A/N: You guys rock my socks off. Really. Thank you so much for the reviews. You're all so rad.
Disclaimer: Don't own, not even acting like I own. Wish I did, though.
Black Pearl
by Begonias
The day Sodapop comes back is a day to remember.
Sodapop's leaner and more muscular than he was before he left—it's something they he can see immediately. His eyes are darker, his face is more worn, but besides that, he's still Sodapop.
And he's got his demons, though Soda tries not to acknowledge them. Tries not to acknowledge the fact that he killed people; some innocent, some just there because—like him—were ordered to.
He steps off the plane and looks for his family, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.
He sees his kid brother first. He's tall now, taller than him; maybe even Darry. Definitely skinnier, too. He flies through the airport like the track star he is and flings himself into Soda's embrace.
And Soda melts. God, it feels so good to see the kid that many nights in the jungle he thought he'd never see again.
And when Ponyboy pulls him back, he is crying. He looks at Soda in a way that almost scares him—that horrible mixture of love and fear, as though he's afraid Sodapop will disappear again, will just blow away in the breeze and leave him behind.
But Soda would never do that—could never do that to the people he loves most in life.
"I missed you so much," Ponyboy cries.
"God, kid, you have no idea," Soda says to him, noticing that his little brother's eyes are almost as haunted looking as his own are. "I missed you so much."
Ponyboy's green eyes roam around Soda's face as though it's a coveted thing, like he feels as though that if he doesn't stop staring at him he'll be gone; will leave him again.
No one has ever made him feel as significant as Ponyboy has. No one has ever made him feel so special. Only Ponyboy can make such a useless greaser/soldier feel so goddamn good about himself. Because he's always the one to confide to; ever the understanding. Hell, his letters to Pony might have even been more in-depth than to Darry's because Pony deserves to know the truth.
Soda's throat constricts as he pulls Ponyboy back in, rubbing his back and wincing at the protruding spine. "Glory, Ponyboy, don't Darry feed you?" He says it lightly, willing his voice not to break.
Pony laughs, a gaspy breath that sounds more wet than happy. "Oh, thank God," Pony's saying. He smiles. "Thank God."
Sodapop smiles, too, because glory—Pony's here, he's tangible, and Two-Bit and Darry are rounding the corner now. He's never felt so good.
Darry grabs him next, roughly, but Soda's almost glad about that because Darry's always been rough without meaning to be, and he's just glad that some things haven't changed.
"You're stranglin' me, Dar," Soda says, and Darry just seems to wither with relief. Relief that he's still so...Soda.
"Sorry," Darry replies, and his voice is breathy like he's on the verge of tears, which he probably is. "You have no idea, Soda...oh, man. I missed you."
"I missed you too, Darry." He's smiling through the tears; he's so happy to be back and can't wait to be home. 'Cause really, there's no place like home.
He breaks out of Darry's grasp and then Two-Bit's standing next to him.
"Come on, man!" Two-Bit laughs. "Bring it in!"
Sodapop laughs along with Two-Bit. They hug, and Two-Bit's cackling in his ear like a loon.
"Man, we should have a party!" he says.
"Yeah," Soda says. But there's something missing. "Where's Steve at? Why ain't he here? He's okay, ain't he?" He knows that Steve got back a few weeks ago, but hasn't heard anything about it since.
Two-Bit and Darry are hesitant. Ponyboy just stands there, unblinking.
"Uh, Darry?" Soda stands there sheepishly, just like that time he got caught lifting a hubcap off their neighbor's car, and when his mother's glare was staring him down. His mother always made him confess the truth, and she didn't even have to say anything.
Darry stands at the door, his shoulders tense, his body language showing how much he's aged too quickly over the years. Man, it's a shit life.
"Did you find him? Is he okay?" Darry asks hurriedly. He's already rushing to Pony's bedroom.
"Uh, Darry...I wouldn't, uh...go in there..."
"Why not?"
"He's...Well, he's just really tired right now."
Darry's voice conveys disbelief. "Tired?" he questions.
Soda nods. "Tired."
"He's not drunk, is he?"
Oh, God, Soda wishes he was. It would be just so much easier to deal with. Darry would lecture him a little and maybe ground him even at seventeen and then all would be forgiven. It happened to Pony at thirteen and it would probably happen again.
It's just so much worse. He doesn't even know what could happen if Darry finds out.
But Soda nods anyway. "He's...pretty out of it. I found him at..." Jesus, he's never been a good liar. That's always been Pony. "I found him at this party at some girl's house. I talked to some kids at the park saying they saw him there."
"You saw him at a party?"
He wishes Darry would stop giving him the third degree because he doesn't do real well under interrogation.
"Yep." He hates to lie, but he doesn't see another option. "Maybe we should just wait until the morning."
