The next day, I found myself extremely nervous. I spent at least three hours fussing over my clothes and trying to find just the right ones. My nails were repainted at least twice and I spent another hour getting my hair just right. Needless to say, I didn't really get sleep, so that led to more time that I had to use to hide the dark bags under my eyes. Really, who could sleep after an experience like what happened the day before?

"Are you ready to go?" one of the brutes called out as I made the final touches.

"Just a sec!"

"Just like a fucking girl," he grumbled to the other brute. Little did he know that I took that as a compliment.

"What the hell's taking you so long!" a deep voice commanded.

My blood ran cold at the familiar tone. Dad wasn't in a good mood so I needed to get my rear in gear. "N-nothing! Coming!" Fuck, he wasn't supposed to be here for a while!

Racing to grab my bag and coat, I sprinted out of my room and ran right into the object of my terror. If I was dainty and feminine, then my father was the image of all that was masculine and coarse. His hands were the size of trashcan lids and calloused enough to hurt as badly when they came in contact with your face. Trailing my eyes up his wide chest and granite shoulders, I gulped as I took in his grizzled face. Years of fighting had left it scarred and with a permanent scowl; I think that there was some nerve damage. Then again, maybe he was always just surly. Looking at this man that was my father, I focused on the only thing that I inherited genetically from him. Artic eyes glared down at me, narrowed like a laser beam.

"Why the fuck are you running late?" he hissed. Usually, he wouldn't care if I was late or not, but something else must be bothering him; naturally, he'd take his wrath out on me.

"Sorry," I mumble, breaking eye contact. I knew that doing such a thing would make him angry, but I couldn't help it. The beatings I'd received from him throughout my life made it impossible not to fear him. His very presence was intimidating.

A massive hand grabbed one of my own and he inspected my perfectly manicured nails. I could feel his frown. "I know that I let you get away with this damn nail paint, but if you're gonna insist on abusing my grace, I have no problems with just ripping them the fuck out. That way you can't waste so much time."

I tried to pull my hand away. Just imagining my nails being ripped out nearly made me sick to my stomach. Especially since I didn't doubt that he would follow through on his threat if the whim ever struck him. "Can I go to school, now?" I tried to add an annoyed tone to that, but I was too nervous and it cam out more like begging. This is why I fucking hated it when the old man was around.

"What kind of pansy are you guys raising here?!" he screamed at my guards. They looked down at their shoes and shuffled nervously. "I'm not around and you let him turn to jelly! There isn't an ounce of backbone in him!"

"I'm just tired," I try, eager to get away from this all.

The loud smack of flesh was my only response. A cry slipped past my lips easily and I immediately cowered away, trying to protect my face. "You fucking bitch! Just like your damn mother!!! Worthless!" He hit me again, complimenting the verbal abuse with the physical abuse. "At least she had more balls than you do! Brought your fucking lazy ass to my door, telling me what to do!"

"I-I'll try harder!" I begged as I slid to the floor, preparing to get into the fetal position if the beating got any worse.

"I've been patient with you! You just fucking turn into more and more of a pussy!" A kick this time. "I swear, if you don't get your fucking act together I'll kill you!!! I'd rather give this business to another damn family than have you disgrace my name!"

If I could have chalked up his tempter tantrum to his being drunk, I probably could've handled the situation better. Unfortunately, he was stone cold sober and I was bruising. My mother must have been a delicate thing. Delicate on the outside, maybe, but Dad was right; she had a lot of guts to come to him with me and demand that I got cared for. Sure, it was for completely selfish reasons, but that didn't really matter. It was her daringness and what my father called "balls". I may have had them literally, but it didn't make me any more of a man. I was too pathetic to be a man and too physically male to be a woman.

"Sir, you've gotten a call," one of his goons interrupted. "It's about that deal…"

Yanking my defending arm down, Dad boxed my right ear sharply before he finally left with a huff. He didn't even break a sweat beating me. Shuddering and trying not to turn into a sobbing mess, I began counting to fifty. I needed to gather myself together; there was school to get to and I didn't want anyone there to see me like this. They didn't need to see how weak I was.

