Colonel Riza Hawkeye was trying hard not to let the irritation show, but she'd somehow got roped into having a mock fight against the Fullmetal Alchemist and it would be a bad waste of time. It didn't help that her subordinates flanked her on either side as she walked down the hall, talking too loudly, arguing over who was going to win the fight.
Her 2nd Lieutenant, Jean Havoc, was in favor of the younger alchemist. "Come on, the kid can do transmutations without a circle; and he's young."
Roy Mustang, her 1st Lieutenant and most trusted assistant, scoffed at Havoc and crossed his arms over his broad chest. His voice was smug and full of victory. "Are you calling the colonel old, Lieutenant?"
Riza stiffened to a halt, as did the men next to her.
"Not at all!" Havoc sputtered, seeing the look on Hawkeye's face. The normal placidity of her expression was darkened by furrowed eyebrows and the strong line of a scowl on her lips. Ominously, she removed her alchemy gloves from her pocket and slowly donned them.
"If you two are going to insist on talking, perhaps you should talk about something that won't cause me to accidently snap my fingers in your general direction."
Mustang threw and arm around her shoulder and made a wide sweeping motion with his other arm. "Listen to that! Can't you picture it now, Havoc? Colonel Hawkeye is going to turn that midget into quite the human torch."
"Get off me," Riza sighed, shrugging away from him. Lieutenant Mustang had clearly had one too many cups of coffee this morning; she would have to ration that better tomorrow. He knew how caffeine affected him.
She began to walk again, heading toward the exit so that she could be on time for this mock battle. In honesty, she liked the little Fullmetal kid. Edward Elric was an inspiration despite his age and his determination was something she admired; his overconfident choice to fight her today was a mistake on his part, even if the whole thing had been set up through Mustang blabbing his big fat mouth. She shook her head; that idiot needed to learn better self-control with his tongue.
"When Colonel Hawkeye is Furher, she will rule this nation with an iron fist!" Mustang crowed, pumping a fist in the air as he and Havoc followed behind her.
She rolled her eyes and only barely refrained from gritting her teeth. "Stop displaying my intentions nakedly for all of Central Command, Lieutenant." He was going to get her in trouble with talk like that; the last thing she needed was Furher Bradley hearing that she was out for his assassination.
"And if I were you," he continued loudly, Havoc hanging on his every word, "the day I became Furher there would be changes! That day, all female officers would be required to wear tiny miniskirts!" He punched the air again, looking completely serious.
Riza spared him a look of exasperation; in the back of her mind she was wondering if he wanted to see her in a miniskirt. A small part of her wanted to slap him for having indecent thoughts about his commanding officer, but another part was a little bit flattered. She squashed it all down in a heartbeat; it was stupid to even think that way.
Havoc dropped to his knees and clung to the first lieutenant. "You're a miracle, Mustang! I'd follow you for the rest of my life!"
She only shook her head and continued on, leaving them to catch up when they were ready to start acting serious. Still, as she continued on to the exit, a smile tugged at her lips. They may be idiotic, but they were her subordinates and they were faithful.
"Alright, Fullmetal," she murmured to herself, pulling her gloves down more securely. "Let's see what you got."
