In an ominously dark room somewhere, a man wearing cool dark shades and a cool dark suit and looking like a badass hung up a phone. Exiting the room where the phone was held for private conversation, the man walked through the hallways of this building and entered a very large room inhabited by a very important individual. This large room was very impressively decorated, as if it were a dwelling place for a king, and in the center of the room, up a couple of steps, was a throne in which sat President of Nintendo of America, Reggie Fils-Aime.
"Why have you come to see me?," Reggie asked in a booming, manly voice. "I-I called Little Mac, sir," the man explained. "Ah, is that so," Reggie muttered, slouching in his chair with his elbow on the left handle and his fist on his cheek, "What did he say?" "W-well… he…," the man stammered. "Get on with it," Reggie ordered. "He told me to fuck off, sir," the man revealed. Reggie gave off a guttural "Hmm…" After a moment of silence, he finally said, "Well, we can't have that now, can we." He focused on his visitor. "Thank you for this piece of information." "Can I go now?," he asked.
Reggie gestured for a couple of his minions, standing in the corners of the room, to come forward. They did so, and stopped on either side of the man. Reggie pointed to the left minion, and then to the man. In one swift movement, the minion snapped the man's neck, and he fell to the ground. "Now," Reggie began, "See if you two can get our client to… change his mind." The two minions nodded, and they headed towards the exit to begin their mission. Holy shit guys, I wonder what's going to happen.
MEANWHILE
It was a really sunny morning in some suburban town somewhere like wow, it was pretty much perfect the skies were blue and the sun was out and the grass was green and it was a nice shade of green it wasn't like a shitty shade of green like rabbit shit green, nah bruh, this was really nice, bright and shiny green. And in this suburban town was a house, because houses are in towns, and in one of those houses were a few people, because people live in houses. And in one particular house in this particular town were two particular people, Doc Louis and Little Mac. You may remember them if you read the previous installment in the series, and if you didn't, then what the fuck is wrong with you smh
So Doc Louis and Little Mac were sitting in the kitchen this fine morning, enjoying breakfast with their children. Just a couple of years ago, this inseparable couple had hated each other's guts in the decades following an intense court case over the custody of their older child, but after they reunited in a gentlemanly pub, their love was rekindled and proof of that true love was brought into the world in the form of their latest son, whom they had been diligently raising for the past few months.
Doc was doing that thing where he tried to spoon-feed the baby by making weird faces with his mouth and the baby spit out a little bit of food on its bib with each intake and Mac was reading a newspaper and their daughter was looking at something on her phone. This daughter hasn't been assigned a name yet so let's give her the name Mackenzie. Get it cuz Mackenzie and she's the daughter of a guy named Mac and this is the most clever thing ever oh my god
and I don't know what to name the baby but it doesn't matter cuz he does fuck all in this fic anyway
So Mac was like "Hey Mack, shouldn't you put your phone away and spend some quality time with your family?" And Mack was like, "No, I don't even want to see your faces." "Mack, are you sttill upset about that time when you found out that me and your father were back together?," Mac asked. Mack put her phone down for a bit, "Yes I am! You guys were fucking in the closet of a tavern, you don't understand how traumatizing it was for me to see that," she yelled. "Mack, we already gave you the talk, there's nothing bad about sex or wanting to screw people," Mac explained. "It's not about the screwing, it's just-ugh, you guys don't understand, I hate you," Mack complained, sinking her face back into her phone again. "Mack, you're being so stubborn, D-Doc, can you talk some sense into your daughter please?," Mac requested.
"Om nom nom om nom nom," Doc said while doing those faces again. "Doc, stop being weird and help raise your child," Mac ordered. "Don't be rude," Doc retorted, "And I am helping raise our child, you see the lengths I'm going through to get him to eat." "Not that child, this child, the one you've been neglecting ever since that little fucker came into this family," Mack whined. "Watch your language, young lady," Mac instructed. "Mack, honey, we only had this baby so he'd bring some joy into your life," Doc said. "And he already has, I assure you," Mac replied. "No, not you Mac, I meant Mack," Doc clarified. "Really? Oh wow, that's going to cause a lot of confusion," Mac pointed out. "Hey, you're the one who chose the name," Doc reminded. "Well, don't let me name anything else, I worked at Nintendo for a bunch of years so of course I picked up some traits from them," Mac explained. "Stop it with the sly commentary on the Japanese video game industry guys, it's not charming," Mack complained.
