Chapter 2 – Malpractice.

Ocelot nodded slowly, watching Snake's reaction carefully.

"You kept Liquid's arm? After what it did to you last time?" Snake asked.

"It has enormous sentimental value. I had it in my attic. I kept it preserved with a cryogenic canister in case I would ever need it again because I don't prefer prosthetics and I already know that Liquid's tissue is compatible with my body."

"Yeah, wouldn't want the Patriots to gain complete control over you with a prosthetic, would you?" Meryl asked.
"Precisely. Here's a free piece of advice for you two. Stay away from flu shots."

"What if you start acting up again?" Snake asked.

"I have medicine for that. Are we done wasting time?"

Snake and Meryl nodded reluctantly.

"There's something in the basement of this hospital that I need," Ocelot said. "It's called Mend. It's a serum full of nanomachines that sends the immune system into overdrive. One shot will guarantee that I'll have a speedy recovery."

"Why haven't I heard of it?" Snake asked.

"Our dear friend Naomi Hunter brewed it up in her cauldron," Ocelot said. "When I saw her name on the project, I had Mend classified as an alternative treatment. Even if Naomi hadn't been involved, the drug still would have been deemed far too effective and suppressed by those at the top of the healthcare industry."

"How cruel," Meryl said. "Is that why there isn't a cure for cancer?"

"Of course. Cancer is the one of the most passive aggressive forms of population control available. Anyway, Mend is available at this hospital, but it is rarely used. I asked for it by name and they haven't given me the form to sign that's designed to scare me into not using it despite the fact that it is relatively harmless. Snake, do you have the mental capacity to realize what I would like you to do?"

"Yeah, I get it," Snake replied. "Is there anything else I should know?"

"It costs five hundred dollars a day for me to stay here. Despite that, none of the nurses have been willing to give me a hand job."

"Maybe you can get a doctor to give you one," Meryl said.

"So I should just waltz right into where they keep their supplies and keep my eyes peeled for a box full of needles?" Snake asked.

"Oh, excuse me. I thought I was talking to Solid Snake. Who might you be?"

"Fine. Meryl, see if you can trigger Liquid while I'm gone."

Snake made his way back to the elevator. The safest way to go about this would be to pretend he was maintenance, which was infinitely less conspicuous than knocking a doctor out and stealing their uniform. Then again, he would be out of luck if the door to the supply room was locked. Perhaps he could get Curt to help him by admitting that he was indeed one of the most wanted terrorist in the world. Snake checked a clock on the wall and noted that it was still relatively early in the morning. If a courier was in the process of making deliveries, he could stuff himself inside a cardboard box and get to the supply room that way.

Acting like a janitor or a doctor seemed like the right thing to do. He adjusted his posture as the elevator arrived in the basement. Even without a uniform, he looked like he belonged where he was going. If questioned, he would say that he misplaced his cell phone somewhere in the basement. A sign on the wall just outside the elevator made it clear that only hospital staff were allowed in the basement. A door that was locked electronically blocked the route leading to all the goodies. Snake spotted a badge reader and pressed the button for the third floor. He had an idea of where he might find the key.

The staff hub was currently being watched by one nurse who got up and ran to the staff bathroom when Snake passed by. He walked behind the desk and found a locker room. The door to the room was being held open with a doorstop. He quickly searched through the unsecure lockers and found a lanyard with a temporary badge dangling on the end. Snake stole it and shoved it into his pocket. As he turned around to leave, a female doctor entered the room and gave him a suspicious look.

"What's up?" Snake asked.

"Have we met before?" the woman asked.

"I don't think so. I'm new here and I'm on call right now. I just finished visiting one of my patients. I can't seem to get away from this place."

She smirked, which was a good sign.

"I'm Dr. Iroquois Pliskin. Cardiology. And you are?"

"Keri Nanako. Psychiatry. Are you looking for something?"

"Yeah, I thought I left my copy of 1984 in here. I was going to let Curt borrow it since he really digs that book about that secret agent man."

"James Bond?"

"No, the other one. I forget his name. Hey, may I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"What's up with the old Russian in 1301? He's got a bit of a mouth on him."

"I guess you haven't gotten the memo yet. Kaufmann is in charge of him. Nobody else is supposed to interfere with his treatment. That's an order from the director."

"Weird. He asked me to look at his hand. This Kaufmann fellow certainly didn't lead the surgeons who stuck that donor part on. Did he?"

Keri stepped in a little closer and kept her voice low.

"There's a lot of gossip floating around about this whole thing. None of the surgeons here operated on him. I know that because I have a few friends down in that department. If I were you, I wouldn't even look at the memo. Pretend you didn't get it. He's going to sue the pants off this place as soon as he gets out of here."

"Did you get his name, by chance?"

"Yeah, it's George Gurlukovich."

Ocelot would probably hang Snake if he gave the man too much rope. Snake was certain that Ocelot couldn't be that unoriginal.

