A/N
Just because I keep forgetting about putting up disclaimers, here it is : Company of Marvel owns the X-men. I own all ideas of original characters besides. And, of course, this work. Sorry for not writing sooner, I've gotten a joband I was trying to get into the groove before attempting to have too much on my plate. I think it'll be okay, though. I should start updating a little more frequently, and I'm going to start a new original story at fictionpress soon, if nothing happens to stall me. Hope you all enjoy the chapter!
"How long have you felt this way?"
"It started a few weeks after we got back from the other world."
"I see. And can you tell me how long you planned to keep this a secret from me?"
Professor Xavier looked over the desk at me, waiting for my response.
"I didn't want to bother anyone about it." I said, focusing on a particular spot of the wood grain.
"Danny, you are a part of this household whether you feel the desire to leave or not. That is not going to change. It isn't as if you were the first mutant that wished to leave this place. I only worry about what will happen to you when you do. You're not even eighteen yet."
"I know."
"Maybe what you need is just a change of surroundings. It's been awhile since you've seen your family, why don't you go visit them?"
I considered that for a minute. All my brothers and sisters would be older now. I suppose I should make an appearance so they wouldn't forget me. But, somehow, I don't think that will help my present situation all that much.
"That sounds really great Professor."
He rose an eyebrow at me. "Then you'd better go get packed. I'll tell Logan to get the X-jet checked."
"So soon?"
"There isn't anything that needs to be done here at the moment." He gestured to his clean desk. "And if you feel this would be good for you then we should do what we can to make you feel comfortable again."
"Thank you." I got up to go.
"Danny."
"Yes sir?"
"Please, please try to stay out of trouble."
"I'll do my best sir."
I hurried out of the office and went to my room. I patted Doggy on the head while I packed a bag of clothes.
"Mum?"
"Hello Julian. Back already?"
"Too many humans, me and Jaime had to come back. Where are you going?"
"To visit my parents." I turned around and then craned my head back. For a little tot that I could carry around in my arms without trouble a year ago, he sure had filled out quickly. "Try not to cause too much trouble while I'm gone?"
He lifted one ear while studying me. "Mum, are you unhappy?"
I looked him straight back in the eye. "Yes. But it's not because of you or anyone else. I just need something that I don't know about yet."
He nodded. "Is Doggy going with you?"
"Yes. You'd better keep the twins with you though. I don't know when I'll be back." I shoved the last things into the bag. I'd always been a pretty light packer.
Julian looked slightly sad for a moment. I reached up and wrapped my arms around his neck. "We all leave at some time. It won't be like I won't come back, so don't you worry about it. Besides, if I know you're here, I'll have all the more reason to return. Be good, Julian."
"Okay Mum. I love you."
"I love you too." I released his neck and grabbed my bag, shouldering it. "Don't let Kurt eat all the cookies. Make sure you get your fair licks in too."
He grinned and slipped to the side to let me through. Doggy padded out after me. I went down the stairs only to see the rest of the household sans Mr. Logan standing in the lobby.
"Hey, we heard you were like, going on a vacation!" Kitty chirped as I reached the foot of the stairs. "So we came to wish you luck! Of course, you'll be back in like, a few weeks, so it's probably not necessary, but you know!"
"I do?"
Snorts and giggles filled the room as Kitty tried to explain herself. After awhile, I got a goodbye from everyone and they wished me good luck on my trip.
I hope their luck isn't wasted.
It was a short trip, all things considered, and I soon found myself being hugged and made over by my mother (I'm so happy to see you!) and patted on the head by Dad (I think you got shorter, sweetie!). The sisters and brother gave me tentative hugs, nervous at seeing their older sister again in so long.
It feels wrong, somehow.
Mr. Logan went off as soon as he saw I was fine. He had to go back to the Institute to take care of things there (Don't get into trouble).
We all ate dinner, we talked about lots of things. Jared made a pretty picture of a house. I was in it, but I was standing outside with a shovel in a stance that looked like I was threatening the old willow tree. I don't think he got over the rattler incident. The twins are always getting A-marks in their grades, and the other kids are doing much the same. My older siblings were successful in their endeavors.
I'm still stagnating.
"Honey, are you okay?"
I jerked quickly out of my thoughts. "Yeah. I'm fine, mom. Just drifting off for a second."
"I see." She was looking at me closely then. I returned the look, and she blinked. I looked back down at the food. Chicken Cordon Bleu, good stuff. Too bad I lost my appetite.
"It was a long trip." I intoned to anyone listening. "I'm kind of tired. Can I go to bed?"
"Of course honey. I was just saying to your dad that you weren't looking especially well."
I got up without a word and went back to my room. Doggy was on the floor, sleeping away. I stepped over him and sunk down onto my old bed without getting undressed.
Doggy had it easy. Even though he was bigger than when he left, the siblings still recognized him and loved over him. They were wary around me.
I pushed everything out of my mind and tried to sleep.
It was black and gold.
It moved like a deer, but it couldn't be one. Not with that coloring. It had gold hooves, gold horns. Its pelt was so black it was as if it was part of the shadows.
I watched from above. I watched as it picked its way through the grass gingerly. It was so silent-it left no trace on the ground and not one sound to my ears. I didn't even know if I had ears. For some reason, that thought didn't seem to matter.
