Letting Go

by icypinkpop

Pairing: GokuxVegeta

Disclaimer: Just borrowing them for a while. I seriously hope there's no late fees…

Warnings: Slash (M/M), Shonen-ai, Uke Vegeta, swearing, references to rape, blood, crying, perhaps some OOC-ness, sap, implied masturbation, the list goes on.

Summary: Vegeta's feelings for Goku get the best of him one day, but his pride won't stand for it. Events that follow prove to change him forever. Summary sucks (as always). Just read.

Author's note: This chapter is…interesting. Some parts of it appear to be censored out, but I kinda have a habit of letting my readers piece together the story rather than explaining all of it in detail. Have questions? Email me. Enjoy. And PLEASE leave a review, constructive criticism is always appreciated!

"Text" - Thoughts.

"Text" - Spoken dialogue.

--

Chapter 2: Care -

Vegeta blinked in disbelief, mouth opening and closing wordlessly. No…not now…The idiot couldn't be here now…

The characteristic scent reached his nostrils, affirming the Prince's worst fear. Kakarrot was right beside him. He flinched inwardly, pain and humiliation trickling through his chest like cold water. This was the end. The third-class bastard had come to taunt him, to demolish his pride like an already cracked mirror. And there was no way in Hell that Vegeta could escape it now.

The Prince sighed, a sob threatening to escape his raw throat. He needed to see Kakarrot's face one last time, just once more before the gorgeous traitor broke what little hold on sanity he had left. Grunting, he forced himself onto his side, ebony eyes tracing the silhouette of his obsession's powerful form, the wonderfully taut muscles on gentle arms, the face so handsome that Vegeta couldn't keep himself from whimpering brokenly at the sight of it. He would give absolutely anything to fall into those arms one final time, to drown in those endless eyes…

--

The observer sucked in a deep breath, staring into the ebon orbs below him, fascinated as well as worried by the conflicting emotions that flashed through them much too fast to read. One look from his Prince, however, and the tall Saiyan was petrified. Vegeta's gaze held so much…pain, an agony that words alone seemed insufficient to describe. The glance sent shivers down his spine.

Goku was abruptly jerked from his trance when Vegeta sighed sadly, almost a whimper, and his tear-brimmed eyes fell shut, all signs of vitality vanishing from the lithe body. The gentle Saiyan's lips parted in horror, hands moving of their own accord to slide under the Prince's seemingly lifeless form. Goku quickly pressed a finger to Vegeta's lower jaw, sighing with relief when he felt a surge of royal blood throb against the digit. His Prince had merely fainted.

Unable to tear his eyes off the smaller's visage, which seemed to remain astonishingly beautiful despite its owner's lack of consciousness, Goku carefully raised Vegeta into his arms, ignoring the possible consequences that this particular action might have later. There would be time for that. There would be time for everything.

Casting a final concerned glance at his Prince's pained face and bruised body, Goku raised two fingers to his forehead, flickering out of sight.

--

Materializing once more into the small house, the tall Saiyan sighed with relief at the lack of noise, happily recalling the fact that his wife wasn't home. Chichi had gone off on a 'business trip' (her claims of which Goku had known to be fictitious ever since he had starting smelling the scents of other men lingering about the house) and, in truth, Goku had to admit he wasn't much displeased with her infidelity. He did feel twinges of guilt from time to time, knowing that his own actions had likely driven her away. But the lack of the yelling and stress her mere existence seemed to provoke seemed to more than justify the means.

Thoughts wandering back to his Prince, the gentle Saiyan softly shifted him in his arms, holding him tightly against his chest. His eyes traveled slowly over Vegeta's broken body, lingering on a particularly nasty wound that marred the soft, tan skin of his chest. Goku gulped, noting the amount of caked blood that had adhered itself to the Prince's hair and clothing, and bit his lip nervously. He would need to be bathed.

