**Authors Note: Thank you to Stephenie Meyer who created the wonderful world of Twilight. If it weren't for her, this story would not exist. I do not in any way, shape or form own anything created by Stephenie Meyer in any books from The Twilight Saga. Any new characters in this chapter were created by me, are completely fictional, and are owned my me.**

CHAPTER TWO

My blue eyes sparkled as I watched the falling rain patter against my window pane. I hugged my knews closer to my body as my mind wandered to the previous days' trip to the beach. I reached for my cheek, the very cheek that his soft lips had brushed ever so gently. I brushed it gently as my body shifted on the window seat I was perched on. The rain seemed to fall harder as his perfect face materialized before me. His auburn hair gently falling into his deep green eyes that always seemed to be watching me. I could still feel his warm hand in mine and hear his velvet voice when he said my name. I felt myself reach out to him and then as quickly as the vision had appeared, it was gone. All I was left with was an empty room and somber feelings. I gazed around me, my large bedroom a glow in warm dancing light that escaped from the fire that was crackling in the fireplace near my queen-sized four poster bed.

I stood slowly, smoothing my fuschia coloured skirt out grimacing at the wrinkles I had caused from sitting for so many hours reminicing about fonder days. "Mother would be annoyed", I thought. I walked gracefully to my cherry wood roll-top desk and pulled out my newest leather-binded journal I just recieved in a parcel sent by my brother. A smile played on my lips as I thought of how soon I would see him again. The first World War was nearly over, how wonderful for our family to be together once more. Still smiling, I gently opened the journal, relishing in the crisp white paper before me. Gently dipping my pen in the small built-in ink-pot I began to write.

Sunday, May 26, 1918

It's late in the season for rain, but I am happy for it. I find I am in dire need of my sins to be cleansed. So many thoughts swirl through my mind. It's not proper in most a natural mind to have a young lady to think as I do, but I cannot help the desires I try to so deperately suffocate.

He's there every waking minute, even if I don't able him to be. Mother despises my reading, but even then in my solitude of Shakespeare I find him there. His piercing eyes watching me from not far off. Oh Edward, my darling Edward. Don't you see what you have done? You've made me fall in-love with you.

I mustn't think such things, especially write of them. Father wouldn't be as angry as mother, but a man of small fortune would never do, couldn't do. Not for a Lancaster.

I set my pen down, knowing I had finished my thoughts in their entirety. I blew gently on the page I had just finished, reading as the ink dried. Closing the book, I slipped it into my desk's secret compartment and locked it, savoring the cold quarter-sized key in my hand momentarily before slipping it into my pocket. I stood carefully and eased to the door, still deep in though. I started down the main staircase when I suddenly heard my mothers' crisp footsteps in the hallway. Then before I could make it all the way down the stairs, I heard the bell ring for the door. I delibrately took my time, being careful to not make a noise behind my mother. She slipped gracefully into the foyer, I watched and waited patiently. I could hear muffled voices, nothing was audible until my mothers' piercing scream.

"No, no, no." She cried, I glanced behind me as my father came into view, his face stern but worried. I watched him open the door to the foyer, revealing my mother clasped to a tall dark-haired man in military uniform. Her sobs were more than I could handle, but I stood frozen. "Not Andrew. Not my boy. He's too young to die". I felt the tears begin to fall then. I now realized what she was speaking of. She was speaking of my beloved older brother who was meant to come home from the war. My mother released herself then, when she felt my fathers' hand on her shoulder. He grasped her close as her sobbing shrieked louder. I saw her then, her face muddled with despair--so much sadness. Her eyes wild with grief found my over-brimming ones, but she did not come to me, she did not comfort me. It was too much to bear and so I ran. I ran as fast as my wobbly legs would carry me. I was out the back door, through the sun porch, and down the pebbled walk before I realized it was still raining and I was soaked.

The rain seemed to let up the closer I got to the beach. I couldn't hear the seagulls today, but the waves were significant enough to know I was close to my most favourite place in the world; Lake Michigan. I pulled my light wrap closer to me as a chill ran through me. My pace didn't falter as my boots hit the wet sand, I continued to run. My face soaked with rain and tears, I suddenly stopped and faced the vast body of water. I opened my mouth and screamed as the thunder crashed around me . And then I began to walk slowly into the angry waves, my tears streaming from me like blood from a wound. Before I realized what was coming, he pulled me to him. His strong arms wrapped around me tightly, his whispers in my ear. I couldn't hear a word but I grasped at him, my sobs floating around us as the water swirled around our ankles. He lifted my chin, my sobs softening in response to the action.

"Edward," I moaned, my eyes wildly searching his more than concerned face. "He's dead. Andrew is dead. The war --"

"Shush now my darling." He responded soflty, pushing my wet hair from my face. "I'm here." He kissed my forehead gently and I found myself calming in his embrace. His lips found my cold cheek and then the other. He reached for my hand, but I pulled away. I turned from him, my eyes still full of tears. I could feel the pain now. The pain was slowly making its way up past my stomach, into my heart. It was so heavy, so dark. I spun around to face him, my once blue eyes beginning to gray.

"I cannot love you." I shrieked at him, my hands pulling at my hair. "I will not love you. I'm dead now." His lip twitched and he looked down at his hands. "I'm dead to you. Goodbye Edward." I didn't hear his words as I ran from him, nor was I able to invision his perfect face, or his warm embrace . All I could hear was my heart thudding in my chest, my heart that was now broken. Shattered by the war that had claimed my brothers' life and had betrayed mine.

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