The next morning Lassiter got up and went through his morning routine. It wasn't until he started putting his three creams and four sugars in his coffee that he noticed Spencer wasn't there with him. He frowned and looked around the entire apartment for him before shaking his head and heading to work. Maybe the past month had simply been hallucinations.
Lassiter tried to clear his thoughts as he sat down at his desk. He needed to get to work and solve the Hubert case.
"Any new leads?" O'Hara's voice broke into Lassiter's concentration. Lassiter snapped his eyes up from the case report to see his partner standing in front of him. He normally wasn't the kind of person who paid attention to changes in people's behaviors, unless he was investigating them as part of a crime, but he had noticed a change in O'Hara over the past three months. Her chipper attitude was lacking and her hair had gotten messy again. There were usually bags under her eyes, as if she wasn't getting enough sleep if she were getting any at all.
Lassiter shook his head. "We're still waiting on the coroner's report. Until then we can only question the neighbors."
O'Hara stifled a yawn. "You got the copy of my statements, right?
Lassiter held up the file with his partner's delicate penmanship across the label. "Got them last night."
O'Hara gave a small smile. "Good, I told the coroner to let me know as soon as his report is finished."
Lassiter nodded and watched his partner walk away.
"She's not wearing those super swanky pant suits any more." Shawn said a little sadly.
Lassiter turned to see the psychic watching O'Hara walk back to her desk. "Where have you been?" He demanded.
"I was out. Why, Lassifrass? Do you suddenly care about where I go now?" Shawn teased.
Lassiter glared at him. "You usually bug me all morning while I'm at the apartment. I was just wondering where you were when I didn't have to answer a large number of ridiculous questions while eating breakfast this morning."
"You mean while you drank coffee and ate half a bagel with a tiny, microscopic bit of cream cheese on it?" Shawn asked. "Seriously, you need to eat some eggs or bacon in the morning. Good protein."
"Stop judging what I eat!" Lassiter protested, keeping his voice quiet. He didn't need the chief after him for 'talking to himself' again. He grabbed some files, they needed to go back into the evidence room.
Shawn followed behind him, changing the subject as he talked. "You know who you haven't talked to in a long time?"
Lassiter knew what the answer to that question. He didn't respond and just let Spencer continue.
"Gus. You should call him up and get coffee. I want to know how he's doing."
Lassiter was quiet as he unlocked the door to the evidence room. He hadn't seen Guster since the funeral and he had done everything to avoid him there. The last time he had had a conversation with Burton Guster was the day of the accident.
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Henry came back to the waiting area. He'd just called Shawn's mother. His eyes were red and watery. He sat down and sighed. "I have to call Gus." He stared at his phone. "He's going to be devastated."
"I'll call him." Lassiter heard himself volunteer. "You shouldn't have to." He gave Henry a firm pat on the shoulder and then pulled open his cell phone. He started to dial Guster's number and then closed the phone. This was something that had to be done in person.
It was Thursday, which meant Guster was on his route. After getting his schedule from the office, Lassiter was waiting for the pharmaceutical rep when he walked out of Dr. Allen's office building.
"Lassie? What are you doing here?" Gus was rolling his samples case behind him. His face was puzzled. He only saw Lassiter when he was on a case with Shawn.
"Guster," Lassiter felt his stomach tighten. He never had problems calling the next of kin in murder investigations, but this was different. "you should sit down."
Gus gave him a weird look, but sat on the bench just outside Dr. Allen's door.
Lassiter paced for a second. "There's... there's been an accident."
"What kind of accident? Is Juliet okay?" The wheels in Gus' head were spinning as he went through every possible scenario of why Lassiter was there. When Lassiter didn't say anything, Gus' shoulders slumped. "Shawn?" He whispered.
Lassiter sighed and then sat on the bench as well. "I just came from the hospital. He was hit by a van. He's dead." Lassiter watched Guster's face go through a mixture of shock and disbelief and then the tears had started. Any other time Lassiter would have told Guster to suck it up and be a man, but now, looking at him Lassiter just silently offered him his handkerchief.
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"Lassie! You still with me buddy?"
