GangstaSummoner: Thank you so much for the review, story alert and favorite story. It keeps me inspired to write. Good news! Jacob appears in this chapter! Yay! ^_^ And I will be introducing a new, mysterious character, who might become a main character. I haven't figured it out yet. Anyway, enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or the characters.
Chapter 2 – Mental Institute
I'm mentally insane now? That's the first thing that came to my mind when I awoken from my loss of blood/suicide attempt. That is the first thing that came to mind when I saw Charlie sitting in a chair next to my bed and he told me that he is sending me away. That this may be the last time we will actually get to talk. Even though I am doped up on meds, I am fully aware of what is happening to me. "It will be for your own good," he said. "And if you show a lot of improvement they might let you come home early." I did not like the way my dad was making a crazy house look like a 5-star hotel. Give me a break. "What do you think, Bella?"
I groggily rolled my eyes, keeping quiet. I am a little pissed off because I am still alive; and a little pissed off because I know Alice is the one who told him; and a little pissed off because he wants to send me to a mental institution. What the fuck? I glanced at my wrists, which were wrapped in white bandages and sighed. I just am completely bummed out. I said in my typical insensible voice, "I am perfectly fine."
His eyes fell to his lap and then he reached for my hand. "Don't say that. If you were fine, we would be at home right now. If you were fine, I would had never found you in a bath tub of your own blood! So, do not tell me that you are fine, Isabella!" I'd never heard Charlie sound so angry before in my life. He is suppose to be the calm and composed one; not the worrywart like my mom, Renee. His voice grew softer, returning to his inside tone of voice, "If you don't want to talk to me, at least talk to a therapist. I want the old Bella back…We all do."
I could see my father's pleading eyes as he gazed at me, begging me to do this for him. I have never wanted to hurt Charlie or Renee. And I knew that taking my own life would hurt them dearly, but…I just…I just had to end it all. The pain that I feel inside. The hatred and my wounded heart. Everything in Forks reminds me of him! Everything! It makes me feel like my heart is being hit with daggers every single day and then set ablaze. Set ablaze like they did to Edward. I cringed at the thought. I can't take it! I hate it!
Maybe a mental institute is the right thing for me. I was crazy enough to fall in love with a vampire. I was crazy enough to try to take my life because of it.
"Fine," I whispered while squeezing Charlie's hand and shrugging my shoulders. "I will go, but for how long?" I just had to get away from Forks for awhile and let me tell you, Jacksonville is not going to help either.
"Well, Carlisle suggested two years. Before you get upset and what not, he only suggested that because he wants to make sure that you are fully prepared for when you return to society."
I groaned loudly, "Two years? What about high school and graduation?"
"You can always get your GED."
"When I am twenty?"
"Yes, Bella, when your are twenty." He smiled at me and I returned the favor the best way I knew how. "That's my girl. I miss seeing you smile." He then kissed me on the forehead before leaving my hospital room.
Just great. I am a mental case and a soon to be twenty year old super senior. Oh the joy!
Two days later Carlisle decided that I was no longer a threat to myself. Charlie and Renee, who flew straight out to see me, and Billy were the only ones who came to see me off. Carlisle said his goodbyes for the family while examining me one last time and Jacob was no where to be found. I thought he would have shown up with Billy, but he did not. It had been three months since I'd last spoken to Jacob Black. It was the day of my birthday; the day everything started to go downhill with Edward and I; and the night I decided to run off to Italy to save my vampire lover. I sighed, shaking the vivid image out of my head. That is one day I did not want to remember.
While waving bye to my parents and Billy; I climbed into the back seat of an all white mini-van outside the hospital steps. I am grateful that they did not strap me down and shove pills down my throat in order to sedate me. I took one final look back at my family as the van pulled off into the highway and heads straight to Seattle. I had to keep reminding myself that I am not crazy, this is only rehab.
