I completely enjoyed the reception I had with this one-shot, so I'm deciding to turn it into a complete story, of course that I still have to think about some details, especially since I want to write a story that is a part so very romantic and the other one extremely tragic (of which I'm still not quite sure); meanwhile I would like to continue reading what you feel and think with your favs, follows and reviews, so I hope you enjoy it :)
Is there something between us?
Without a doubt the notification of Madame Maleficent about the four of us to be sent to Auradon Prep is something that can piss off anyone, also considering the fact that we will be there input through output, everything just to get a stupid magic wand so she can control good and evil at her will. Correction, to the will of our parents.
I catch my breathing while I decide to struggle and have a chat with Jay while we dock the reservation of candy that has the bold limousine that was ordered to enter to the Isle. Only Mal, Evie, Jay and I will be able to step on those lands plagued of good people and situations they could put any villain uncomfortable. Only the four of us, mom will stay here while we do the mission of life or death, or perhaps until Madame Maleficent can destroy the barrier. Whatever it is, I'm free from her for the next few hours, a great relief and a weight that disappears from my small and weak shoulders.
"Look!" Evie screams, attracting everyone's attention.
The barrier, that thing that keeps us imprisoned like rats is there, glowing with that sickly and aberrant yellow color, to which we're approaching more and more. I'm sure I'm not the only one who begins to think that all those stories of people disintegrating when they touch it are real.
"It's a trap!" I answer, causing panic to explode.
Jay decides to become the protector of all of us, as usual as it happens when something dangerous endangers us all four. His arm makes a firm grip around my neck while I guess that he does the same with Mal and Evie; the uncomfortable position is that, uncomfortable, and my expression doesn't help in the least, but I can't deny that I really feel protected from any situation, and if now is the right moment when we disintegrate for trying to leave the Isle of the Lost at least I know that I could confess my feelings for Jay.
But nothing happens, the car keeps moving and everything continues like it was ten seconds ago, intact and with us going to unknown lands.
"What just happened?" Jay releases us and I can breathe in peace while the four of us look back. The Isle, our home, whatever, now we're leaving it behind, all for just a short period of time.
"It must be magic" Evie says, cheerfully.
"Hey" Mal hits a small black remote control against the window to attract the driver's attention, "did this little button just opened up the magic barrier?".
"No" replies the driver, pulling a golden artifact out from who knows where, "this one opens the magic barrier" he goes back to look straight ahead, now that device is one of the things we must get, as a precaution, "that one opens my garage" he places a finger on another button and again he turns his head to speak to her. "And this button…".
The little window goes back up, giving us another bit of privacy. Now it may be a little harder to get that device; I guess the only option is to get that magic wand thing, or from Jay to decide to use those techniques in robbery that he had developed so hard instead of removing the trappings of the fronts of cars.
"Okay" Mal slowly turns her head, pursing her lips with satisfaction, crossing one knee over the other and she completely settles down in the seat, "nasty. I like that guy".
I roll my eyes and keep eating those little bittersweet worms, Mal goes back to get lost in her thoughts and Evie devotes a couple of weird but rarely glamorous gestures to her mirror.
I look out the corner of my eye at Jay, he closes his eyes while he finishes chewing a few pieces of sugar coated strips, the hand of the arm that's over me places on my right shoulder, sending a chill through my entire body.
I've tried so hard not to think about the moment that we had near the watchtower yesterday, but it's like if the memory became more present while I try to ignore it. We haven't had a similar time since then, we had fall back again to be that pair that hits each other for no apparent reason, but the times he's looking to have contact with me (of any kind) are more constant.
"If you keep staring at me like that I'll die, I'm sure of it" I look at him while he widens that sickly smile of satisfaction, I let out a snort and he opens his right eye to look at me. "Also I'm pretty sure that you wouldn't like that".
"Not everything in my head revolves around you, you know?" he turns his head to look at me straight in the eye, he approaches so fast and dangerously that I don't even remember why the hell we're stuck in this stunning car.
"Of course you do" the tip of his nose rubs against mine, and before anything else can happen a daring kiss also gets placed there.
"Oh…" I say and I accompany it with a strange noise in my throat, it was something like a squeal of surprise combined with the fact that Mal and Evie saw that little time, they were devoted themselves to simply look out the window and to the mirror respectively.
"Well, that certainly was the most adorable sound of the universe".