"Hurry up," one of my guards mumbled uncomfortably. They never really knew what to do in these situations and usually only succeeded in making me feel worse. I guess it was the thought that counted.

Soon enough I was being rushed to school. All of the hard work I had put into preparing myself had been for naught and I was left to try to fix it up as best as I could. It was too obvious that I had been beaten, but I would have to play it up as if I had been in a gang fight or something. Hold my head up high, square my shoulders, and sneer at everyone.

As soon as I walked into the classroom, I felt all eyes turn to me. They were all sizing me up, looking for weakness or for fodder for their gossip. My lips were forced into a sneer and I strutted down the rows to my seat. Matt glanced up for a second before turning his attention back to the assignment. In that room full of people, I felt terribly alone.

Halfway through the day, I quit attending my classes. Mr. B would be pissed, but I couldn't bring myself to care at all. With a sour cigarette dangling between my lips, I just sat on the roof of the school. When I closed my eyes, I almost felt like I could throw my worries to the wind and they would carry them off on sympathetic wings. Then, I could be at peace and get some much needed rest. Sadly, things weren't that easy. The throbbing in my ear was a constant reminder of what I had suffered through earlier, and try as I might, it was impossible to ignore those harsh words. My father hated me. Even my own mother never showed interest in me unless it was related to money. Then again, I didn't remember her at all; everything that I knew about her had been told to me by my father. Letting my eyes open and staring at the careless puffs of clouds, I wondered if everything he said about her was a lie.

"Why're you up here?"

His voice alone sent chills down my body. "Tired. I'm just tired."

Matt sat down next to me, pulling out his own cheap cigarette. Everything that he owned was either used or cheap garbage. "Are you okay?"

The simple question caught me off guard. At first, I assumed that he was referring to my bruises, but of course, my overactive imagination was whispering that maybe he was referring to yesterday. After all, he ran away and we didn't see each other for the rest of the day. "What do you mean?" I whispered, refusing to take my eyes away from the drifting clouds.

"Well…you know."

No, I didn't. From the corner of my eye I could see him fidget a little as he struggled to light up his cigarette. The Zippo lighter didn't want to spark to life regardless of how much effort he put into flicking the thing. His sucking on the unlit cigarette didn't help either. As I lazily watched him struggle with something so stupid, my mind was racing. Matt was acting shy, but that should've been expected. He had never been an outgoing guy or even comfortable with things like relationships around anyone but me. For all his bitching and moaning about never having gotten a girlfriend, he never put out the effort for one and instead chose to stay by my side. For years we mocked those who dated and suffered the breakups. Not us, we were together. Together? Together.

Finally dragging my turquoise eyes away from the lazy sky I quietly observed his clumsiness. My own cigarette was burning rather close to my lips, but it wasn't important. We had known each other for years and practically knew more about each other than any married couple in this city. Any time we hung out the both of us would have fun and Matt never let any of my bad qualities chase him away. He would quietly watch over me and I would quietly watch him. What if Matt had just been showing his love for me in his own retarded way? It wasn't inconceivable. Right now, there was a slight blush on his cheeks and even though I knew that he noticed my staring, his hidden eyes refused to glance over at me.

I held out my Zippo. "Light?"

"Ah, uh, thanks." The slightly bent paper was placed against the flickering flame, lighting up quickly.

Wasn't that how it always was between us? I would make the first move and he would take the offer. Wasn't I the pushy, arrogant, and demanding one? Was he expecting me to be the first to ask about a possible relationship? It was hard to swallow down the lump in my throat as I watched him suck that cancer stick so lovingly. Damn it, why was I letting myself get my hopes up?! Yesterday could have been a serious misunderstanding! So what if making out and participating in a hand job required some kind of conscious thought! If it was an accident, I sure as hell wasn't going to make a fool of myself!