Hours later, we arrived at Hillside Mental Institution just outside of Seattle. We turned off the main highway and on to a long, winding gravel road. I bounced up and down as I stared at the two, female escorts. One blonde and the other a brunette. The brunette looked over her shoulder and gave a warm smile. "How are you doing back there, Isabella?"
"Just call me Bella and yeah, I am fine."
I found it strange that one of them decided to break the ice after all this time. I saw the blonde glance at her rearview mirror and then back at the road. I could tell that she was not fond of mingling with the patients. It is not like I am a complete nut job. I only had a mental break down. "My name is Hannah," she tilted her head towards the blonde, "and this is Naomi."
"Nice to meet you both."
"Well then," Hannah brushed her hair out of her face, "do you have any questions before we get to Hillside?"
Naomi sighed as if she were frustrated. "She can wait until we arrive, we are only her escorts, Hannah."
What is it about me that blondes did not like? I ignored her, tilting my head against the window, letting my deep brown eyes focus on the many rich green trees that still had their leaves. It seems as if this is becoming a repeat of when I first arrived in Forks. The sky was cloudy and gray, gloomy somehow. Just like today. Perfect for my mood.
"Hmm…I guess she doesn't talk much," mumbled Naomi with a little sarcasm in her voice as Hannah turned around in her seat.
"We're here," said Hannah.
I leaned to my left to get a better view at my new home. Straight ahead were black iron wrought gates forming a H and S in the middle. It seemed like this place had been here for fifty years or more. As the van slowed down and we stopped at the security guard booth just outside the gates, Naomi flashed him her I.D., before he let us pass. My eyes lit up as I gazed at the old five-story building with it's light to dark gray bricks and black borders around the large number of windows.
The road was no longer gravel, but a tan, cobblestone roadway that looped around a huge, circular fountain just outside the main building. I could see the name "Hillside Mental Institution" hanging just above the entrance in white letters. Naomi climbed out of the car along with Hannah and I did the same. I had no clothes or anything, I was told that they would supply me with everything that I needed. The cool winter air whipped against the back of my neck and I could smell the rain in the air.
"This way Bella," said Hannah as she opened the door to the entrance for me.
I was expecting madness when I stepped through the front door of Hillside. You know, like in the movies, crazy people running down the hallway, some trying to talk to you, others screaming. I got exactly that, times one hundred. My ears started ringing as a high pitch scream could be heard down the ivory hallway, almost like nails on a chalkboard. It was not long before I heard small footsteps, followed by louder ones and the screaming coming closer.
Like a breath of fresh air a little girl came into view. She was a little thing around the age of nine with a golden-brown complexion and long, sandy brown hair that fell just at her shoulders. She was dressed in a light pink dress, a pair of white tights and snow boots. As she reached me, she stared up at me with the strangest golden eyes that made her look almost wild. She smirked licking her bottom lip, "Tasty."
"Anya! Get back here!" yelled one of the nurses from a far. The young nurse with deep green eyes and extremely short brown hair, who seemed to be in her middle twenties, groaned loudly as she approached us. Out of breath she said, "I am so sorry." She reaches for the little girl known as Anya's hand, "You must be the new girl." She looks me up and down, lingering over my disheveled hair, white T-shirt, jeans and sneakers. "Where is your uniform? And why do you like that?"
Anya wiggles around at the nurse's side, staring at me with curiosity in her eyes. "She is not a nurse," said Naomi, eyeing the little girl as well. "This is Isabella Swan, your new patient."
"Oh? Depressed and suicidal, right?" The nurse looked at me again as if she were remembering my file. I didn't say anything. "Doesn't talk much…o…kay. This way please."
I followed the young nurse closely. "Good luck, Bella!" yelled Hannah as I walked away.
Naomi nudged Hannah in the side. "Why the hell are you rooting the suicidal chick on?"
Hannah smiles, "Because I think that Bella is a cool person. I don't believe that she is as crazy as everyone thinks. Some people like to grieve in their own special way."
Naomi sighs, "Listen to me, razors blades plus depression equals one insane chick."
