This chapter is by waterlooroader2013 (Emma).
Red; the colour of love, the colour of anger. I was so angry at myself for this, with each look at her I could feel myself losing control a tiny bit more. Lorraine Donnegan was always in control, not now; it was only a matter of time before Nikki Boston will have me totally and utterly head over heels in love with her. Ever since that kiss, feeling her soft lips pressed against mine, knowing that this is what we both wanted made me shiver inside. Maybe I shouldn't be angry, maybe this is all right...so perfectly right.
I lay curled up in my California King Size bed, with all the space in the world, and I choose to lay as close to my Nikki as possible, she was out for the count, her beautiful face looked peaceful as she slept, I could see her chest rise and fall perfectly, she was my world. I'd never felt like this with any of my other boyfriends, Nikki made me feel safe, like she'd protect me from anything that life might throw at us. I sat up slowly careful not to wake her, glancing over at my clock I realised that I've not settled down to sleep yet and it's already 2.38am. Stroking Nikki's hair I unconsciously started to talk to her, my thoughts were becoming a little speech to Nikki's sleeping ears.
"What are you like woman, there was me, straight, I thought, until you come along and turn my life around, what would they all say if they knew we were together eh? Oh...I don't care baby, I've got you, and you make me feel like the luckiest woman alive. Nikki Boston, I think I'm in love with you."
With those last 9 words, Nikki woke up from her perfect slumber, she opened her eyes and gazed at me, after a while, with a croaky voice laden with sleep, she whispered "Lorraine Donnegan, I've been in love with you since the moment my eyes met yours" I felt the tears threatening to fall down my face onto hers as I leant over her, our lips brushing against each others. I'd never let anyone see me cry, at work every day my game face took over, Lorraine Donnegan had no emotions, Lorraine Donnegan was heartless. Nikki saw a side to me that no-one else saw, she could always see right through me and that was one of things I loved about her. With that thought the tears came crashing down, I'd never been in love before, not properly, I'd got too good at pretending to love people to please my parents because they were always so happy when I got a boyfriend, that's when I first started to learn that if I was going to hide my homosexuality from the world, then I needed to have a barrier up constantly, I was only 15, so young, too young to have that right taken away from you, the right to express your feelings for the people that you fall for.
Nikki held me close, knowing that this was all new to me, knowing that those memories left scars that could never fully heal, I'd told her that by the age of 17 I thought that harming myself would shock me into realizing that it was boys I liked and the feelings for girls would go away, that never happened, who was I kidding. She kissed my forehead and whispered to me in her soft, soothing voice "sshhhh baby, I'm not going anywhere, I love you, more than anything in the world, and no one will take that love away from us."
Pulling myself up from laying on Nikki's chest I pushed her up against the headboard and kissed her with every emotion I had in me, love, anger, lust, hurt, confusion, excitement, too many to list, and she kissed me back, I knew she meant it, I could feel it in the way she moved, the way she looked at me. My life felt complete in that moment, everything had fallen into place, the school, my life, my girlfriend, and for the first time in my life, I felt truly happy. The kiss finally broke and Nikki lay in my arms, kissing my scars, we both felt at peace.
"Night night sweetheart" she said.
"Sleep tight baby" I replied placing a delicate kiss upon her head...
