"I was too slow," Ikkaku murmured, stroking Yumichika's knuckles, which were cold; not in death, of course, but nearly so. "I'm real sorry, buddy," he said to Kaa, whose face was paler by far than the yogurt that was waiting for Yumichika when he awoke.
They sat on either side of his hospital bed, and at that moment, Ikkaku was reminded of Yumichika's funeral.
Yumichika was still so beautiful, even wounded like this. His hair was like his favorite keys of the piano, his skin was like broken eggshells, and his lips were as pink as the inside of a clam. His chest rose in the rhythm of gentle ocean waves, and the insides of his elbows were peppered with needle-marks like eggnog spiced with nutmeg. His eyes, though closed, would've revealed a deep dulcet color that hardly anything in nature could match. His face was as marred as it had been when he had risen from his grave as a zombie, but Ikkaku still felt that his beauty was beyond compare, because Yumichika was alive.
"Why are you sorry, anyway," Kaa muttered, wiping his eyes and nose with a tissue, sniffling. Ikkaku had to admit that the man was really handsome and he looked like he took serious care of his appearance. What else would he expect from a man Yumichika was going to marry? That being said, it was rather alarming to see Kaa so torn apart like this, eyes leaky and hair a mess. Still, it was a far cry from seeing Kaa at Yumichika's funeral. Ikkaku truly didn't want Kaa's eyes to reflect even a ghost of the sorrow they'd held then.
"I mean, it's not like you ran him over, huh?" Kaa laughed a little bit, eyes still streaming as he held Yumichika's other hand. The guy was seriously a wreck, face red and puffy, voice warped. His dyed hair and his designer jacket seemed out of place, and the sunglasses clipped to his shirt were there despite the dull weather. His hair seemed to be the only bright color in the entire building. The guy looked like he'd walked straight off of a billboard, but Ikkaku could still see his hands shaking and the pain on his visage.
"Right," Ikkaku mumbled, still feeling that if he'd been quicker, maybe Yumichika wouldn't have gotten hurt. He kept forgetting that he shouldn't have known about the car crash beforehand, and that no one else knew that. He was all alone here, the only thing that had changed in this layer of reality.
Yumichika was beat up, but the important thing was that he was alive and still had all his limbs attached.
He'd gotten cut up pretty badly and had broken a few ribs. The car had been old, and there had been a few cracks compromising the windshield, so even though it had been driving relatively slowly, Yumichika's weight had been enough to break it.
Ikkaku kept imagining it in slow motion, the sound and the jolt of Yumichika's body as he was hit, flying up the hood and smashing straight through the windshield. His upper shoulder and his neck had been sliced right open and his cheek had needed stitches. His jeans had protected his legs pretty well, but he still had small cuts and large bruises all over his torso and his back especially.
Cotton was taped onto his face over the stitches, and luckily his eyes hadn't been hurt at all. He'd lost a lot of blood and had needed a defibrillator used twice, but he'd pulled through. He'd been sleeping after his emergency surgeries ever since. Kaa had been donating blood continuously to help the clinic out, even though he'd become anemic because of it.
Ikkaku had called Renji in a fit of boredom, talking to him for a while and letting him know what was going on. Renji was pretty concerned and was supposed to arrive in town tomorrow. Ikkaku thought about giving him a heads up that he was going to meet up with Ichigo at his new job, but he decided to let it remain a surprise.
"Uh, so," Kaa said awkwardly. Ikkaku looked up to him and his tear-stained face. It was hard to hate the guy, even though he and Yumichika were supposed to be getting married soon. Ikkaku didn't have the right to be jealous, because Kaa had been there first. "Uh… Who are you, exactly?" he asked somewhat rudely.
Ikkaku took a breath to answer, but Kaa seemed to feel bad about being so blunt. "Oh, that was mean… I just- You seem cool and everything, and I'm glad you showed up and that you cared about Yumichika being hurt, but is it okay if I ask how you guys know each other? He's never mentioned you."
"We met in high school," Ikkaku said blandly, even though that last bit had stung a little. He didn't elaborate further, knowing that Kaa was digging to see whether he had a crush on Yumichika. He wasn't gonna' tell him that. He could figure it out for himself if he'd seen how messed up he'd gotten when he'd thought Yumichika was going to die. "I care about him, and… well, just… calm down a little. It's not like I can steal him away, right? You guys are engaged."