"Whatever, Naomi. She is going to get through this, I just know it."
Whatever the case maybe, I am really going to lose my mind in this place. I learned that the nurse's name is Catherine and that she worked with the rehab patients on the fifth floor. I followed her towards the elevators in the lobby, near the stairs; Anya was still playfully moving at her side. The little girl hummed softly as the elevator passed each floor, a wicked grin on her angelic face.
Ding! The elevator stops and the metal door opens into the rehab ward. Catherine steps off just as Anya swings her arm around and instantly her mouth made contact with Catherine's wrist. Catherine gasped out loud as Anya bit down harder into her cream colored skin. I wasn't sure if I should pull the little girl off and risk being bitten as well. Catherine gently, but forcefully pushed the little girl back. That is when I noticed about four bandages on Catherine's arm and a few drops of blood around Anya's mouth. Weird. She licks her lip devilishly before running down the hallway to the left. I could still hear her small feet patting against the white tile floor. "Are you okay?" I asked, stepping out of my down in the dumps mood for a second.
"Yes…Yes, I am fine," she reached into her pant's pocket of her all white uniform, pulling out a band aid to add to her collection of bite marks. She crumbled the thin paper in her hand, tossing it into a nearby trash can. "Come with me. I need to sign you in."
The rehab ward was set up almost like a hospital or a nursing home with the nurse's station in the middle, a small lounge nearby and the patient's room on both sides of the ivory walls. Paintings of hill sides, flowers and golden plains hung throughout the wing. I found it to be quite quiet on this floor, unlike the first floor. Peaceful somehow.
Catherine walked around the desk, grabbed a folder from out of one of the filing cabinets as if nothing was wrong with her arm. "Okay, Isabella your room number is 502 and your doctor is Sandra Phillips." She glanced up at me for a moment, I guess waiting for my reaction. My face was emotionless. She then started to write on the pile of papers on the desk. "Your first meeting with Dr. Phillips will be in the morning. I will come get you. You are also assigned to group therapy. Are you okay with that?"
I honestly did not see how group therapy was going to help me with my problem. I had nothing to talk about. It wasn't like I could tell them that my ex-boyfriend is a vampire and he died because of a misunderstanding. That he was killed because of his own selfish ways and leaving me in a world where he did not exist. It was so stupid of him. The Volturi had no sympathy for him, even though they admired his talents. To see such a tortured soul, they immediately put him out of his misery and I was too late.
The metal doors swinging open, Edward is on his knees, Felix's massive, cold hands are on each side of Edward's face and then…snap.
Catherine snaps me out of my chilling memory, her voice high with concern. "Isabella?"
I blinked twice, shaking my head from side to side. "Huh, what is it?" I was so out of it that I could not remember her question.
"The group therapy. Are you okay with attending?" She raised her thin eyebrows, the lines in her forehead wrinkling just a bit.
"Okay," I answered.
"Good, it is mandatory anyway. I just wanted to make sure that you were not like most of the patients we get in here. You know, the unwilling type. They are a handful."
"I bet," I mumbled.
"Okay then," she points down the hallway to her right. "Your room is the last door at the end of the hall. All your necessities are already in your room, clothing, toothpaste, toothbrush, deodorant, shampoo and conditioner."
I turned in the direction she was pointing to before she started to talk again. "And you have a room-mate, Anya. She can be a handful, but I think you can handle her."
"Thanks," I whispered, before slowly walking down the hall.
I wondered why a nine-year old was in a rehabilitation center, in mental institution. If she was crazy, shouldn't she be on one of the other floors, in a padded cell, wearing a straight jacket? Anya did not act as if she had a mental problem. She reminded me more of a very hyperactive child craving attention. I had to admit that there was something a little strange about the girl. That look she gave me, those golden eyes and the way she licked her lips while saying "Tasty." Was she a cannibal? Was she locked up because she may have possibly killed a family member and ate a part of their body? Seriously, kids these days are losing their mind.
