Title: 1000 Miles In 10 Seconds

Authoress: Ladya C. Maxine

Rating: T

Summary: see chapter one

Warnings: see chapter one

Disclaimer: I do not own Beyblade or any of its characters. Any and all unrecognizable characters belong solely to me and are not to be used period. I am not making any money off of this and I write with the sole intent to entertain.


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Ugh, mornings are evil.

Pure, unrestrained, unconquerably evil. How can something so cruel be allowed to take place on a daily basis? Sure, if it weren't for mornings we wouldn't have the distinction between night and day to begin with and one wouldn't be any wiser…but that's a lame excuse. I do like daytime. I mean, as a none-nocturnal creature I am most active during the day, though I've been physically active at night for the past seven weeks, if you know what I mean. Worst of all, mornings are inevitable. Let me correct myself, waking up is inevitable. Be it morning or afternoon. Kai respects the fact that I do not share his waking schedule, but he never lets me sleep in any later than 10 a.m. So I hate mornings, not afternoons.

Based on this ramble, it should be obvious that I am experiencing another hated awakening. I take 'Dawn of the Dead' to another level. I'm telling you, the title doesn't hold a candle to me as far as daybreak horror is concerned; I sometimes scare myself when I look in a mirror after getting out of bed. Kai's godliness is set in stone; not even my morning appearance can faze him. I'd run for the hills if I ever woke up next to something like me. Buddha bless him.

Mornings…Hate mornings…

I so don't want to get up. There's only one thing that can get me out of bed, and he's not here. Since today isn't Russian marathon day he must be somewhere downstairs, probably eating breakfast. It's the only meal of the day that we don't always share. Mainly my fault, though Kai could just put his skills to use and coax me out of bed, but seeing as we do pretty much everything else together we don't make too big a deal out of it. My first meal of the day is usually lunch really. I think I've only gotten worse since coming here. Back home in China it was a social duty to break my fast with the entire family. With the Bladebreakers I had to sacrifice my laziness in order to set a good example for Tyson. Obviously, my selflessness had no impact on him. What a waste. Luckily, here in Russia I am free to do what I want!

At least, when inside the house. As Kai put it yesterday, I cannot even say 'hello' in proper Russian. Coming to think of it, I don't even know the translation for 'hello'. I can say 'yes' (da), 'no' (nyet, or something like that) and 'zhopa', and that pretty much sums up my Russian vocabulary. I (inadvertently) learned all three words from Tala, who has a preference for the last two. He hardly agrees with anyone, so he only says 'da' when agreeing to disagree on something, but ninety percent of his dialogue with Bryan consists of 'zhopa' and 'nyet', depending on what level they're in. 'Nyet's are very prominent in Level 3's. Bryan must hate that word with a passion.

Now back to mornings.

Which I hate.

A lot.

Might as well get this over with. The longer I try to delay it, the more painful it becomes.

Slowly opening one eye, I am fascinated by the blurred world. Commence focusing. This is done best by having a focus point. Another ritual of mine. Instinctively, I turn to my left and fix my eyes on Kai's pillow. I don't think I've ever woken up to see him there. Kai considers waking up after seven a.m. as just plain lazy and undisciplined. My tardiness amuses and confuses him to no end. It's not my fault, coming to think of it. One, Kai keeps me up till late at night doing all kinds of things to me after we've retired to the bedroom; I'm the one who instigates it, but Kai always rises to the challenge (no pun intended). Second, this bed is to die for. Seriously, I'd defend it with my life. The body-conforming mattress, the fluffy pillows, the silky sheets, the heavy but cosy blanket; this bed induces wet dreams, not to mention almost coma-like sleep. After all, gods love comfort, no?

Alright, I am beginning to make out the patterns on Kai's pillowcase so my sight is improving, along with my awareness. The bed set is one basic colour (blue) but the edges of the sheets and pillowcases are decorated with white vines.

Tracing the curling leaves, I come across something different. Some more focusing is needed before I can come to the conclusion…that this thing does not belong to, or is part of, the pillowcase.

I told you: mornings aren't good to me.

Let's try again.

Focusing…Thinking…Alright, it's square in shape…no, a rectangle. Looks like it's leaning against the pillow. Kinda shiny…very thin…

This is getting to complicated. Screw it. I'd rather go back to sleep.

Alas, I'm halfway through identifying this thing; might as well get it over with. Having soundly analyzed the form, I check out the design, since its surface is pretty colourful. One thing in particular catches my eye, even if it's half-shut in sleep. Neon green in colour, it is pretty small and is but a fraction of the overall picture. My mind is slowly but surely beginning to turn. I should know what this is…

…2 minutes pass.

