Disclaimer: Hm.. no one ever said I had to write these, but lots of people do, so ok. I do not own Naruto. But I do own the Kyuubi... No just kidding, I wish xD
(Morning, at Naruto's place. Naruto is about 5).
*Snore*
Naruto, wake up.
*SNORE*
Naruto, get your ass up immediately.
*SUPERDUPERSNORE*
SAKURA'S COMING!
Naruto ripped himself from his sleep and looked around in panic. "Sakura's's here? She's here? Oh no!" He jumped from his bed and peered into his mirror, and he saw this: his night cap sliding over one of his cerulean blue eyes, his matted hair plastered to his forehead, and his pyjama shirt stained with Ramen. "Crud!" Naruto exclaimed, running his fingers through his hair, trying to fix it. "How do I look, how's my hair, how do I-"
Naruto.
"Shut up Kyuubi! I mean tell me-" Naruto babbled, unsuccessfully trying to wipe of the stain from his shirt, "How do you look??? Arg!!"
Naruto. Sakura isn't coming.
"..." Naruto stood there, dumbfounded.
I was just trying to wake you up. Your snoring gave me a headache, and I ran out of Advil.
Naruto punched Kyuubi as hard as he could, although the blond ultimately found out that punching his stomach wasn't going to hurt the fox.* Groaning, he did a double-take, and fell to the floor, holding his stomach in slight agony.
I might've ran out of Advil, but I may have some pain killers in the back. The Kyuubi went to check.
*****
(Sometime after the pain-killers took effect)
Still wincing from his accident earlier on, Naruto examined the contents of his near-empty fridge, and after concluding that there was nothing left to eat but Ramen (although there was certainly no problem with that!) , he shoved the instant Ramen Cup into the microwave, and put it on for a couple of minutes. Although, the Kyuubi wasn't going to wait until after Naruto's daily dose of Ramen to make a comment.
This is disgusting! All you ever eat is the Ramen crap! Can't you get some fruit, or even some vegetables!
Ignoring this, Naruto went over to the microwave, and took out his ready Ramen. Sitting back down at the dining table, he broke some chopsticks, and took his first bite.
*gag!* Are you purposefully trying to make me sick!? Come on, I'll do anything, just stop this torture!
Grinning, Naruto continued to eat, relishing the moment.
NARUTO YOU STUPID KIT! PUT THAT CRAP DOWN BEFORE I LOSE-
Another gulp.
*BARF*
Hee, I like it when he plays dead; it's funny! Naruto thought innocently, as he had a sudden image of the giant Kyuubi lying on the floor on his back, all nine-tails limp and eyes crossed.
*****
Eventually, the Kyuubi came around from her morning problems, and Naruto had finally changed into his regular day attire; a black shirt and some beige pants.**
Hey Kyuubs, how are you in there?
Oh, I'm fabulous. That Ramen sure leaves behind a fabulous after taste.
See, I told you you'd like it eventually!
Kit, I'm been talking to you for over a year, and I still haven't taught you how to use frigin sarcasm.
No, you taught me something!
The Kyuubi lifted a eyebrow in disbelief from behind her bars.
You taught me my fucking vocabulary! Naruto gazed at himself in a large mirror, innocently. He had no clue what the f word meant, but if the Kyuubi had taught him it, then it was a good thing!
And isn't it colorful.
...Words can be colorful..?
... Nevermind...
Kyuubs, don't smack you forehead against those bars!... You told me you ran out of advil!
*****
(Around lunchtime)
Naruto was preparing to leave the house for lunch, and he had one place in mind... Locking the front door, he walked down the steps and into the streets, he navigated his way through the streets, searching for a familiar scent.
Naruto-kit! Frig, you just had that crap this morning! Go get some fresh fruit or something! Come on!
? I thought you said this morning that you liked Ra- The young blond was suddenly cut off when he walked into a person.
"Watch where you're going, you little demon brat!" The stranger yelled, brushing off his garments as if Naruto had dirtied them.
"Sorry ugly bitch!" Naruto exclaimed cheerfully.
Naruto, what the hell was that for! You don't go calling men bitches! You don't go calling people bitches at all!
Oh, Kyuubs, it's just that she gave me a nickname, and I thought I was supposed to give her one too!
Damn Naruto, apologize!
"Sorry lady!" Naruto exclaimed to the fuming stranger, who only turned redder at the apology.
What's wrong with her?
Naruto, 'she's' a 'he'. You'd better run...
Having ignored that, Naruto continued. Hey Kyuubs, why's she holding that pointy stick at me? And why is she yelling again?
Kit, that 'stick' is a dagger, now run!
Sure thing! "Bye old lady!" Naruto yelled at the man, waving. The man spazzed off, shaking his weapon in fury. Once Naruto reached his favourite ramen stand, he sat down, and though to Kyuubi:
Why was that old lady so grumpy?
That old lady was a guy kit.
Oh... But she looked like a she.
Whatever kit.
*Remember, Naruto's really young. You can't blame him for being rather lost. :P
** Naruto's not a ninja yet, so he's not wearing his orange and blue combo yet.
Ok, so you`ve got another taste at some sweet moments. All these suggestions were from my friends (they have an odd sense of humor) with my own touch :) Hope you liked it! Plz R and R
SO yeah, Ideas would be welcome on what you'd like to see, and if you have a scenario you'd like to see put up here, plz PM me . :D