While standing outside the door of my new home for the next two years, I took a deep breath. I wasn't sure if Anya was back in or not. I did not see her slip by while Catherine was giving me the run down. I stared at the light brown door, slowly wrapping my hand around the knob and pushing it open. I was expecting the room to have white, bare walls, white floors and beds with white sheets and comforters. It was nothing like that. The walls were pink and the floor had white carpet; and on each side of the room was a twin size bed with pink and white reversible comforters over it. Beside each bed was a desk, complete with a lamp and a closet on both sides of the door.
Wow, did I just walk into a college dormitory?
I opened the closet on the left, it was empty. So, I figured the other side belonged to Anya. One step at a time, I took in my surroundings. A light smile pulling at my lips only for a second and then instantly fading away. It was too pink for my liking, but I was grateful that it was not blue. I sighed, while walking over to the window, bending the thin blind down to look outside. My room looked over a small rose maze, far off from the main entrance. I hadn't notice it when I arrived.
I turned around, plopping down on the edge of my bed. The springs squeaked under my weight. Was this the right decision?
"Of course it is."
My head whipped towards the door. As clear as day, there he stood, Edward watching me with gentle eyes. "What do you know? You're the reason why I am in here."
He said, "It is for your own good."
Look at me. Talking to a dead guy as if he were really there. Talking to him as if I knew his ice-cold body would move towards me and wrap his arms around me, as if he were here to comfort me. I wanted him back with me and this how I get him, as a hallucination that only crazy people could see. It only proved to me that I am losing my mind. At this very moment I am going crazy.
Jacob's POV
I am such and idiot. I just couldn't go see Bella that night and I damn sure could not go see here when she left the hospital. I didn't want to go through that pain again. That agonizing pain that I felt when she left me to go save her leech of a boyfriend. Rest his soul…What am I saying? What soul did that mind reading Cullen ever had? Hell, if he had a soul and a heart, he would have known how his absent would had effected Bells. Too bad that he is dead and gone now.
When I think about it, it just pisses me off. I didn't know what was going on back then. I didn't know that she was madly in love with a filthy vampire. I didn't know that all the Cullens were vampires, my arch enemy. When Bella left, it was like something came over me. My body trembled and I felt super hot, like I had just thrown my body into an erupting volcano. The more she denied my pleas, the madder I got and watching her drive off into the night with Alice, the fairy-like one, I lost it then, but I held it until I reached the woods behind Charlie's house. My body pulled, twisted and lengthen in all kind of ways until I was on all fours.
I wasn't me anymore. I was a…thing.
It scared me, but lucky Sam was nearby. It was as if he smelled it in the air, my transformation taking place. He was standing in the middle of the woods, naked from what I could tell. I heard a rumble of disgust in my throat as I turned my massive head to the side, not wanting to see his trunk and bells.
"Jacob, I know what is wrong with you," said Sam as he slowly walked towards me. I could hear his bare feet breaking limbs and crunching dead leaves, until he was about five feet from me. "It is about time that you join us."
Why the fuck is he naked?! And why am I a fucking wolf?!
"I guess, it might be easier for me to show you instead." He takes a step back, his arms and hands trembling and then his body began to distort. It was almost in slow motion as he hunched over, his back curving, his legs elongating and then shortening, his skin looking almost as if it were pulling away from his flesh and then in a flash he was a full blown wolf. His thick black fur ruffled as he stepped forward, his deep brown eyes looking almost onyx to me. This is how we transform, he said, and communicate.
What the hell?! I jumped back, startled by the random intrusion of Sam's voice in my head. What was that?
We are telepathic. We are a pack. This is how real wolves communicate with one another. He stepped forward, watching me intensely. They use body language and scents and things of that nature. We just have the ability to read the other members mind.
I knew that something was up when Paul, Quil and Embry started to distant themselves from me and started following Sam wherever he went. But I had no idea that this was the reason why. I stared at him curiously. What do you suppose to be? Oh-great-and-powerful alpha or something?