Letting the fag slide against my lips, I blew the smoke in his direction and decided to settle this. "Wanna fuck me?" Uh, shit, that's not what I was thinking. Okay, maybe it was, but that's not I fucking wanted to say!!! Matt elegantly choked on his smoke and was sent into a coughing fit that rendered him unresponsive to my question. Great, now I had to rationalize my stupid comment! "I mean, since we're already friends and have known each other for a really long time, and it would be stupid to pretend to start all over just because we're getting involved, so I guess going straight to the meat of the matter might be easier and a lot less stressful, and I don't know why I'm saying so many weird innuendos-"

"Okay, okay," he coughed, looking down at me with his reflective goggles. I could tell that his eyes had watered up from the sound of his voice.

"Okay, what?!" I demanded a little hysterically. My hopes were running high, but I was so afraid of what would happen if he wasn't saying what I thought he was saying.

Wiping some of the spit that had collected on his lips from the coughing fit, Matt looked at me. Surely he could see how nervous I was, how much I really wanted this to work out. If Matt liked me back, there was a chance that I could actually get my happily ever after. Scratching his head a little sheepishly, he turned his attention to his feet. "Um, I mean, I guess it's okay if we…do it. We're friends, right? And, so it's okay for friends to do that."

"We don't have to mess with all that bullshit everyone else does," I agreed breathlessly. "Being friends, we already know each other. I mean, we've been practically dating for years already! Just without the k-kissing and sex."

He blushed and fiddled with a shoelace. "Sure…just like dating."

Wow, he was completely different from the dominant person who had shoved me against the lockers yesterday before proceeding to rape my mouth. Well, it wouldn't be rape if I was willing, right? This Matt was really cute and even more shy that he usually was. It sent warm tingly feelings through my body and the wind couldn't sap that heat away. Tentatively, I reached out and stroked the back of his hand with my fingers. Oh, how long had I been dying to do that, to touch him more intimately.

"So, are you okay?" he rasped, his fingers twitching. My Mattie was nervous. Nothing like the hyper nerd he usually was.

"Dude, you just agreed to a relationship with me. Why the hell wouldn't I be happy?" A giggle escaped and he jerked his attention back to me. I was so excited that I couldn't help but let a little of my true self show.

"Your dad," he mumbled slowly. "He hit you, didn't he?"

Firmly grabbing his hand, I scooted closer to him. "It's no big deal. I can't even bring myself to worry about that when I've got you right here." It was amazing how quickly I turned into a complete and utter sap. I needed to quit reading those cheesy romance novels.

With practice ease, he pulled away the stub of a cigarette from my lips and tossed it to the side before it had a chance to burn my lips. I felt the change in the air around us and shuddered in anticipation. His jaw had set firmly and his hand gripped mine possessively. The charade was over and now we were both letting our true natures show. I wasn't interested in putting up a fight; instead, I wanted him to dominate me, to lead me along. My life was so full of responsibilities and other shit, and for this moment I wanted to feel that burden lift off. He could tell me what to do.

My eyes slid shut as his gloved hand grasped my chin and tilted it up. I felt his forefinger dip between my lips and forcing its way into my mouth. The leathery taste made me groan and I just let myself be washed away by the forbidden feelings. After my tongue stroked the digit for a few seconds, he pulled the finger to the side, stretching my mouth open. Just when I was curious enough to open my eyes, he leaned in and promptly shoved his tongue down my throat. Our tongues tangled beside the digit for a moment before he slipped it out past my cheek, dragging the saliva across the soft skin leading down to my neck. A whimper managed to squeeze past our working lips and tongues as he adjusted his weight and pressed his chest flush against mine. The pressure forced me onto my back and he remained molded to me, cleverly using his tongue to erase any semblance of rational thought. It was just him, me, and that stupid bird sitting on the edge of roof.

This time, the damned bell wasn't going to interrupt our make-out session. His right hand trailed down to stroke my hip bone as his other arm supported his slight weight. I think that I weighed more than he did, but that thought was swept away with a suck to my lame tongue. Compared to him, my mouth and tongue seemed to move thickly and with all the coordination of a retarded kid at the Special Olympics. Okay, at the moment I don't even care if my thoughts were politically correct. Since when was wanting Matt like this p.c. anyway? I knew that if my dad ever knew he would kill me, but what the hell. I didn't care.