I completely ignore the fact that Evie pulls her hands together so that with her fingers she forms a heart and I try so hard not to die for embarrassment, the heat on my cheeks which also takes control over my ears is so intense and too much that I just simply don't think I can look at any of them to the face for the next twenty thousand years.
"W-was completely n-necessary?" I move into my place, looking for a way to get away from his grip and curl up on the farthest side of the seat. Again my great friends decide to unleash their evilness in me.
"Ugh, come here".
His hand places on my right cheek and he forces my head to get placed on his shoulder, I look up a little to see Mal cocking a smile while she also rolls her eyes, Evie dedicates to us a wide smile and raises a little more that horrible movement she decided to do with her hands.
"Don't listen to them, they're just jealous" he whispers in my ear, his breath sends a strange feeling all over my back while I look down and stop thinking about that I could get something I know none of us can have.
"Actually I don't understand why…".
I leave the sentence unfinished since the loud music starts rumbling in his headphones, I see how he bites his lower lip while he moves his head to the rhythm of the drums and the bass, I try not to think about the thousands of times I used to think about the moments he did that before sleep.
His hand returns to my shoulder, this time he traces small circles on the sleeve of the jacket I'm wearing, I hear the slow beating of his heart while I see that Mal decides to start reading the spell book from Maleficent and Evie settles her lip gloss after each bite that she gives to a couple of candy.
Bring home a puppy, is she serious? Mom has literally wiped out the few dogs in the Isle, including those that she keeps as prisoners in the basement are beginning to decrease in number. I hope that when I return they're no longer there, I dread having to monitor that door every time that she decides to make a garment so that her beasts don't escape. All that she does is cruel and ruthless, but I'm sure she could do all that kind of stuff to other people. To me…
I close my eyes slowly as a chill comes over me, Jay's breathing encompasses and his grip becomes a little weak. I decide that it will not be bad (or so I think) to accompany him on his nap while we get to that place that will be our home for the next couple of hours.
The Isle of the Lost doesn't seem to me a home anymore, nor is Auradon. Where do I belong if there is a place for me?
"Guys, wake up, we are about to get there" Evie shakes my arm to wake me up, and I appreciate that since I didn't think Jay would have liked to know that my head was in his lap.
Jay regains consciousness with such a high jump that he was nearly about to hit his head against the roof of the car, he mumbles a few things and he seems confused about what just happened, or if this really just happened, but the moment he looks at me and winks his right eye is like if my body did forget the correct way to breathe.
I look over his shoulder and in our way I can see lots of people dressed in bright colors, all of them waving at us. From now on I'm starting to feel sick for what's going on outside, or perhaps it's by the lots of candy that I decided to eat. Whatever it is, I don't like it.
"Look at them" Mal growls, rolling her eyes and expressing all the disgust that she's capable of with her voice and gestures. "They are disgusting".
"We're just going to be here for a couple of hours, M, there's no need for the glare" Evie tries to cheer her up, but everyone here knows that will not happen.
"Whatever".
The car goes into a circular way and now the sounds of drums, trumpets and applause is present, like if we were some kind of important person from a kingdom far, far way. Technically we are, but we're not here to attend to a boring ball or something like that, we're here to set free the most amazing people who have walked on the Earth. Or something.
"I want to stay here" I say in a tone of voice that I wanted to keep to myself, but the car stops at that very moment.
I finally look around at all the objects that were traveling with us but to which I didn't pay attention due to my sleep. Not much of this calls my attention, but one thing that resembles likes a blanket that has a pattern that seems vaguely familiar, probably the same one that I should see on some ships approaching to the ports from Auradon occasionally, seems to be asking me to get it out of the car with me. I want it.
"I guess they will not miss any of this, so I'll take this, and this, and oh damn, this has to be mine".
We both reach out at the same time, holding opposite ends of this thing. Jay pulls from it with some force, which I respond by pulling too, he looks me in the eyes and smiles before doing so again, I don't let myself be overcome by the stupid things that are formulated in my head and pull again.
"This will not result in anything good at all" Evie whispers aloud, amused by all this.
I didn't expect the car door to be opened but I have to thank the driver he did that because surely this would have ended with a punch in my arm coming straight from Jay from me to let go of this, but my escape plan can't be completed, one part because I decided to fall down on the ground, and the other one because I'm fighting against him, there's no way out. I do all I have as an option: screaming and hold on to this thing.