Picture? Ah! I'm looking at a photo. Good job. It doesn't have any business being in my bed, but I'm more interested in why its here instead of the fact that it simply is. Did Kai leave it for me to find? Is it a picture of him, meant to make my waking experience more pleasant…?

As if. Kai's not that sappy or perverted.

Besides, the person doesn't look like…Kai…uh…Wait…

"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!"

I hit the floor screaming, the sheets having tangled themselves around my legs. Never have I gotten out of bed so quickly at one go. I must have just broken my own record. And my tail bone. Still, that's nothing compared to the agonizing burn on my retina. No matter how much I rub my eyes I cannot get it, or the image, away. Where's a fork when you need one? Someone get me a medic, preferably an eye surgeon! It hurstsss!

Well fine, so maybe I'm overreacting a bit here.

Pulling myself together, I peek over the edge of the mattress. The photo is still there, slightly tilted to one side since my floor dive jostled it a bit. The image taunts me. Daring me to stare directly at it. That tiny sliver of neon green? It's a swimming trunk. No, worse. Speedos. If that isn't bad enough, guess who's modelling it?

"Hiro," I growl.

No, it's not Hiro on the photo, but I just know that he's the one who sent it. It wouldn't have been nowhere near as scary if it had been Hiro proudly posing in this illegal get up. But who else would have, and send me, a photo of Papa G in this bright colour swimwear, wearing nothing else? Is…Is it a G-string? Egads! Old men in tight, revealing garments (or lack thereof) have got to be high on the parental censorship committee's list. I repeat, my eyessss!

"Finally up?"

Kai closes the door behind him. Watching me where I am still on the floor, he raises a brow. I'm not fooled by the nonchalant expression. That photo did not fall out of the sky and land so strategically placed before my eyes. Drinking in the sight of Kai wearing loose pyjama bottoms and a black t-shirt, I can feel the burn lessening. Looking at him is like therapy for the mind and soul, though I am going to be in need of some serious counselling after this incident.

"Did you have to leave that there?" I ask, pointing with a shaky finger at the photo, still perched high and mighty on the bed.

"No."

Just no. No explanations. No apologies. No fair.

"Where did you get it?"

"Came in the mail this morning with a letter from Granger," he answers, pulling me to my feet. "That photo was specially addressed to you."

"How considerate," I grumble, nuzzling his neck and sighing.

He tilts my head back to give me my first morning kiss. It's his way of rewarding me for getting up, depending on how late that is. The later I embrace the start of the day, the briefer my morning kisses. I once, by some freak force of nature, woke up at six. We were both breathless by the time Kai was done rewarding me. So, mornings do have their advantages…

"What are we going to do today?" I ask, not letting him go. I can feel Papa G's cheesy grin mocking the back of my head.

Hiro, be prepared for an onslaught of hate mails.

"Not much. We're having guest for lunch tomorrow, though."

"Guest?" I repeat, leaning back. "Since when do those two qualify as guest? They invite themselves over and they practically live here fifty percent of the time."

"Not Tala and Bryan," he dismisses, unlacing my arms from around his waist. I follow him to one of the doors on his side of the bedroom. They are the gateway to his walk-in closet, which is really another huge room. He stares in with a guarded expression. "My grandfather."

Having wrapped my arms around him once more, my chin resting contently on his shoulder, my wide yawn turns into a series of hacks. Luckily, I'm of a sound enough mind to turn away before I damage his hearing. Thumping my chest, I grab the closest bed post for support. Another reason to hate mornings: bad news is always its worst when it is delivered early in the day, because then it just ruins your entire day.

"Your grandfather? Voltaire?" I wince at his very name, even though I'm the one who said it. "Is something wrong? Did you two fight? Does it have something to do with Biovolt? Does he want you to use Black Dranzer again? Do you have to go back to the Abbey?"

While I go on to list a number of theories, Kai calmly picks out his attire for the day. From his choice it's obvious that he's going out. Probably to get a few things for the upcoming visit, like a shotgun or arsenic. By the time he emerges from the closet I have somehow convinced myself that Voltaire is planning on kidnapping him using an apache helicopter. Finally looking up from his folded clothes, and noticing my expression, he raises a brow.

"Are you done?"

Not really, but obviously you have something to say that will be a hell of a lot more sensible than my rambling.

I nod.

