Hey guys! I apologize for taking so long to update my stories, I'm just nor really sure what to write next. I will try my best to update them all as soon as I can! is being weird at the moment so I apologize if the formatting is different or if there is a gap instead of a line break. There maybe may be quotes from the book so yeah, I obviously don't own anything! Don't sue me! XD Now none of you probably even read these author notes anyways so I'm just gonna skip to please review and let me know what you think!
Warning: There may be slight cussing
Alec sat fidgeting, as his brother and sister looked at him. The expression on their faces clearly expressed they thought he was an idiot. Suddenly Isabelle sighed. "Alec, you need to talk to Magnus and explain why you where going to Camille and talk to him about it." Alec opened his mouth quickly to protest but his brother cut him off. "Seriously bro, you really need to talk to him about it. If nothing else you can have closure."
Alec shook his head frantically. "No, I cant." Isabelle opened her mouth to try to convince him to talk to Magnus again but Alec kept rambling. "I cant Isabelle. It won't do anything. He won't forgive me. I don't deserve to be forgiven. I tried to shorten his life. I cant talk to him." Isabelle looked at him sadly. "Ok Alec. I won't try to make you talk to him but you can't be sure he won't forgive you." She got up, squeezed his hand and walked out of the infirmary, stilettos clicking on the white tiles.
Jace looked at him and gave him a comforting smile he rarely ever showed. "I'm always here if you need to talk bro." He stood up, slapped him on the back, and walked out of the infirmary door. Alec sat staring at the bed and rubbed at his aching chest with his hand. He sighed. He was exhausted. Alec pushed the covers back and stood up slowly on shaking legs. His stomach felt fluttery and Alec held onto the desk. He took a deep breath, let go of the desk, and slowly made his way out of the infirmary to his room. He had never been so glad that his room was on the first floor.
When he got to his room he collapsed on his bed and buried himself under the blue covers. He pulled his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around his chest, finally allowing his tears to fall.
Alec awoke to an intense pain in his abdomen. He groaned and hurriedly threw back the covers and sprinted to his bathroom. He barely crouched over the toilet before he threw up. His throat burned as he vomited the contents of his stomach into the toilet. His stomach ached almost unbearably. After about a minute of this, the pain subsided, leaving Alec gasping for air.
When it looked like he wasn't going to keep throwing up he leaned back against the the wall and wiped the sweat from his brow with a shaking hand. He waited until his breathing slowed and pushed himself up from the floor. He flushed the toilet and leaned against the sink for support. Alec turned on the faucet and rinsed his mouth out with a handful of cold water, wrinkling his nose at the acrid taste in his mouth.
He looked in the mirror and winced at his reflection. He was as white as a sheet, his black hair that was plastered against his forehead with sweat a startling contrast against his pale skin. His eyes where a dull blue and had dark circles under them. He looked like a walking corpse. Alec splashed the cold water against his face, hoping it would bring some life back into him.
He made his way back into his room and just as he collapsed on his bed with relief, someone knocked on his door. Alec groaned. Jaces voice drifted through the door. "Alec, open up. I brought you some soup. You need to eat something. You haven't come out of there in thirteen hours and Isabelle is considering coming up here and force feeding you her mystery stew."
Alec looked at the clock on his desk and his eyes widened in surprise. It had been thirteen hours. How had he been sleeping so long, especially after he had just woke up? Alec got up from his bed reluctantly and opened his door. Even though he was far from hungry, he really did not want to have to eat Isabelle's stew.
Jace was standing in front of him holding a steaming bowl and his eyes grew with concern when he saw Alec. "You look awful." He stated. "Gee, thanks." Alec muttered sarcastically as he took the offered bowl from his brother's hands. "Seriously though, you can't just let yourself waste away, Alec. You need to get over him and move on."
Alec glared at him. "Move on? Move on!? How the hell am I supposed to move on? The love of my life doesn't want anything to do with me anymore, Jace! What would you do if it was Clary, huh? I seem to remember when you two thought you where siblings and you where practically suicidal, going on hunts alone and trying to get yourself killed! And Clary didn't even hate you! So don't you dare stand there and tell me that I need to move on!" Alec spat out and slammed his door in Jace's face.
He stomped over to his bed, sat the bowl on his table and flopped down on the bed angrily. How could they expect him to move on? They love of his life didn't want to ever see him again. He was probably already over him and sleeping with some other black haired blue eyed boy! Though the last words they spoke to each other still rang in his ears and he knew it wasn't true.
"Aku cinta kamu." "What does that mean?" It means I love you. Not that that changes anything."
But how could it not change anything? Wasn't love enough of a reason to at least try? Alec sighed and picked up the bowl of soup, blowing on it to cool it off. It wouldn't do any good to starve himself.
He sipped at his soup slowly as his thoughts filled with all the memories of him and Magnus and the memories that they would never make.
Sorry this chapter is so short guys! But it's better to have a short chapter sooner than a long one a lot later, right? XD I hope you liked it!