Lassiter scowled and opened the door. "Of course I am. I'm fine."
"So are you going to call Gus?"
"I'm not going to go talk with Guster just because you don't know how he's doing. You can go stalk him yourself."
"But I can't ask him things. Lassie, if you go then I can have you ask things!"
"Absolutely not." Lassiter refused. "Your psychic bull crap was bad enough when you were actually alive, Spencer. I will not tolerate it when you're..."
"Gone," Shawn supplied.
"Dead," Lassiter sighed.
"Carlton?" O'Hara's voice came from the doorway and made Lassiter jump.
"What?" He snapped out, harsher then he meant to be with his partner.
Juliet flinched involuntarily, but stood her ground. "The coroner's report is going to be delayed due to some inconsistencies. That's what Woody says at least."
Lassiter nodded, wondering if he should apologize to her.
"Are you doing alright, Carlton?"
There is was. The dreaded question. Everyone asked him that. The chief, McNab, O'Hara. They all asked him at least twice a day. It was a constant inquiry into Lassiter's personal life.
"I'm fine, O'Hara." Lassiter gave his usual response, ignoring the look Spencer was giving him. He hated the way Spencer's looks made him squirm. It was like he knew what was really going on inside Lassiter's head every time someone asked him if he was fine. Lassiter scowled, the psychic was a damn ghost... or something, Lassiter shouldn't feel guilty because of his looks.
"I'm going to get lunch with Gus. Do you want to come along?" Juliet gave Lassiter a hopeful look.
"You should go with her, Lassie! Go see Gus and tell him to not be a weeping chocolate bunny." Shawn encouraged him.
Lassiter slowly shook his head. "I can't today." He said and then brushed by his partner to head upstairs.
"Lassie, Juliet is probably going to cry down there because you won't go get lunch with her." Shawn was yelling after his as Lassiter tried to head back to his desk.
"Go away, Spencer. I can't deal with you today. Please give me a day where I can think I'm not going insane." Lassiter hissed, turning abruptly to face ended up walking through Lassiter, which meant the detective had to turn again so he could look at the psychic. "Go do something else and leave me alone."
"Fine," Spencer was upset and for once Lassiter was glad no one was able to hear him. "I'll go watch my best friend and the girl I flirted with for four years, but never had the guts to tell her I liked her, have lunch. I'll let you know if they say anything interesting." He stuck his tongue out at Lassiter.
Lassiter threw his hands up in the air and stormed off to the morgue. He wanted an explanation of the 'inconsistencies' O'Hara had mentioned.
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Buzz McNab stood watching the exchange between Detective Lassiter and what was apparently empty air. He frowned slightly and then went to find Juliet.
"Hi, Buzz." Juliet tried to be cheerful as the rookie cop came up to her desk.
"Detective," McNab nodded, being polite. He shifted from foot to fooot.
"What is it, Buzz? I have to go through these witness statements."
The rookie spoke carefully, not wanting to imply anything that wasn't true. "Have you noticed something off about Detective Lassiter in the past few months."
Juliet glanced around to make sure Lassiter wasn't around. "I'm glad I'm not the only one. He has been off since we worked the double homocide about about a month ago." She was whispering, just in case.
"I just saw him have a conversation with an empty corridor."
"He's talking to himself all morning and in the evidence room when I went down there to ask him to lunch."
"Have you gone to the chief?"
O'Hara nodded. "A couple of times. I know she talked to him yesterday, but he keeps saying he's fine."
"The weird part," McNab hesitated, he didn't like telling tales outside of school. "He said something about Shawn."
Juliet took a deep breath "Just keep an eye on him," She gave Buzz a shaky smile and gave him a pat on the shoulder. "I've got to head out to lunch."
"Say hi to Gus for me. Tell him he doesn't have to be a stranger around here."
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Lassiter grumbled as he walked to the deli just a few blocks from the station. O'Hara had been right when she had said the coroner's report would be delayed. Apparently it took a while to find out why a man bled to death.
He found an empty booth in the corner and for once was ignoring his surroundings. Being able to eat with out the prying eyes and constant yapping of Spencer would be a nice change.
