Naruto Yorozuya
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Gintama
Chapter 2: The Road of Life… Why isn't it a Conveyor Belt?
After graduation and waiting for their teams with the rookies being on the teams only two teams were left.
"Team 7 is Sasuke Uchiha, Sakura Haruno and Mito Namikaze and your jonin sensei will be Kakashi Hakate" Iruka said which caused the Uchiha and Namikaze heads to hit the table, Naruto would feel sorry but he doesn't. "And finally Team Six is Naruto Namikaze, Hanabi Hyuga and Ayame Sarutobi your jonin is... Anko Mitarashi" Iruka said the name with a bit of unease.
"Ah looks like it's going to introduce a few characters from the other universe" Naruto said to himself as those around him somehow didn't hear him break the fourth wall. "What a coincidence that old man Hiruzen and Ayame have the same last name!"
Suddenly the window crashed and smokescreen appears causing everyone to cough and tries waving away the smoke with their hand. Eventually the smoke passed and there was a sign that said "TEAM SIX JONIN SENSEI: THE SEXY AND SINGLE ANKO MITARASHI" and under that "TEAM SEVEN JONIN SENSEI: ALWAYS LATE AND PERVERT KAKASHI HATAKE" … except it didn't say that Kakashi was a pervert or all ways late.
"Nii-san did you really have to read the sign out loud?" Mito asked her twin.
"Yes" They saw Kakashi standing there reading his smut holding a sign saying "Help me! She is threating my precious Icha Icha collection!" Naruto read the sign out loud… again. Anko had an eye twitch before directing Team Six and Team Seven to the roof.
Kakashi made everyone introduced their selves with him giving no information but his name.
"My name is Mito Namikaze, I like Ramen, my family. I dislike pervs, rapists and arrogant people. I don't really have any hobbies and my dream is to become stronger than my parents" Mito said with determination.
Sakura really said nothing as it was all Sasuke… poor guy.
"My name is Sasuke Uchiha, I like tomatoes, my mother and brother, I dislike certain people. My hobbies are training and my dream is to surpass my brother" The TOTALLY-NOT REVENGE DRIVEN Uchiha said as his family wasn't actually wiped out but still.
"My name is Hanabi Hyuga, I like my friends, Naruto-kun, my family. I dislike the bird-cage seal, and the same as what Mito said, my hobbies are training in the Gentle Fist and making new combinations and variations from it, my dream… I guess is to start a family"
Ayame Sarutobi went next leaving out her 'likes' and had the same dislikes as the Mito and Hanabi. Finally it was our hero's turn.
"My name is Gintoki Sakata…" Naruto got hit up the side of the head by Mito. "My name is Naruto Namikaze, I like ramen, dangos, strawberry milk, parfaits especially chocolate parfaits, and I also like my family and friends, Yorozuya along with breaking the fourth wall" Naruto said as everyone looked at him oddly. Naruto sighed and pulled out a card showing Naruto's name and the word Yorozuya and gave it to Kakashi "My business card now where was I oh yeah. I dislike a lot of things to be honest. My hobbies are varied and my dreams come to me at night" Making every comically fall over. Anko went over her likes for dango, snakes and a dream to kill a white snake.
"Now on the genin test" as everyone nodded except for Sakura. Kakashi explained the test to Sakura since she was from a civilian family.
"Ah sensei why are two teams here?" Sakura asked which all the other genin except Naruto nodded in agreement.
"Well you see this is actually a dual team test, team 8 and 10 are also doing this together as well" Kakashi told her. When that was out of the way they went to start their test.
"Team 7 will be after these bells" Kakashi said.
"Team 6 will be doing a survival course" Anko said with a large toothy grin. The genin saw Kakashi shiver for a spilt second making team 7 feel sorry for team 6.
Somewhere in the Forest of Death ore in Naruto's words "The Forest of Devouring Life" Naruto said randomly as they saw the sign.
"Devouring Life?" Anko asked her laziest genin. Naruto sighed and spoke again.
"The trees are alive yet there are dangerous plants and animals that will kill and eat you, most likely when you're still alive" Anko had to admit, it was kind of fitting.
Team Six had to survive the traps, animals and get to Anko before a time limit. Team Six managed to too spot out traps and dodge any dangerous threats; Naruto looked at one trap he knew for some reason. Naruto had to admit Ayame was a good help but she also wasn't easy to get along with so being a genius Naruto kicked Ayame into a trap… which was bad for him watching her get wrapped up as she blushed.
"So…so…sadistic~" Ayame said after getting out went back to Naruto who he hit to get her away as "Naruto-sama~"
"S-Stop IT!"