"Look Mack, the point is, we just want to help make your life as happy as it can be, but we can't do that if you won't communicate with us," Mac explained. "I-I don't want to talk about it," Mack refused, "My bus is here, I gotta go." She hoisted her backpack onto her back and rushed out the front door. "Mack, wait-," Mac called out, but he was too late. "Ugh, what are we going to do with her?," he muttered to himself. "I wouldn't sweat it," Doc replied, "She's a teenager now, she's got hormones and stuff. It'll be over by the time she's 20 or so." "But I don't want to wait until she's 20. I missed out on over a decade of her life. She's about two-thirds of the way to adulthood now, and there's such little time left for me to spend with her. I don't want it to be wasted because she's being a li'l bitch," Mac complained. "Aw, you poor thing," Doc soothed Mac, patting him on the back. "Tell you what: I just used up six containers of baby food trying to feed our child one serving and there's a huge mess here, so how about I clean it up, you put him to bed, and then afterward we do some lovin'." "You know just how to cheer me up," Mac replied with a smile on his face, and pecked Doc on the lips.
Doc took the baby's food-stained bib off of him and handed the baby over to Mac. As Doc began cleaning up the premises, Mac carried the now-sleeping infant up to his room and placed him down in his crib. "I won't miss out on a single second of yours," Mac whispered to his son as he covered him in an adorable teeny blanket and shut the door.
A short while later, Doc and Mac were passionately making out in their room. They stepped back and forth throughout its diameter, sucking each other's faces with fervor. They landed on their bed; Doc withdrew from Mac's lips for a bit and began spitting into his mouth, which Mac swallowed happily. Doc continued spitting all over Mac's face; Mac scooped up the saliva with his palm and deposited them into his mouth before hungrily pulling Doc back onto him and continuing to assault his oral cavity. Mac began pulling at Doc's shirt and soon enough was able to rip it in half, exposing Doc's chubby but nonetheless very arousing and manly chest. Doc did the same to him, and as they continued making out whilst topless they began pulling at the garments below their waist as well, hastily removing them to get to the main dish of this five-course meal.
After they were nude, Mac grabbed all of their clothes and chucked them out of a nearby window, a feat one would normally view as rather stupid, but in this case, as he was really fucking horny, it seemed like a wise thing to do to make their engagement more lascivious and naughty. He then spread Doc's asschecks wide open and began fervently licking at his butthole like insert simile here.
After moistening his lover's anus, Mac began to pound his backside with his very long, foreign and Italian wiener when a car pulled into their driveway. Two unknown persons stepped out of it - one could note this duo looked kind of like the minions that Reggie dispatched in the prologue. Pulling weapons out of the vehicle with them, they charged towards the front door and kicked it down, barging into the house. "PUT YOUR HANDS UP WHERE WE CAN SEE THEM!," they screamed. Upstairs, Doc and Mac froze mid-coitus. "Who the fuck is th-?," Doc began, but he was cut off from the sound of gunfire below. "We know you're here, Little Mac, come willingly and we won't hurt you!" They stayed silent for a few more seconds, hoping that these madmen would soon find their way out, but after a few really tense moments, one of the guys said "They're not on this floor, let's check upstairs." And Mac had a little bit of shit in his pants. Given that an additional smell that was now filling the room, he assumed that he wasn't the only one. Also they weren't wearing any pants.
Mac pulled his dick out of Doc and ran over to the window he had thrown the clothes out of, opening it back up. He climbed out of it and onto the roof of the house. "Come on Doc, we gotta get out of here," Mac whispered. As he scampered down the side of their home, he noticed that Doc's fat, plump ass was stuck in the window. "I-I can't get out! Help!," Doc scream-whispered back. "Come on, Doc, push! Push as hard as you can!," he instructed his coach in an interesting reversal of roles. "I'm trying, I'm trying!," he replied. By now, the two men were up on the first floor and were barging into random rooms looking for their target. They entered the baby's department, and he started crying loud as shit. Doc's maternal instinct kicked in, and he began pushing himself back into the room. "Doc, no, what are you doing?!," Mac screeched. "I've got to go back in for the baby!," Doc explained. "We don't have time, we have to save ourselves!," Mac shouted. "We can't just leave our child!," Doc refused. "Yes we can!," Mac retorted. He jumped up and grabbed onto Doc's flabby arms. Mac's added weight made Doc too much for the window to hold onto, and it broke off of the wall, causing our heroes to fall down onto the pavement.