"Heh, yeah," Kaa answered, but he wasn't smug about it, which was nice. The guy just smiled, suspicious mood lifting as he wiped his nose on his forearm. "You're all right, man. I really gotta' thank you."
"Nah, nah-" Ikkaku tried to brush it off.
"No, seriously." Kaa reached over the bed and put a hand on his shoulder. "He'd be dead if you hadn't dragged me out here. Thank you."
"You can thank me when he wakes up and chews us out for letting his face get scratched." Kaa started snickering and Ikkaku laughed too, because they both knew that he would do exactly that. After a few silent minutes of letting their smiles fade as they looked at Yumichika's sleeping face, Kaa spoke up again.
"You don't think he'll be that upset, will he? I hope he won't be sad… Aw man, you're right," Kaa said, putting his face in his free hand, running it through his hair and messing it up. "Shit, that won't be good for his career, and... Ugh, he'll be so disappointed. This means he's gonna' have a scar in our wedding photos."
"He'll be beautiful," Ikkaku said confidently, still holding Yumichika's hand, causing Kaa to look up in surprise. Then Kaa smiled, looking back at Yumichika fondly.
"Yeah… you're right." Yumichika's hand suddenly twitched in Ikkaku's grasp.
"Nn," Yumichika mumbled, blinking sleepily, face immediately scrunching up in pain. "Wh- Aaah," he moaned, face screwed up so much that Ikkaku thought he might tear his stitches. Yumichika tried to say something, but it came out completely mucked up. As soon as he got control of his mouth, he started cussing his little heart out, complaining about how much everything hurt and that their ugly faces were the last thing he'd wanted to see when he'd woken up.
Ikkaku could've kissed him right there.
"Oh, woah, calm down, babe," Kaa said with one of those voices people use when they're surprised and guilty that someone had been hurt, even if it was someone they hate. "Ya' want some water? What hurts, Yum-Yum?" Ikkaku mock-gagged at the stupid name, but Kaa didn't pay him any attention.
"Everything," Yumichika whined pitifully, starting to cry because he hurt so bad. Ikkaku let go of his hand when Yumichika tried to feel his face. He ended up smacking himself in the eye, which made Kaa grab his hand and take it back down. "What's on my face?" Yumichika asked, teeth gritted, which only served to stretch his stitches further. Ikkaku patted a napkin on Yumichika's eyes, wiping away the pained tears.
"It's a bandage. You had ta' get stitches," Kaa explained gently, running a hand down Yumichika's cheek and through his hair, so tender and soft that Ikkaku didn't think he'd be able to match it.
"Stitches?" Yumichika asked quickly in shock, "on my face?"
"You got hit by a car."
"Drunk driver," Ikkaku mumbled.
Yumichika gasped in horror. "Oh no, my face got cut?" Kaa bit his lip, but nodded. Yumichika lay there in shock with a stricken expression for a whole minute, not moving or responding to them. Ikkaku tried waving a hand in front of his face, but Kaa just pushed him away, taking Yumichika's shoulders.
"Yumichika… Hello?" Kaa put an ear to his forehead for some reason, like he was listening for thoughts. "Bubblegum? Are you okay? Ya' need a mirror?" That woke Yumichika up.
Kaa had a little mirror in his pocket, but Ikkaku noticed that there were camouflage stickers that were a poor attempt at making it look tougher. "Here," Kaa deliberately put it in Yumichika's hands, helping him hold it at the right angle. They were lucky that Yumichika had those bandages on, because Yumichika probably would've thrown a complete tantrum if he'd seen his facial wound. Ikkaku and Kaa actually didn't know what it looked like yet, either, but they assumed that it was bad. Ikkaku had seen it before when it had been an open gouge on a corpse's face, but he expected that it wouldn't look nearly as gruesome now. The nurse had told them that the cut was clean and that the stitches had gone in like a dream, so the scarring wouldn't be too bad, but…
Yumichika began spiraling into depression, but Kaa shook him out of it, being quite cheery and visibly grateful that Yumichika had survived. "Hey, don't be so grey, honey. Smile a little. You're alive."
