A/N: Hey everybody! I just wanted to tell everyone that this is purely an everlark fanfic and I'm sorry you all gale lovers and you all can give me suggestions on how I can drag this story because I really wish to make this one matter to all peeta's babaes out there . recap: Katniss loves peeta but due to her fear of becoming like her mother she breaks up with him and now 5 years later they meet at a bar with gale, madge, finnick, johanna,annie.
CHAPTER:2
I am captivated by Peeta's azure eyes . I can't seem to think about anything but just how much I adore this man in front of me and how I broke his heart with a message that read:
I am sorry but we are through Peeta , I can't marry you
Night before I broke his heart he proposed to me near my father's lake house and the realization of commitment hit me harder than a whole mountain , My mind was filled with my promise to never fall in love which I made to myself when my dad died and I left him and disappeared from his life and came here leaving him heartbroken. Look now how the almighty have fallen my life is full of ironies isn't it , because now all I want is a life with Peeta . But he probably hated me now . I try to muster up a smile as Peeta introduces himself to everyone . He is introducing himself to gale which means I'm next . I try to calm myself but it isn't going very well .
Peeta's eyes turn into pools of joy as they set on my grey on my grey ones but I feel guilty knowing how I broke his heart . he extends his hand but I jump on him wrapping my around him just wanting to feel him again "hey! great to see you" I say grinning like a fool and sniff a little on him and he still smells the same cinnamon and vanilla like he always used to.
"great to see you too" he says as we break apart. I know I must be blushing because he chuckles when he sees my face "You look great" he says and blush harder. doesn't he understands how many butterflies are in my stomach right now that he is trying to multiply them! I just into his azure eyes and he does the same looking into my steely grey ones . It's almost that we are expressing how much we used to love each other but I still do love him that much or maybe more . I am just about to stop myself from kissing him when finnick clears his throat"you two know each other?" "yeah we were in the same school"peeta answers turning himself to finnick but wait what? we were in the same school is that it ? aren't you going to tell them our tale of great love? I feel a little brushed off but I try to suppress it as we make our way to the lounging area . Once we are seated we order drinks and everyone starts talking about something as I zone out and try to decide how am I am going to win Peeta back.
I snap out when gale asks Peeta"Okay Peeta we all know each other very well but we don't know you . Tell us your story?" Peeta tries to shrug it off and change the topic and I see hesitation in his yes I want to tell everyone to shut up but I want to know what happened when I left him then Johanna smirks" Come on handsome , for me " Johanna has been flirting with him all along and Peeta is adding fuel to her flirting by giving her some sassy comments and lightly brushing her hair off her eyes or a little caress at her cheek. I feel jealous every time her hands touch his shoulder or neck but I stay calm and convince myself that I can't be jealous of my best friend "OKAY but for you" Peeta says winking towards Johanna.I try to brush it off and position myself to carefully listen to him as he starts "but this is a sad one so I might need some time after it ends" Peeta says slipping his fingers in Johanna's hands as jealousy rages inside me but I try and contain it as he continues "I am a baker's son and a painter . My dad was my hero . I met the love of my life when I was five years old" he says and pauses for a minute a smile forming on his lips" When I first saw her, her hair was in two braids and she was wearing a red dress she sang in the morning assembly and I knew I was a goner but I didn't talk to her just tried to gather the courage , When we started 6th grade her father died and I tried to become her moral and emotional support and tried to slip her money or food or make her feel loved and needed and sometimes I got beating from my mother to give my money to her . My mother is a very cruel lady who used to beat me up for stupid stuff and emotionally made me feel useless and my brothers always took her side too afraid to stand up for their little brother.I soon became 16 trying to live with my mother and confess my love to the girl of my dreams and soon later I was successful to confess my love to her and she said she felt the same way . We dated all through High school and then college ,with her it was just magnificent . We started living together I worked at an gallery , she worked at a Music coaching classes ans it was all on the cloud 9 but as soon as I got on one knee she disappeared and left me there. After she left I fell into alcohol then Depression but neither seemed to take the pain away so I went back to my roots of releasing pain and stress . Baking. I went back to my parent' bakery and worked hard but not hard enough for my mother . One day I was working when something went wrong and I ruined a cake so my mother started hitting me with her hand then her shoe and then rolling pin after a couple of hits she tried to hit me with an heavy rod near her when my father tried to save me and got hit . My mother left and I took my father to the doctor but he was already in coma and soon he died and after his death I lost it and I started getting high but one of my uncle's .Uncle haymitch made me go to a 'magic working' therapist and I went there for two years and the pain of my father's death faded but others remained so one night I went to a bar and got drunk and screwed a girl. For those few seconds when I was with her I felt new and fine again so I started doing it more and now I am a recovering playboy who was an alcohol,drug addict and depressed person" Peeta finished and excused himself from us as we sit there stunned
Peeta makes his way back and we all try to muster up and normal face but no one can't . Peeta sets himself on the chair and sighs "Okay guys you can ask me questions?" he says and finnick lets out a breath followed by a question"Do you still love your dream girl Peeta?" "No , she taught me many things but took my ability to love: he says and takes a sip of his drink . The mood finally lightens and everybody is talking like normal people now . Johanna is back with flirting knowing the fact that Peeta was a player and she is making normal conversations with him . BUT I can't take it anymore his words whirl around my head . I am about to cry and I run out , out of the bar and I make my way back to my house still running I get in and crash on my bed crying . This is all my fault .I took the ability to love of the most loving person away and I left him to face all of that alone because I was afraid that I would turn into my mother . My stupid fears took the real , happy , caring and loving Peeta away and I sob in my bed thinking of how selfish I am
After crying for the whole night I have made up mind that my job from now on is to make Peeta he was before, to teach him how to love and make him realize how much I still love him even if I am not his choice in the end...
