Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist

As Envy jumped from rooftop to rooftop he started to get hungry. He took out a handful of red stones and ate it all in one gulp. The city of Central was very dreadful during the summer. But it beats being fried in Dublith. The building he was heading for was "The Central Hotel of Central". "Catchy name." Envy thought. "So this is where Mr. Pipsqueak is staying." As usual Envy jumped on top of the ledge. He looked to see if anybody was in the room. The room had no color to it. There was a brown table, a closet with a mirror on it, a green ice bucket to keep her food preserved, a stove, a bed with green covers and a very lovely picture of purple flowers inside a vase. "How dull looking." Thought Envy

Envy opened the window and silently crept in. When he was in he closed the window with a 'SLAM!' "Whoops, my bad" Envy thought to himself. He looked the window for just a moment, when he saw his least favorite character…..Edward. "What I would do to skin him……alive." The thought of skinning Edward alive and hearing his bloody screams of mercy put a smile on Envy's face. Envy took a look around the room, deciding to see what his guest was he opened the closet. What he found was a long red coat with a symbol of a snake wrapping itself on a cross, a black sleeveless shirt and some of Edward's pictures of him and Winry at Central Park. "Awwwwwww how cute. Not only am I in a midget's room but now I have found out his little love affair." But for some strange reason, he imagined himself in the picture. "Ewes." Thought Envy. He could never imagine himself with Ed. Now Envy started to talk to himself out loud. "Since this is FullMetal short's room I might as well wait for him." Envy then took out his paddle ball. Since the old bitch Dante wouldn't let him go outside unless it was for a mission then he would play with his paddleball. He was pretty good at playing paddleball too. He would play for hours on end. Usually though he would mess with Wrath saying that his mommy would never come back. And he would say how he was useless and how he would end up begging for food He also enjoyed picking on Greed by turning into a woman and started stripping in front of him. It was hilarious on how much Greed's leg began to shake. But soon he heard the door open and was greeted by an angry look. "Envy!" Ed yelled. What the hell are you doing here!?" "I could ask you the same thing you short pipsqueak." Said Envy in his usual sly tone. Edward reached his usual boiling point. "WHO THE HELL ARE YO CALLING SO SHORT THAT A INFANT IS TALLER!?!?!?!?!" yelled Edward. Envy just kept paddling his paddleball. "You know I think I might do something different to you to get a little information out of you." Envy continued. "I got this idea from the paddleball." Then Envy approached Ed with a sly smile on his face.

-5 minutes later-

When Alphonse got back to the room he thought Edward had gone mad. For what he saw were two men on the bed kissing. But it seemed Ed wanted to get out of it. When Alphonse left the room in a state of shock Envy let his lips part from Ed's. "Now tell me what you know about the Philosopher's Stone." said Envy. "Never!" replied Ed gasping for breath. "Fine then I guess that I'll have to seduce you even more. Oh and Ed, do you want to see if this is a boy form or a girl form?" Envy smiled knowing that he had won the battle. Edward now had a face of fear on. "FINE THEN YOU WIN JUST DON"T SHOW WHAT YOU'RE ABOUT TO SHOW ME!!!" cried Ed. "Speak or else." Envy said. "We….." "Yes?'' "We haven't made any progress." Ed said in a whisper. Envy just smiled. "Okay then; that's understandable. Now tell me this." Envy showed a picture of Winry to Ed. "Who is this girl?" Envy asked. "She's…..she's my…." Ed couldn't believe he was doing with this. "She is my mechanic." "Nothing else?" "No." replied Ed. "That's a good boy" said Envy patting Ed's head. "As a reward I am giving you this paddleball." He then handed Ed his paddleball. "Heheheh this is how I get a lot of my ideas. By playing paddleball." With that Envy jumped out of the window and left without a moment's notice. When Edward finally got his shirt on he saw Alphonse in the room. He saw the whole thing unfold in front of him right before his very eyes.

"Now Alphonse it's just a misunderstanding. Please don't get the idea." Said Ed trying to comfort his younger brother.

"Then tell me why didn't you just push him off?" asked Alphonse

"I panicked Al." said Ed.

"I…guess I should believe you." Said Al staring at the wooden brown floor.

"That you should." Said Edward.

-Meanwhile at Central Train station-

"All aboard to Rush Valley!" yelled the train conductor.

"Its time for me to look for the pipsqueak's girlfriend" thought Envy

Envy was still in his favorite green-haired form. Only he was wearing a business suit. He wore all Grey except for his inside shirt and his tie. The inside shirt and tie were violet. He stole the suit at a clothes store. He wanted that suit ever since he layed his eyes upon it in the "Dress for Special Occasions" store. He pretended to be a State Alchemist. (Preferably Edward Elric) and since he was the "FullMetal Alchemist" the suit was free. But the lady asked him why he needed that suit because it was too big for him. He just answered "It's for a friend." Envy tied his green hair into a ponytail like Ed's. The only difference was that it wasn't braded. With that, Envy left for Rush Valley in search of Edward's mechanic.

I will take a break from this story for a while and start Envy's little adventure called "The Envious Mechanic" It takes place where Envy left off in search of Winry. Keep a sharp eye out for it. You never know when I update.