disclaimer: I do not own anything. Sadly and this fic is legal!!!!
Chapter 2: everything i'm not.
I woke up and looked at the Calander. Today was the 17th of December which gave me less than two weeks to loose 5 pounds. I took a deep breath because I knew inside what I had to do today. I knew I would have to check the scale. Inside my body was going crazy I have never been this, freaked out about going on a scale before, then again I never spent half the night making a diary before.
I looked at the clock and it was around 9:27am. I stretched and walked over to the bathroom.
"Duh."I mentally slapped myself. In one of the websites I checked out it said that I had to pee before weighing myself in the morning. I then heard my phone ring..Lily.
Then again Lily always calls, and can't a girl pee in peace? I looked at the bathroom and stared at the scale. It never looked that intimidating before...c'mon Miley! Toughin up what's the worst it can say?
"Great talking to myself?"I asked the empty bathroom and I stood in front of the scale and took a deep breath. I stepped on the scale and closed my eyes when I heard it beep. I opened it and my eyes popped open.
132
"WHAT?!" I screamed out really loud. I quickly felt as if I was going to cry. My body became panicky. I began to pace back and forth in the bathroom. What was I going to do? How could it be possible for me to have gained that much weight? I mean I know I have been eating? But Lily has too? How is it? Why does? How come?
My head was officially out of sync. I was 5'5 and I weighed 132. I didn't even know it was possible for me to get to 132. I didn't look 132? Did people see me as 132? Could they tell I was 132. The number was spinning in my head as I began to look like a crazy person. I was dumbfounded and apart of me wanted to rip the scale off from the ground and throw it out the window...was I too late to be saved? I rushed over to the computer and began to type in : Anorexia tips.
Knock Knock.
My whole body jumped and I felt my heart go straight to my butt. I turned towards the door and realized I had tears in my eyes.I cleared my throat.
"Yeah?"I asked as I wiped my tears away and minimized what I was doing on the computer.
"Miles? You okay?" I heard my daddy ask.
"Yeah daddy it was just a spider, don't worry I smashed it." I answered back.
"You sure?"Daddy asked me again.
"Yes." I shouted back as I felt my heart go back to it's steady beat.
"Alright well breakfeast is gunna be ready in a couple of minutes so come down now please. I invited Lily over." My dad said before going back downstairs.
For some strange reason when he said he invited Lily over a little pang of annoyance hit me. I wanted to be alone today to figure out what I was going to do, knowing Lily she wanted to go shopping for Nick, or to go hang out with him and Kevin not that I minded it;s just that I couldn't have Joe see me like this. I couldn't have him see me like this at all. I glanced over at my cell phone and saw the text I ignored earlier from Lily.
Miley!! I so have stuff to tell u! Im going over hopefully ur dad is cookin sum in moon 2 eat! c u inabit!
I groaned and rolled on my bed possibly thinking of all the fatty foods my daddy could be making. For sure pancakes, which isn;t that bad, with bacon,eggs, sausages,ham,grilled cheese....wait why is my mouth getting watery those foods are bad..hello?!
I looked over and grabbed my Diet Diary and began to write.
I have no idea what to do or what to think. My mind is going crazy and I don't know why. I'm still the same sane Miley except more confused than ever before. How is it possible for something to make me so...emotional?
"MILES! LILY IS HERE AND BREAKFEAST IS READY." My daddy shouted from downstairs.
"Alright!"I shouted back. I took a deep breath and began to walk downstairs. I had to eat healthy which meant I could have some toast with jelly and a bacon with a tiny bit of egg. With a tall glass of orange juice. I could do this.
I walked downstairs when I smashed into somone.
"Ouch! Jackson!"I groaned.
"Jackson?"
My eyes popped open when I saw Joe Gray standing in front of me with a cute little smirk on his face.
"Daddy didn't say you were coming."I said feeling nervous.
"Did he have to?"Joe asked me as I struggled for an answer.
"I-"
"C'mon let's go get some food, i'm starved."Joe said as he went behind me and pushed me to go faster to the kitchen. I went to the kitchen and as expected Nick was there too and Lily was eating way too fast;sign for she is nervous.
"Finally."Jackson said as he poured in milk in his cereal bowl.
"Very funny."I shot back as I took my seat next to Lily and...AHHHH besides Joe. All of a sudden my hunger grew from this tiny kitty to this huge Lion.
"Sweet Niblets!"I hissed to myself.
"What?"Lily asked me.
"No nothing continue...uh eating don't forget to swallow."I said as I tried to look at Lily pulverizing everything in sight.
Nick laughed,"Wow seriously where does it all go?"
"Beats me but i'm glad it goes somewhere." Lily smiled and bearly noticed Nick was talking to her, and on cue began to cough.