A breeze blew past us, unable to get between our warming bodies.

I felt his hand trail down a little further, but I jerked up and pushed his hand away. My blushing cheeks turned a deeper shade as I felt some spit clinging to my chin. "N-not yet," I managed to gasp out eloquently. "Please, at your place," I begged. I didn't want my first time ever to be on the roof of my high school. That was just trashy. A look that I couldn't identify flickered across his face before he stroked my face gently.

"That's okay," he reassured me. "We'll wait."

"Can I come over tomorrow?"

His perfect lips pursed for a moment before replying. I guess he was trying to recall if any of his family members were going to be home. "Sure. I'll take you there after school."

The smile returned to my face and I pressed a soft kiss to his lips. His arm wrapped around my shoulders and I settled easily onto his lap, straddling his thighs. My face eased into the crook of his neck and I allowed myself to drown myself in his musky scent. Almost instinctively, I took some of that soft skin into my mouth and alternated between sucking and nibbling on it. His arm remained warmly around my shoulders and his nose was pressing against the side of my head. I wondered if he was smelling my hair.

Never in a hundred years would I have considered that Matt might be a little uncomfortable or even confused. It was inconceivable that he would regret saying yes to me or that he would regret any of this intimacy. All I could see were the positive things, all of the signs that I wanted. I wanted him to love me just as much as I loved him and things looked to be going in that direction. All of this was moving too quickly and I was getting shit-faced on the high of emotions.

~_~_~_~_~_

My bodyguards were nearly spastic when they found out that I was going to be hanging out with Matt after school. Being my wonderfully negligent self, I didn't mention anything about it until we were heading to his beat up pink Mustang. Matt preferred to call that hideous color a "faded-out red" but it was pink.

"Sir, why didn't you mention this ahead of time?" Jerry hissed as I continued to strut over to Matt's car. "There are procedures-"

"Yeah, whatever. You do what you gotta do, and I'll be hanging with Matt." He glared at me but I shrugged carelessly. "And just stay out of the apartment complex so that you don't get all the druggies worked up."

Yeah, my intentions weren't that noble; not by a long shot.

Jerry cracked his knuckles and fell back with Butch. Matt was already waiting in the car and smoking what had to be his thirtieth cigarette of the day. I had never seen him chain smoke like that before and it was pretty impressive. "You ready?" he drawled as I worked my way around the vehicle.

"I thought you were going to paint this thing red," I complained as I finally slid into the passenger seat.

He glared at me. "It is red."

"Yeah, yeah, keep saying that." I cranked down the window manually to let the breeze cool me off. I always sweated badly when I was nervous.

"You're just color blind," he grumbled.

"Wow, someone's pissy today," I shot back with my own glare. Matt didn't even spare me a glance.

"You sure you aren't the one PMSing?"

"Shut up!"

His lips clamped around his newest cigarette and he reached over to turn on the radio. Annoying techno began to blare from the speakers giving my migraine a new thing to bitch about. My head began to pulse painfully with the beat, but I knew that nothing I would say would get him to turn off that damned music. He was already lost in the world of repetitive beats and corny lines. Besides, he might just raise the volume to spite me. Instead of focusing on the pain, I turned my attention to the surroundings blowing past us.

Gangbangers wandered around everywhere with their pistols shoved down the front of their sagging pants as if that would be intimidating. Du-rags covered everyone's heads, even the poor white assholes pretending to be black. A few girls were on the corner of the street taking turns cursing up a storm about abusive boyfriends or dancing sultrily to the rap that clashed with Matt's stupid techno. People glanced over at us curiously before returning to their mediocre lives. None of them could have even imagined what the two of us were about to do. I could barely fathom that this was really happening, that in a few minutes I would lose my safely guarded virginity to my best friend. Biting my lip nervously, I peeked through my bangs to get a glimpse of his face. Unfortunately, with the sunlight glaring off his tinted goggles, I couldn't read his expression very well. I had grown too used to using his beautiful eyes as a gauge of his emotions but ever since he had stolen those stupid things it felt like a wall was put up between us. I wanted to tear those ugly things off of my Matt and break them into a million pieces so that I could see him again. I didn't like this barrier that had come up between us.