"Thanks for the heads-up. I gotta get going, but it's good to meet you, Keri."

"A pleasure, Iroquois."

Snake left the room and rubbed at his throat, grimacing in disgust. Acting always left a bad taste in his mouth. He needed a cigarette so bad that he seriously considered lighting up in the elevator until he realized that he didn't have a pack on him at the moment. The locked door in the basement was no longer an obstacle. He spotted a security camera positioned just above the other side of the door monitoring everyone in the concrete hallway.

The place was deserted. He passed a morgue, an autopsy room, and a room full of old hospital records. There was also a dark room with no door that contained the hospital generator. For whatever reason, a very large firefighter's hammer was leaned up against the generator. At the end of the hall and around the corner was a room marked all in capitals as STOREAGE. Snake wondered if they had deliberately misspelled the word to create an inside joke. He swiped his badge across the reader and stepped inside.

The storage room was spacious and well lit. Most of the items he passed were basic medical supplies. He didn't need scalpels, adult diapers, or spare syringes. There were a few empty cardboard boxes in the room with him. They silently teased him, tempting him to give into his fetish. Snake kept his head level and resisted the urge to sit in one of them for a few minutes.

A portion of the room containing prescription medicine was sectioned off by a cage that he unlocked with his stolen badge. They sorted the medicine alphabetically. Mend was missing. He spotted a small table tucked into a corner with a plastic bag on top of it. Inside were several blue syringes labeled as Mend. They were capped, so he stuck four into his pocket without having to worry about stabbing himself.

On his way out, Snake heard the door to the room open. He quickly leapt inside a cardboard box as whoever had entered made his way hastily towards the drugs. Through the slit in the side of the friendly corrugated paper, Snake spied a doctor dressed in a gray suit that seemed to convey a great deal of his personality. Snake heard plastic rustling and figured that the man had taken the sack of Mend.

"Do you have the money?" the man asked, obviously talking to a cell phone since he didn't seem like the type of person who would keep an imaginary friend. "I know I'm late. I'm a doctor. What did you expect? I was working with a burn victim. I have the medicine. Do you have the money?"

A moment passed, which was fine with Snake because he could spend all day in this cozy little box that smelled like rubber.

"Is that all you want done with him? Alright. I'm on my way. Have the money ready."

Though the box was slowly intoxicating him, Snake knew that this man had to be Kaufmann. The shifty doctor passed by Snake's hiding spot with the bag of Mend in tow. Obviously, he didn't intend to let Ocelot have any of it. This was quite interesting. Snake made a split second decision to find out more and jumped out of the box. Before Kaufmann could turn around, Snake had him in a headlock.

"You have ten seconds to tell me who you were just talking to or I'll break your arm," Snake said in a tone that convinced Kaufmann that he wasn't kidding.

"Please don't hurt me!" Kaufmann managed to say.

"Five seconds."

"Okay, okay! He didn't give me a name."

"What does he want?" Snake asked, tightening his grip around Kaufmann's throat.

Kaufmann struggled for a moment until Snake let up, allowing him to speak.

"He is paying me and the director of this hospital to ensure that the Russian in 1301 has a slow recovery. I'm not sure who he is. He called me as soon as the man was admitted to the hospital and made me an offer. I don't know how this guy knew my number, but I do know that he isn't bluffing. All I have to do is drop the bag off and I get my money."

"Where?"

When Kaufmann wouldn't answer, Snake slammed him up against a wall and pinned his arm behind his back.

"Wait! Old downtown behind Fiterific, the gym on sixth!"

That was all he needed to know. Snake put him back in a chokehold and didn't release him until he passed out. He briefly considered taking the Mend from the doctor, but then he would be getting involved with something he didn't need to be a part of. This was Ocelot's problem. Snake stole the doctor's cell phone, which he intended to give to Ocelot since he could possibly trace the number of the person Kaufmann had been speaking with. That was as far as he was willing to go to help him. Snake searched the doctor for anything else that might arouse his curiosity. Aside from a bag of mysterious powder that didn't look like cocaine, Kaufmann wasn't carrying any secrets.

With that taken care of, he hurried back to Ocelot's room. Kaufmann wouldn't stay unconscious for very long, although Snake doubted that he'd come looking for the person who jumped him. The door barring the public entry into the basement opened and a nurse entered the corridor with him. Snake looked away from her and tried to keep his face hidden as he walked toward the elevator. This wasn't good for his blood pressure and neither was the speed at which the elevator operated. He imagined two unmotivated men operating a pulley at the bottom of the shaft and mashed the button for the third floor so much that it broke.

Making his way back to Ocelot's room was simple enough.

"How's it going Liquid? Don't tell me you don't recognize your older brother," Snake said.

"Nice try, but he isn't cracking," Meryl said.

"Here," Snake said, throwing the stolen cell phone at Ocelot. "Somebody bought your doctor. He's taking all the Mend in this hospital to Fiterific."