"I'm just worried about him,"
Lassiter froze. His partner's voice was a sound Lassiter could pick out of a crowd of a hundred people.
"He hasn't said a word to me since... that day."
Damn it, that was Guster's voice. Why of all the places that they could have gone for lunch did they pick the same place as Lassiter. They had to be in the booth behind him. Hopefully they wouldn't notice he was there.
"Gus, I'm worried about him. He's talking to himself at crime scenes, at the station." O'Hara sighed. "Buzz thought he heard him talking to Shawn today."
"Do you think he's losing it?" Lassiter could hear the tinge of concern in Guster's voice.
O'Hara sighed again. "I really wish I knew. I wish he would go talk to the department psychiatrist. I think it would be good for him."
Lassiter frowned and then had to hold in a groan when he saw Shawn sitting across the booth from him.
"They really do care for you, Lassie." The psychic said. "You should go say hello. Well, maybe not right now because that could get a little awkward, since they're talking about you."
Lassiter rolled his eyes and tried to focus on what his partner was saying.
"The chief has noticed it too." She was still talking about him.
"I won't lie and say that I've been fine since..." Guster trailed off.
"It's been hard. I just wish Lassiter would see that." O'Hara agreed with him.
Lassiter frowned. He knew it was hard. Why should it be easier for him then anyone else. He'd known Spencer just as well as the rest of them... albeit reluctantly.
"This is called sharing feelings, Lassie." Shawn was leaning on the table, his chin propped up on his hands. "It's what normal people do."
"I share my feelings," Lassiter hissed at him. "Just not with everyone."
"Name the last person you shared your feelings with, and don't say my mom, because we both know that you faked that session." Shawn challenged him.
"Damn it, you have no idea what you're talking about." Lassiter half shouted. The case was going no where and now Spencer was wanting him to share his feelings. He stormed out of the deli.
As her partner left Juliet looked to Gus, wide eyed. She had no doubt that her partner had heard every word of the conversation she had just had.
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Lassiter was walking fast as he headed back to the station.
Shawn was walking backwards in front of him, talking the whole time. "You need to cool down, Lassie. We don't want your blood pressure to get too high."
Before Lassiter could give a response he heard someone running behind him. The detective turned and saw Burton Guster, half sprinting after him.
"Lassiter," Gus caught up with him and had to bend over to catch his breath.
"Guster," Lassiter saw a huge grin spreading across Spencer's face.
"Dude, you have to talk to him. I need to know what he's doing. Is he dating anyone? I bet Gus is getting all the sympathy dates he can."
"You heard what Juliet said?" Gus had caught his breath and was standing normally.
Lassiter nodded. "It's what everyone has been saying."
"That you're not fine?"
"They think I'm crazy. They think I've finally snapped. That Spencer's death was the final nail in the coffin holding my brain." Lassiter was venting now. "I've heard the murmurs. McNab and O'Hara's are the nicest."
"Well..." Gus thought back to Juliet's comment about Lassiter talking to himself. "What about Shawn?" The man's voice cracked as he said his best friend's name even after two months and he stared at the ground.
"Give him a hug, Lassie." Shawn looked sad and was standing next to Gus. "Sometimes a man just needs a hug."
"I don't do hugs," Lassiter frowned at him.
Gus looked up. "Hugs?"
Lassiter sighed. "Sometimes... a man just needs a hug." He braced himself internally and held out his arms. "Do you want a hug, Guster?" He could see Spencer's face break out into glee, an emotion Lassiter had almost forgotten about.
Gus slowly shook his head. "No, thanks, I'm good. What about Shawn?"
Lassiter dropped his arms and put his hands in his pockets. He knew he couldn't tell Guster what he'd been seeing for the past month. That would just confirm the murmurs. He would have officially gone crazy. "Nothing about Spencer." He ignored the glare Spencer was giving him at that very moment. "I'm fine."
"Lassie," Shawn protested as the detective turned to walk away. "I can't even give him a fist bump!"
Lassiter didn't turn around. He wasn't going to share his feelings with Guster. He knew that much. There was a case to solve. Hubert had been murdered, Lassiter was sure of it.