"I'm alive," Yumichika repeated dully, and then again softly with a strange look in his eyes, and for a moment Ikkaku had to wonder… did he?… No, it couldn't be.
Kaa shook his head, taking Yumichika's hand, biting his lip. He gave a little sigh, shaking his head desperately. "Oh my god, I'm so glad you're okay, I hate you, don't ever do this again, I'll kill you, I swear I'll kill you, I love you, oh my god," he said in one long breath, hugging Yumichika tight, practically climbing on the bed.
"OW!" Yumichika screamed, causing a nurse to bust into the room and give him his pain medicine. Kaa got swatted with her clipboard, but not by her. Yumichika swiped it and hit him in the face. "Your bedside manner is shit!"
"Yeah, take some advice from me," Ikkaku muttered. Yumichika stared at him for a minute, a finger pointed, mouth open as if the joke took a couple seconds. Then he started laughing hysterically and saying 'owch' over and over as his stomach curled up and his cheek tugged at the stitches, but he kept laughing. Kaa was grinning a little in confusion, glad that Yumichika had been brought out of his mood, but not getting the joke.
When Yumichika could finally breathe again, he told his fiance that it was because Ikkaku worked at a funeral parlor, so his bedside manner was probably good… because of the dead people.
"Tss'," Kaa laughed, appreciating the dark humor.
"Glad you're back," Ikkaku mumbled with a grimace, patting Yumichika's hand. Yumichika gave him the strangest look, and Ikkaku suddenly remembered that this wasn't his Yumichika. This was the past Yumichika that hadn't fallen in love with him or sweetly haunted him as a ghost. Yumichika knew nothing of those times they'd shared or how they'd bonded. Yumichika probably was wondering why on earth he was here or why he'd been holding his hand when he'd awoken. They were strangers again.
Ikkaku was all alone.
"Really, I am," he whispered, and he meant it, despite the heartache it caused. He should probably just go home to his lonely apartment and get some sleep.
Yumichika smiled at him. "Me too." Ikkaku's chest tightened up all of a sudden, and he felt a strong urge to burst into tears.
Ikkaku knew he wouldn't be able to stay without the risk of getting weird suspicious looks from Kaa, but he came to visit multiple times per day, rushing through his work for the first time ever, because he finally had something to do. In a strange stroke of good luck, neither Kaa nor Yumichika mentioned that his presence was strange, even though they were technically strangers again, and they seemed to enjoy his company, so Ikkaku kept coming. They played 'Go Fish' and told internet knock-knock jokes for hours, and they even sang stupid songs with loopy-Yumichika at three in the morning when he was high on his pain meds and couldn't get to sleep.
He was starting to settle down, almost forgetting about his luck-curse and the misfortune it could bring if he got too comfortable. As long as he could, he enjoyed the company. He didn't truly enjoy being alone all the time with only the dead for company. It was nice to have friends, even if those two people would only occupy his world for such a short time. This place would be their vacation home, and soon enough they would go off and get married, enjoying their fame and the spice of their love affair. Ikkaku hoped they would send him pictures if they traveled on their honeymoon. Even if it was pathetic to try to live vicariously, Ikkaku wished that he could share even a piece of their happiness. Truly, he was glad that they were together. It was a small price to pay if both of them would live on.
When the nurse told them that Yumichika could be released next week, Ikkaku went home with a grin on his face, enjoying the glow that seemed to be coming out of his heart. He'd fixed everything, and he didn't feel any sort of regret about it, even though it meant that his love was in another's arms. He really was happy. This was what he wanted, for Yumichika to have the dreams that he'd lost. Everything was okay now.
As he walked home to his apartment, he enjoyed the rare glimpse of the sky where he could see it. It was a clear night for once, the clouds having parted, and in the small openings between the tree leaves, he could see a dazzling night sky free from light pollution. He'd never seen anything like it in the city. The stars were absolutely beautiful.
The skyline was dark, except for an area in the east, perhaps where the sun had set. The sky over there was glowing orange, and clouds in the fading sunlight were glowing… No, that couldn't be, because the sun set in the west.
Ikkaku walked down to the end of the street, looking back to the house on the hill.
"Oh my god," he moaned, a hand over his mouth. He'd completely forgotten. "It's on fire."