Snake took out the three syringes he had recovered.

"I hope this is enough. You made it sound like you only needed one shot."

The cell phone began ringing, blaring a rendition of Popcorn through its tiny speakers. Ocelot used his good hand to answer the call. He didn't say anything and waited for the person on the other line to start speaking. The volume on the phone wasn't high enough for anyone other than Ocelot to hear what was being said. Snake and Meryl watched as Ocelot turned red with rage. Ocelot threw the phone at the wall in front of him because pressing a button to end the call wasn't assertive enough.

"That son of a bitch!" Ocelot roared.

"If you're mad now, you're going to be a lot angrier in a second here because I'm not giving you your Mend until you tell me exactly what you're doing in Alaska," Snake said.

"Yes!" Meryl exclaimed, clutching her fists together and shaking with excitement.

"Forget it! I don't need your help! I don't need anyone's help! I'll do this myself if I have to!"

Ocelot pulled off all the wires attached to him and got out of the bed. Though moving had to cause him a considerable amount of pain, Ocelot managed to maintain a minimal amount of dignity by roaring like some wounded animal instead of groaning like a sissy. He stumbled over to the medicine cart and began preparing a shot of morphine. Snake wanted to keep the pressure on him, but he didn't think it was going to get him anywhere. Ocelot could just wander through the streets in a gown until he arrived at another hospital if he didn't arrange to be treated privately in his own home.

"Fine, you win. Give me your arm," Snake said.

"Get bent!" Ocelot said as he jammed a needle into his right shoulder.

Snake moved in and Ocelot stumbled directly into Meryl, who knew what was going on and caught Ocelot's arms. He struggled, but couldn't quite overpower Meryl in his current state, which was severally emasculating.

"This is like pulling teeth," Meryl said.

Since Mend was made of nanomachines, Snake figured he could just stick Ocelot anywhere and they would do whatever it was that they would do. He poked Ocelot in his right arm. Ocelot went limp, which Meryl took as an effort to get out of her hold. Not wanting to lose her front teeth if Ocelot tried driving his skull into her mouth, she let him fall straight to the floor like a sack of wet oatmeal. Ocelot blinked rapidly for a moment and then let out a low groan.

"Mend is also an opiate, isn't it?" Snake asked Ocelot.

"Blow us a couple of spit bubbles if it is," Meryl added.

"I hope you die of breast cancer," Ocelot told Meryl. "Boss, could I trouble you for a ride to the nearest seedy motel?"

"Who?" Meryl asked.

"Whichever one this one is, I don't care. They all look the same, anyway."

"Yeah, I'll take you. We should probably hurry," Snake said.

Snake offered to help Ocelot up, but Ocelot insisted on doing it himself.

"One second," Ocelot said as he moved to the cart of drugs and grabbed a handful of morphine vials.

"Problems, Revolver?" Meryl asked.

"This junk goes through my system like ice cream."

Snake put a hand around Ocelot's waist and let the man lean into him for support while Meryl took the lead and pointed to a stairwell that they could take to avoid drawing too much attention.

"Am I going to have to sleep with a gun under my pillow tonight?" Snake asked as they went down the stairs.

"No. It's my problem. It's just somebody I should have killed when I had the chance."

"Yeah, I know how that goes."

They weren't running into anyone, which was good. Ocelot didn't have to tell anyone that he was refusing treatment. If their luck held out, Ocelot would get away with stealing morphine. Snake almost wished somebody would stop them and have Ocelot arrested because it would be fun to watch. Once they reached the main floor, they encountered three nurses and Curt before they made it to the front door. Ocelot hid the morphine against his belly and glared at their potential opponents in a manner that immediately frightened them off. He looked rather pleased with his ability to intimidate the staff of the hospital. Snake assumed their behavior had something to do with what Keri had told him, but he didn't say anything and let Ocelot have his moment.

Outside, it was freezing. Overcast clouds threatened to dump snow on them at any minute. The gown Ocelot was wearing provided no protection against the cold. He was also beginning to stumble as Mend continued fiddling with his central nervous system.

"I call shotgun," Meryl declared.

Ocelot ignored her and limped into the parking lot.

"Where are you parked?" Ocelot asked.

"Where am I parked?" Snake asked himself.

Snake could hear Ocelot's teeth chattering from where he stood. He knew where he had parked his vehicle. Watching Ocelot suffer was far too amusing. Ocelot took the lead and began searching the parking lot himself.

"Don't you drive an Audi?" Meryl asked, winking.

"Yeah, it's dark blue," Snake replied.

"There's your stupid jeep," Ocelot said.

Of course Ocelot would know what he drove. What he smoked. What he ate. What he bought off the Internet. All Snake could do about it was worry.

"You sure you want to tag along?" Snake asked Meryl as he unlocked the door to the back seat.

"Yeah. I walked here since my vehicle is in the shop."

"Okay. I'll drop you off at your place once we dump Ocelot."