Fortunately, Doc's girth saved the two of them from incurring any injuries. Mac picked up their clothes which lay on the nearby lawn, grabbed Doc's arm, and ran towards their car. Ripping the doors open, the two piled in and shut them behind them. The car's alarm went off, and the two men knew to rush into Doc and Mac's room. Mac rummaged through his pants for the car keys and found them just in the nick of time. The minions got to the window of the room - well, where the window used to be, now it was just around Doc's waist - and began to fire down on the car just as Mac rushed to back out of the driveway. The windshield shattered, but that was all the villains were able to accomplish before Doc and Mac made their getaway on the road, in the nude.
MEANWHILE
At school Mackenzie was at lunch, sitting at a table alone, being a fucking loner. She dove into the crappy school lunch, which was week-old frozen pizza - it probably wasn't a week old, but it tasted like it to Mack - and was surprised when she saw another student coming her way. She had short hair, glasses, earrings hanging from each ear, she looked like a kind of hipster nerd. Taking a seat right next to Mack, she introduced herself. "Hi, I'm Annie, I notice you sit by yourself all of the time."
"Yeah, I do," Mack replied, taking another bite. "Why's that?," she asked. "I'm not much of a people person," she explained. "Really? 'cuz when all of the kids talk about you, they say that you were a really out-going chick a couple of grades ago," she explained. "They do? Why would they talk about me?," Mack muttered. "There isn't anybody that kids don't talk about. We're in middle school, nobody's spared," said Annie. Mack chuckled a bit. "Huh, is that right?" "Yep, it totally is. So, I'm new to the school this year, and I don't have any preconceived notions about you, therefore the kids at the other table thought I was the best candidate to chat with you," she told.
Mack frowned a bit more, as if that was even possible given how much she frowned already. "So you didn't want to talk to me yourself? You just did what others told you to do?," she asked. "Well hey, I would've turned you down if I didn't want to talk to you. Come on, Mack is it? I want to get to know you better," she explained. "Nah, you don't want to get to know me," Mack refused. "Sure I do. Starting with the life-traumatizing event that caused a 180 on your personality… Please?," she begged. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you," Mack replied.
"Alright then. Let's start with some simpler stuff. What's your favorite color?," Annie asked. "Red," Mack answered. "Really? Red's my favorite color!," Annie replied. "That's cool," Mack said, opening up ever so slightly. "Kay kay, now you ask me one now," Annie suggested. "Um… okay, but like… what category?," Mack asked. "Anything you like," Annie offered. "A'ight… what's your favorite band?," she inquired. "Ooh, definitely Generic Death Metal Band," Annie answered. Mack's eyes lit up. "Really?! Generic Death Metal Band's my favorite too!" She then tuned down her excitement for fear it would turn her new acquaintance off. "Er, I mean, you don't seem like the kind of person who'd listen to Generic Death Metal Band. I mean, there's death metal, and then there's General Death Metal Band death metal, which is pretty fucking extreme," he noted. "Are you kidding? Bruh, no one could ever resist their allure, especially after hearing the things they can do with instruments," she explained. "oh my gawwwwwd yesssss," Mack agreed.
And the two hit it off, becoming the best of buddies by the end of the day. In truth, this wasn't anything out of the ordinary for Annie, who could bond with anybody easily thanks to her bubbly personality, but it was a major thing to Mack, who for quite some time now had been really socially awkward and desperately wanting social attention, as much as it seemed to bystanders that she didn't. Perhaps, most importantly, she now had someone to text.
So, it came as quite a shock when she walked home from school - why didn't she take the bus home? who really knows? - and came to her house and saw that the front was busted upon what the FUCK
And then she went inside and saw that the walls were all blasted up and shit what the hell even happened in here and then she went upstairs and saw the HUGE FUCKING HOLE in her parents' room where a fat fucking chunk had been taken out and she was like "what went on here omg where are my parents im gonna cry omfg" and she probably would've had a mental breakdown or something if she hadn't heard her baby brother crying. She rushed to the aid of this "little fucker" as she had called him before, cradling him in his arms. Before, she would've thought of him as nothing but a nuisance that sobs and poops, but now, in the wake of this disaster with her caretakers missing, she saw him as the only family member she had left, and someone she now had to protect, and perhaps love, until the crisis was solved.