"It's just mandatory. He always comes once a month but he got caught up last month."

"So, it's just his way of checking up on you or something?"

He makes a 'kinda/kinda not' gesture.

"Mostly business and legal things, as well as planning my future as heir."

This brings up one vital question in my mind.

"Does he know about us?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"I haven't spoken with him in three months."

"But you spoke with him today, didn't you? Why didn't you tell him?"

He pauses, in the process of removing his pants. Watching him change is usually one of the highlights of my day, but for once something more important has come up. Whenever Kai pauses in anything he does it's not a good thing.

"He's not an easy person to discuss such matters over the phone with."

"Kai," I argue, "isn't this alternative worse? He's going to show up unprepared and see me here. What's he going to say? What's he going to do?"

"That's my problem," he says, sitting on the edge of the bed to pull off his pants.

"Does he at least know that you're gay?"

"No."

"Cripes…" I sigh, burying my head in my hands.

Kai doesn't seem to share my concern, if that contemptuous, but sexy, smirk is any indication. He gets a real kick out of going against his grandfather's wishes any way he can. He's quite rebellious, my boyfriend. He's the type who'd buy something in a no-refund store and then return it a day later and demand his money back, just to tick them off. He's never done anything like that, but he's the type who would. I, on the other hand, am but human and can experience pain and distress so things like this do plague me.

"Will he take it alright in person?"

"Again, my problem to deal with," Kai repeats, pulling up his dark denim jeans. Seeing my worried countenance, he adds, "He is a very difficult man and I'm not expecting him to be in the least bit understandable. Just let me handle him the same way I've always have. Whatever he says, you're here because I want you to be. He has no saying in that."

"Okay," I whisper.

I have to admit that I am a bit scared. I don't know Voltaire. I haven't seen him for more than 2 years now and my first impression of him is not one on which I'd like to base our future relationship, but I have no choice. The man's a…a…meanie. There's no other way to describe him. Sure, he's finally figured out that taking over the world went out about seven decades ago, and that there are many legal ways to beat down and control others through his business empire, but that does not change his nature, which is grumpy, old fashion and tyrannical. I pray every night that Kai will not grow up to be like him. I still don't know anything about his father, but Kai clearly has inherited some of his traits from Voltaire: his determination, cynicism, low-tolerance for foolishness, distrust and 'hatred' towards clowns. Strange heritage, ain't it?

"Breakfast is waiting for you downstairs," Kai says, fully dressed. He kisses me quickly. "I'm going out later."

"I'll come with you," I say automatically.

I always go out with him when he has to run into town for something. Even if it's for boring corporate work or just to pick up something in a store; I spend as much time around him as possible. The only two times we are not always together is during breakfast and when he's with Thing 1 and Thing 2 (a.k.a. Tala and Bryan).

I want to hold him forever, but Kai actually has a life that calls on him. Giving me a final kiss, he leaves, closing the door behind him soundly. Sinking back onto the bed, I stare at my trembling fingers.

I hate meeting new people. Voltaire isn't a new face (just an ugly one) but I know next to nothing about him other than what Kai has told me, and, in turn, Voltaire knows nothing about me. I'm just one of those pesky kids who ruined his take-over-the-world scheme a couple years back. I don't think that he even knows, or cares for, my name. I'm expected to make a good presentation tomorrow, by both myself and Kai. How am I ever going to pull off a presentable appearance if I don't even want to make a personal appearance?

Say he doesn't blow a gasket or shoot us both dead where we stand; what will Voltaire think about our relationship? What will he think about me? Is he going to interrogate me to see if I am worthy of his grandson? Worthy of living off of the Hiwatari fortune and sharing the Hiwatari estate with his only other kin and heir?

I'm getting ahead of myself.

I should be more worried about whether he'll accept me despite me and Kai sharing the same gender. It wouldn't be so bad if he knew that Kai's gay, but this is going to be a double slap to the face. And while he might shout at Kai and accuse him of being unfaithful to their regal bloodline, I shudder to think what he'll say or do to me. Kai's his heir (as it appears that Kai's father and Voltaire aren't on the best of terms). Voltaire won't risk bringing any harm upon him. Me? I'm a disposable village boy without a village. I'm doomed, aren't I?

No, I can't think like that!

