Hi! I hope you enjoyed the first chapter! Two quick things…I'm an Aussie so there may be some words that we use that some of you may not eg: mobile phone for cell phone! Secondly, I made up a name for Brian's partner in this chapter, Jake! I'd love your feedback, thanks.

Olivia was sitting on the couch in her and Brian's apartment, watching her face plastered across the news. For some reason her trauma continued to create a media frenzy. She remembered lying in the hospital bed after those four days of terror had finally ended. Her face was covered in bruises, her hand bandaged but that didn't stop her seeing the image of Nick escorting her out of the beach house on the TV, of the patient next to her. She felt physically sick remembering the looks of pity directed at her as she stumbled out of the beach house; victim. They had all labelled her a victim. No one knew what her four days of horror entailed but they could see just by looking at her that he had harmed her in some way or another. She knew she would never be the same again but what was worse was the fact that her colleagues, her boyfriend looked at her so differently. She hated that feeling more than anything else so she ensured the daily struggle of suppressing the memories and trying to go back to the old Olivia, the untouched, non-victim Olivia. That had been working until she discovered she would soon have to face Lewis and recount her ordeal. Now that a trial date had been set, she worried she would struggle more than ever before.

"Babe, are you ok?" Brian asked. She hadn't heard him come in. She looked at him, vacantly.

"Let's turn this off" Brian said, picking up the remote and switching the TV off. "Have you eaten?" She nodded. He didn't know whether that was a lie so decided he would heat up dinner for the two of them anyway.

"How was your day" she finally asked.

"Nothing special". She didn't say anything.

"I dropped by the precinct to see you today and spoke to Fin, he mentioned that Lewis's trial is in 7 days", he waited for a reaction, nothing. "How are you feeling about it?"

"When did you stop by, I didn't see you?" she queried. 'Really' he thought, is she going to do this again.

"I wanted to take you out for a late lunch, Cragen said you and Amaro were in Brooklyn. So how are you feeling about the trial Liv?"

"Lunch would have been nice" was all she could answer. She got up when she heard the microwave beep and went to head to their bedroom.

"Liv, are we really going to do this?"

"Do what?" she asked, pretending she had no idea what he was talking about.

"Pretend like everything is ok? Tip toe around one another, making small talk? I know this is hard for you and I can't even pretend to understand what you're going through but Liv, you need to talk to someone about".

"There's nothing to talk about Brian, it is what it is".

"That's not good enough" he said, firmly.

"Excuse me?" Olivia was taken aback and could feel her anger brewing.

"It's been 2 months. For two months I haven't pushed you. I haven't pressured you to tell me what happened during those four days, even though it's been driving me completely crazy not knowing. I have given you the time you need but we can't pretend like it didn't happen Olivia".

"This….thing…didn't happen to you Brian, it happened to me" she yelled angrily.

"I know and I want to be there for you but how can I when all you do is completely shut me out?"

"This has nothing to do with you".

"How can you say that? I'm supposed to be your boyfriend Olivia, we're supposed to talk to each other, to be there for one another but how the hell am I meant to do that when you won't let me in?"

"I'm dealing with it ok, so just drop it". She could feel tears making there way to the surface and she desperately tried to suppress them. She had been putting on such a brave act around Brian that she couldn't fail now.

"If that were true then you would stop wearing this stupid mask you've made for yourself and talk to me. I know you're not fine, I know you are hurting, I know you are frightened, hell everyone knows it Liv except you".

She looked up at him meekly, 'was that true' she wondered.

He saw the hurt in her eyes.

"Talk to me" he pleaded.

She didn't respond for a few seconds. "I can't" she whispered, turning away.

"It's ok babe, please" he begged. "You're safe here; I want you to tell me what happened".

Her large, brown eyes made contact with his and he could see tears welling in them. She had been trying to avoid this moment for 10 weeks; she didn't even know what she should tell him now. Of course she had played her story over and over in her head, knew exactly what she would tell him but here, now, with him in front of her pleading for her to let him in, she wondered if she could tell him everything. Then she thought about what that would mean and involuntarily wrapped her arms around her body, the filth and shame overcoming her.

"Let's sit on the couch". He lightly took her hand and pulled her towards the couch, her feet seemed unwilling to move on there own. He couldn't believe there was a chance he was finally getting through to her. He knew bits and pieces about what Olivia had to endure whilst being held against her will however, he was seriously going insane as all kinds of images taunted him regularly. She had survived that's really all he knew. He guided her to the couch and held her hands in his. "Take your time".

"What do you want to know?" She was stalling.

"You said you came home to your apartment and William Lewis was waiting for you. He pointed a gun and your head and said"…she interrupted him.