It kept moving. Now it was moving towards me. I could barely make out the shape of the head, the eyes set in that black fur.
Blue on blue. Why is that thought so familiar?
And why is it that I'm having a craving for bugs?
I bolted upright in bed and almost fell off.
"Ugh…" I rubbed my eyes. "That was weird."
Doggy looked up at me and cocked his head to the side.
"I think I might have gotten some stray thoughts from some place. Probably a bird. Or a shrew. I'm not sure."
Doggy whined.
"I'm fine. It was just weird. I think they might have been dreaming and I caught their dream. I mean, Bobby once iced his room over in his sleep. Kitty phased through the ceiling. Jean once made a clock in the hall go flying into Jubilee's door. Remember that? It was after she went to bed angry when she had that fight with Scott. Heh. Professor Xavier told her she was never allowed to go to sleep angry again, remember? It's not unheard of to use our powers when we sleep."
Doggy gave a small growl of assent and got up and paced around the room. I looked at the clock on my desk.
Three-thirty a.m.
"I gotta stop these early morning wakeups. C'mon Doggy, let's go walking." I slid out of bed and slipped on my shoes.
I walked silently through the house and went out the backdoor. It was cold outside. I took a deep breath and felt the cold rush into my lungs.
It felt pretty good.
I started walking, and before I knew it I was at the fence. It had become more run down since I'd been gone. I could practically hop over it and wander off into the grasslands beyond.
I have to admit, the thought is pretty luring…
I shook my head. I couldn't go wandering off in the middle of the night and not come back. My parents would have a fit, not to mention everyone back at the Institute.
I stretched my arms a bit then turned to walk back to the house. Doggy trotted beside me, and I scratched his ear.
"I want to go away." I whispered to him. "I can't stand these places anymore. I haven't even been here a day and already I'm thinking about running off in the night."
Doggy stopped to whine.
"It's nothing you can do. I think…Doggy, maybe I should make a decision."
He cocked his head at me.
"Maybe I should leave. I mean, Mom and Dad and everyone are glad to see me, I know, but are they happy with me around? It's not like I can live here, and even if I could, they'd never feel right with me hanging around. I think it's time I left home. Both of them." I added.
He whined again and thumped his tail anxiously.
"You know you're always welcome to come, Doggy."
He barked gruffly. A light went on in the house and Mom poked her head out the window.
"What are you doing out there!" She demanded. "It's freezing! Get back inside."
I looked at her and then back to Doggy.
"I guess…there's no time like the present, hunh?" I walked back into the house. Doggy followed. Mom began to fuss around, making coffee.
"Do you want a cup?"
"I don't drink coffee."
"I know."
The silence dragged for a second.
I opened my mouth to speak.
"Something's bothering you." She said before I could get anything out.
"How could you tell?"
"I'm your mother. I know everything. It's the right of all mothers."
"Then how come I couldn't tell that you knew?" I demanded. She stopped and pressed her lips into a thin line.
"You've been a…mother for a year. To one child. That doesn't give you the right to know everything. That gives you the right to be a teen mother."
"I didn't think you disapproved of Julian that much." I said quietly.
"I don't. I disapprove of you being a mother at sixteen, no matter the circumstances. Now you're over seventeen and you're going to run away." She sighed and rubbed her temples. "I never knew having a mutant child was so hard."
I felt a flicker of rebellion in my chest. "I can't apologize for anything I do."
"As you shouldn't." She poured herself some of the black coffee. "But sometimes I still wish you would."
"When did we get into this conversation?" I asked. "I can't remember ever thinking, 'I think I'll get my mom upset and bring up painful conversation'."
"Don't get snippy." She took a sip of coffee and grimaced. We watched each other for a few more moments. Then she sighed.
"Don't leave just yet. Wait a few days. Then you can…go. If you promise to at least come by and say hello sometime. Inform us that you still live."
It looked so hard for her to say.
"Why are you being so accommodating if it hurts you like this?" I demanded.
"You've been disappearing ever since you were four. We couldn't stop it them and I can't stop it now. When you went quiet those years, I knew that one day you would be gone and it scared me. Now I know you're going and I'm still scared. But I know that you can take care of yourself. You've been doing it since you were four."
"Okay." I felt a lump in my throat. Up and leaving in the middle of the night would have been so much easier. "I'll stay awhile. And then I'll visit from time to time."
"Good."
We said nothing, then she reached out and pulled me into a hug.
"We love you. Try not to forget that when you travel out there."
"I won't. I promise."
Thank you, I thought as I hugged her back.
Asteria: Thanks for reviewing! I had some trouble getting her started, but I'm hoping that this story will be finished and end well. Heh, I'll try to keep her out of trouble. Cooking college? Is it fun? I'm studying for a science major myself. Can figure out my emphasis yet though.
PrincessOfWildfire: Glad you liked the conversation! So you can relate to the character? That's good! I'll try to keep the story as interesting as possible. And I take it you like Grown Julian since you wrote it down, so thanks about that too!
Arin Ross: A purpose...you know, you're right? The purposes aren't clearly stated in the other ones. I'll try to get it out this time. Hmm...you know, I read how they (pigeons) did the dance, but I've never actually seen it. I can picture it clearer now though. I'm glad you liked the dialogue and the pigeon!
Please leave the reviews in the magical drop down box! And thank you very much for reading!