MEANWHILE Doc and Louis were driving on the road and they were still nude. They hadn't had the courage to put their clothes back on cuz 1.) Mac was driving and he couldn't anyway distracted driving is fucking terrible and 2.) they were still legit shook from being hunted down. At last, Doc finally decided to speak up: "Who the hell were those guys and why were they after us?" "I have no idea. We have to get to the bottom of this," Mac suggested. "Alright, but how are we going to do that? Turn back around and confront them?," Doc asked. "No way, you got a fucking death wish?," he said in his still-sexy half-Italian half-New York-ish accent cuz he was an Italian American from the Bronx. "We're just gonna keep going until the plot advances."
MEANWHILE the two minions from before had returned to that mysterious building. They entered Reggie's throne room once again, ready to give him the news. "Did you capture Little Mac?," Reggie asked, only now, he had a bit of fear in his voice, unlike before when he was firm and harsh when initially telling them their objectives. "N-no sir, he and his bae escaped before we could apprehend them," one of the minions explained. "Jesus tittyfucking Christ," Reggie proclaimed in his seductive executive accent. He took an assertive tone, but one could still see that he was worried about something. "Listen here you sons of bitches, you remember what I had you do to that one NPC? I'll have two other minions do that to you if you don't succeed in your mission," Reggie threatened. "You wouldn't do that," the other minion spoke up, "We're too valuable to the organization. The higher-ups would never let you get rid of us."
Reggie stood up from his chair. He pounded his fists together. "Do you know why I was chosen for this position? Because I kick ass, and I take names. Do you want to see how I kick ass?!," Reggie shouted. "N-no sir," the other minion whimpered. "Good. Now get out of here." The two minions dashed out of the room, and once the doors shut behind them, Reggie pulled out a cigar and lit that shit up. After blowing out a puff of smoke, he rubbed his temple. "What am I going to do now…?" As he contemplated stuff, another individual burst into the room with some grave news. "Sir… he's on the phone for you…," this individual stated. Reggie's heart stopped. Was it who he thought it was? "He…?," Reggie asked. "He," the individual confirmed. Reggie gulped.
Walking through the hallway, Reggie entered the private phone room and spoke into the receiver. "... Hellio?"
"こんにちは、私は任天堂社長岩田聡です。私はあなたに直接電話を入れて規定しています。あなたのレジー性交。新しいビデオゲームでリトルマックを取得するには、一つの仕事を持っていた、あなたが失敗している。あなたがその頑固なディックが戻ることに同意するものとしてもらうことのために、私は十分な長待っていたが、あなたはあまりにも時間がかかっている*," said the guy on the other line.
"P-please, Iwata-senpai, I just need more time!," Reggie begged, tears flowing from his eyes.
"私はあなたの愚かな外国人あなたに十分な時間を与えている。あなたが最後のチャンスを持っている。その後、私は私の手に掲げる事項がかかります。**," he concluded, and hung up.
Reggie laid down on the floor, sobbing quietly.
* Roughly translated: "Hello, I am Nintendo President Satoru Iwata. I am putting forth this phone call directly to you. Fuck you Reggie-kun. You haddu oneu jobbu, to get Little Mac-san in the new video game and you have failedu. I have waited longgu enoughu for you to get that stubborn dickku to agree to return but you have taken too long."
**Roughly translated: "I have givingu you enough time you baka gaijin. You have one last chance. Afterward, I will take matters into my hands."
MEANWHILE Mackenzie was at her house and called the police because this was a pretty important emergency. "This is 911, how can we help you?," the operator asked. "Okay, okay, listen, I came back from school and I found my house broken into. The door was knocked down, there are bullet holes in the wall, and my parents are gone holy sh-" "Wait, this voice sounds familiar, have you called before?," the operator inquired. "Y-yeah, I have," she replies, "But that's inconsequential to my current dilemn-" "Hold on for a second,, let us check something," the operator interrupted. Mack was put on hold. "Never Gonna Give You Up" played for about a minute. Mack found herself jamming to it for a bit.
The operator came back. "Yeah, you've dialed this number about twenty times before. And all of those times you said you were heavily depressed, had a knife to your throat, and were calling us in a desperate plea to get you some help." "Yeah, well, that was in a past phase," she explained. 'Well we've had enough of your prank calls, missy," the operator replied. "What? Those weren't prank calls, I was legit fucking depressed, I wanted to kill myself. And right now I'm alone in my house with a baby and there are some goddamn criminals around here blowing shit-" The operator hung up.
