I tested my luck by walking among them again.
The gunshot from earlier made the majority of the walkers migrate but a few still lingered in the store that Lee and Kenny wanted to do a supply run through, the amount of walkers inside meant they would have had to go somewhere else.
Now that they have a dirty smelly young woman to blend in: they don't have to go somewhere else.
This is some kind of camping store. It was locally owned so it wasn't stocked to the brim to begin with, the looting lowered the amount of supplies we could gather but there is still enough for us to gain from.
First I took a backpack from the shelves to gather the supplies in. The main pocket zipper echoed as I opened it, momentarily forgetting that zippers make noise.
Idiot.
I turned around, face to face with a decaying woman. Her decaying gums and low gurgles almost caused me to gag. She looked around for a moment then brushed past me.
I could see Lee poking out of the back room, his gun raised and aiming at the walker. I held my hand up to him. Everything is okay.
He understood the signal and relaxed, easing inside the door slowly.
I began my task of walking through the aisles, grabbing anything that looked useful- so pretty much everything- while trying my best to keep quiet.
A mallet, tins of grease, fishing wire, nails, and BB pellets were the kinds of supplies that I found. The store didn't have a lot of good tools, the tools that are left are made of hard plastic and painted a bright color, I was lucky if I came across anything made of metal.
I hesitated going down the children's aisle, I don't think I'll find anything useful here. I turned to leave but a walker blocked my path, staring at me carefully as I swung around.
I continued, stopping at the baby food and noticing a certain brand in a little glass container, Brandon's favorite. It was even his favorite flavor, carrots and peas, Lisa and I never knew why he liked it, tasted awful.
Maybe his mother gave it to him? Would he even know enough about the world to like something out of nostalgia? We never even knew how old he was in the first place, so perhaps not. We know he wasn't new born, he could lift his head and he started to walk after awhile.
We considered going back to the car we found him in and looking around for any information, maybe his mom carried something in her purse or had some pictures we could give him when he got older. I almost wish we had only so I had something to remember him by.
I took the baby food, tucking the small jar inside of my jacket, a hidden pocket just big enough for this.
I walked back to the door, stuffing a few supplies in the bag on my way, waiting for Lee to open the door for me so I can walk in quietly.
Kenny waited in the alley keeping an eye out for roamers, he took the backpack from me and looked taken aback from the weight of it. "How much did ya' get?"
"A lot." I smiled. "Are we going to look for food now?"
He smiled this time. "We usually stop after one store, but you seem to be our little good luck charm."
I ignored the 'little' comment and followed them to a different store, not locally owned so it's larger, full of more walkers than before.
Kenny handed me the bag and wished me luck.
I felt my heart pounding, wringing my hands on the straps of the bag as I sauntered through, stuffing the food in the bag and attempting to cover it up with cloth to stop the crinkling packaging.
I don't know what's different about this place but I can't focus. I held my breath and becoming hyper aware of the noises I made. Can they hear me breath? Can they hear the zipper lightly tapping against the backpack? Can they hear the saliva moving in my mouth? Can they hear the blood rushing through my ears?
The rotting food attracted a swarm of flies, buzzing loudly and flying around directionless.
I could see the maggots writhing in a nearby corpse.
I have to get out of here.
I can't do this anymore, I HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE.
I could feel soulless eyes on me, every walking body turning their heads and facing me, I'm surrounded. They know.
I turned around and weaved around the walkers as they walked to me, no longer believing that I am one of them, I'm just something for them to catch, something for them to turn.
Lee must have heard whatever noise I made to gain the attention of the walkers, he peaked out and locked eyes with me.
I didn't have to say anything because he saw it, the walkers reaching out to me as I limped away, I feared that my legs could give out at any moment. It would be that easy.
Kenny looked surprised as Lee and I both quickly shut the door behind us. "What happened in there, kid?"
Lee hushed Kenny and looked to the walkers that meandered near by the alley. He took a rock from the ground, throwing it the opposite from us to gather the attention of the walkers.
We got back on the road to the inn and felt safe enough to talk out loud. We didn't talk too much, mostly about the supplies I had gotten and how they usually aren't able to grab this much.
They didn't ask me about what happened in the store.
When we made it to the inn Lilly greeted us with a relieved look, bringing us in to her room to sort the backpack through.
"Is that enough?" I asked, watching as she pulled everything out and sort it on the bed.
"Well..."
I laced my fingers together.
"You took clothes, water, shoes, bandages..." She looked up to me. "A shower, if you're staying that long."
"Savannah is a long way, Sharon." Lee stated. "You've been walking awhile, you should take a day to rest."
"I didn't want to take you with us just for that reason." Kenny crossed his arms.
Lee gave him a look. "Just?"
Kenny muttered something under his breath. I don't get it.
Lilly gestured to all the supplies I gathered. "You've paid us back, by a lot. Really, you have. Stay for the night, you won't make that walk without rest- and food."
"Or I can leave now." I crossed my arms, unintentionally copying Kenny's stance. I can't postpone my meeting with Lisa any longer than I have.