Kai won't let anything happen to me. He keeps Bryan at bay. Bryan. A semi-sane elder beyond his glory years can't possibly be more dangerous than a clinically psychotic teen in his prime. Voltaire can rant and rave all he wants, but the only person who is going to be walking out the front doors at the end of the day is him. I have nothing to worry about. It won't be pretty and I'm expecting some harsh words and derogatory names, but it's only one visit, for a couple of hours. I've survived having Tala and Bryan loitering about for days on end; one disgruntled old fart is not going to scare me away.

Considerably cheered, I stand and begin the tedious process that it making myself presentable. Choosing and changing my clothes take less than five minutes, but my hair consumes up to an hour of my time. First I have to untangle it gently with my fingers, then comb it, then brush it, then wrap it. My arms get quite a workout going through the routine, but having been doing this for years it all comes naturally so I prefer to spend the time thinking while my hands do the work. Most of the time, I gripe and grumble about how Kai doesn't have to go through this lengthy procedure. One swipe of his fingers through his hair and he's ready for front-page and magazine cover worthy photos. Per-Fec-Tion.

Kai…

Why is he with me? Not that I'm still angsting over what Voltaire will think, but really, why has Kai chosen to be with me? What's so attractive about me? He loves me. He's told me that. What I don't know is whether or not he truly understands what love is. He's admitted in the past to being unfamiliar with it and how it feels. He does have feelings for me. I am more than a team mate or a friend, but…but what then? Does he see me as someone he appreciates, or as someone he just likes having around, or as someone who he feels like he has to care for, or as someone who he genuinely loves?

Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that he's stringing me along. But he's never experienced love in his entire life: his distant relationship with his parents; his strained and spiteful relationship with Voltaire; his dominated ex-relationship with Boris. The Bladebreakers were his team. He treated them (reasonably) well, but there has always been a rift between us and him, until I made the leap over to his side and he allowed me to stay.

Much to my resignation, the only other strong bond Kai has ever had, and still does, is between him and the Lovers Grimm. Mortal combat between Tala and Bryan happens everyday, but they hardly argue with Kai. Tala can be bitchy at times (cough) and Bryan does not like it that he cannot do whatever he wants when around Kai, but they never harbour any bad feelings towards him. They just send those hate waves in my direction, but that's not the point I'm trying to make here. Kai's past ties with others haven't been the most reliably healthy ones a guy can have.

A funny thing, I've just noticed, is that though we're an item, I do not consider Kai to be gay. Yeah, I mentioned it earlier, but the term 'gay' is meant for mortals; Kai must have some alien race millions of light years away worshipping statues of him. Tyson once proposed that Kai was asexual and I couldn't really argue with that, though I had gotten down on my knees that night and begged Buddha that it wasn't so. This guy can snap his fingers and he'd have the world's female population on their knees, along with the entire gay community, but he just never seemed interested. He didn't look at girls, he didn't look at guys, he didn't look at anyone. He's not attracted to me because I'm a guy. If we were to break up (Buddha forbid) he wouldn't go bar hopping for another pretty boy. It makes me feel terribly humbled and special. Kai's with me because I'm…me. Because I'm someone who has caught his attention and interest. He doesn't care whether I'm a guy or a girl. At least, that's the impression I get from him.

He looks at me a lot. Just looks, like he's studying my features, trying to learn more about me. I know he's curious. Though he's indifferent most of the time, the truth is that Kai Hiwatari is one inquisitive creature. It takes a while, but once he's onto something he doesn't stop until he knows everything about it. I tease him when I catch him staring and he'll brush it off or smirk and kiss me, but it might be because he himself is wondering what to make of it all: our relationship…me.

Why am I being so introspective so early in the morning?

Kai loves me. I love Kai. We both love each other very, very, very, very much, regardless of what the true definition of love is. Voltaire can drop dead for all I care. Tala and Bryan aren't scheduled for another blow-out for the next couple of hours. Those are the facts and I am just fine with leaving them at that. So maybe I should go back to sleep--

"Mother fu--!"

I forgot about that photo. It's even scarier at second glance.

Picking it up between two fingers gingerly, I toss it over onto the floor on Kai's side of the bed. He brought it in here; he'll be the one to dispose of it. I'm curious as to what Hiro has to say in his letter. This is the second letter we've gotten from him. Kai really couldn't care less if Hiro fell off the face of the earth, though he'd be much pleased if he dragged Brooklyn down with him as he fell, but I like to keep track of everyone's life back (or is it ahead?) in Japan.