Pissed, Mackenzie texted Annie saying "bruh i'm done with the police fuckin smh" followed by a cluster of disgruntled emojis. Annie then texted her back saying "aww cheer up boo" and then sent a link to a funny cat video. Mack texted her back as well, now saying "LOL i'm weak," with some laughing emojis. And then Annie texted her saying "you tryna stay over at my house for the night?" And then Mack texted her back saying "yeah we gonna turn uhhh?" and then Annie texted her back in return saying "bruh im already turnt" and it went back and forth like this for an hourOH MY GOD
So Mack and the baby went over to Annie's house and Annie's parents were away so they just chilled for a bit I guess wait I wonder if I can insert a lesbian angle into this fic would it be awkward since they're 13 like is that illegal idkkkkkkk
MEANWHILE Mac and Doc finally recovered enough to stop their car by a hotel. Putting their clothes on, they entered the building and rented a room. After getting their keys, they went and locked themselves in their room, determined to stay for a few days until the whole thing blew over and those mysterious figures were out of their hair. Oh and they got horny so they screwed I guess
"OH MY GOD YESSSS DOC, FUCK ME!," Mac screamed, "FUCK ME AND CUM IN MY TIGHT BUTTHOLE MMMMMMM" "DOC? DOC?! DO I LOOK LIKE A FUCKING DOCTOR TO YOU BOY DO I HAVE A DOCTORATE IN SOME SUBJECT IN THE MEDICAL FIELD BOYYYYY!?," Doc screamed. He stopped fucking Mac for a bit. "No no no, keep pounding me pleaseeee it feels so gooddddd~~~," Mac cried. "I FUCKING SAID DO I HAVE A FUCKING DOCTORATE, BOY!," Doc yelled. "NO YOU DON'T," Mac replied. "WHAT DID I MAJOR INNNN BOYYYYYYYY," Doc screamed. "YOU MAJOREDDDD INNNNNN COAAAAAAAAACHINGGGGGGGG," Mac cried as Doc continued pounding him. "AH! AH! AH!," Mac let out bursts of pure joy. "SO WHAT DO YOU SAYYYYYY?!," Doc asked. "OH MY GOD YESSS COACHHHHHHH" "LOUDERRRRR!" "OH MY GODDD YESSSSS COACHHHHHH!" "I'M NOT GONNA FILL YOU WITH MY SPERM IF YOU KEEP SAYING IT LIKE A LITTLE PUSSY BITCH!" "HOLY JESUS FUCKING CHRIST-!"
A group of fellow hotel dwellers pounded on the door. "Shut up in there!," "We don't need to hear your gross love making!", "Keep it down!," were the cries of the individuals. "Huh?," stammered Doc, who was pulled out of the zone. That wasn't the only thing that was pulled out - so was his peepee. It ejaculated all over Mac's back, dowsing his spine in that hot, sticky substance. "Mmm," moaned Mac, who probably unleashed his own load upon the sheets. "Sorry about that honey," Doc said, and proceeded to lick his own semen off of Mac.
As he did so, the sexual rush of the activity wore off and not only did Doc wonder why the hell he was lapping up his own cum, he also finally thought about the well-being of his offspring. "Mac, we just abandoned our children, did you know that?," Doc asked. "I know, it's been eating away at me too. But I'm sure they're fine. Mack's old enough to take care of herself and I'm sure she's looking after the baby," Mac reassured. "But what about those two guys? What if they go after them?," Doc asked. "They were only after me. You didn't even have to run away with me, you could've technically stayed behind and still have been safe," Mac pointed out. "Oh, but I would never leave you," Doc said in a really sweet voice. "Aww," Mac replied, and kissed him. "Oh, you still have some cum on your lips," he pointed out, and licked his own. "Wow, it tastes really sweet. You been eatin' fruit lately?," Mac asked. "Yep," Doc replied, "Lots of watermelon."
MEANWHILE holy shit wow that was fucking terrible im sorry
omg
MEANWHILE Mack and Annie were still in Annie's house from like five paragraphs ago (seven if you include my interjections there) and the baby was starting to cry. "Oh no, he's crying," Mack moaned, "What do we do?" "What do you mean, what do we do, aren't you his older sister? You should know how to deal with him," Annie explained, taking the baby in her own arms and rocking him gently. "Well, I haven't wanted much to do with him at all really," Mack revealed. "Really? There are tons of kids around the world who would love to be in your position, to have a cute little baby brother like you do," Annie said, "You ought to cherish and make the most of your sibling connection."