"Stop!" I scream and that seems to encourage him to step over my stomach. "You got everything else! Why do you want whatever this is?!".
"Cause you want it!" his jaw gets tense and I can see complete hate in his eyes but I deny letting go of this thing because I really want it, even if I don't know what in the Earth it is.
"No!" I try to move away his damned boot but he steps harder over me, taking my breath away in a horrible way.
"Give it to me!" for a moment our eyes found each other's, and I'm so freaking sure that I want this that I refuse this feelings to come to the surface. "Let go!".
"Guys, guys, guys!" Mal says after she enjoys the show, we both stop with that, of course, since it's not very usual that someone finds her with her guard off. "We've got an audience".
We both turn our heads to the audience, right in the exact moment when a short woman makes her way through a bunch of people with lots of instruments and in uniforms, beside her comes a girl and a guy, and I don't feel like really talking to any of them, they seem that kind of persons that sweat goodness, and that's gross.
"Just… cleaning up" he says, giving them one of his always present and very attractive smiles, spitting I don't know what that he had in his mouth. "Get up" he growls and with a swift move I'm on my feet and trying to pretend that nothing had happened with this new audience of us.
From there everything becomes in lots of greetings and the woman telling him to leave the things like he found them, Jay introducing himself and calling that girl 'foxy' (like if I really cared that he did, and of course I did) and boring speeches about us getting here and all that stuff. So much smiling should be painful, and I like so much the fact that Mal wants to rip Audrey's head off.
I can't deny that I was solemnly scared when that creepy statue transformed into an actual beast, and maybe it was a reflex that I jumped into Jay's arms for protection, thing he didn't liked since he forced me back to the ground and pushed me. He's… different, or something.
When this Doug guy tells us that we'll have to take a class called "Remedial Goodness 101" is like a punch in the evilness to every single one of us. Like if a person talking about many good things tomorrow morning could actually turn us into good people just like that. They'll have to hit us with their best shot, and anyway we'll not be here by tomorrow morning.
The only thing that I take as important is the working hour of the library. I don't know, maybe I could find something good in there.
"Alright guys, this is your dorm" Doug stands in front of a door, he's still not daring to look at any of us at the eye for more than two seconds. I have nothing against him, surely it's Jay who had him that scared. "If you need anything…".
"We know where to turn. Out" he ducks his head and runs down the hallway like a shot at the order of Jay.
I open the dorm's door and I find myself with a spacious place with too much sunlight coming in through the large windows, surrounded by wood, it just literally seems that every single thing of the furniture was intended to employ fifteen trees in each one.
Jay pushes me and without saying a word he jumps on the bed that's closer to a window, he extends his arms over the back and throws his head back, like if that was really enough to mark his territory.
"I want that bed" I growl through clenched teeth while I close the dorm's door behind me.
"You do? Well, that will not happen in the next couple of hours" I roll my eyes and throw to him the first thing I have in my power, a considerably heavy statuette that hits his abdomen, and he doesn't flinch at all.
Reminder: he has muscles.
He raises his head with a so fast and aggressive movement I can swear that he will have some injured vertebrae for a couple of days, but that doesn't erase the stupid grin he should always keep in his face. It's not as broad and so full of goodness like the ones from those people we just met, it's more his trademark, like slaying an enemy or something like that on some people on the Isle.
"If you want the bed you just have to ask for it" he bites his lower lip and talks pursing his lips, he slightly arches his right eyebrow and I refuse to use that awful word Evie said in the car.
"I want that bed" I answer, using a lower tone of voice, lowering my look since I can no longer look that expression without a sigh threatening to come out.
"Come and get it".
I look at him just enough to see how he places the beanie on his face and slides his arms behind his head; he's taunting of me and that maybe yesterday I mentioned a few times how… 'captivating' his arms are.
What is he expecting me to do? That I climb on that mattress and find a way where I can sleep there? That I just take the one on the other side? Sleep on the floor? Give up to the feelings? Seeing it so any one is an option, and I must add that at some point in the night we'll be returning to the Isle.
I don't know which is worse, if the idea of returning to the Isle or the idea of her coming out from there and bringing back her wave of canine murders to fulfil her maniacal desires.
"Now the library seems a place where I would like to be".
"I always found interesting that you are smart".