Lee lightly chuckled. "You need to rest, I can't let you walk out of here after seeing you like that."
I gave in to their hospitality, mostly because this is the most calm I've seen Lilly act around me. Both time's I've been around her she pointed a gun at me so this is a nice change, a change I really don't want to get used to.
"Thanks."
Lilly lead me to an unused room, placing a new set of clothes on the bed. She told me they already took everything of use from this room and were about to take the bed and couch until I arrived.
I thanked her again for everything and waved goodnight.
Once the door clicked shut I broke in to tears, the weight of everything finally weighing me down. I could still feel the stare of those walkers, the presence as I walked among them, how alone I felt without Lisa by my side.
To top it all off: they are being so nice. I can't say no to them but I can't stay here, but what if this is the last group of people I meet? What if I run into groups that aren't so nice? Should I really just abandon Lisa and stay here, solely because it's comfortable comparable to being alone?
Before I washed myself I washed my pajama pants in the sink, scrubbing away as much dirt as I could and hanging it up to dry, as much as I loved it I threw away the top, it's tattered and useless now.
Stumbling in to the bathroom I turned the water on in the tub, no hot water. I had to ease in to the cold, feeling my muscles clench and shake from the cold.
I shivered, roughly scrubbing the burnt hair clumps from my scalp, tugging on the matted hair and soaking the soap into it. It took me too long to realize that my bandages are still on, soaking wet and ruined. The bandages slid off and revealed dirty wounds stitched together and burns that had ointment on it.
I caught a glimpse of myself naked in the mirror before I could grab my towel, shocked thinking that there was someone else in the bathroom with me. That can't be me. I broke down in to sobs again.
I'm so skinny. I could count every rib, I could see my bones through my skin, my hips never looked so small, my waist never curved inward so sharply, my cheeks caved in.
How long has it been since I've eaten, since I've had a proper meal? How long was I walking for? Did I loose my mind? Am I going mad?
I felt my new body, squishing my thighs that no longer touched, stomach that didn't bulge, breasts that no longer fit my bra, chin that doesn't double when I look down, arms that don't jiggle when I move.
I felt a wave of exhaustion flow over me after I put on my clothes, crawling under the blankets to my bed. I didn't bother clipping my nails or cleaning my ears, I didn't even put new bandages on.
I'm too tired. Everything felt heavy.
This bed is so comfy.
So warm.
Warm.
Cozy.
Safe.
"Hey Lizzy?" I mumbled, having to clear my throat. My stomach rumbled and ached. "Liz?"
I tried to open my eyes but everything felt swollen, even my tongue felt big and hard to move. What time is it?
"Elizabeth?"
I opened my eyes only slightly, not recognizing the bland sheets I'm in. All my limbs felt too sore to move, but I did it anyways.
Everything spun as I sat up, my vision blurred when I put my feet on the ground. Quickly I lost which way was up and felt everything move, my head suddenly becoming heavy as I put pressure on my feet, my feet! Why do they hurt so bad?
The migraine I had could kill an army. I almost couldn't see when I opened my eyes again, only seeing the floor.
I curled in a ball and felt my feet, not recognizing the callouses and various cuts that littered my legs. I crawled to where I think the bathroom is and found the toilet, painfully throwing up. Everything felt bad.
"Sharon? Are you okay?"
I closed my eyes and leaned my head against the wall. "I'm fine mom." I muttered, hearing footsteps near me. "I just don't feel too well."
"Do you need help back to your bed?" She asked, her accent strange and unfamiliar.
I nodded, soon feeling dad pick me up and lay me down on the bed, feeling sleep wash over me when the blankets were back.
Katjaa closed the door to Sharon's room quietly, joining Kenny and Lee on the balcony in worry.
"Was she alright?" Lee asked, admiring the motel in the moonlight. "I heard her talking, when I knocked she didn't answer so I feared the worst."
"She looked exhausted, must've fallen outta bed." Kenny said.
Katjaa looked away. "I don't think she knew where she was." Kenny and Lee furrowed their brows. "Poor thing, she called me mom."
"She thought you..." Lee muttered. "Jesus..."
"You don't think she-"
"I'm sure she's fine." Kat interrupted. "She's tired. Who knows how long she's been walking, how much blood she's lost, the pain from those burns."
Kat thought back to when she first treated Sharon, she had to pull so much glass from her feet. It was a wonder how Sharon could still stand.
"I don't think she should leave." Kenny stated. "Her Lisa friend may not be alive, and I don't think she'd make that walk by herself."
"We can't keep her locked up, Ken." Kat objected. "How can we stop her from leaving?"
"We'll have to convince her." Lee said. "Lilly said she looked deathly skinny, I don't think she should go until she has something to eat."
"Can't say no to that." Kenny sighed.
Kat didn't want Sharon to leave, not caring about the supplies she brought for the group, caring about Sharon herself. This young girl shouldn't have to face the world out there, she should be safe and taken care of like she can be here.