I wrote them a general letter once I had settled in here just to apologize to the team for my sudden departure and to assure them that I was alright. Kai gave me permission to send them the manor's number so they called us in response. It felt good hearing their voices again, especially since I had been afraid that they'd be uncomfortable with the idea that they were talking to a guy who could have been scoping them out in the past. I think that my major clash with Lee and Mariah actually helped; having witnessed first hand how I have been shunned by my childhood friends and possibly my home, the guys felt more sympathy for me and want to prove that they are better than that. What really blew them away, though, was that I'm now with Kai. Kai, who Tyson believed was asexual, is with someone? And another guy at that? Tyson admits that he still finds it too weird to fully understand, but things are cool between us all the same.

I'm glad he's okay with it because he's going to get an even bigger surprise when his big brother announces his relationship with Brooklyn. From their letters I can tell that, despite needing to keep things under wraps, they are doing fine. Bruce is once again travelling on archaeological expeditions, but Hiro has decided to stay put for a while and is living with Tyson and Papa G in the dojo. Thank Buddha, I say. With him there those two may still have a chance to learn how to be normal human beings.

Brooklyn's living with Garland, who is stinking rich with a mansion in the country as well as an apartment in the city. Tyson is often out with the others; Papa G spends a lot of time teaching younger kids; Garland is now training to be a professional kick boxer. This gives Hiro and Brooklyn plenty of alone time. I have received pictures of the two of them, along with Her Royal Majesty Isabella Teresa, who Brooklyn has groomed into a massive wad of fluff, over the internet and they are just glowing. I actually want to be there the day they tell the others. I'll even drag Kai along to support them. After all, they supported me during the Christmas heydays.

Something soft tickles my ankle and meows

"There you are," I smile, picking up the little fuzz ball that was my Christmas present from Kai, and is my most cherished possession he has ever given me: Tiger. "Guess you spent the morning with Kai while I slept, huh?"

He has grown a lot in the past seven weeks and can now jump up on pretty high places and climb drapes. I'm sure he gives the servants headaches with the mess he makes of the place, but I haven't gotten any complaints yet. I do feel guilty about the now shattered priceless vase in the library, though. My saving grace is that since Kai's the one who bought him for me, he cannot complain about the damage this tiny thing can inflict. Besides, one of Tala's wayward projectiles accidentally knocked a crystal chandelier clean off the ceiling and onto the antique dinner table below a couple weeks back. Kai had to have the chandelier, table and carpet replaced for a small sum of nearly a thousands of dollars.

And that had been during a Level 2 tantrum. One of the upstairs bedroom has only recently been rebuilt after a massive Level 3 climax ended with a beyblade battle.

Tiger's just a playful creature; Tala and Bryan are just home wreckers, in the literal sense.

I put Tiger on my night table, where he curls up, and finish doing my hair. Finally satisfied, I pick some random, but designer, outfit and change. When I wake up in a good enough mood, which is a very seldom, I take a morning shower first before changing. I had the sleep scared out of me twice by an old goat in tight trunks; not the best way of waking up, so no shower for me. Besides, sharing showers with Kai is something this tiger does best.

I'm not horny; I'm just environmentally conscious. Do you know how much water we save by showering together?...Alright, not much. It takes us less than five minutes to actually shower, but kissing each other into a sweat while we leave the water running can go on for half an hour. So I use less water when I shower alone, but then it isn't nearly as much fun. Pleasure over priority, that's what I believe in. Let other people worry about the environment; I have one hot boyfriend to molest, er, love.

I hate mornings…but the rest of the day spent with Kai always makes up for that.

Time to get some breakfast.


Seeing as, for once, I'm waiting on Kai so that we can go to town together, I've got time so let me fill you in on something you (thankfully) missed out and then you can decide on whether or not Hiro's being insensitive. By the way, this has reference to the photo he sent of Papa G sporting a G-string, taken four or five years ago at a public pool. He wrote on the back of the photo that the senior was subsequently banned from all pools in the area and two mothers tried to sue him for insensitive exhibitionism. The reason why he sent it, other than for a cheap scare, is as a response to what I wrote him in my last letter concerning my own experience in bathing trunks here in Russia.

Less than a month ago, on January 19th to be exact, I experienced an epiphany. Not 'a sudden realization or comprehension of the essence or meaning of something', but the real deal: The Epiphany, as in one of the most important Russian holidays. Hiro can laugh all he wants, but I'd love to see him go through it with as much dignity as I did. To be honest, I didn't leave a lasting impression on those who witnessed it. Scratch that, I did leave a lasting impression, but not a good one.

It haunted me for weeks. I was so embarrassed and my pride scuffed beyond repair. It was so bad I had been tempted to hop on the first plane to China and beg my parents to take me back. It was a horrible, horrible, horrible experience…

So it goes without saying that Tala and Bryan are to blame.