Nick then patted her back as Lily's coughing ceased I tried not to laugh at Lily's blushing face, but Joe beat me to the punch.
"Classic."Joe laughed.
"Huh?"Nick asked confused.
"Nothing fro-bro and eat yo' pancake."Joe said as he stuffed egg in his mouth. I laughed at this and suddenly began looking at everyone's eating habbits. It was sick it seemed everyone was just stuffing thier faces...just throwing all those calories in thier mouths. I looked down at all the food my daddy served me, this was way too much. I began cutting my pancake into small pieces, I read when you do that and eat slowly you get full faster. So I mean I don't wanna be hungry and eat something more later. I didn't realize how quiet I was until someone tapped my shoulder. I looked up to see Joe Jonas looking at me with concern.
"A lot on your mind?" Joe asked me.
"A truckload."I answered as I dipped my pancake piece into the syrup and chewed.
"Lily was telling us how you wanted to audition for the Hollywood Record contest."Joe said to me.
"Well yeah I mean I do. It's the same one you guys are going to audition for right?" I asked him.
"Yeah kinda neat huh? Maybe one day instead of playing at fair's and small gigs we will be famous and imagine opening up for a nationwide tour?" Joe asked excited.
"Yeah and then it will be me Miss Miley Stewart singing in front of thousands of people and I'll be famous like you guys." I said as I thought about the dream.
"Yeah and we will be famous friends and get caught by the paparazzi and our names in lights." Joe added to our interesting conversation.
"Wow, to think we might be close to getting there."I said as I thought about it.
"Miles, your pretty,talented, and a wonderful girl...I know you'll get there."Joe said to me as we continued eating.
"Thanks."I smiled at him. Joe grinned before going back to eating his food. I sat there and imagined it...I had to make my dream come true, I had to be famous....I had to impress Joe and make him proud...I just had to.
4 hours later Malibu Mall
I couldn't stop thinking about breakfeast. I had eaten a toast with jelly,eggs,and three pieces of bacon. I felt as if it were stuck in my stomach forever and no matter what I did it wasn't going to leave.
As we all walked in the mall I kept on looking at the skinny girls around us. Thier tiny legs, thier small hips, thier colar bones popping out. Shouldn't I be like that?Shouldn't I be looking like them? I wanted to leave so I could go home and exercise before I ate dinner the only thing that was keeping me here was Joe. Why did he have such a grasp over me.
He looked extra cute wearing his tight dark blue jeans with a grey right muscle shirt and his leather jacket, not to mention he wore his little grey bennie on which made him look so irristable...
"Salted?"
I looked up to see Joe staring at me.
"What?"I asked him.
"Yeah I want a pretzel, and I was asking if you wanted it salted or unsalted."Joe said as we were walking towards the Pretzel stand.
"No it's fine, i'm not hungry." I said as my mouth watered inside. Joe bought his pretzel and took a huge bite the smell of it made my stomach growl.
"Want a bite?"Joe asked as he licked his lips. What's better than a sexy Joe Gray licking his lips offering a bite? Uh Nothing.
"I'm fine."I smiled as we started walking. Nick and Lily were walking ahead laughing about who knows what.
"Nick bought Lily something."Joe said as he took another bite.
"Really?"I asked.
"Yeah, can't tell you what though."Joe smiled as he winked at me. I felt my cheeks blush but I looked down.
"What?"Joe asked.
"Nothing, it's just I don't know the whole christmas love thing is so romantic."I said. Joe cocked his brow and smiled.
"I agree with you. I can't wait till you see the present I got you." Joe said.
My heart fluttered."You got my gift already?"I asked.
"Yeah of course."Joe said as he finished up his pretzel.
"Well I feel dumb, I haven't gotten yours." I said to him. He looked at me sadly and looked down.
I felt liek the single most horrible person in the world I opened my mouth to appologize when he smiled and looked up.
"Geez Mi you swear that I care about a present."Joe laughed.
I pushed him and he grabbed me and pulled me close to him, we were both laughing and it felt so good for him to embrace me that close. Suddenly the laughing stopped...I looked up at him and he looked down at me. My heart stopped yet at the same time beated the fastest it's ever beaten, I felt beauitful in his arms, happy, accepted,me...
"I still need to get you one."I whispered to him considering we were so close.
"What if I tell you what I wanted."Joe said shyly to me.
I smile crept on my face,"What is it that you want?"
"All you need to do is..."With that Joe closed his eyes and I closed mine leaning in.
"Joe!"
We both jumped as pushed each other away to the sound of Nick's voice. He was bright red and so was I.
"You gotta see something."Nick said as Lily stood behind him.