A sultry heat completely comes over me, my knees get a little weak and I have to lean against the door to keep myself up from falling. I see him sighing while he lifts the beanie from his eyes, he winks the right one and I just can't keep going on with this, although escaping is not an option because we have to plan a robbery.
"W-whatever".
I throw the few belongings I brought with me at the foot of the bed and I come closer to collapse there, in the middle of the floor, confused about all this but also somewhat relieved; confused since I have no idea how to try to approach to him again without feeling that he rejects me, or without feeling that all my attempts are useless because he can do it a thousand times better and without even thinking about it; relieved that at least something in him really feels the same as me, I have no idea if with the same intensity but at least there's something.
Maybe I shouldn't think so much about those things, or maybe I need to feel that my thoughts are going to kill me, it worked the last time. Or maybe…
"Or we could share the bed, which seems like a great idea now that I said it aloud" his warm breath and the growling in his voice against my right ear erases 'sanity' from the words I know. Before anything else can happen he bites my earlobe slightly. "But, after all, we will not be here after tonight".
He stands up and forces me to do so, he starts to open each and every one of the drawers and compartments in the dorm while I stand there, frozen, static with something strange caught in my throat.
Where is this going? I don't have the foggiest idea.
"So then, what do you think about all those goodie goodies?" he pokes his head out the window and by the movements he's making with his head, at the same time he places both of his arms in the frame, I know that there must be someone down there, a girl is the most viable option.
And this time I don't feel angry about it. It's his nature.
"Do I have something to say about it? They're awful, and good people, the sooner we get out of here the better".
The deep growl of my stomach seems to rumble around the whole dorm, I can almost swear that it was audible on the opposite end of the huge building. It's not the first time it does a similar sound, it has done them like that since I can remember, but today it seems decided to bother me more because I was running all morning away from mom to catch up with the guys to get our mission from Maleficent; mom behaves nicely when she's in public, out there is less likely from her to find a way to punish me for not doing something, and only the likelihood decreases, it doesn't mean she always does.
Jay splits away from the window, he rolls his eyes and smiles, he pats me on the shoulder before placing his arm around my shoulders and forces me to walk.
"Let's find something to eat first or you'll ruin the plan, besides I'm also starving".
It happens again that some kind of synchronicity that exists in the four of us is perfect and acts at the same time since we find both Mal and Evie in the middle of the hallway, also aimed to get something to eat.
While we move through the hallways and courtyards, huge but yet filled with people, in the usual molding (Jay in the front, Mal and Evie with their arms linked behind him, and me in the end) I can notice that people here don't know a thing about discretion: I keep hearing their whispers and questions about whether if Ben lost his mind to bring us here, that accompanied by one or another person who has the audacity to point out to us.
It's funny the moment when we walk into the cafeteria. Everything, everything remains in a deep silence that could almost match that one from a graveyard, or that one from the forest where we were venturing yesterday, the expressions of surprise are too noticeable, even some people fled through the emergency exit.
"If they behave like that when they see us I can't help but keep imagining the way in which they would beg for mercy when we have the wand in our hands" Mal says between murmurs, settling a strand of hair behind her right ear.
"I'll live in a huge castle and there will be hundreds of princes to meet my requests" Evie seems to be lost in her thoughts rather on what's going on, Mal makes an expression like saying 'are you serious?' similar to that she did when she heard that about the princes in the Isle.
"I'll need more arms to carry all the loot that I'll get from all of them" Jay smiles like if he owned the place. The three of them turn their heads in my direction, waiting for me to let out my future plans when we rule Auradon and all the kingdoms attached.
"Uh… I'd love to see some things on fire".
"Or destroy something already destroyed, like it's your specialty" he says with a smile that makes a girl who I hadn't seen standing next to him sigh, Mal and Evie laugh while I shrug. That was a low blow.
We completely ignore the huge line in front of the huge table filled of food, ignoring the complaints of the people who were waiting for the others to get served themselves, and we simply take all we can pull together with our hands. Evie looks at us with disappointment, I guess for the lack of manners or something like that, but she has the bright idea to give us some trays, which we only use to place just a little from the extra charge we carry in our arms.
Mal shoos away with her gaze a couple of girls in one of the farthest tables of the cafeteria, she and Evie take a sit in front of us, their shoulders are touching while I try to keep some distance from Jay. What he said was actually a little hurtful.
Why am I getting sensitive?