"We're here," he muttered before throwing his fag into the yellowed grass in front of the apartment complex. I stayed in the car for a little bit longer, just trying to swallow down the panic that was threatening to make its presence known. I had asked for this and Matt was expecting it, so there was no use in freaking out now. Still, the knot in my throat wouldn't go away and my stomach churned uncomfortably. I didn't even notice as he stood beside my door staring at me. "Mels, we're here," he said a little more firmly.

Looking up with my shaky expression, I nodded. He opened the door for me, and I grabbed my messenger-style bag before following him into the building. The stench of piss and vomit assaulted my nose, but I held back the gag. I didn't want Matt getting offended. Sighing unhappily, he led the way up the flight of stairs to his family's apartment. I had been here plenty of times before, but this time was different. Stepping into the modest kitchen, I almost felt guilty.

His parents weren't here and the both of us were going to engage in something that they most definitely wouldn't have approved of. I glanced at the sparse pictures that littered the coffee table in their living room. Matt's dad was a still-aspiring rock star who couldn't hit a single note or even play his guitar decently to make up for it. The booze and drugs came with the package, and of course Matt's mother was none other than the stupid groupie who stalked him and ended up getting pregnant. For some strange reason, they had moved in together and proceeded to have a litter of children. Being the oldest, Matt was in charge of his five little sisters, the youngest who would be recently turning three.

"Is your dad at another gig?" I asked even though I knew the answer. His dad and mom were always gone on trips, leaving him to care for the kids.

"Yeah," he answered simply, picking up the dolls and stuffed animals from the floor out of habit.

"Where are the girls?"

"Upstairs," he mumbled. "I've got the only woman who doesn't prostitute and snort during the day taking care of them."

"That's nice," I commented lamely. What else could I say?

"So…" he started, but thought better of it and let the sentence hang in the air. He looked at me and I looked back at him. Neither of us made a move.

I felt all of the nervousness spike up inside of me again, and my throat clenched shut. My hands fidgeted with the strap of my bag, not knowing what else to do. Should I go up and kiss him? Or would it be better for him to make the first move since this was his house? Damn it, none of my books addressed this awkwardness! All of the characters knew what they were supposed to do!

"I bought K-Y jelly," I blurted out. He looked a little surprised and I felt the blush burning against my cheeks. "I mean…we needed lube…"

He snickered and stepped over to wrap me in a comforting hug. "I bet that was pretty embarrassing."

Some of the tension eased out of my body as I snuggled into his arms. "Not really. I paid some prostitute to get it for me. She was too drunk to recognize me."

"I could have gotten it," he murmured against my cheek.

"It's okay. I wanted to."

I'm sure he could hear me swallowing thickly, but he didn't say anything. Instead, he took a deep breath and led me to the bedroom. It was the very same room in which I discovered that I had developed feelings for him. The memory had always been painful for me, but now I could look back on it fondly. That simple and dangerous feeling had led us to where we were today.

"How do you want to do this?" he whispered shakily as we sat on the bed, his bed.

Hell, I could use a bar of chocolate to soothe my poor nerves. "You can be on top," I replied quickly. There was no way on this earth that I could top him. It would be against everything that I was and everything that I wanted. While having sex, I wanted to feel him inside of me, that way it would be much easier to pretend that I didn't have an ugly dick protruding from my groin.

Without any glares to block my view, I could see a look of relief flash across his face for a fraction of a second. "You don't have to, Mello. I can take it."

"No!" I shook my head violently. I would not mess this experience up by doing something so dreadful. "Please, I want you in me," I begged. "You don't know how long I've wanted this!"

Two warm leathered hands took a gentle hold of my face to keep me from shaking a resounding no any longer. He drew closer and pressed a butterfly kiss against my lips. A tear slipped down my cheek as I closed my eyes and just tried to memorize all the feelings bubbling up inside of me. I wanted to remember how it was that he touched my face and how his breath smelt like smoke and citrus.

