Is it natural to feel this shitty and not be half as drunk than you'd wish to be? But the problem is.....I don't know why I feel this badly! I mean...I have good friends....I have a grade A personality.....and the guy I've been in love with for some time is finally done with his slut of a girlfriend. So, shouldn't I feel great?
Sadly, I don't. But that isn't really like me. I'm the one that's always happy...no matter what. Drunk ol' Two-Bit....the guy that always got some dumb blonde drunkies to go home with me....never has a care in the world.
But....you can't be happy ALL the time! Even I can't! Hmm....maybe it's because of Dally. He may be done with that whore Sylvia, but what makes me think he'd ever think to give me a second look?
I seriously doubt he's gay or even half.....so why would he give me a second look? I shouldn't be like this...I really shouldn't. I'm supposed to like chicks... But I don't.....
Yeah I know.....how could I possibly be gay if I'm supposedly so lucky with the ladies? Have you ever heard of cover-up? Believe me, I've tried to like girls, I really have. I've even gone as far as to try having sex with one.....that had to have been the worst night of my life.
Ugh, god.....now that night's flashing before my eyes....DAMN! It wouldn't have been so bad if I actually enjoyed it. But I didn't...and why..I'll never know. Is this how Ponyboy feels?
And yeah, I DEFINITELY think he's gay. Not half, FULL. I mean think about it....Ponyboy doesn't really show any interest in girls whatsoever. I'm sure he wonders what they're like, but just because you're gay doesn't mean you can't wonder what they're like (I'd know; I'm gay and I wonder all the time...).
But still....at least he's got Johnny. I don't have anybody. All that I go on is the lies I tell the boys about getting laid by by some drunken blonde chicks. I don't actually have a guy to love me.
Ponyboy and Johnny's relationship is so obvious it hurts, I sometimes think Sodapop and Steve are cheating on Evie and Sandy with each other, Darry's too busy working to have time for love, and Dallas...........he's single now. But for how long? How long will it take for him to find somebody else? What sex will that person be?
Shut up, Keith! You have GOT to stop thinking that maybe Dallas Winston likes guys. There's no way he'll EVER go out with you. Ever if you do love him with every inch of your soul.....
Are you happy now, people? You know my secret weakness. The one thing that can keep me from being as cheerful as I am....is the fact that I'll never hold the man of my dreams in my arms. Dallas Winston...
So now I'm in a bar...trying my damndest to get drunk off my ass. Completely wasted....like most of my love life. And then return to my happy-go-lucky self in the morning. Just to remember what I can't have...
Well, you know what they say: Everybody has a breaking point. Mine just happens to be Dally. I wonder what his is? Is it possible that I'm his breaking point?
God...I feel like slamming a bottle against my head. I must be a darn fool to think that! Even if Dally was gay, what makes me think he'd go for ME?! He'd probably try to steal Johnnycake away from Pony.....but he'd have nothing to do with me.
Ugh....what's wrong with me tonight? I'm usually dead-ass drunk by now! But...I'm only a bit tipsy. Ugh...what's the point?
Suddenly, I heard a noise. "ALRIGHT, WHO FUCKING SLASHED MY TIRES?". I turned my head to an angry Tim Shepard. "Was it you, drunkie?".
I shook my head no. "Sorry, Tim-ol'-boy! I didn't do nothin' to your precious tires". He rubbed his face and then slammed his fist against the counter. "Was it Dallas, Two-bit?".
My eyes widened. Dally was the one that did it. I saw him do it...... I wished I could've remembered that....
"Umm.....". Tim slapped his forehead. "Oh I KNEW it! That rat bastard! I'm gonna kick his greasy ass hard next time I see him!". I can't let that happen...
As much as I wanted to make a run for it, I knew that the bit of alcohol wouldn't let me do that. I may have not been as drunk as I wanted to be, but was still tipsy enough to trip over everything my feet would come into contact with. I may still be a junior at 18, but I still know well enough not to try running while intoxicated. And so with that, I walked hastily outside the bar and onward to warn Dally of the impending doom.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'm not even going to bother writing the part with Cherry and Marcia because, well, they are kind of annoying. The only time they're okay is either if it's a femmeslash fic about them, a Cherry/Dally fic (they might actually be a semi okay couple.....DEFINATELY not the best....but still), or a Marcia/Two-Bit fic. Otherwise, they are both annoying little Socs. I'll have mentions of them, certainly. But I'm not going to write the whole movie thing with them. I might write a part with them later, though.
And just as I warned you beforehand, Two-bit's a little bit OOC in this chapter. But still, slash fics usually have to be OOC enough for the two to get together. I'm sure Two-bit isn't gay, but slash fics change that rule entirely! (evil laughter)