Darry nods. It'll have to do for now.
"Guys? What's up with Steve?"
Ponyboy's voice breaks the silence—it's quiet, serious, just like it's always been. "Just tell him. He deserves to know. He'll find out soon anyway."
"Find what out?" He's getting angry now, and they're still not saying anything. "Tell me!"
He watches in horror as they all three back up in unison at the harshness in his voice. There's another thing about him that wasn't there before this fucking war. He just sometimes gets so angry at things. He can't control it, and he's afraid he'll end up lashing out at someone and ruining things forever.
"He's...well, he's real different, Soda," Ponyboy explains quietly, and he looks so sad. His eyes have dark bags under them, and Soda wonders how many sleepless nights his kid brother experienced while he was gone.
"Different..." Soda turns to face Darry, his eyes questioning. Turning back to Pony, he asks, "What do you mean, different?"
Pony's eyes flicker to Darry, looking for backup, as though he's internally saying 'help me out a little' but Darry doesn't meet his eyes. Sodapop's curiosity is spiking with that—they're different now. Soda just can't figure out how.
"I think it's drugs." Pony looks to the floor, almost as though he's ashamed. "I'm sorry, Soda."
"Sorry?" Soda snaps. "Well...what's wrong? We can fix it, right?"
"Buddy, we tried everything." Darry's voice is reassuring. Thanks for finally joining the conversation, Soda thinks bitterly, mad that they left Ponyboy to do the explaining and not even bothering trying to help him out; not even a little.
"Tried everything? What the hell does that mean?"
Pony looks like he wants to do nothing but curl up into a fetal position. Shit.
"You guys, can we not do this?" Two-Bit says. Sometimes Soda thinks Two-Bit's the most logical of them all.
"Yeah," Soda says, voice hushed. "Come on." He tries to keep the voice happy and joking again, not wanting them to know how upset he actually is about this whole situation, how much he wants to see his best friend again. He's considering going there later tonight.
Soda watches his little brother sleep.
He doesn't look any better in rest, but then again, he's been looking pretty bad these days even lucid. They've all been looking a little run down these days.
And Sodapop feels some guilt. They haven't been paying attention to Pony, and in retrospect, in seems like he's been giving silent cries of help. Like the way he's been walking around like a zombie, always seeming to be on the verge of tears. Soda should have noticed it sooner.
And if Darry has noticed, he hasn't mentioned it, hasn't tried to do anything about it. Which makes Sodapop wonder.
And moments among Pony and Darry are awkward—Soda has no idea what happened between them but he intends to find out.
"You're lucky," he whispers to the silence. "But you're gonna have to tell him sooner or later."
Soda just hopes it's later rather than sooner.
The first night back and it's a pretty good one. Darry makes his favorite food; even makes some of it blue, which makes him laugh. He forgot all about his tendency to color foods odd colors.
The house is exactly how he remembers, which he's so damn grateful to see.
And the little details make him remember. The hole in the wall where he and Dallas were roughhousing at age twelve and Dally got so mad he stabbed a pencil into the drywall.
Soda's father was mad, understandably, but Mom just laughed. She said the little things gave the house character.
The dent in the plaster from when Darry was fourteen and reclined all the way back in Dad's rocking chair and knocked in a small indentation.
Sodapop sits in one of the familiar, suddenly-more-comfortable-than-ever kitchen chairs and sighs happily. If he closes his eyes, he's a kid eating breakfast right before starting his early shift at the DX.
Darry plops a plate of food in front of Soda.
He stares at his plate; sudden warmth and happiness threatening to take over. He remembers how good it feels to have a real, delicious home-cooked meal. They were scarce in the military.
He's so engrossed in his food he doesn't notice Ponyboy's not sitting at the table.
"Come on, Ponyboy!" Darry shouts. "Dinner!"
Pony walks out, all gangly, long arms and legs taking up his frame. "I'm not that hungry," he says.
"Well, you're going to eat." Darry's voice is unreasonably strict, and makes Soda inadvertently cringe on the inside.
Pony just nods, like he's not even willing to fight back, and sits exhaustedly on the seat that resides by him.
Pony doesn't say anything. Just sits there, looking miserable, exhausted.
Looking back, that should have been some sort of clue.
Bonus A/N: Since this was originally intended to be a one-shot, the chapters will be a little shorter than if I had written everything else out beforehand. This story will be short—probably only about four or five chapters long.
Okay, seriously DO NOT assume that this is going to be some sort of Abusive!Darry story, because I can promise you, it's not. I know what direction this is going in and that's definitely not it.
Mostly, the next chapters will be about how the situation in chapter one came to be and then later the outcome of the situation.
Also, third person is an area I find difficult, so please point out any mistakes or ambiguity.
Thanks for reading and reviewing! Please leave more!