I wasn't angry as she joined us for the rest of our mall trip. I wasn't angry when she came down to my house. I wasn't angry when my dad said she was as polite as Aunt Dolly was at church. I wasn't angry when Jackson called her hot.I wasn't angry that Lily thought she was awesome for liking sports,or that Nick liked her for her musical talent. I also certainly wasn't angry as Joe sat next to her talking to her about music.
"So yeah I moved here about a week ago but my family bearly came today to finalize packing."She explained.
"It's so awesome to see you again."Joe said as she smiled.
"Miley Joe told me a lot about you is it true you want to be a famous singer?"Demi asked me.
"Yeah it's true."I tried my hardest to smile at her.
"That's amazing. I've just play at coffee shops here and there, I also love acting too."Demi told me.
"That's really...great."I smiled at her. The one thing that was bothering me the most was her, her body figure. She was 5'2 and she was so tiny. Her legs were small and thin, her somtach was small her body was almost fairy like. I was jealous and all the instruments she played she was everything i'm not.
"Well you guys dinner is ready, I made lemon chicken with mashed potatoes and ceasar salad."Daddy announced.
Everyone got up, I was hungry and haven't eaten since breakfeast, and lemon chicken was certainly healthy. I made my way and sat between Lily and Joe then of course Demi sat on the other side of Joe. I carefully watched as everyone served themselves some food but I paid attention to Demi's choices. She got a normal serving of salad and helped herself to some diet coke. She smiled as she started eating, why didn't she get any of the chicken and mashed potatoes? She then got two spoonful's of mashed poatoes and put it on her plate. She then took a breath and began to eat. Like word vomit I couldn't help but blurt.
"Aren't you going to get some chicken?"I asked.
Demi smiled,"Well I don't really eat meat that much but geez your salad looks the best."
"Thanks Demi."My daddy smiled.
"Well you're really missing out, this lemon chicken is good."Jackson said to my disgust,mouth full of chicken.
"Yeah I'm mostly a vegetable person, I know weird right?"Demi laughed.
"No don't worry we all have our favorites."Lily commented.
Is that how Demi is so skinny? She doesn't eat meat?But the lemon looks sooo goood.
I looked at the chicken on my plate and was so hungry I wanted to deviore the chicken on my plate but I also wanted to loose weight and I'd rather skip out on some chicken than gain an extra pound. I started eating my salad and then moved on to the mashed potatoes. I was really enjoying it, and I guess as dinner went on and making jokes with Nick,Lily,and Joe I ate my whole serving of mashed potatoes...not what I really planned.
After dinner The Gray's and Demi had left so she could talk to Denise and Paul Gray i'm guessing they are all close or something,
I sat on the couch and opened my diet diary.
Okay i ate a toast,two eggs,three bacons,2 scoops of mashed potatoes and a salad. How many calories was that?
I heard Lily come and I quickly hid my diary.
"Hey Mi, i'm beat."Lily smiled as she sat next to me.
"Yeah me too...hey Lil's do you mind going home today I kinda just wanna sleep."I told Lily.
"Um yeah sure no problem, you okay Mi?"Lily asked.
"I'm fine it's just that i'm kinda well tired and I have a headache."I said to her quickly.
"Okay but Miley don't worry Joe doesn't like Demi."Lily said getting up.
"Who said that I cared?"I asked looking as Lily walked towards the door.
"Alright....just saying."Lily laughed before walking out.
Was I that obvious? Well right now I didn't care all I cared about was running on the beach. I went upstairs and put on my running clothes. I quickly saw my computer and decided to look at the websites for pro-ana. A word I learned last night, it made it easier to find the sites I was looking for. Suddenly I went on to this site that had bolded BMI calculator.
"Are you obese?Overweight?Normal?Underweight?or Anorexic?"I read aloud.I clicked on it and it asked for my height and weight.
"Okay i'm 5'5 and 132 pounds." I hated typing that number,"Calculate." In a second i got 22 was my bmi..I was in the normal catagory which was 18.4-24.9. I wanted to be 18.5 that sounded almost underweight but still normal. 22 was too big of a number. Suddenly I felt inside me the urge to run a mile, or 10. I minimized the window and shouted to my daddy.
"Taking a run be back in 30 minutes!"
"Kay bud!"He shouted back.
I went outside in the cold and felt the cold slap my skin. My lungs quickly felt like fire and every step I took became harder than the next one ,the only thing I could think of was getting that audition,making Joe proud,being skinnier than Demi, and loosing weight.
So thanks and I hope you enjoyed the little MOE fluff but yeah don't worry this is going to end up a Moe story and even though I get little reviews I dont
care I have been dying to type this story and now that I am comfortable with adding my life into it I can finish it. So thanks so much and if your gunna favor this please review it first. Thanks.
^_^
