Guys... I seriously did not mean to take a whole month to update this! SORRY! Thank you for the lovely response!
Zoro scowled as he dragged Nami from the kitchen, allowing the door to slam behind him. He could hear Chopper's worried squeals as he tried to resuscitate Usopp, and Brook's relieved laughter when the sharpshooter came to. Luffy was still eating loudly enough for it to be audible, and there was soft, patient laughter from Nico Robin who was enduring Sanji's affections.
A loud belch from the woman over Zoro's shoulder reminded him which end of the stick he'd landed with.
The Nami end. Scratch that. The drunken Nami end.
The navigator was now the definition of the term 'deep in her cups'. She was rambling continuously to inanimate objects, the floor being her latest target.
"Hhhheeello, flooorr," she was saying. "I hhaven't shheeen you this c-c" She hiccupped. "Thhiss c-cloosshhee before." Of course she hadn't. Zoro made a frustrated noise in his throat. Since she always ordered someone else to swab the deck, no wonder she hadn't- She slid from his grip and crashed to the deck, giggling madly. She began patting the floor with a limp hand.
Zoro sent a look skyward and then turned, his eyes widening when he saw Nami's pink tongue taking swift passage toward to wooden deck. He grabbed her under her armpits and yanked her out of reach of the wood.
"Silly woman," he grumbled, a little unsure of what exactly he was supposed to do with her. She began kicking her feet.
"Zorrooo..." she complained. "Put me doowwnn." He released her unceremoniously, and she miraculously landed on her feet. A cry of pain slashed the 'miraculously' from the previous sentence. She'd twisted her leg. Zoro sighed, picking her up again, bridal style this time.
"Sorry," he muttered gruffly, managing to smell her 'Nami' scent underneath the alcohol. Unlike the majority of female pirates, Nami managed to smell good all the time... not that he smelled her... or anything. She chose that moment to rest her head in the crook of his neck, one arm going round his shoulders. Zoro's heart gave a funny thump. Her hair was so soft and silky his fingers itched to sink among the orange strands, holding her head while he kissed those lips senseless. She was so close he could probably...
No.
He was a swordsman. He had stamina. He had willpower, and determination. He could resist her. He was Roronoa Zoro.
And it was at that moment that he realized he was just standing there with her in his arms.
It was also that moment in which Nami began licking his neck, sending jolts of awareness, and dare he say, pleasure tingling down his spine. His knees gave a suspicious wobble. Oh Kami...
No.
He was a swordsman, dammit. He had stamina, willpower and determination. He could resist her... he just didn't want to. But he had to. So, with that thought in mind, Zoro growled a little and flung her back over his shoulder. She gave a little shriek of inebriated surprise.
"Zorroooo..." He steeled himself for her complaints. Wrong choice. Why? Because instead of complaining, Nami began giggling, and before Zoro even had time to be confused, her small hands were grabbing at his ass and squeezing the cheeks generously. Zoro flinched, involuntarily tightening the muscles in his rear end as he tried to dance away from her hands. It was a futile endeavour, because she was flung over his shoulder and had perfect reach no matter which direction he moved his hips in. And damn it, but her hands palming him felt so good he was almost tempted to just let her... but then he wouldn't be able to stand for much longer and what the hell was he even thinking?! Luffy would have his head if he knew! Well... probably not, but... but someone would! Right?
"Woman," he growled, trying to catch her wayward hands with his free hand by twisting it behind himself. It only worked marginally, because one of her hands always seemed to be free.
"Yer butt'sssshh niiccee, Zorroo," she said over a giggle. Zoro felt heat flood his neck and cheeks. This woman! He gave up trying to catch her hands and, instead, grabbed her waist with both hands and lifted her away from him. She gave a squeal of disappointment at being deprived of his buttocks, pouting at him as he held her in front of him.
What was he to do with her? He had to get her to the woman's quarters, but it was quite a distance to go if she was going to be squeezing his ass the whole way there! There was only so much he could take. He could hold her like this and walk with her... but then he would be subjected to staring at her chest the whole way, and he couldn't take much of that either. Carrying her bridal style hadn't worked either, what with her licking his neck. Zoro sent her a baleful stare.
"Zorroo... I have a secret... wanna hear?" Nami whispered, giving him a conspiratorial smile while looking around surreptitiously. No. He did not want to hear her secret... okay fine, he did.
"What is it?" the swordsman asked, blinking at her. Nami giggled and leaned forward.
"When you scowl... it only makes y-you look hhoottt," she said, her dazed eyes still managing to twinkle mischievously. Zoro scowled at her. When her grin widened, he realized what she said and felt heat crawl up his neck. What the heck? Had she been... had she...?
"I've been..." She hiccupped. "I've been ww-watching you..." she giggled, reaching out a hand to run it through his short green hair. Zoro's eyelids drooped a little at the feeling of her nails scraping against his scalp before he snapped himself back and scowled at her again.
He set her on the floor, wincing a little at her squeal of pain as her injured ankle took her weight. He turned her around quickly and hoisted her back over his shoulder, her legs dangling over his back. There was no way those sneaky little hands would reach his ass now. Zoro managed to get to the door to the women's quarters, his hand outstretched to turn the knob, when he found himself in a new predicament.
Small hands were stroking and squeezing the package between his legs, sending waves of pleasure zinging through every inch of him. What the hell? Nami giggled. Zoro's knees trembled again. It wasn't even so much that she was doing that to him... it was that she was doing that to him. If he hadn't been secretly wondering what it would be like... with her... then this might not be so-
"Zzoorroo," she breathed, as if a secret had been revealed to her... and thankfully, interrupting his dangerous thoughts. "It's so.." He promptly let her slide to the floor, her 'oomph' cutting off the rest of her sentence. He wasn't sure what he would have done had she finished it. Zoro's face was so hot he felt a little light-headed. He eyed her warily as he tried to control his breathing and accelerated heartbeat.
"You little witch," he growled huskily, picking her up again when she began to whimper. Her arms twined around his waist as she leaned against him, and she began rubbing her cheek against the thin material covering his chest. Like a kitten. She was so beautiful...
No.
Zoro pulled himself together again, yanking the door open and almost dragging her to the women's quarters. Almost. He never quite got to actually move forward another step, because Nami's question froze every muscle in his body... save his heart... which went into overdrive.
"Zoro..." she began, her voice deceptively calm and slur-free. "Can you kiss me?"
Not really as funny as the last chapter, but what the heck! Lol! Thinking to make this a three-shot... so likely only one chapter left... which will be out much sooner, I PROMISE! Reviewww! Haha PLEHZ!