"Chocolate," his whispered against my lips and if I wasn't already sitting down on his bed, I was sure that my knees would have given out. Somehow, his voice had gotten deep and sexy, and it sent chills down my spine.

"Y-yeah," I replied, leaning forward to taste him again. This time, our kiss wasn't so chaste.

There was no rush as we tangled tongues, but we still found ourselves increasing the intensity of the kissing and petting. His hands were roaming freely over my rear and my hands were feeling up his well shaped chest. Each pectoral was firm to the touch and I could easily feel his perked nipples from the outside of his t-shirt. I guess that his night job at the warehouse had given him some decent muscles and I was thankful for that. Matt's hand teased at my waistband for only a second before it dipped under to grope at my ass cheek. A mewl escaped from my bruised lips and I caught a glimpse of his reddened face. He looked hungrily at me and groped a little more firmly.

"M-mattie!" I groaned pathetically as his other hand reached forward to tweak one of my own excited nipples.

"Gotta take these off first," he mumbled.

Pulling his hands away, he began the task of removing his clothes. Having had fantasized about this moment for quite a long time, I found myself practically drooling as his body was revealed to me. First, the pale torso and arms, and then those still-gloved hands trailed down over the protruding ribs and flat stomach to his belt buckle. With cruelly slow hands, he loosened the buckle and then proceeded to unbutton and unzip his jeans. I wanted to cry in pleasure as my eyes took in the sight of his glorious cock. Since he went commando all the time, I had an unobstructed view of his beautiful member. My turquoise eyes widened as I watched it flush even deeper and swell.

"Oh, ohhhh." I was hardly capable of putting together a coherent train of thought.

Matt blushed a little at my staring and motioned towards me. "Well, I don't wanna be the only one n-naked."

"Ah, oh." I looked down, embarrassed that I had been staring at him like that. Sadly, I wasn't good at the whole foreplay thing. All I could muster up the courage for was to awkwardly strip out of my black skinny jeans and t-shirt while not trying to ogle him as he struggled to unlace his combat boots and finish removing his pants.

When I was left in nothing but my birthday suit, I couldn't help but feel vulnerable. My painful erection was visible to him and he would be able to see all my flaws. My penis was so disgusting, my thighs were too fat, my belly wasn't chiseled or even perfectly flat, my skin tone too pasty, and so much more. I noticed how his eyes widened and I felt my stomach drop. I really was a nasty thing to look at.

"Fuck, Mello," he murmured, those protected eyes roaming over my imperfect figure.

"I-I'm sorry," I muttered, wrapping my arms around myself protectively.

In a swift movement, he tackled me into the soft covers and began kissing and touching me even more feverishly than before. I found myself gasping and mewling uncontrollably, begging for more of the horribly wonderful ministrations. Our naked skin slid against each other and the beginnings of sweat made the motions easier. Matt's hard cock rubbed against my thigh, smearing precum against the hot flesh.

Pulling back to give me a chance to breathe, Matt took the opportunity to ease the atmosphere with his gentle smile. "You're beautiful," he stated simply.

There was no deception in his voice, but I needed to be 100% that he meant those words. I desperately needed to know that he thought I was pretty, that even in my imperfection I was wanted. Reaching up quickly, I snatched his goggles off roughly and threw them across the room. Shocking electric blue eyes stared down at me in surprise and I felt the tears pricking at my eyes. He wasn't lying. "Oh Matt," I whispered, pulling him into a hug. "I love you, love you so fucking much."

"Try to relax," he soothed as I heard him opening the K-Y jelly. "I read up on this, so it should be okay."

I nodded against his neck and shut my eyes as I felt the cool lubricant being rubbed against my virgin entrance. After a few more seconds of rubbing, Matt gently pressed his finger against the muscle and eased the digit into my body. My first instinct was to tense up and push out the foreign object, but I gulped down a few deep breaths and forced my body to stay loose. I trusted in Matt and if he said that I needed to relax, than I was going to fucking relax. He pumped the single finger in and out of me for a few minutes while stroking my belly comfortingly. Then, adding a little more jelly, he pushed in another finger. I let out a little whine, but he didn't stop.

"W-weird," I gasped.