"At least you have some idea of what you took?" Evie stretches her back and looks at all of us, she begins to cut small pieces of what looks like a piece of meat overcooked bathed in cranberry sauce. "Right now I'm at a point between what is most disgusting: Jay showing the worst manners of the universe or Carlos still covered in chocolate".
I duck my head and use the square of fabric that I guess is supsed to be a napkin to try to eliminate the most notable remains of the small car heist we had. It's embarrassing, but when I move my head up again the pleased, wide and white smile from Evie tells me I managed to eliminate the disgust she had for me.
"Whatever it is it's too much, and it's free, so you will not hear a complaint from me for now" growls Jay with his mouth full, Evie closes her eyes and makes a gesture of disgust to try to eliminate the image of him using the hands and the back of his hand to remove the leftovers. He was smart enough to move his long hair from his way.
"Maybe use a fork? People often use them to eat" Mal says while stretching one in his direction, he responds with a snort.
"You know that in the Isle they would use it to take an eye out from you if you look at something on the plate of someone else for more than ten seconds".
"If you try that I'm sure it would be the last thing you do" Mal turns the fork between her fingers, a threat.
"Guys, people are looking at us. We'll plan killings later".
They stop challenging themselves with their gaze and we all go back to the food, or something like that: Mal chews and tries to disguise her expression of joy for trying something so good, Evie remains focused on her manners and her lip gloss, Jay eats, swallows and growls with everything that it's in front of him and with what he achieves to take from my tray each time he stretches his left hand, he takes some too oddly shaped veggies, some pieces of meat wrapped in mushrooms and French fries.
My lunch is based on an apple (half-eaten) and small pieces of the crust from a rye bread. Suddenly I'm not so hungry, he notices it.
"Eat something" he growls while he lows down a few slices of rye bread with a glass of water.
"I'm not hungry".
"I'm not asking, do it".
I roll my eyes and push the tray away in protest at his order, I place both of my arms on the table and rest my chin over my forearms. I hear him whispering the word 'idiot' and he stands up, I guess he went to find something he haven't tried out yet, but right now I feel in a very bad mood to follow him with that. Auradon is toxic.
"I think I'll go get another pair of cupcakes, they're delicious!" Evie cleans the corners of her lips gently with the cloth napkin, she folds it into a square and stands up, Mal goes behind her.
I stare right at a few sunflower seeds while the loud sounds of a school like this drills deep into the depths of my eardrums. I'm too pissed and frustrated by all this and by so many other things that being lost in the woods of the Isle doesn't seem a bad idea after all, the sound of a heavy tray placing beside me decides to thwart my reverie.
"You'll need energy for tonight" I shrug my shoulders a little more and keep looking at the seeds. "Whatever, see ya later" I raise my right hand just enough for him to know that I heard that, he pats me on the shoulder and walks to go by the emergency exit.
I look around at the cafeteria and something strange comes over me, it's another one of those moments when I stop to think about how my life would be if I wasn't me, or at least if I wasn't a de Vil.
Would I be enrolled in this same school, surrounded by this same people, with parents who care about me instead of ordering me and punishing me, doing exactly the same things that good people do in their daily life here? It's not like if I wanted a spell to change the past, in one way or another everything would go down to be the same.
Destiny, I have to take that into consideration from now on. It's my/our destiny to steal the wand, it's my/our destiny to destroy the barrier, it's my/our destiny to witness the new order of things when Madame Maleficent rule here. It's my/our destiny to change everything.
"Where the hell is Jay?" Mal asks while she sits down again, extremely irritated and with that frightening green glow in her eyes. "He was here a minute ago".
"Isn't it obvious?" I lift up and notice the pile of desserts that's on my side. I refuse to touch them. "He just ate, he's working out, and by that I mean to steal a few things he finds around".
"You seem to know him quite well" Evie places both of her arms on the table and rests her face on her open hands, she raises her eyebrows like if she were trying to say something else, I don't understand all of it.
"We've been friends for nearly a thousand years ago, I would have to learn some things about him one way or another".
"And it seems that your named 'friendship' decided to change yesterday, doesn't it?" Mal pouts in her smirk. I'm about to answer that it did when a moment of rationality comes over me, because the answer is not a yes, but neither is a no; the answer is just 'I have no idea'.
"Actually we haven't talked about it" the nervousness in my voice and a slight temperature rising in my cheeks speaks better for me. I'm not sure that I want to hear something about it.