"Welcome home Detective Benson". She could see the gun pointed at her head, the sadistic demon smirking as he knew he had her. "I froze" she said, he could hear the shame in her voice.

"He had a gun to your head Liv, anyone including me would have done the same thing". He wasn't sure if she had heard him.

"I tried to talk to him, to reason with him, that he didn't have to do this but he just laughed. He started coming towards me so I was backing away towards the door but I knew with his gun pointed at me that it was pointless and he knew it too. He kept taunting me."

"What did he say?"

"He said he had waited so long to get me alone and" she paused "that he had fantasised about this moment when he was alone at night, in bed….". Brian swallowed hard, afraid to react in case it made her hesitate or stop opening up to him. He nodded for her continue.

"I was pinned against the front door and he put his hands on me"….

"Where" Brian interrupted but quickly regretted it. He just needed to know everything.

"He grabbed the bottom of my top and yanked it loose from my pants. Then he put his hand up my top and my under my bra and" she didn't finish, she was sure Brian knew what she meant. He did.

"I can't remember what happened next. I was knocked unconscious somehow and I'm not sure how long I was out". Brian shuddered, his mind couldn't help wondering what happened to her whilst she was unconscious.

"When I came to, my hands and feet were tied to my kitchen chair and I was gagged. He was standing over me smirking. He had my gun. He, he….put the gun between my legs and I tried to push him away and I fell over in the chair. He laughed. Then he took the gag off my mouth and I spat in his face. I tried to reason with him again, telling him that he should get out now and that I wouldn't say anything. I told him that being a member of the NYPD, if he went any further, hell would rain down on him. He didn't care, I remember him raising his arm so high and the barrel of the gun coming towards my head". Brian could see she was getting agitated.

"It's ok Liv, you're doing great".

"I don't think I was out for long but when I came to again he was drinking and smoking a cigarette. When he noticed I was conscious, he took the cigarette and held it against my skin", Brian could see tears brimming to the surface again. "It hurt" she said, so softly he only just heard it. Brian hadn't seen her naked since she was kidnapped so he had no idea where the cigarette burn was but he knew it would have left a scar. They both used to sleep naked but now she slept in sweats even during these warmer nights. He was afraid to sleep naked anymore as he didn't want to scare her or have it seem like he was pressuring her into doing something when she wasn't ready so he settled for boxers and sometimes a singlet too. He longed to be close to her again, to hold her in his arms and to touch her. He thought they may have been getting close to being physically intimate but when Olivia was told about Lewis's upcoming trial, she had completely withdrawn from him again.

"What happened next?" he asked.

"He told me we were going for a ride and he pulled me off the floor and dragged me to the fire escape. I clawed at anything in my apartment to stop him from taking me. I tried to fight him but I couldn't stop him."

Just then there was a knock at the door and Olivia jumped slightly, startled by the noise.

"Fuck not now" Brian swore. It had taken so much effort and coaxing to get her to talk that he knew she would jump at any distraction that came her way. He was right. She got up and looked through the peephole of there apartment door. She saw it was Brian's partner and quickly wiped her eyes before opening the door.

"Hi Jake" Olivia warmly greeted Brian's partner "come on in".

Brian shot Jake a death glare, even though he knew it wasn't his fault.

"I'll leave you guys to it" Olivia said starting to walk out of the room. Brian grabbed her arm "we'll continue this later ok?" he asked. She looked away, thankful for Jake's intrusion. She wanted to erase the thoughts, not try and re-hash them but she knew she would have to do it at trial anyway. "Liv?" he wanted her to commit to a later conversation.

"No" she said adamantly, walking into their bedroom and shutting the door. Her stubbornness was usually alluring but at this moment

"Did I interrupt something" Jake asked hesitantly.

"She was finally opening up to me…about Lewis".

"Sorry man".

"Na, you weren't to know. It shouldn't be like this anyway. She can talk to that shrink all the time but she can't even talk to her own boyfriend?"

"She doesn't have any kind of relationship with her shrink though Cassidy. She didn't know this shrink before what happened and after awhile she won't see him anymore. She's more on guard around the people closest to her". Brian knew his partner made sense but he was frustrated.

Olivia sat on their bed, her knees curled up under her chin. She held her pillow to her face and silently cried into the pillow.

I hope you guys enjoyed! I forgot to say in the first chapter to please review! So I'll say it now – please review! I definitely have an idea where I want this story to go but it's starting off slower than I anticipated! Elliott will definitely be making appearances but as you can see this fic has a lot of Bensidy because I love them! I'm definitely open to your story ideas so please send them my way, thanks!