Let's go back, back, back to the beginning…Er, of this year anyway.

Cue flashback

"I'm coming too."

All three of them turn towards me, two already smirking, one doubtful.

"This isn't something you should get involved in," Kai says.

"If the three of you are going then why can't I?" I challenge.

He opens his mouth to tell me why but Tala, in a suspicious moment of sociability, cuts him off.

"This isn't something for outsiders," he says in English. "Just stay in bed and wait for your master like a good little kitten."

(Interjection: I should have been suspicious of his challenging tone. I should have noticed the sly glance he and Bryan shared. I should have allowed Kai to explain what I was insisting on taking part in, because to be honest I didn't know what it was. But I was growing tired of being left out of their soirees. Somehow, through some cracked sixth sense, I'd managed to figure out that they were planning another excursion and I refused to be left behind. I was dead-set on coming along. I should have known better…)

"You can't handle it anyway," Bryan add, sitting on the iron rail next to Tala.

"I can," I insist, still not to letting Kai get a word in. "What time?"

The two look at each other triumphantly, in their own sinister way.

" 0700," Tala answers.

"I'll be there."

And thus I seal my fate, selling my soul to the devil's pimps.

"Why did you do that?" Kai asks fifteen minutes later after we've left them making out in the corridor before their apartment door. "You don't even know what it is you've agreed to."

"Whatever it is, I'll do it," I say resolutely. "In fact, don't tell me what it is. I'll do it no matter what."

Kai sighs, mutters something in Russian and takes my hand as we walk home.

The next morning, at 6.30 a.m., which to me is basically midnight, Kai drags me out of bed and tells me to put on my swimming trunks under my clothes. So they had intended on going for a nice swim at the local health club without me, hadn't they? Tala must be hoping to hold me under water but I'm a strong swimmer so I'm not worried. Kai makes one last attempt to talk me out of coming but I simply toss him his coat and tell him to hurry up before we were late.

It is bloody freezing outside. Something like minus 15 degrees Celsius. I had hoped that someone would drive us to our destination but Kai tells me that we aren't going far. Despite the cold the sky is clear and blue and there isn't much wind so I don't have a good enough reason to insist on a chauffeur so we're walking it. I am surprised to find that traffic isn't heavy, despite it being a weekday. The people we come across are unusually jolly. Not that Russians are sombre people, but when every single pedestrian is smiling or laughing on what I perceive as an average day I am detecting that something's up. I think about going against my own resolution and asking Kai what is going on but stupidity wins out in the end.

We meet up with Tala and Bryan at what has to be the meeting point since the health club is nowhere in sight. There are a lot of people here, though. The two have been waiting on us a block away from the Moskva river and, wearing twin grins of sheer immorality, now lead the way towards the water, where there are even more people. It's around this time that I realize that I am in trouble. Deep trouble. Literally deep trouble. Because guess what this is all about?

Again, January the 19th (as I found out only afterwards, due to bad communication) is a holy day in Russia when they celebrate the baptism of Jesus Christ. My knowledge of Christianity can fill one line in a notebook, mainly that: Christians believe in God and His Son. Apparently, this is expressed by many prayers and rituals. One of which, which is very popular here in Russia, is hacking holes in the three feet thick ice covering rivers and lakes in the dead of winter, and submerging one's body in ice cold, near freezing water, for up to ten seconds to cleanse oneself in what is called, roughly translated, 'The Blessing of the Water', every January 19. Now, despite having been taught otherwise back home, I respect other religions. I know that many find my own religious upbringing weird, but, on the other hand, we should not judge what we do not fully understand. This isn't purely a Russian thing; Christians all around the world do it. So I understand where those living in, say the tropics are coming from. But Russian rivers in winter are liquid death traps! By tradition one must dip themselves in 'a body of water', according to Kai, my only guide to Christianity. Does it say in the Bible that you have to risk your life in winter waters with temperatures that are hypothermia-guaranteed when you can just as well go to one of the indoor hot springs or swimming pool? I was considering converting to Christianity, since by neko-jin standards I am no longer considered a member of our village's religious sector, but I might wait a while longer before doing so.