They share a knowing look, then a smile and finally a pair of raised eyebrows. I may be smaller than them but I know what they're up to.
"E, we're going, let's see in smarty-pants here can decipher a few things on his own" Evie nods and stands up, twirling a few times to show off her outfit. "We'll visit you two later to think about things… if you know what I mean".
"Yeah, yeah, whatever you say, see ya".
The wand. Madame Maleficent. Jay. Feelings. Auradon. Going back to the Isle if we're caught. Evil taking the world. Can all that be achieved in such a short period of time? I can't imagine the result.
Mission: Steal Fairy Godmother's wand and release our parents from the Isle so destruction come to govern Auradon. Status: Failure. Epic failure.
The way back to the Prep is quiet, too much for the liking of either of us. Mal and Evie exchange distressed glances and keep themselves with their heads down, Jay goes in front of us, he's about five meters away from us and even back here I can hear him whispering a wide repertoire of insults I didn't believe he even possessed.
Fairy Godmother would have a heart attack if she heard him.
I stay as far away from them since I don't want to share the distressed looks from the girls, also because Evie will still seeing me as a wounded animal or something, Mal doesn't really enjoys being around with me, and it really seems to be nothing that can raise Jay's mood, not something that can breathe after he finishes taking out his frustration.
We enter to the school circular path and avoid a few guards, we enter to the main hallway about two minutes before we hear the heavy doors closing. I can almost swear there are archers on the roofs to avoid any turmoil, although this is Auradon, surely the greatest danger that they may have here is a pack of puppies in search of their mother.
Jay ignores the wish of good night from Evie (nightmares and some threats lurking under his bed) and keeps walking straight ahead, he turns to the left to start hitting the walls he can find, I know that because of the sound that appears to rumble in the whole building.
"I hope he's better in the morning" Evie shrugs, she doesn't stop looking at the point where Jay disappeared.
"Never mind, I'd rather spend an eternity grounded to spend another day here" Mal's eyes flash with the characteristic green of her family.
"I hope so".
There are about two hundred things I want to tell her about it formulating in my head, but because she has magic at her disposal I'd rather not be turned into ashes, at least not today.
I fasten my pace until I'm about two strides away from him, I open my mouth to start a conversation but I'm not sure I can continue it, not without knowing that I will receive monosyllables or him simply sending me to hell.
"It's stupid, right?" he stops at the moment and turns his head a little. "I mean it makes no sense to set an alarm over an object as stupid as that if supposedly no one in here would do something wrong with it".
The loud stomps he makes when he walks again make clear that I returned to remind him of his failure, which wasn't my intention at all.
When we arrive to the front of the dorm I look into the pockets of my shorts for the key of it, he decides to take out a little of his anger and he opens the door with a kick. Surprisingly the lock doesn't break, but the blow of the door when it hits the wall makes some lights to get on, we hasten to enter and to follow whatever that comes out of this here.
"Listen… everything will be…" he turns on his heels and he points at me so accusingly with a finger, his arm trembles by the force he applies on it, he comes closer with strides and I step back until my head is the first thing to hit a wall, then my whole body gets supported against the wall.
"Don't you dare to say that everything will be fine tomorrow, don't you dare" he clenches his jaw and I can see myself with a bruise on my right eye.
I close my fists so tightly that I hear some cracks, I dare to look into his eyes and I can see that with which he fights against so much, that thing that had him in pointless searches and wishing to cause good impressions with what he does: disappointment.
Jafar would have said to him that he's useless and a good for nothing, that would have caused in him to go out late at night and steal everything that's not fixed to the ground to try to make amends. On the nights when mom had me brushing each and every one of her coats I used to watch him sprinting in the cover of night, fetching and carrying lots of objects.
If at any time I thought of stopping him then now I know that I would face a look and a so violent reaction like those from now.
"I-If you're going to beat me just d-do it and done" I gasp and move my head to the right, giving him space enough so at least I can say I tripped over something or fell out of bed.
The punch doesn't come, instead of that he holds my chin with the kindness that I never thought there could have someone that does what he does. I open my eyes nervously and his expression changes completely, the total opposite to what had attacked a few ago milliseconds: he frowns slightly, his eyes are somewhat more opened, his lower lip trembles, the hectic breathing says another bit.
"I-I…" he hesitates and breaks our eye contact, he scratches his nape with his free hand and sighs heavily. This is new. "W-well, I think that w-what I want to say is that…".
