Knowing I can't fall back asleep, I get up and quietly tiptoe down the hall past Maston, Coral, and Pierce's room until I get to Saylor's. I knock quietly and enter, although I know he's fast asleep. He's been killing himself at the Academy these last few months, trying to prepare, since my parents informed him of his duty as the Currents' youngest son.
He took it like a man. I admire him for that. But there were nights when I could hear him crying in his room. And those were the times I never once forgot why I was volunteering, why I was willingly giving up my own life. I was a dead man walking. But Saylor would live. Find some kind of purpose here. And he'd never be able to volunteer. Not after one of his siblings already got the chance – the district would never allow it, no matter how much money my parents paid them off. Too many in line.
I sit down on the edge of his bed. The Choosing was today. Where we'd all meet in the Grand Hall, and the Academy officials would announce what boy and girl would be eligible to volunteer for the Games. They had to put in this event because in the beginning, there were tons of fights over who would volunteer at the Reaping. So the Choosing happens a week before and designates who the volunteers will be.
Saylor wakes up in my presence. "What's wrong, Vail?" he asks immediately. Always thinking of me even though he thinks he's going to be sent off to die in seven days.
"Nothing. Just couldn't sleep."
Saylor stays silent, sensing I must want to talk about something since I woke him up at 3 in the morning.
"The Choosing is today," I tell him.
Saylor breathes out. "Like I would forget…"
"I know you never would, but…just keep calm. Saylor, it is absolutely essential that you walk up there like you're proud to volunteer. That you were chosen cause you're the best."
"But I wasn't chosen cause I'm the best. Mom and Dad paid them a lot of money," Saylor says frowning.
"I know, I know. But you have to pretend. Just for a little while longer, okay? You have to make it seem like you want to go in."
"Okay…but what's the point."
"The point is, you have to show them you're better than their Games."
Saylor's brow crinkled and I felt like pouring out the words to him. That he didn't have to worry. That he would never go into the Games. That the nightmares that woke him up screaming at night like they did me would never happen to him in real life. But I couldn't. Not yet. He would try to stop me. Maybe even tell my parents. And I couldn't let that happen.
"I'm scared, Vail."
"Stop that," I warn him. "I know you are. But I don't want you to worry."
"How can I not? I know I'm as good as dead in a couple weeks. I don't even get the point of living. I'm just going to die."
"Why don't you take today off the Academy? You've been working so hard. You're so tired."
"Maybe I'm tired because someone wakes me up in the middle of the night," he says, grinning.
I ruffle his hair and rise. "I think I'll go back to sleep. Thanks for talking to me. I have the Academy in a few hours."
"Why are you even going? Ever since you got set up with that Fisher guy, you don't have to train for the Games anymore. Or for anything else," he says with a hint of wistfulness and jealousy.
"I love you, Saylor. Please don't worry. Everything will be okay."
Saylor settles back into bed. "I think I will take today off. It's the day of the Choosing and everything. Can we go sailing tonight?"
I smile. "We sure can."
I don't have much time left with anyone in District 4. So I might as well spend as much time as possible with Saylor.
~
That afternoon, the Choosing happened. Most of District 4 gathered in the Grand Hall. The President of the Academy, Castor Clearwater, announced there was many competitive candidates for tribute. But only two could volunteer.
He named Marina Banks first, the chosen female tribute of district 4. The girl I have to convince to give up the opportunity to volunteer so I can.
She strode to the front of the hall, waved at everyone in District as they clapped and cheered, and accepted her Choosing Charm – a pearl from an oyster on a silver necklace. It would be her – my – good luck token from District 4 in the Games.
Then, he called Saylor. Although several people looked apprehensive at Saylor's twelve-year old frame, no one was surprised. With the districts in revolt, it was expected for the Current family to make a big move. And this was it.
Saylor did just as I instructed. Held his head high. Smiled at the crowd. Everyone would think he was so brave for doing this. Including my parents. So that when I volunteered at the Choosing, it would make me look like I didn't want my sibling to steal my glory and Saylor would be helpless to do anything. He would never be called a coward. He would continue on with his life in District 4 and find his passion. That's my wish for him.
Saylor was given a token, too – a seashell.
I excuse myself at the end of the ceremony to the washroom. But instead, I seek out Marina. She is celebrating with her family. I walk right up to her and give her a hug of congratulations. I know her from the Academy. She really is the best – fierce, focused, strong. She is a whiz with knives and never misses with her spear.
"Thank you, Vail," Marina tells me graciously. "Maybe you can volunteer next year!"
"Actually, I need to talk to you about that," I say quietly.
"You want pointers? You're so cute. When I return from the Games, we can…" And then she trails off, realizing that my younger brother is also entering the Games. And if she returns, he won't be. She looks embarrassed, and I grab her wrist.
"Come with me," I tell her. And she doesn't dare question why.
She slips away from her family and follows me outside. I lead her around back. "I'd be more nervous right now if I didn't know I could kick your ass," she announces.
"Ha, ha," I say back. "Listen. I know you don't know me very well, but…"
Marina scoffs. "Please. I know who you are. You're a Current. And I know what you want. You want me to promise to look after Saylor, don't you? You want your brother to come home, I get it. But, sorry, sister—"
"Actually, I want something else from you."
She looks surprised. "What?"
"I need you to not enter the Games."
She starts laughing. Then harder. "And why not, Vail? Me not entering isn't going to save your poor brother."
"I want to volunteer instead."
This shuts her up. "You can't. Your brother is going in. Why would you want to—"
"Because if I enter, then he doesn't."
Realization pours over her face. "Well, wow. I didn't expect this much compassion from a Current. I'm really shocked. But I'm sorry, Vail. I can't help you. I need to win these Games. My family's counting on me. I win, and my family is as rich as yours. And as honored. And we can all agree that in these times, it's essential."
"I'm not asking you to do it for nothing. I have something you want."
She waits a moment. "You're not going to give me what I think you are."
"Yes. I am. Fisher's hand in marriage. You wouldn't have to enter the Games for riches or status. Your family would never have to worry ever again."
"Vail, you would do that—"
"To save my brother, yes."
"Is Fisher…okay with this? I mean, he seemed pretty thrilled when you guys got fixed up."
"Please. He soon figured out that my parents were the matchmakers. He could care less about me. And you're pretty enough."
"Not as pretty as you," she says suspiciously.
I roll my eyes. "Thanks. But I'm entering the Games, Marina. I need your token. Are you in or out?"
She waits a few seconds, but it's obvious she's seriously hot for Fisher like my sister is. Yeah, she'll have to explain to her family that she won't be volunteering for the Games, but then she can announce she's marrying the richest guy in town. Who has serious connections with the Capitol. I'm doing her a favor. She doesn't have to kill a bunch of kids to get what I'm handing her on a silver platter. She'd be a fool to refuse.
"I'm in." And she hands me the pearl necklace.
The necklace is pretty, but I feel like it's my one-way, nonrefundable ticket to death.