"So cold~ So sadistic~ So perfect"
"Ah! She thinks I'm a sadist!" Naruto yelled as he ran towards Anko with Hanabi and a Masochistic Ayame. When they met up with Anko they went to go watch Team Seven's failing… since it just started due to Kakashi 'preparing' …for two hours.
Naruto noticed that Kakashi was to into his Icha Icha than his own team so he decided to punish him. "HAHAHAHA!" Came the laughter of Anko when the rest of the genin came to look they all saw Kakashi with his hair in a perm instead of defying gravity.
"Don't worry Permy-sensei, your permanent perm will go back to normal next chapter" Naruto said getting odd looks from those around him, almost as if he was the only one who truly know what was going on.
"Well we have to go report to the hokage about you all passing" Kakashi and Anko both left while Naruto turned to see Ayame stripping him with her eyes. Both Team 7 and Hanabi saw the red faced Ayame look of perversion.
"That's what you look like when looking/staring/drooling at Sasuke/me Sakura/Haruno" Hanabi, Sasuke and Mito said together. Suddenly Naruto lashed out surprising the other genin except Ayame. They could've sworn she looked even happier. Naruto punched her away from him!
"Stop stripping me with your eyes!" Naruto yelled as he left.
"Are you okay Ayame? He shouldn't have done that" Mito said as the genin were concerned except for Hanabi.
"3…2…1…" Hanabi said as the genin were confused until Ayame reacted to the punch.
She put her hand to her cheek with a blush and a lustful look in her eyes. "Naruto-sama, please bully me some more~" this caused all remaining genin to gasp.
"She's…she's…" Sakura started.
"A masochist? Yeah… she is" Hanabi sighed out. The long haired Hyuga gave the Sarutobi a menacing look. Ayame still in dream land gave a happy look back but both had the same meaning. "He. IS. MINE!"
MEANWHILE WITH THE JONIN
"HAHAHAHA Ka-Kakashi what on earth HAHAHA Happened to your hair!" Minato laughed as well as the other jonin. Kakashi looked up lazily from his book and stared at his sensei.
"Naruto happened" What Kakashi said was enough to quiet the room.
"Is it going to stay like that?" Asuma asked his fellow jonin.
"No hopefully not, Naruto said it will go away next chapter whatever that means" They thought about Naruto being insane before Hiruzen spoke up.
"Ah I see, Naruto broke the fourth wall yet again"
"Oh god it's spreading!" was the thought of everyone in the room. Minato now scared of how Naruto turned the Sandaime into a senile old man but Minato had to ask what exactly the Fourth Wall was.
"What is the 'Fourth Wall'?"
"The Fourth Wall is nothing to joke about, it is actually quite dangerous. Naruto knows about the Fourth Wall probably due to an early 'Plot Hole' in the beginning of his life Naruto gained 'awareness' of the Fourth Wall's presence. Along with 'Plot Device' Naruto could easily erase this universe… unless the 'FanFiction' stays up then no but it could be taken down…"
"W-what? Our universe!" Everyone yelled.
"Can you please explain more and about this Plot Device? Also how do you know this?" Minato asked.
"Naruto told me thru a 'Flashback'. Anyways with Plot Device Naruto can get stronger or any other benefits for absolutely nothing at all" Hiruzen said calmly and casually, this was when the jaw dropped. "Using it he could become literally god if he wanted to"
"T-then why isn't he?" Kurenai asked.
"All yeah I have the best genin ever!" Anko was quite happy about that.
"Because Naruto said the readers don't like reading about an already overpowered character unless the god-like entity lost his power or if it was a character currently stronger than the protagonist"
"Readers? Wait if you know about this can you use it?" Minato asked seriously.
"Nope only Naruto can use its powers due to the Author" The monkey replied.
"Author, Readers, FanFiction… Flashback, Plot Device, Plot Hole, Awareness, Fourth Wall… what happened Naruto… wait Hiruzen said something about a 'Plot Hole' in his past! Is it our fault for neglecting him to train Mito?" Minato thought.
"Ah Minato the Plot Hole was actually you and Kushina living when you were supposed to die, you know Reaper Deal Seal, Kyuubi extraction?" Hiruzen said breaking into Minato's thinking monologue but Minato didn't hear him.
"I will fix our bonds! Also knowing Danzo, he would want that power, but good thing he will think it is random nonsense" He declared in his mind.
…
Minato got the title 'Slightly Aware'
…
Minato's eye twitched for a second before they both widened and he shouted "OH GOD ITS SPREADING!"