Sighing, the tall Saiyan lay Vegeta down on the large bed, gently sliding off the boots, then the gloves, one at a time. Goku unwittingly slid his hand against Vegeta's before pulling back quickly, exhaling sadly. This wasn't the time to admire the Prince's physical form, wonderful as it was. He felt ashamed for even thinking of his own personal desires.

A few minutes passed before Goku was able to fully strip the smaller Saiyan of the torn spandex that clung to him, mostly because he was trying to protect Vegeta's privacy by not letting his eyes wander more than necessary. Finally, after he had relieved himself of his own clothing, Goku gently lifted Vegeta to his feet, careful to support his weight. Slowly, he carried the unconscious Prince into the adjoining bathroom, slipping into the shower and turning on the water.

Steam floated about the warm air as he began to wash the smaller Saiyan, sliding a bar of soap around the bruised muscles before letting the stream of water rinse them clean. All desire turned to worry at the sight of Vegeta's abused flesh, the blood-crusted tail that hung limply between his thighs. Goku silently cursed himself for injuring his Prince so badly.

Biting his lip, Goku allowed his thoughts to drift back to the spar they had fought earlier that day. It had started out normally enough, him and Vegeta putting their all into the battle, blood and sweat and curses flying back and forth about the Gravity Room, but there had been something about the Prince that was different than usual. Though the tall Saiyan hadn't been able to put his finger on it at the time, he now realized that Vegeta had seemed less focused than he often did. More senseless and angry than calculating and cool. Well, before it had happened.

Goku shivered. He had never in a million years thought that Vegeta would trust him enough to allow that kind of vulnerability, to fall into his arms and cry into his chest. While the gentle Saiyan had assumed that the Prince's tears were due to physical pain, he now realized that there was something more behind those soulful eyes. Something deeper. Something that hurt much worse.

He shook his head detachedly, switching off the showerhead and blanketing Vegeta in a towel. He stared down concernedly into the smaller's face. What was hurting him so terribly? Was it something that could be healed?

Walking back into the bedroom, Goku carefully dried his Prince, noticing with relief that most of his wounds had stopped bleeding. Bending over in an attempt to dry Vegeta's lower back, the larger Saiyan felt his eyes widen, his ebony orbs scanning over the area in surprise.

There were scars, many around the area near Vegeta's tail, as well as others closer to his neck and shoulders. Goku frowned. He was as much of a warrior as the Prince, but he didn't have that many scars. And his own weren't nearly as deep or jagged-looking.

Putting the thought out of his mind, he walked over to his closet and dug out a pair of loose, black pants that he had outgrown. He gently slipped Vegeta into them, tying the drawstring tight so that they would stay up around the narrow waist, and allowed himself to steal another glance at the Prince's face, feeling oddly guilty for doing so. The lithe Saiyan appeared to be unconscious as before, mouth slightly open, angular eyes closed. Goku was both relieved and saddened by the discovery.

Grasping Vegeta as gently as possible, Goku pulled back the bedcovers and set him down on the mattress, covering him with the sheet. He cocked his head to the side, observing a particularly dark bruise on the Prince's right arm, reaching out instinctively to caress it before pulling back guiltily. Suddenly, an idea popped into the tall Saiyan's mind, causing him to raise himself from the bed. Reluctantly tearing his eyes away from the object of his concern, Goku conjured up an image of Kami's Lookout in his head, leaving the bedroom behind as he pressed two fingers to his head.

--

"What do you mean you don't have any senzu left?!" Goku's eyes widened to an almost comical size, hands flailing out in front of the tall Saiyan.

Piccolo rolled his eyes. "I mean I don't have any." the Namek grunted, arms folded. "What's got you so excited?" He affixed Goku with an annoyed gaze.

The Saiyan looked down in disappointment, mentally apologizing to his unconscious Prince. "Nothing, Piccolo." he said quietly. "I just thought you'd be the guy to ask, since I've already visited Korin."

