Author: berrybaby27
Title: "What would you have me do?" Chapter 1
Characters: Megamind, Roxanne Ritchi.
AU - Set pre-movie.
As my favorite episode of "A closer look at Metrocity" came to a close, I sighed and clicked off television. Now that Roxanne had disappeared off the screen, there was officially no reason to have it on any longer. The remote slipped between me and the side of my chair as I dropped my head to my knees, which were still drawn up into my chest. I let out another deep sigh and felt the heat from my breath on my legs. It was a welcome contrast from the chill that hung in the room to say the least. As much as I hated to admit the inevitable, it looked as if I would be spending yet another night away from the evil layer.
Since there really was no other option at that point, I curled myself up in my chair and tried to get some rest. I had almost drifted off into a not so deep sleep when an unfamiliar female voice cut through the air.
"Megamind slowly fell into a slumber, brought on more by boredom than actual fatigue."
My eyes flew open and I jumped from my chair. "Who's there!" I called out into the darkness.
*Silence*
I squinted my eyes, searching the darkness of room for the origin of the voice, but there was no one. I eyed the corner of my cell that I had sworn the voice had come from and took one step closer to my chair. I reached my hand out; blindly grabbing for the arm, I spun it around so I could cautiously retake my seat, never once taking my eyes off of the corner in question. I half expected a strange woman to jump out of the shadows, but that was just crazy...
The voice subsided for several minutes. Just long enough for me to start to relax back into the safety of my seat, and then it started in again.
"Unbeknownst to him, Minion was already on his way to break him out of his overdue incarceration."
I slunk down in my chair, hoping that whoever was in the room would just go away. Suddenly a thought hit me. Why was I, the master of all villainy, scared of a silly human female? Uhhh…Maybe because I was locked in my cell in the middle of the night? My inner voiced countered back. I waved the thought and the voice away with my hand and laughed. "It must be the new intercom system." I reaffirmed out loud, trying to convince myself.
"Minion knew it was their rule, that if communication had failed to be reached in a timely manner, it was his job to initiate the backup plan that Megamind referred to as Plan B. Never realizing that Plan B was also a brand name for a commonly known back up birth control product. "
Ok now this was just getting freaky. I turned myself around in the chair; grabbing the back of the seat, I peaked over the edge, only my nose, eyes and the top of my grand head were visible. "Ok…Who are you! And how do you know about my plan B?" I boomed out into the blackness of the room. Unfortunately my voice came out in more of a squeak instead of the scary intimidating tone I had been shooting for...
Again I was met with only silence.
"Warden! If you think this is funny, I can assure it is not!"
Suddenly there was a rumbling from outside the walls of my cell and the faint yet distinct sounds of my brainbots could be heard. Minion…he really was on his way to spring me out. Impossible!
Well impossible as it may have seemed, he was there with over 30 brainbots in toe. I ran to the far edge of the room, making sure I was a safe distance from the impending demolition. Throwing my hands over my ears, I braced for impact.
*BOOM*
The whole room shook violently and the wall of my cell exploded. Large pieces of rubble flying in all directions. After I knew it was safe, I pushed myself from the wall and brushed the soot off my now soiled jumpsuit suit. Not exactly the escape plan I had been hoping for, but it would do.
*WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO - OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO*
Oh no. The alarm had been tripped. This was going to make things a little more difficult. We had only a matter of seconds to make our escape.
"Sir, we better hurry!" Minion called into the room.
At first I nodded, but then unsure if he could actually see me through all the dirt and debris that was floating through the room, I decided to make a verbal acknowledgment. "Yes Minion. We haven't a moment to lose!"
Jumping through the hole, we fled to invisible car that was parked just beyond the gate that now also had a huge gaping hole. Eeeesh, the taxpayers were going to be paying for this escape attempt for many years to come.
Hot our trail, I could hear the warden and a couple of the on duty guards from behind us "Get him you fools!"
We made it to the invisible car just in time. Both Jumping into our seats, we sped off like a shot. The brainbots trailing not far behind. Making sure we weren't being followed, I turned my attention the back window. There was the warden and his dopes stopped just outside the prison gates. The guards were doubled over their legs trying to catch their breath, while the warden was shaking his fist and yelling some pretty colorful words our direction. Ah our wonderful cities enforcement team at their finest.
"Mwhahahahah! Catch you later Warden!"
"Sir, I am so sorry it has taken me this long to come get you out." Minion apologized
"It's quite all right Minion. I think I needed the extra time away..."
"Still, it seemed like time flew by much faster than I had realized. I hope you are not angry with me."
"Of course not."
Truth was I was so grateful to see him, the fact he was over a month late seemed inconsequential at that point. Especially after the odd happenings that had taken place earlier in the night. Oh that's right. In all the excitement I had almost forgotten all about the odd invisible female visitor who had graced my presence less than an hour before.
"Minion?"
"Yes Sir?"
"Have you ever heard of a contraceptive called "Plan B?"
"Sir?"
"Er… Nevermind."