"It's okay," he replied. "Here, try spreading your legs a little more…up…okay, just like that."

With his pillow under my lower back and my legs spread as wide as possible I felt as if I was completely exposed. Considering that I was naked and getting penetrated with his fingers, that shouldn't have been an odd feeling, but it made me uncomfortable. I had been hiding my true self and desires for so long that to be experiencing them full force seemed wrong.

"Stop," I whimpered as he thrusted his fingers a little more deeply into me.

"Am I hurting you?" he asked concernedly.

"N-no."

"What's wrong?" I couldn't find a good explanation, so I remained quiet. "Look, I can't fit inside if I don't do this. I'm too big and it would really hurt if I tried." I nodded. "So, you got to let me do this." A shake. "Melly! Just tell me what's wrong!"

He was getting aggravated now and I grew scared. I didn't want him to leave me, not when we had gotten so close. "Just give me a second, please?"

Nodding patiently, he pulled out his fingers and laid next to me. "I'm scared too," he offered. "If you've changed your mind, I'm willing to take it up the ass."

I knew that he really didn't want to, so I shook my head. Besides, I didn't have any desire to be the dominant one. "I'm such a coward, Mattie. Sorry."

"Don't be," he replied with a kiss to my forehead.

With that settled, I spread my legs again, and this time didn't interrupt him as he finished preparing me. After the third finger, he began prodding around as if he was looking for something. Just when I was about to ask what he was doing, a shocking feeling raced through me; I tensed and my mouth fell open soundlessly. Stupid Matt grinned up at me before stroking that spot once more and eliciting the exact same response. With his evil magic working on me, he finally poured the K-Y jelly over his excited cock.

"Hold my hand," I asked as he positioned himself. Without looking up, he offered his free hand and I took it firmly between my sweaty fingers.

"Just relax; I'll go slowly."

No other words were needed as he pressed into my quivering body. If I had thought that his cock fit perfectly in my hand, then I was sorely mistaken; my body sheathed his member perfectly, as if we had been born as two pieces of a puzzle and were just connecting for the first time.

"Nngh! Ahh!"

"Mel, don't, oh goddd…"

Everything was stretching to take him in and even though there was the pain, I could barely comprehend it. This was finally happening, Matt was really inside of me, having sex with me! My sweating hand was crushing his naked fingers in a death grip that mimiced what by body was doing around his throbbing cock. He pulled back with a bit of difficulty, my flesh not wanting to let him move so easily and I threw my head back.

"Ohhh, mmnnn…"

"S-still too tight," he gasped as he squeezed my hand gently. "Does it h-hurt?"

"Yes," I replied breathlessly, clenching his sheets with my free hand. "B-but, it's ah, okay. You can…can move."

Panting and trying my best to ignore the pain in favor of drowning in the emotional high of losing my virginity to the only person I had ever loved, I looked up into his eyes. At first, they were hidden away as they were clenched shut when he pulled out a little further and dived back into my body, but then the azure irises were looking down at me with an expression of barely contained hunger. A chill ran down my spine as all doubts were wiped clean from my mind. He wanted me. I wanted him.

Our love-making was the most beautiful thing I had ever experienced. Once he found that sensitive spot within my body I was nothing more than a screaming writhing mess that begged for more. There were tears between us, but they weren't sad ones. The magic was just there as he pounded into me with passion that I had never seen in him before. In my throes of pleasure I never once remembered how much I despised my body or how incomplete I felt. The only thing that seemed to register was that this was perfect, that we were just meant to be together like this.

Sweating…

Panting…

Connected...

Breathing harshly after climax had swept us away, I felt his strong arms wrap around my waist and he nuzzled against my slick neck. My own arms felt like lead, but I forced them up and around his neck. His sweaty hair stuck to the side of my face, but I didn't think it was gross at all. After all, his semen was oozing down my thighs, so a little sweat wasn't going to kill me.

"I love you, Mattie," I murmured before inhaling the heady scent of our bodies and sighing against his unkempt hair.

He squeezed me even more tightly in his arms and I felt a kiss being pressed against my neck.

to be continued...