FYI, Sakamoto is a pilot and drops in on Gintoki sometimes.
"Hello, how may I help you?"
Gintoki was back. Hijikata didn't know why he immediately felt lighter. Those forearms were nice. Maybe that was why.
Not that he was attracted to Gintoki.
"You know my order, asshole."
Hijikata narrowed his eyes. Was it okay to ask where he was the other day?
"Right I do, Bijutsu-san."
Maybe not. Or maybe it was.
"Who the hell's Bijutsu?!"
It wouldn't be weird to ask if Gintoki was mad the other day. Right?
"Here's your change."
What even was the social standards to ask these questions? What was he and Gintoki? Barista and customer? Friends? Frienemies?
"Were you mad the other day?" Hijikata blurted.
"What other day?" the other tilted his head.
"The other day! The day before yesterday."
"Ah, Hiji-billy day."
"It's not Hiji-billy day! It was Wednesday."
Gintoki laughed.
"Why were you mad the other day?"
"Was I mad the other day?"
The dark haired was ready to explode. "Yes, you were! You were mad because I asked that question and somehow, something got fucked up."
"Ooo. Now who's mad?" the other sing-songed. Goddammit. Did he really have to deal with this? Why couldn't Gintoki just answer the question properly like a normal person would do?!
"I'm not mad."
"Uh-huh. You're holding up the line. Sooo… unless you wanna leave your phone number or something so we can talk this out at another time…." Gintoki spread his hands and shrugged.
"Why would I do that? If you don't want to talk about it, then don't."
There was a pause then Gintoki sighed. "This is why I was mad. Now shoo. You're holding up the line."
Toushirou stepped aside and frowned. The white haired was mad because he was holding up the line? That doesn't even make sense.
Gintoki didn't hand him his drink today.
The next day, the white haired smiled and mispronounced his name as always.
"Here's your order, Hijack-kun. Thank you for your patronage."
"Right, Kintoki."
He totally didn't expect the "OI! Tama! Did you hear that?! Kintoki? Do you think he met Sakamoto?!"
Hijikata didn't know who the fuck Sakamoto was but if he was getting Gintoki's name wrong too, that made him a friend of Hijikata's.
On his cup was, once again, a scratchy, messy 'Hijack-kun'.
Hijikata took that back. Sakamoto was not a friend of Hijikata.
"AH HAHAHAHAHAHA! Kintoki! You're hilarious as always!" The sound came from the tall, sunglasses wearing, permy-headed man sitting on the counter in front Gintoki.
Ugh, another perm head.
"It's Gintoki. And get off the counter! You're disturbing the customers." Gintoki pushed the large man off. He looked at Hijikata and waved.
Hijikata grimaced.
"This is Sakamoto. I mentioned him to you last time."
"You didn't mention him to me. You mentioned him to Tama." Hijikata wasn't sure what to make of him remembering this tidbit of information.
He remembered Tama because she was always behind Gintoki fixing the drinks (even though they've never spoke to each other except that one time). Plus, Sakamoto was mentioned yesterday. It was only natural that he would remember it, right? He can't remember what he had for dinner but he remembered the name Sakamoto. That wasn't so weird. Right?
"Yeah, but you still heard it so it counts as mentioning it to you."
"Who says?" Hijikata challenged.
"I do. Anyway, Sakamoto, meet King Grumpy, Jarkarta Tootsie-Roll."
"OI! Where's Jarkarta coming from?" He'd be smacking the other man on the head if the counter wasn't between them. "And I don't want to meet your friends. I'm not your friend."
"Yeah well, I didn't choose to be this guy's friend either." The white haired jerked a thumb to Sakamoto.
Instead, Hijikata turned to Gintoki's friend. "It's Hijikata Toushirou. And I'm not grumpy."
"AH HAHAHAHA!" Hijikata winced. "Nice to meet you, grumpy Tissue-Roll-kun. I'm Sakamoto Tatsuma."
It felt like his arm was going to be ripped off with the handshake.
"It's Toushirou." Was Toushirou a hard name to remember? Was it really that hard? Hijikata Toushirou? He was sure there were numerous other people named Toushirou and they all had nice baristas who said their names right.
"Alright, Wet-Tissue-kun. See ya, Kintoki. I have a flight to catch. Well, pilot. AH HAHAHAHA!"
And with a wave, the loudmouth was gone.
The dark haired scoffed. "How the fuck did he get Wet-Tissue from Toushirou?"
"You don't need to introduce me to your friends," Hijikata muttered as he took out his money.
"Well, good morning to you too, grumpy pants."
"I'm not your friend."
"Right. Of course we're not friends." Gintoki's eyes flickered to him. Then he did a ridiculous eyebrow wiggle that definitely suggested something more. "Because I never remember your name anyway, Hijinks-tara."
"Who's Hijinks-tara, huh?!"
…
"Here's your order, Tara-san."
"Who the fuck is Tara, you bastard?!"
"Whoops, sorry. I meant Tanya."
"If my name is Tanya, th-then you're – you're Ginko. Like the Gingko nuts. Because that's wh-what you are. Nuts!"
Hijikata stormed out as Gintoki laughed at his back.
Heyy. Thanks for all the reviews! I'm so glad that people like this AU since I wasn't even sure half of what I wrote made sense. More characters will probably be appearing in the later chapters. I seriously wasn't expecting this to be a multi-chapter story, more of a one-shot.
Anyway, enjoy dense Hijikata and hot barista Gintoki. Thanks for reading and feedback is always appreciated!
