This is what I had planned for this story but I can't make it do what I want:
balinor was caught after he fled ealdor leaving hunith pregnant and widowed. Merlin was born a dragonlord and kilgarrah told him so when he met the dragon for the first time. Merlin will not be releasing a vengeful half mad dragon on Camelot. also he's a lot more powerful at this point in time than the show led us to believe and he knows how the druids almost revere him. Merlin and Morgana fall in love. go to the druid camp find Mordred. happy little family. Merlin goes back and forth from their home to Camelot to work for Arthur. until Uther finds out and tries to have everyone killed.
for the first time in her relatively short life Morgana was terrified. she had just done magic! magic! in Camelot! she needed to get out. go somewhere. anywhere but here. Uther would burn her without a second thought. she had to go now. where? Gaius. Gaius was here before the purge. he knew about her nightmares that weren't nightmares. but Gaius was here before the purge. he was Uther's man through and through. Arthur? would her foster-brother turn her in to his father? did she want to risk it? Gwen maybe. no. not sweet Gwen. if Morgana was caught, Gwen would be burned as an accomplice. who? who would help her without turning her in? who wasn't scared of magic? who wasn't afraid of Uther or Arthur? ..Merlin! of course! Merlin was from cenred's kingdom and cenred allowed magic! Merlin even had that friend.. Walter? no Will! that's it. he had that sorcerer friend Will. why hadn't she thought of Merlin first? never mind. it didn't matter. what mattered was going to Merlin. he would know what to do . he always seemed to know more than he let on anyway.
she rushed through the castle in her nightdress and burst through the door to gauis' chambers as Merlin was coming down from his tiny room.
"can i help you my lady?"
"Merlin Merlin I'm scared. you know whats wrong with me don't you?"
"i"
"Merlin please! i need someone else to say it. i feel as though im losing my mind. please"
"you have magic Morgana. you're a seer and you have magic."
her knees felt weak and she would have collapsed if not for Merlin's hands on her arms. "Merlin i need to leave Camelot. now. please." it was a testament to her fear that she was begging. she was as close to royal as one could get without being royal and here she was begging for help from a servant.
Merlin sat her down on a bench and held her close. running a soothing hand up and down her back while the other held her hand. "Morgana, i have something to tell you." he took his hands from her and brought his cupped palms to his mouth. he whispered into them and when he opened them a butterfly flew out.
her jaw dropped (quite unbecoming of a lady to be gobsmacked but here she was) and then she grinned. it rivaled Merlin's grin in the way it lit up the room. wait the room was actually brighter! the candles were burning higher! was she doing that? oh gods! would she ever learn to control this?
"come my lady, there's someone I want you to meet. he'll be able to tell you more than i can. but let's go back to your room so you're not in your night-clothes."
she looked down at herself a bit embarrassed to be in the company of a man while she was in such a state of undress.
"hold on though, I'll get you a cloak so you have a bit of modesty going back."
he went to his room and came back with a well-worn cloak and a vial of some draught or another. she raised her eyebrow in question and he explained that if they were to meet with anyone in the corridors, she should say that there were no servants about and she desperately needed a tincture of angelica, lavender and lovage.
"what is that for?"
"oh," he blushed. "it's my recipe for, um, womanly issues. if the, um, issues are really bad i add rosemary and lemon balm. tastes better than anything Gaius can come up with. i figured if women have to go through all that then they shouldn't suffer through horrible medicine too."
"how thoughtful. and what should i say about your presence?"
"oh, um, it wouldn't be proper for me to leave you unescorted even though everyone knows that if there was an attack you could take care of yourself. after all I'm simple-minded and doing foolish things like that are expected of me."
she laughed, "let's go Merlin. who are you taking me to meet? will you be taking me out of Camelot? how should i dress?" she yawned "on second thought, can we meet with him tomorrow? I'm feeling a bit tired. do you have anything cooked up for a dreamless sleep?"
"actually, i do. I'm hoping Gaius will let me start distributing it to people. again it doesn't taste horrible and the effects are lovely." he continued talking as he walked into his room. "it's not difficult to make and the person doesn't wake groggy and disoriented. just refreshed and content. here. Gaius mostly uses henbane but I've discovered that Valerian, lavender and jasmine work better. it's just so hard to get jasmine on my salary. if i can start selling it in the market I'll be able to trade for it."
