Disclaimer: Twilight isn't mine, but Cutey, the little cute teddy bear, is mine! :D Enjoy~
Chapter 1- Memories
"Amor est vitae essentia" was the last piece of advice on the letter my mother, Renee, gave me before disappearing from my life. Forever. When I was 7, she walked out the door, leaving me and Charlie to pick up the pieces. That vivid image is forever ingrained in my memory...
Flashback:
I heard my parents arguing yet again in the living room downstairs. Sighing, I played with my beloved soft toy and confidante, Cutey which was a present from my mum. I wondered why this was happening to me. Tears carved tracks across my face, and I fell asleep with my tears and Cutey as my only company.
After around an hour, I was rudely shaken awake by my dad, Charlie.
"Say goodbye to her. She's leaving." It scared me. His tone of voice was pleading and his eyes were emotionless.
I flung the door, still holding Cutey, and ran down the stairs.
"Mum! Where are you going? Can I go with you?"
"No, honey. I'm sorry. I do not love your dad anymore. I'm leaving and I have to go..."
"NO! Mum!" She gave me a kiss and put a letter into my hand.
"I'm so sorry, Bella, read the letter when you are old enough..."
Renee opened the house door and took her luggage out. A car was in the driveway.
I followed her, sobbing. "Mum, no, you can't leave. What about dad and me?"
Yet, young as I was, I understood the situation, no words and nothing would deter her from leaving.
"I'm sorry, Bella. Goodbye." She slid into the car and it drove off.
I collapsed on the driveway, watching the car disappear. Charlie carried me in and put me on the bed. I did not remember much; I only felt numb and could not stop crying. Nothing mattered to me anymore.
When I was 12, I opened the letter and saw my mum's familiar penmanship. It read:
Dear Bella,
I'm truly sorry for leaving you. But there was no other choice. Charlie and I quarrelled many times everyday and I did not love him anymore.
However, I hope and know that you are strong enough to continue living without me. I only wish you can forgive me one day.
amor est vitae essentia,
Love,
Mum
End flashback
Everything is an illusion. Lies were a painful cause of my past. My mother lied, she did not love me. How could she love me? Renee abandoned me and left me with my own pain. I suppressed my own tears that were trying to make an escape.
Everything in my life was wrong. Life is a rollercoaster; it has its own ups and downs. But so far, my life has been nothing, only filled with darkness and anguish.
Throughout my primary school life, I had only one best friend, Alice Mary Cullen. She was curious and tried to probe into my past. The quarrel started when she could not take it anymore. Alice asked me about my mum and why I was always alone. The topic was sensitive and I just lashed out at her. I dumped all my frustrations and accusations on her. I accused her of being nosy and if she couldn't bear me, she should stop being my best friend. I did not mean it seriously; I was angry at everything and everyone.
A few months later, Alice's family moved away. I felt guilty at what had happened. But she did not even apologise or leave me her contact number and address.
Renee, my mother, abandoned me and broke me. Alice, my best friend, did not try to understand me and did not stick by me.
I'm Isabella Marie Swan but I like to be called Bella. That was only a small fragment of my painful past. I'm average-looking, around 5'4 and have long brown hair and boring brown eyes. Enough of me, I can't help looking like a Plain Jane.
That was my painful past and the scars will forever remain. They betrayed my trust and abandoned me.
When I was 12, Charlie couldn't bear the memories and decided to move to Forks, Washington at the end of the school year. Needless to say, I was relieved.
I would be starting high school in Forks High. A chance to escape the painful memories. A chance to start anew. Little did I know that my past will return to haunt me when the time comes...
A/N: hey :D phew! first chapter finished! thanks to the two reviewers who reviewed my prologue!(: oh, i've something to say: in case you do not understand this phrase "amor est vitae essentia", it means that "love is the essence of life". yup, hope you will continue reading and review! I'm kind of nervous. it's my first try, after all! ;D and please pardon any grammar or spelling mistakes! by the way, before I forget to mention, this chapter is an insight into Bella's past and the reason she and Charlie are moving to Forks!
PLEASE REVIEW! :D
- edwardandbellaforever25