Goku bit his lip. He had really hoped that he would have been able to get some senzu back home before Vegeta woke up, but it looked like the latter was forced to heal naturally. He felt guilty for being unable to help his Prince.

Piccolo raised a hairless brow, watching Goku's distraught expression with slight concern. "Why do you need them, Goku?" he inquired. "You seem to be in pretty good shape."

"It's not for me…"

"For who, then?"

Goku gulped. "Well…Vegeta. H-he's hurt."

The Namek's eyes widened, glancing back at the tall building at the center of the Lookout. "I guess we could go find Dende." he suggested. "He might have a few in stock somewhere."

Slightly discouraged by the fact that this trip seemed to be taking longer than he had expected, Goku quickly followed Piccolo to the tall doors, sighing as images of his injured Prince floated through his mind.

--

Vegeta awoke to darkness, pain shooting mercilessly through his aching muscles. He slowly opened his eyes, confused by his surroundings. Where was the ground on which he had fallen? The Gravity Room?

Suddenly, the memories began flooding back, Vegeta's eyes drifting shut again in humiliation. Kakarrot. The bastard had found him. He remembered now.

He shifted onto his side and gasped at the unfamiliar sensation, wariness numbing the soreness in his body as thick blankets slid over bruised flesh. Why was he in…a bed? And what was tied around his waist? Pulling the covers off gingerly, he gazed down at the clumsily-knotted drawstring of his new pants, a look of terror creeping onto his visage. Kakarrot's scent hit him and he froze, shaking his head detachedly in denial. He had been brought here. He was in the third-class' bed.

Too weak to react physically in any way, the Prince let himself fall back down to the mattress, taking a deep breath despite himself. The tall Saiyan's scent pervaded every corner of his half-conscious mind, sending shoots of heat directly to his groin. Vegeta let his thoughts wander, only half aware of where he was, while images of his past materialized before his mind's eye. He felt Frieza's punishing lashes, the comforting hands of Raditz as they stroked his abused back, his own shaky gasps for more.

He groaned. Anything to take the pain away…anything to forget…

Muffling a sob, Vegeta turned around once again, hand sliding slowly downwards to rest between aching thighs…

--

A little smile crept onto Goku's face as he waved goodbye to Mr. Popo, the precious brown pouch clasped in his right hand. As it had turned out, Dende did keep a few extra senzu beans at the Lookout in case of dire circumstances. Though it had been a bit of a battle getting the teenage Namek to hand a few over, as the latter hadn't truly been convinced that there was actually an emergency going on and Goku was reluctant to tell him the details of what had happened, the tall Saiyan had finally gotten his way. He couldn't keep himself from sighing with both relief and worry, lips parting in thought. "I'm on my way, Vegeta."

--

Goku reappeared in his small kitchen, eyes darting towards the hall as he walked towards the bedroom. Reaching the door, he extended a hand and grasped the knob, freezing in place when the muffled sounds reached his ears. "Uhnnn…Raditz…"

The tall Saiyan's mouth opened slightly and he took an instinctive step forward, pushing the door open. Raditz? His supposed Saiyan brother? What was Vegeta…

Goku froze in place at the sight.

His Prince lay where he had been left, his lower half covered by only a single blanket, ribbons of pearly seed coating the mattress below him. Vegeta's shaking hands grasped the flimsy sheets, holding fast as if they were his last strands of life. Goku's eyes widened in realization, traveling up to the smaller Saiyan's tear-stained face, brow furrowing with confusion at the expression on his Prince's visage. Vegeta looked so…broken.

Taking a deep breath, Goku set the brown pouch on the bedside table, using all considerable will to keep himself from looking Vegeta in the eye. He didn't want to make matters any worse. Vegeta's pride seemed to be the only thing holding him together.

An empathetic tear trickling down his cheek, the tall Saiyan left the room, shutting the door gently behind him.

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Don't worry, it'll get better --; Thanks for reading XD