Why am I even thinking about becoming a Christian? Let's face it, I grew up with a unique, secluded but strict religion that is practiced by only the people in my village. I am no longer a welcomed member there, mainly due to this same religion strongly condemning homosexuality, so why should I continue to follow it? The elders claim that we follow an ancient form of Buddhism, something I've always doubted since Buddhism is an ancient religion; but when you compare Buddhism to our religion the only similarity is that they both worship Buddha. The values and norms are completely different. I have been considering becoming a (real) Buddhist for years. Now that I'm with Kai, and because I want to put my past way, way behind me, I did some deep soul searching and felt that it would be the right to convert to Christianity. I'm still mulling over it.

I keep to my stories like a drunk driver keeps to his side of the road; back to my Epiphany experience.

Hundreds of Russians stripping to their underwear and swimming suits, dozens submerged up to their necks in biting cold water, my breath frosting from my already slightly blue lips, Kai giving me his told-you-so stare, Tala and Bryan looking like it's Christmas all over again; nothing good is going to come out of this. Kai is silently urging me not to join them as they move forward and begin to remove their outer layers of clothing. Common sense is telling me to heed his warning…but Tala has that goddamned irritating look of superiority on his pretty face as he and Bryan, both in nothing but their swimming shorts, shoot me taunting smirks and proceed to the edge of the carved opening. Undaunted despite some of their moaning fellow Russians, they slip smoothly into the dark waters. Whereas many people are gasping, shivering and turning ghastly pale, they don't even flinch. Show offs. I bet that they couldn't do it if it weren't for their training back in the abbey. Besides, who is Tala trying to impress? He's a freaking ice blader! Ice and cold is nothing to him; he can generate blizzards as an attack! Subzero air and artic waters go unregistered in his body. And Bryan does not register anything, mentally or physically, be it slowly freezing to death or bringing misery upon others.

They pull themselves out about twenty seconds later and get some blessings from a priest (or minister, or cleric; I am not familiar with the holy men of the Christian churches) before returning to us. They don't even have the decency to shiver once. Instead, they merely dry themselves off with the towels they've brought along and effortlessly get dressed, whereas others have lost all feelings in their fingers and hands or are shaking too badly to even put on their clothes. I am silent the entire time, my pride and my conscious doing fierce battling in my mind.

"Cold feet?" the redhead asks, now comfy cosy next to Bryan.

Kai shakes his head in exasperation but begins to undress along with me. Tala's derogatory tone has pushed me to the desire to prove him wrong and so, already hating myself when I feel the first slap of cold air as I remove my shirt, I join Kai.

"Kai?" I say softly as we walk towards the ominous surface of water. Walking bare footed through inches of snow is not something I've ever done before, nor do I ever want to do it again. Goosebumps spring up all over my exposed skin and my teeth are already chattering.

"Hn?"

"Is it a sin to participate in a religious ceremony when you aren't even a believer?"

"I'd be more worried about contracting gangrene if I were you."

"…"

End flashback

I'm not going to describe exactly what happened next in detail. In a nutshell: we got in, we stayed there for three seconds, I passed out after four seconds, and Kai had to carry me out. I am so glad I was unconscious through it all. I wouldn't have been able to face Tala and Bryan's mocking smirks and leers, as well as the amused/worried/sympathetic looks from the people around us. The pain, shock and unbearable iciness of the water had made my brain practically shut down and sent my nervous system and muscles in a tizzy, according to the physician who treated me in the hospital afterwards. He used medical jargon to explain it to Kai, but what it all came down to was that I had been an idiot and pushed my body too far too soon into unknown territory. I had to spend the night in a hospital room. To my great relief, Kai stayed by my bedside the entire time and had his chauffeur pick us up the next morning. Once home Kai carried, yes carried (dopey sigh), me up to our bedroom, placed me in bed, firmly tucked me in and proceeded to stay put until I got better. The only good thing that came out of that experience was that Kai would lay behind me to keep me warm when the shivers returned.

Makes you want to run over here and steal him, doesn't it? Aww…Touch him and die.

"Let's go."

Speaking of my doting boyfriend, here he comes now. Though we spend all of our time together, besides during breakfast or on the days when I am in no mood to be in the company of his best friends/my worst enemies, Kai always seems to be busy. With what I have no idea. Family and work related, most likely. I once asked him about it. He began to explain it and I was forced to stop him because my head had begun to hurt from all the information, terms and calculations. I told you, I'm a simple neko-jin from a simple village where we use leaves to predict the weather and where the social structure of the Middle Ages still prevails. It took me days to figure out how to operate the DVD player here. It didn't help that the instructions were Russian Only.

"Kai, I'm thinking about switching to Christianity."

"Which denomination?" he asks, wrapping his trademark scarf around his neck.

