"—for once!" Lily yells, her voice pitched so high that a few first- or second-year Gryffindors seated in the Common Room chairs turn and give her frightened looks. The rest do the their best to ignore her, but Dorcas Meadowes pointedly collects her schoolwork and leaves. "James Potter, for once in your life why can't you just—"

In the background, Lily can hear Emmeline Vance talking in what is meant to be a soothing voice, but Lily isn't just angry now, she's nearly hysterical. And she can't even remember why she's angry—she just knows that there are trapped screams in her throat and if only there were some way to wipe that look off James Potter's face—what right has he to be looking so hurt? Everything's always centred around him and she, Lily Evans, is sick to the bone of it—

"Why on earth can't you just—!" Lily chokes on her own words. She cannot, will not break down. She is Head Girl and she cannot, will not break down.

James Potter's eyes are hazel and angry and hurt.

"Why—" Lily begins for the first time, feeling a scream rise in her throat. She can't even remember why she's yelling at James Potter except that he's been doing something ridiculously unsuited to his position as Head Boy, again.

"Why can't I just what, Evans?" says Potter, his voice as ominous as his eyes. "You know we didn't mean to hurt—"

Lily can't face him, so she does something she's pretty sure she hasn't done since third grade; she turns on her heel and runs away. Up to Emmeline's dorm room, the room she used to share with three other girls, where she throws herself on the nearest bed and buries her face in the blankets. She hears the muffled slam of her friends entering, and then all is quiet.

Emmeline, Mary and Marlene are silent, and Lily does nothing to break the silence. But they all know that it must end sometime soon, and Lily wants to cry. She could have burst into tears just moments ago, but she simply can't squeeze them out now, when she most needs to.

Lily looks up from her pillow. "Marlene. What should I do?" She's so empty, so horribly empty…

Marlene concentrates, a frown swimming across her face. "You should tell him what you want him to do."

Lily buries her face again and mumbles, "I can't."

"Look, Lily. I don't know what you really feel, and for someone who always knows everything—" Lily can feel Mary stopping, hoping for a smile from Lily at her joke. "For someone who always knows what her best friend is feeling, that's saying a lot. But you know what you feel. I can tell you do."

Lily takes one look at her three friends and the tears come.


Her face is still tear-streaked, and James feels like a monster, standing there at the door of his room in the Heads' dorm, gazing down at Lily Evans' tear-stained face. But he hardens himself, though he knows that he caused her tears.

"What?" he says in a voice that he can hear crack a little. He hasn't done anything wrong. It's all been her fault this time. Lily Evans, always yelling at him for things she wouldn't even subtract points from other people for. Lily Evans, always high-strung when it comes to him. Lily Evans, the girl he's liked since he was in second year.

She moves her lips as if about to speak, but doesn't—she can't speak. He manages to think ironically, Lily Evans off her pedestal.

He sighs and relents, stepping out into the Heads' Common Room. Her hair is pulled into a last-minute dark red ponytail down her back.

She sits on a chair, silent, flushing uncomfortably until James breaks the silence. "Come to finish your sentence?"

Her face turns the color of her hair, but she doesn't argue.

"So finish it," says James, but his heart trembles. He knows that she was wrong to blatantly insult him as she just did. He knows that he was in the right, at least this once, and everything she said was undeserved.

And he knows that he, James Potter, is in love with Lily Evans.

She takes a deep breath. "I'm sorry."

"What?"

"I'm sorry, Potter. I'm sorry I yelled at you for no plausible reason and I'm sorry I treated you like dirt."

James stands there with his mouth hanging open like some halfwit. With a tremendous effort, he snaps it shut. "You're sorry?" And he, James Potter, regrets it the minute it's out of his mouth.

She looks away. "Yeah."

James runs a hand through his dark hair. "Okay."

"Okay?"

"Yeah."

Lily looks at him like he has gone mad. "Why can't you just—" She stops herself, realising that going on will mean going in a circle.

"Why can't I just what, Evans?" he says quietly. Pauses. "Look, Evans. I've fancied you since forever, okay? And you've always said no. Maybe that egged me on at first; maybe in third year I was just curious how long it would take for you to actually agree. Maybe in fourth year I'd gotten into the habit and couldn't stop because I, James Potter, never give up on anything. Maybe in fifth year—"

Breathe in.

"—maybe in fifth year I actually started liking you. Maybe in sixth year I meant every word I'd ever said to you about asking you out. And maybe now—"

She is staring at him intently, her green eyes focused and brighter and greener than emeralds or grass—a green the color of every galaxy the universe has ever known. Lily's very own green.

"Maybe now I'm in love with you, Lily. And all you've ever said is no. All you're ever going to say is no. And you're just going to keep believing that I'm the person I was in third year, in fourth year. But I'm not, because I'm me. And I am in love with you."

Lily doesn't speak, but she doesn't need to. The silence is comfortable, for once, not bitter like it had been in the past. And James doesn't resist when Lily rises from her seat and puts both her arms around him; he hugs her back, because that moment is theirs, if it is their only moment together.

And then she opens the door to leave, and James is going to let her leave, because he may have pursued her relentlessly for six and a half years but now he is going to let her go without a sound, without a murmur of protest—

"Evans!" He feels the familiar words bubbling to his lips. "Will you go out with me?"

Lily turns, looking at him with her eyes full of stars. "Maybe."

And James Potter smiles. Because Lily, even though she hasn't actually said it, has said yes.