Emma had no idea how long she had been standing outside the Mansion. Just looking at the house made her heart ache. She needed to do this, it was now or never. She straightened her shoulders and rang the doorbell. For the longest time nothing happened, and Emma started wondering if Regina was even at home. Then suddenly she heard the all too familiar staccato of Regina's heels on the marble floor inside. Emma's heart beat so fast it felt like it was about to burst inside her chest. The door was wrenched open and there she was, in all her beauty.

"Hi."


Emma stood by the couch and watched Regina's back, while the other woman was pouring them some drinks. She was so nervous she didn't really know what to do with herself.

She had to admit that she was a bit surprised that after the initial shock of seeing Emma at her doorstep, Regina was awfully polite. She had smiled at Emma and invited her in for a drink.

Regina looked like she had lost weight, and from the few moments Emma had actually seen her face after she opened the door she looked really tired, her usually olive skin too pale and dark circles under her eyes. In all the years Emma had known Regina, and from what her parents told her about their time in FairyTaleLand, no matter what had happened Regina never let any perceived weakness or imperfection show. So what happened? Was she sick? Or maybe… Emma didn't get to finish her thought because Regina had turned around, two glasses of scotch in her hands. She motioned with her head for Emma to go sit on the couch, handed her one of the drinks and moved back to sit in the leather chair.

For what felt like forever the two just looked at each other, neither of them saying a word. The silence was starting to get uncomfortable, and Emma nervously fidgeted on the couch.

"So…"

Silence again. Regina just looked at Emma and raised an eyebrow.

"So what?" she asked.

Emma felt her face flush and tried to hide it by looking intensely to the floor. After she'd made her decision on the plane that she would try to talk to Regina, she had come up with a whole speech in her head, but now that she was actually only a few feet away from the woman she couldn't remember a damn thing. Emma could feel Regina's eyes on her; she cleared her throat and looked up.

"I miss you."

Emma blushed furiously. That was definitely not how she had planned to start the conversation.

Regina didn't move. Her mouth opened slightly, and for a millisecond Emma could have sworn that she saw a smile forming on the other woman's face, but it was gone so fast that she could not be sure if it was real or just wishful thinking on her part. There was an array of emotions visible in Regina's eyes, until they hardened and she suddenly stood up.

"I think you should go."

Emma gaped at Regina.

"What?"

"You heard me. You should go."

Regina placed her glass on the small table by the chair and walked briskly to the door. Emma jumped up and grabbed her arm.

"Please, Regina. We need to talk."

Regina glared at Emma. She tried to wrench her arm out of Emma's grip.

"Let go of me," she growled.

Emma let go of her arm but took a step forward right into Regina's personal space.

"Please, Regina. I just want to talk."

"Talk?" the brunette huffed. "About what?"

"Us."

"There is no us anymore."

"Please, don't say that," Emma pleaded. "I know you haven't been seeing anyone since…"

She didn't get to finish her sentence, because Regina was immediately in her face.

"Says who?" Her voice was ice cold. "Are you spying on me, Miss Swan?"

"No, of course I am not spy…" Emma felt frustration bubbling up in her and she took a deep breath to not let things get even more out of hand. Regina calling her Miss Swan only barely registered with her.

"Regina, please. Let's not fight, okay?"

She took a step back in hopes of easing the tension between them a little.

"We need to talk."

"So now you want to talk?" Regina huffed. "If I remember correctly it was you who packed her things and moved across the country to get as much space as possible between us."

"I know," Emma said, her voice only a whisper. She had no idea how to respond. Regina was right, it was Emma who had taken the cowardly way out and ran.

"Two years!"

"I know."

"Two years!" Regina repeated. "I wake up one morning to you standing there with your stuff packed up telling me that you will move out."

Regina's voice got louder with each word.

"Then suddenly two weeks later you are gone. I had to hear from Snow that you moved to California."

Now it was Regina who invaded Emma's personal space.

"From Snow of all people," she yelled.

Emma had the decency to blush at that.

"Regina, I am so…."

"Two years." Regina interrupted. "No email, no phone call, no text message. Nothing. Not one word."

Emma could feel tears stinging behind her eyes. Yeah. She had royally fucked up.

"Regina, I…"

"NO!" Regina yelled. "Don't Regina me. You have made it perfectly clear that there is no us anymore. There is nothing that we need to talk about. So if you would be so kind, I'd like you to leave my house now."

She stepped back and motioned with her arm to the hall.

Emma stood for a second, not sure what to do. Looking at Regina, she knew that it would be better to leave, so she slowly made her way past Regina to the front door, the clicking of high heels telling her that the brunette was following behind her.

She opened the door and turned around once more to look at Regina.

"I love you," Emma said, tears now freely falling from her eyes.

Regina flinched, but didn't say a word.

"I love you Regina. I never stopped loving you. I know I fucked up. I know that and maybe I don't deserve a second chance, but I will not stop trying." With that she turned around and closed the door behind her.


The cool air hit Emma like brick wall. She took a deep breath and leaned back against the door, silently crying, not knowing that Regina did exactly the same on the other side.