Mikan lay sprawled across her couch, wearing nothing but underwear and an oversized t-shirt that hung mid-thigh. It was a man's shirt. It was his shirt. For the most part, she had tried to get rid of his stuff. It stayed in two boxes next to the door. She would have called Ruka to come and give it to him, but he was away. He had finally built up the nerve to ask Hotaru to marry him, but was travelling with her to her parents' house in order to ask them for permission before he popped the question. Ruka had confided in Mika before he left. He helped her find a birthday present for Natsume and she had helped him pick out a ring for Hotaru that day in the park. Thinking of it caused her eyes to water slightly. She wiped her tears and rolled to face the television. The mindless chatter hummed in the background as she dozed slightly. The door creaked. That was probably Yoichi. He had been checking in on her regularly ever since he had found out that Natsume had broken up with her.
"Yoichi?" she mumbled from the couch, one arm splayed across her eyes. Her hair was pulled into those familiar twin tails and fanned across the couch arm. She could hear the soft footfalls of shoes in the entryway of her house.
"Yoichi?" she repeated. The steps paused at the door of her living room.
"No, it's me." A rich baritone echoed. Natsume? It couldn't be him, she must've been hallucinating.
"Ahh, sure," she retorted sarcastically, refusing to move her arm from her eyes. The fluorescent lights shone brightly down on her. The windows were open and the November breeze filled the room. It had been two weeks since Natsume broke up with her. Two long, tiring weeks. In that span of time, she had fallen sick twice during her shift at the nursery. Luckily Sumire and Yoichi helped her, even when the medical bills started piling up. Today was Sunday. The nursery was closed, but she had picked up a part time job at the local café that started at 2. It was only 11 in the morning, so she indulged herself and stayed lazing about. But maybe all this lazing was unhealthy. She was starting to hallucinate and create a Natsume from her imagination. She missed him wholeheartedly.
"Hmm?" the voice rumbled.
"Definitely mad," she mumbled. Mikan turned to burrow deeper into the couch, clutching a pillow. She was afraid to look and realize that he wasn't there.
"I'm here to drop your stuff off."
A box dropped with a resounding clunk, shocking Mikan out of her nap. She twisted to face the entrance and saw him standing there, his dark red eyes burning her as they raked over her body. She flushed to the roots of her hair, realizing her dark red underwear was visible through Natsume's sheer white shirt.
"Oh,"
It was an awkward sound that filled the room. She sat up straight and took a good look at him. His hair shone brightly and his eyes were cold and distant. He looked good, he always did. Mikan, on the other hand, felt drab and plain standing next to him. She wordlessly pointed to the boxes of stuff she had collected for him by the door. His gaze clung to the shirt.
"Is that mine?"
"Y-yeah. Sorry."
She pulled it over her head and held it out to him, clad only in her underwear. It was a bold move, and they both knew it. An invitation, one that he choose to deny as he plucked the shirt from her hand and refused to look at her. Disheartened, Mikan wrapped herself in the plush throw that was draped on the couch.
"Let me get changed, I'll come in a bit to help you." She whirled into her bedroom and Natsume ached to follow her. He had admired her trim figure dressed in nothing but her underwear and his shirt. He felt some measure of disgust at himself, realizing that he still found her attractive, even after all she'd done. She came back quickly, wearing pants this time, and directed him to the two large boxes in the doorway. He picked up the smaller one, leaving her to struggle with the larger box out of spite. She huffed, blowing her hair out of her face, and bent down to grab it. The world spun slightly.
"The car's started" Natsume brusquely informed her from outside. It was a reminder nonetheless. She gritted her teeth and tried to clear her head.
She hoisted the box up and tottered down the steps from the apartment. There was a short flight of stairs leading to the ground. Mikan quickly descended, but set down the box at the bottom.
"Natsume, could you get this? I don't feel so good."
It took him by surprise- it would take a great deal to get Mikan to overcome her stubbornness. He gave her a curt nod and picked the box up, feeling bad that he had tried to burden her with the larger box. Natsume turned around and loaded the box into the trunk of his car. Looking back, he expected Mikan to remain standing on the bottom step, but was shocked to find her sitting with her head between her knees. Her skin was pale -even more so in the shade- and he remembered the dark circles under her eyes.
"Mikan?"
It was a tentative question, and Natsume sped to her side, placing one hand on her shoulder. He shook her gently and froze when she didn't respond, but slumped forward. He caught her before her head hit the ground and frantically pulled her willing body into his arms. Carrying her bridal style, he moved into his car, ready to drive to the hospital.
Halfway there, she opened her eyes slightly.
"Where ya taking me?" she slurred. Her hands were weakly straining against the seatbelt as she tried to push it off. Despite the gravity of the situation, he couldn't help smiling slightly; perhaps she still wasn't fully awake.
"Hospital."
"I dooon't wanna goo…" she pouted before snuggling into his arm. Natsume stiffened slightly, and nearly veered into a car on the left. The honking brought him out of his reverie.
"You're clearly not feeling well, so I'm checking you in."
"Natsumeee! I'm not gonna go!" she huffed slightly and dozed off in his seat. Knowing that Mikan was incredibly stubborn when she put her mind to it, he turned the car around and headed to his house.
The drive didn't last long. Natsume was content to travel the highways to his apartment with Mikan by his side. Moments like this allowed him to go back to when he was first in love, cautiously opening his heart to another. She was always so open with hers, exposing it to him wholly. He was more careful and she had to pry piece by piece until he let her in. But even now Natsume couldn't deny that he had enjoyed it in the beginning. And if she hadn't betrayed him, he would've considered marrying her. Marriage. It used to seem within reach, but now Natsume felt eons away from it. It was beyond his grasp. But he wasn't sure it was something he wanted to grab. Shaking the dangerous thoughts from his head, he pulled into the parking garage and prodded Mikan gently.
"Natsume," she breathed out. His name was beautiful, and incredibly sensual upon her lips. He almost wanted to bring his own lips down and gently brush them against hers.
Something inside him shattered slightly. He was still in love with her. The realization hit him quickly, mercilessly. Even after all she had done to him, his heart was open to her. And she was somehow managing to push her way back into his life. Steeling his own resolve, Natsume vowed to harden himself from anyone, especially her. And that meant starting now.