A smug look formed on Sam's face and he sat back on his hind legs all tall and mighty. Exactly and because of that you have to obey my every command.
I scoffed, Don't give me that bull.
You will. Sam's voice rumbled in my mind and I felt the need to submit to his command. It was like a heavy weight being pushed down on me and I instantly fell to my stomach, my head on the ground and my nose sucking up the scent of wet grass and leaves. You can't tell anyone about this. Only the elders of the tribe know about us. He eyes me closely, Including Bella. I don't care how much she fits in with the supernatural world.
What are you talking about? I sat up on my hind legs, giving him a confused look. I didn't have a clue what he was talking about.
You know the story, Jacob. The one about the 'cold ones'.
Yeah and the whole superstition thing about the Cullens being…I guess, vampires. I stared back at Sam, his expression was not changing. I could see it in his eyes, urging me to understand the situation. The Cullens…They are vampires?
They are. He repeated the words, making the legend all the more real to me.
Bella? She knew?
Sam only nods, I figure at one time she did not know, they may have told her or she figured it out on her own.
Fuck! I howled out, whipping my head up into the air. If I had only known, I would had never let her leave. Who knows where they were off too and I damn sure knew that it was not California. Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!
Jake, calm down.
I began to pace around in a circle, my rusty colored tail swaying behind me. You saw it, Sam! She's gone with that vamp to God knows where!
Relax, Jacob!
Instantly, I gave into Sam's order, obeying our alpha. I whimpered softly as I stared back at him.
We need to phase back. We need to go see our brothers. In a flash of an eye Sam was already back in his human form. It didn't seem to bother him one bit. "Practice makes perfect. Now you try. Eventually, you won't feel a thing when you phase. Besides, it should come naturally to you."
Natural my ass. I tried to mimic what little movement I saw Sam do, but that did not do any good. I sighed. I was mad when I phased the first time, so calming down might change me back into a human. So that is what I did. I took a deep breath and eventually changed back to my old self, but for some reason I still felt pissed off. As a result, I ended up phasing back into a wolf in a blink of an eye. Crap!
Sam laughed loudly, crossing his arms over his chest. "You definitely need to work on your anger, Jake."
And this is why I consider Bella, and not the Cullens for being the reason why I phased for the first time that night. I love that girl so much that she turned me into a freaking werewolf. My dad said that she will be in Seattle for two years, I probably will never see her again. Her smile, those deep brown eyes, her smooth skin, the way she tends to always land on her ass in rain, sleet, snow, hell, even on the hottest of days. I am going to miss everything about her.
"Hey! Jake! What are you thinking about, man?" asked Quil as he walked up the steps to my home. He nudged me on the shoulder, as I leaned against the railing of the porch.
"Nothing," I said.
"Yeah, right. You had a perverted look on your face." He leans in closer, eyeing me and then a huge grin crossed his face. "Are you thinking about boning Bella? Gotta dig the crazy chicks."
Before Quil could say anything else, I had my arm wrapped around his neck in a head lock. I wondered how long would it take me to render him breathless. "Don't you dare talk about Bella in that way!" I yelled falling down to one knee and Quil wrapped tightly in my grip.
He chocked out, "S-Stop, stop J-Jake! I-I can't b-breathe!"
I released him, watching him fall to the wooden boards. Serves him right for saying those things about Bells. Sure, Bella is hot and all that. I mean, I've thought about what it might actually feel like to have her naked body against mine in the worst way possible, but I know that it would never happen. Bella isn't a wild and freak nasty type of girl.
Quil laughs loudly as he stares at me from the floor, "There you go with that look again!" His voice became like a sing-a-long as he spoke, "Jake wants to bang Bella! Jake wants to bang Bella!"
I kicked him in the side while rolling my eyes, "Shut up, Quil!"
GangstaSummoner: I hope I did not confuse anyone during the Jacob's POV part. I wanted him to phase for the very first time after reacting to Bella's turns him down and stuff.
Don't forget to review people! Bye!