"Eh, I don't know, I feel like I'd make a pretty shitty sibling anyway," Mack whined. "Well, you won't know until you try," Annie pointed out, and gave the baby to her friend. Mack looked down at this bundle of joy, at her own flesh and blood. In that moment, the baby stopped crying, and looked up at his sister. He giggled. And she smiled back in return. Heartwarming music played in the background. "We're doing it… we're bonding," Mack proclaimed triumphantly. Then she took a whiff of the air. Record scratch, the baby had shitted itself. The little thing wasn't smiling because he was spending quality time with his sister, it was because it had relieved himself of the waste inside his body and had deposited a good dump in his diaper.
Well, you can choose to believe he smiled because of the bonding, I mean, I won't judge.
In a montage, Mack and Annie took the baby's stinky diaper off, pampered him up with some old baby supplies Annie's parents still had from when she was an infant like some fucking decade-old baby powder probably made his ass stale as shit but they didn't know any better, they were teenagers. And then Annie ran to the nearby store while Mack stayed at the house and played peek-a-boo with her brother. Annie came back with some diapers and wipes and a couple of containers of baby food. And so they dressed him up again and began to feed him. The baby didn't eat the food correctly cuz it was a baby, y'know, like a few months old doesn't know nothin', so Annie told Mack she had to make the weird faces to get the baby to eat and so Mack made the funny faces and then she realized that not only did that have a practical application, but she also had renewed respect for her father because of it. And this all went on to some music, preferably 80s music, like really funky 80s music.
MEANWHILE those two minions from before were looking for where Mac could've gone and so they tapped into some really secretive stuff like Mac's credit card history cuz they were a really shady organization who could do stuff like that and so they checked it and they saw that he checked into a hotel like an hour ago and holy shit they knew where to find him now this is getting really interesting
MEANWHILE it was in the middle of the night like probably three fucking thirty AM like the time the narrator is writing this story and Mac and Doc had fallen asleep on each other and they were snoring and stuff and then WHAT THE FUCK the two minions burst into their room with their weapons and pointed them at them and then shouted for them to get up and put their hands up. And Doc and Mac were legit shook for a moment but then their fight-or-flight mechanism kicked in and they decided to whoop ass so they lunged forward towards the two minions to try to fight back.
They succeeded in pushing back a minion each, and when those minions fell down, the hoods on their heads fell off, revealing their identities. Mac and Doc gasped. These two minions… they were Mario and Link of the Super Mario and The Legend of Zelda franchises respectively!
Little Mac and Doc Louis shut the door after pushing them out into the hallway and locked it behind them. Mac grasped his head and muttered to himself, "This can't be happening, this can't be happening…" "What is it, Mac?," Doc asked, "Who are those guys?" "What, you don't remember them? Right, you've always just been as assist trophy, not a playable character, so you probably never met up with them. That's Mario and Link, they're part of the Smash Bros. games' rosters. Been in every one," he explained. "Oh, so they're your friends then?," Doc asked. "No. They're extremely loyal and basically slaves to Nintendo, that corporation churns out like ten games with them in them every year. Makes sense that they'd be hired to do their dirty work," Mac muttered to himself.
"So wait, what exactly is going on here?," Doc inquired, a bit confused. "Nintendo's after me. They want me in the new Smash Bros. and they'll do anything they can to get me in it," Mac explained. "Well, they wouldn't hurt you, would they? I mean, they'd need you in good condition to add you to the roster," Doc pointed out. "Not necessarily. They just need me ali-LOOK OUT!" Mac and Doc dove to the floor as a missile hit the window, causing that whole side of the room to blow up and debris and dust to fly everywhere. Barely conscious, Mac saw a helicopter floating by the whole hole in the wall and several individuals climbing down a rope ladder from that copter and into the room. One of those individuals, he made out before he blacked out, was Reggie.
When he woke up, Mac found himself in a strange room in a mysterious building. He looked around him; indeed, he was chained to the wall, and on either side of him was his beloved, Doc Louis, and surprisingly, his daughter, Mackenzie, and some other girl around Mack's age that Mac had never met before. As he continued to survey his surroundings, he heard a voice entering the room. "I see you're finally awake." A seductive, executive voice.