"Denomination?" I parrot. Already this is sounding complicated.

"Catholicism, Protestantism, Eastern Orthodox…?"

"Um…Catholicism, I guess."

"You shouldn't just take a random guess and pick one."

"That's not the reason. You're catholic."

"Am not."

Say what? Have I been dating a heathen all this time? I might idolize him and treat him as a god, but surely he must believe that there is a being of even greater power than him out there?

"I belong to the Eastern Orthodox, like the majority of Russia," he elaborates, handing me my gloves and pulling on his. "And why do you want to convert?"

"I'm no longer an accepted member in my religion," I remind dully, shrugging on my coat. "People like me should be wiped off the face of the earth, or at exiled to the deepest jungles, according to our belief back in the village. I'm not allowed to follow it anymore, actually. And…I feel strange without having something to believe in. People change religions all the time; it's challenging and scary, but I need some sort of guideline now."

He studies me in another one of his scrutinizing moments. Red eyes bore into mine and I shift, feeling like a toddler who has been caught with his hand in the cookie jar or in trouble for saying a bad word. Is it that strange a choice? This isn't the first time I've notice how different we are due to our backgrounds and environment. Right now the only thing that matters to me is being with him, but sooner or later we both know that we will get snagged on complications because of our beliefs and sense of morals. Life is tough enough without being obstructed by a religious conviction that doesn't even acknowledge me because of my sexuality. I'm aware that homosexuality isn't welcomed with open arms in Christianity, but at least here in the western, modern world they don't burn 'sinners' at the stakes in the middle of the community or leave them tied up and helpless in the forest for wild animals to rip them from limb to limb.

"It's your decision to make," Kai finally states, ushering me towards the door. "However…"

"However?"

He smirks and gives me a small nip on my ear, making me jump in his arms as we stand in the open doorway, our car waiting for us right at the bottom of the stairs.

"If you do it you will be expected to participate in everything, including Epiphany, and not pass out."

I've said this before, I'll say it again: This guy is a freakin' psychic.

I pinch him.

"I know," I reply bravely. "But I did pretty well last time for a new coming, none-Christian."

"You didn't die," he acknowledges.

"That has got to count for something."

"Whatever."

Gripping his arm as I wait for him to close and lock the front door behind us, I let the subject drift into the background for now. I'm in no hurry to make the leap into a whole knew religion. Not to denote or disrespect Christianity in any way, but I have bigger, more urgent things to chew over, namely the much feared lunch visit from Voltaire, my unknowing and no doubt unwilling grandfather-in-law. I try to assure myself the same way I did this morning in the bedroom but hours have past since then, meaning that I'm now hours closer to facing him, and I can feel the inevitable bubbling of anxiety beginning to brew.

"So what are we going to do?" I ask in an effort to forget my nervousness.

"Don't know, actually."

"The point being…"

"Tala called me this morning."

"Fight?"

"Yeah."

"Level?"

"2. Will most likely develop into a Level 3 by late this afternoon."

"…You know, I've always wanted to visit the Winter Palace in Saint Petersburg. How about it?"

He scoffs at the suggestion as we near the shiny black Mercedes. Sighing, I resign myself to another afternoon brawl between a wolf, a falcon and many parts of our house. My day just keeps getting better and better…

"…We'll take the jet."

I smirk, unable to stop myself, and push him up against the car for a grateful kiss, which he returns passionately, clutching his scarf to prevent him from pulling away until I'm done. Dear Buddha (or God, should I make up my mind), I love him so much. Am I wrong to love him, just because he's also a male? Nothing and no one can convince me that our relationship is wrong. It cannot be. It's too pure and deep to be abnormal.

So then why do images of a disapproving face scowl at me? Voltaire's face…

I pull away. He gives me a puzzled look.

"I'm scared, Kai," I whisper, catching him off guard, "of what your grandfather will say."

Kai pauses…and does not answer.

And I know that, deep down, he's scared too.

Tbc…


A/N: You've noticed that this isn't as lighthearted as Our First Noel. This will remain a humor fic, but since I want to explore this incarnation of the KaixRay relationship unavoidable subjects and situation will come into play.

Note, this story is different from the others since this is the first time that I am not treating yaoi as if it's an everyday thing. In my other previous (and on-going) works the relationship between two male characters is readily accepted by the others. I purposefully did a 180 turn in this to give it a grounded reality despite the humour.

Chapter 3: Tala and Bryan reappear, but so will Voltaire…

Read & Review, please.