Chapter II

A Clash of Realities

It was a nice day in Arlen. Hank Hill was reading the newspaper, when he heard a knock at his door. "I'll get it." Hank said, answering his door. He saw a very old Asian man with a very long beard. "Oh, are you looking for Kahn?" Hank said to the Asian man. "No. My name is Shujinko. I am looking for anti-life. I heard from The Elder Gods that it rests inside a fat man in a white shirt around here. You look like the right man." Shujinko said. "What the hell are you talking about?" Hank said. "I'm talking about extracting the anti-life from you and sealing it away so that no one could ever find, and use it." Shujinko said. "That's just asinine. Why don't you go back to the crazy house?" Hank said. "I'm going to have to very carefully slice your stomach open, and pour its contents into a suitable vessel." Shujinko said, pulling out his sword and a jar. "You're going to do what? That's it, you old geezer! I'm kicking your ass!" Hank shouted.

Hank swung his fist at Shujinko, until Shujinko blocked the blow and kicked him into the air. "Gwa!" Hank said, bleeding all over his kitchen. Shujinko pulled out his swords, put one right where Hank was going to fall, and impaled him. "Strange. I don't see any anti-life." Shujinko said. "That's because you're making up nonsense, you jackass! Now take me to the hospital!" Hank said. Shujinko acted as though he was going to punch Hank in the face, but instead slapped him on the cheek. "This is very important, and you are obviously not the man I am looking for." Shujinko said, pulling his sword from Hank's fat gut.

"Hold on, mister! Here in Texas we have a thing called justice! Hoo yeah!" Peggy said. She overheard the fight from the backyard. She had huge shotgun with her and it was aimed right for Shujinko's head. The old man dropped his swords. Hank felt emasculated by this, like his wife could defeat Shujinko, but not him. He felt weak and powerless, both against Shujinko and next to Peggy. Hank tried to stop his wife from making him feel small, even if it meant letting a crazed old Asian man run free with a sword. "Peggy, don't shoot him. I think he might have a point." "Your husband is wise. He knows what hangs in the balance." Shujinko said, his hands up.

Peggy put her gun down. "Who are you and why did you stab my husband?" She asked. "I was looking for a man with anti-life inside him. Your husband fit the description, but he was not the one I was looking for. I apologize. Do you want any sort of compensation for your grief?" Shujinko said. "I want you in jail! That's where people who stab other people go in Texas!" Peggy shouted. "If I were to go to jail, then the world as we know it may be no more." Shujinko said. He reached into pockets and grabbed some koins. "This should cover your husband's injuries and then some. Goodbye." Shujinko teleported away.

Peggy walked over to her bleeding husband. "Oh you poor, thing Hank Hill. I just can't believe someone would do something like this to you." She said. "It was only a misunderstanding. If Kahn taught us anything, it's that Asian people do things differently where they're from. We should respect them as good citizens and be as polite as we can be, even if we're getting stabbed in the gut." Hank said, trying his very best to prevent his wife from trying to emasculate him again. "You're right, Hank. I was a violent, ignorant fool." Peggy said. She helped Hank into the truck and began to drive him to the hospital.

Bobby and Luanne were watching the fight from inside. "Wow. Dad got stabbed." Bobby said, worried. "I know. He's gone through a lot. I mean, he lived through propane explosions, being a hostage, fighting Kahn in a stick match, truck crashes, and the year 2000. I guess it's not that surprising he can survive getting beat up by an old man with a sword if he's lived through all of that." Luanne said. Bobby felt a lot better now. "You're right. Thanks Luanne!"