I move his arms away and extend mine to wrap his torso, I place my right cheek over his chest while his whole body stiffens, he breathes haltingly and I don't know if it's him who's trembling for what I'm doing or it's me for having done so without thinking about it.
"It's okay" a second later his right hand goes into my hair and the other gets placed in my lower back, he caresses each strand while I fight my urge to rub my nose against his muscles. "It's okay".
"No, it's not okay…" the ragged breath that accompanies that makes me to look up. It's the first time I see him so… sad, crestfallen, defeated, whatever that makes him feel thus. "I don't wanna be a downer, I don't wanna disappoint any of you, or dad… not anyone on the Isle".
It's easy to notice that he doesn't say that last part seriously, but I decide not to point that out and let him to snort how he needs to relax a little.
"I guess that we'll get the wand one way or another" he growls softly, that makes something in my head to doesn't seem to be fine, everything seems to be slightly hazy and too warm, "I'll take it as an accident, and accidents happen all the tim…".
I don't know what comes over me that banks to do that; maybe it was the fact that something in his voice told all these things but between lines he was saying 'do it', maybe it was the closeness between us and the heat radiating from him, perhaps it was the memory of his soft lips against mine. Whatever it is, I get up on my toes and the pressure of that little kiss doesn't last more than two seconds, two seconds that surely seemed long hours.
When I completely put my feet on the floor one of his hands cups my cheek, his thumb moves over my cheekbone and something like a shriek escapes from my throat without my authorization. He looks into my eyes, I can notice how shocked he is for what I did, I can also feel the sickening heat in the cheeks.
"Alright… this is new" the tip of his nose moves against mine, we both let out stupid laughter that, back on the Isle, it would have led to his desire to beat people to be present, "no one had kissed me before" I frown since that's a huge lie, I can make a long list of people who had kissed him before. "I mean I'm usually the one doing it, you're the first person who manages to kiss me without me being aware of it".
"Can I do it again?" the nice nervousness in my voice takes me by surprise but I really want to do it again. Again and hundreds of countless times… if he lets me.
"Mmmmh" he moves his gaze away for just a second, then the widest smile that I've ever seen on him adorns his lips before he nods a little, "yeah, you can".
Again I get up in my toes and again press his soft lips against mine, I close my eyes and for a second I wonder if he also feels what comes over me: the knees weak, the fast heartbeat, the chill in the back, all that and more, but at least in me highlights a deep need and a strong desire to never split away.
I'm so damn sensitive and weak, he knows it.
"What's all this?" I ask when I split away and open my eyes, I feel really confused about… I don't know whether to call it 'us', so I decide to call it 'this'. "I mean, usually people do this sort of things because there's something very strong among them, and I don't know if all this are signs of some kind or if I'm going crazy".
He frowns so confused that I refuse to laugh in his face, also this is a 'serious' issue.
"I'll correct all that: is there something between us?" the answer is a pressure of his lips on my forehead. Enough.
"You sound like if you were a person from here" I notice the displeasure in what he says, and I notice it in my body because it's a great insult. "For now I'll say that yeah, there is, but I'm too tired, frustrated and in need of a long shower to discuss it. Tomorrow morning".
He pulls me closer to his body, he kisses the top of my hair and his chin is placed there for a couple of seconds, then we both decide to end the hug at the same time.
He enters to the small bathroom of the dorm and all I can do is to sit on the mattress, the spongy feeling under me makes my hands to travel over the entire length of the blankets that cover it. At home bed is a word that doesn't have the same meaning that it has here: on the Isle, or at least for mom, and for me, bed means a lot of pieces of cardboard over a bunch of metal pipes with some fabric scraps to protect me from the night. Here it's like trying to find ways to define softness and warmth.
Everything changes when my head hits the pillows, then is when all the gloom, fatigue, a feeling of having run ten thousand kilometers comes straight over me. My eyelids weigh like hundreds of kilograms, my body is plunged into stupor and drowsiness. Sleep seems incredible now.
I don't hear the bathroom door when it opens but I do hear when he laughs slightly, the feeling of each of the parts of my body sinking into a deep sleep is so much for me to do something about it, so I let him to take off my boots and socks, he lifts me up so that he can slip me between the blankets and cover me with them.
"Sleep tight" the whisper and a kiss on my forehead is the last thing that I get.
