated for best supporting actress and your movie is nominated for best musical performance. How do you feel about that?"

"Well, I feel very lucky to have a great cast with me. We really worked off each others energy and it was just a great time." I smile waiting for the last question.

"Thats great and good luck to you and the cast. And before you leave, rumor has it the one and only Beca Mitchell will be participating in the after party, we all know of your sudden breakup care to express anything with us?" My throat went dry and my hands started to sweat. Fuck I should have known this would be a topic up for grabs…

"Well-uh…" I heisitated. What do I say to that. So I said the first thing that came you mind. "… Well I wish her the best of luck…" And with that I walked away… That was just fucking stupid Chloe… You 'wish her the best of luck'? Im sure that wasn't the question you idiot…

I continue down the line and anytime Beca came up, my manager just would steer me in a different direction. Of course everyone would ask something along those lines. I mean Beca and I were known for being open about the love we had for each other…

"Hey Beca and Chloe thanks for letting me ask you a couple questions."

"Yea no problem shoot…" Beca answered.

Beca and I attened last years movie awards and we always came together and were interviewed together…

"Ok so everyone knows that you guys are dating, heck even my mom knows!" He chuckled and Beca and I let out a small giggle. "But anyway everyone has been wondering what it is like to date DJ Mitchell?" He looked right at me.

"Well…" I was cut off by Beca.

"Let me go first because what everyone should be asking is what it is like to date the one and only Chloe Beale." Beca stated matter of factly. "Ok so you know when you go into nature right, and you catch this breath taking view of the sunset and trees and all that good stuff and you just stare." Beca turns to look at me. "You just keep staring because you cant pull away. You are so captivated by the view that if you do turn away you will never feel like that again. You are mesmerized by the beauty that it feels like you are under a spell." I began to blush. God how I loved when she talked like this. "And thats just looking at her, when you are around Chloe it feels like warmth. It feels like you are never alone or cold, if that makes any sense." Beca lets out a chuckle. "Chloe is the definition of beauty and of love and you have no idea how lucky I am everyday to call Chloe mine. Chloe is the love of my life and I have no idea what I would become with out her, nor do I want to know…"

God how I missed those times. Guess everyone did get to see what it was like to not have Beca… I am sadden by the memory and how everything came to pieces. You did this Chloe you are the only one to blame. I have to stop if I want to keep faking it. I feel sick and all I want to do is go home and lay down… In Beca's arms…

"Chloe, honey, are you ok?" Tom says pulling me out of the sick feeling. He looks concerned and then I think maybe this is what I deserve now…

"Yea I am fine, I think its just something I ate…"

"Ok well how about we go inside and take our seats." I nodded and let him lead the way.

As predicted I was on edge the whole time during the award show, I didn't get best supporting actress but our movie did get best musical performance which was cool. Don't get me wrong I was happy but considering I don't have the motivation I did before it was just a small victory. As we file out I feel my nerves spike and I start to doubt my decision to even go. Just go home, Chloe. You don't deserve to explain yourself anymore. I start to agree with my brain when Tom has informed me that we have arrived. Fuck too late…

I stepped out and see theres a commotion in front of me. I try to see what is going on but instead I only can hear it.

"Beca! DJ Mitchell! Over here, how are you feeling?!"

"Mitchell! Did you know Chloe was gonna be here? Is that what you have decided to show up?"

"Come on Mitchell, Chloe has moved on she deserves better than you!"

At that last statement, my blood boils, how dare they even say that to Beca. They don't know what happened but they sure like to make it seem like Beca is some bitch. Luckily she must not have heard because the group she is with have made there way into the party. Luckily we made in too without much attention.

Craning my neck to see her I finally catch a glimpse of Beca. She looks so carefree dancing and enjoying her time. I look around her and see her dancing with Aubrey and Stacie and then I see Beca stop and I see what she has caused her to stop. Jesse has gotten close to her and has a flirtatious grin on his face. Beca wont like that, she never liked Jesse in… Did she just let him touch her?! I gasp and see that she has let him get close. She has her hands wrapped around his head and I start to breath heavy. She has never let anyone that close. Maybe she moved on fuck… I turn around and start to consume myself in my own misery. I need more drinks. Lets attempt to make it through this night shall we…

Beca's set was just… it was fucking beautiful. Her music ran through my veins and I felt on a music high all night. They way the music just flowed from that booth… God this woman… Wait is that Titanium… I blink towards the booth and let the mix sink into my body. She cant be playing Titanium mixes , they were just for me… I mull over the mix and think that maybe it's a sign… but I sign of what?

I see her walk down from the booth and she is engulfed in hugs from Aubrey and Stacie. Then out of no where Jesse is picking her up and pulling her away from the group. I look around and see that Tom is in a conversation with one of my cast mates and decided to trail them. I follow them outside to the patio and Beca looks so peaceful, she's coming down from her mixing high and she is so beautiful. I take a deep breath and walk towards them, I am contemplating what to even say when I noticed that Jesse is looking right at me with panic in his eyes. Here goes nothing…

"Uh-… Hey Beca… Hello Jesse…" I see her tense up and it looks like she has a death grip on his hand. She starts shaking her head and Jesse steps in front of me.

"Chloe what are you doing?" He's in protective mode and it further defends my opinion about them.

"I uh-" Think Chloe think… "I wanted to see if I could talk to Beca…" Fuck I guess straight to the point is ok.

"No." Beca says from behind Jesse.

"What the fuck Chloe, what are you doing here?!" Stacie says from behind Beca. I see Aubrey approach her from behind. Panic is written all over her face and I start to panic…

"I just wanted to see if Beca…"

"Dont, just don't." Beca says. She has her eyes closed and Jesse wraps an arm around her. "8 months Chloe, four of which were spent trying to get you to acknowledge me and this is how you… I fucking cant…" Beca walks away eyes still closed and Jesse and Stacie quickly follow her. Aubrey stands there and shakes her head and walks away. She turns around and mouths that she will call later, and I am left there. Left in my sorrow. I feel tears start to pool in my eyes and I cant take it, I have to get out of here.