Reggie walked up to Mac and, because Mac was chained to the wall, could do anything he wanted to him. At the moment, he just chose to take Mac's chin in his hand. "We've gone through a lot of trouble for you, Mac, you have no idea. Everyone here at Nintendo has been worried sick about you," he explained, "It wasn't very nice of you to blow us off so many times." Reggie backed up, and was soon joined by Mario and Link at his side. The two of them pulled out handguns. "I'll make it simple for you, Mac,, all you have to do is join the Smash Bros. roster again. That's all you've had to do, all this time," he explained.
Mario and Link cocked their guns.
"But… if you don't… your husband and your daughter's heads get blown off." Mac gasped in shock. "It's an easy decision, Mac, just choose the one where everyone wins," Reggie coaxed. Mac thought deeply. He couldn't go back to Smash Bros…. he couldn't relive the horrors there. But that the same time, he couldn't let the individuals he loved most in the world die.
"Now you wouldn't want your family's last memories to be of you getting knocked by a missile blast, would you…?," Reggie asked, motioning towards Doc. "Or of yelling for help and receiving none, of crying for her parents to help but for them to deny her in her hour of need, of being beaten into submission and then smacked against the wall and being knocked out?," Reggie questioned again, this time motioning towards Mack. Mac took another good look at her. This time, he saw her bruises, more profoundly than he did before. His sweet, beautiful Mack. He remembered his last encounter with her, when they argued. His eyes welled up with tears. He couldn't let that be the last conversation they shared. He couldn't. Not arguing over…
Mac's eyes widened. He glared at Reggie. "Where's my son?," Mac asked in a gruff tone. "Only I can ask questions here," Reggie corrected. "I said, where, the hell, is my son?!," Mac asked, shouting this time. "It's a simple yes or no question. Will you join, or won't you?," Reggie reiterated. "I'm not saying anything until you give me my son back!," Mac growled. Reggie stepped forward and slapped Mac as hard as he could across the face. "Listen here you little fucker, you don't make the decisions around here, I do. YOU don't win, NINTENDO does. And if you don't answer correctly, then God help me, I will make sure you see the light go out of their eyes and their blood gushing onto the floor as I pierce their bodies with a million bullets," Reggie growled. In response, Mac spat on his face.
Reggie staggered backwards, bewildered. "You know what, screw this," he muttered to himself. "Chain him up and take him to the rehabilitation chamber. If he won't come willingly, we'll make him," he ordered. Mario and Link removed Mac from the wall and, after putting the proper restraints on him, began to carry him out of the room.
As they moved, a gunshot sounded from above.
Mario and Link turned around and looked down, seeing Reggie's lifeless body on the ground. Before they knew it, a hooded man came down from the ceiling, and in a short flurry of punches and kicks, had them knocked out on the floor. The man reached in his pocket for a walkie-talkie and spoke into it, "Alright, time to bring 'er down!"
A large, futuristic-looking floating ship crashed through the ceiling and hung in the air, sending down a rope ladder for the man, Mac, and the others to climb upon. "Come on, old timer, we don't want the higher-ups to catch up with us, do we?," the man asked. He took Mac's arm and moved towards the rope ladder, but Mac stayed back. "Wait, we can't go yet," Mac refused, "I have to find my son!" "I wouldn't worry about that, Marlin, you see…"
The man pulled his hood down, revealing the baby's face, except obviously aged by about twenty years.
"... I AM your son."
Mac was LEGIT FUCKING SHOOK.
A few other personnel had since dropped from the copter and were now freeing the others and bringing them back up into the copter. After the deed was done, the whole gang made their escape in the craft. On the ride to some secret location, Future The Baby noticed that his father's mouth was still wide open. "Well, you're gonna have to get over this soon," he said, "Because the biggest fight of your life is about to begin. And it ain't no boxing match."
MEANWHILE in Japan, Iwata sat in his office when one of his servants entered the room. "Whattu do you wanntu?," Iwata spoke in clear Engrish. "The foolish American… he has failed," the servant announced. A huge-ass grin spread across Iwata's face. "I told you this would happengu…," he whispered.
The camera panned over a Japanese village, where legions of thousands of Nintendo Ninjas hid on each roof in darkness, ready to move out.
"... all we had to do… was leave luck to heaven."
END OF BOOK TWO
