Make it Fly

Chapter 2 - EPOV

What is and What Should Never Be

AN: I want to thank everyone that gave this story a chance! Hope you enjoy this chapter! A big thanks to JaniceeLynn and all the help she has given me! I also want to thank Project Team Beta, EvilPumpkin and LoriAnnTwiFan for their amazing work, whipping this chapter into shape. They did such a great job! Thanks!


The next day was exactly as miserable as I thought it would be.

My head was pounding, my stomach was churning, and on top of that Alec was home, cuddling on the couch with Bella. It shouldn't have bothered me; it should have made me happy to see my best friend so in love and content in her life. So, why did the image of them together make me so enraged?

If I was being honest with myself, the answer was easy. I was falling for her. But I refused to give in and let this become a complicated situation. I'd been through enough of them in the past.

I needed to get my mind off of all these stupid feelings.

At first I tried to work it off. I went down to the weight room in the basement of our apartment building. I hit the maximum weights my body could take, just pushing myself past my usual limits. None of this was helping my headache, but it was doing a good job of working off my frustrations.

After the weights I hit the treadmill and started running. When I was in my peak shape, I was able to run three miles without getting winded. Now I was lucky if I could run a mile at about 5 mph without getting tired. I needed to get myself back in shape- not because of Air Force requirements, but because I wanted to maintain a level of fitness for myself. I had to take classes about physical fitness and basic medical knowledge to be prepared for anything in the field. I knew all about the horrors of heart disease and high blood pressure. Being in top physical condition stopped me from being another statistic for the health professionals.

As soon as I stopped working out, my mind was racing right back to Bella. Wondering about all of our 'what if' moments where our almost moments happened. What if Bella and I would have gotten together before I left? What if Bella and Alec weren't together right now?

No one would ever know.

I needed to get out of my bedroom and out of the building altogether. Seeing their display was haunting me and making my mind race even more. I needed to do something.

It had been a long time since I had seen a buddy of mine from the Air Force; I hadn't talked to him since I joined the reserves almost a year ago. I jumped into my old, run-down Mustang and traveled into Queens where the recruiting station was. My friend, Jacob, had decided to go into recruiting after he finished his four-year contract.

"Edward! Long time no see!" Jacob said as he made his way towards me to give me a one-armed hug.

"Good to see you, man. How have you been?" I tried to give him my best smile, though I knew that it was a weak one.

"I've been okay, and yourself?"

"Hanging in there. I just needed to clear my head, so I thought that I would pay you a visit."

"How's that girl of yours?" he asked. He was referring to Bella.

"Taken," I said, sighing deeply, a sign of my obvious displeasure with this fact.

"Now I know why you need to clear your head."

After three years of bullshitting and taking class after class, I finally had something to show for my time in the Air Force.

Today, I was getting my bachelor's degree.

There was going to be a small ceremony where I received a diploma on stage, and then I got to see my parents, since we were allowed to invite family. I was so excited to see them; going this long without seeing or talking to them has been rough on me. I had always been a bit of a Mama's boy, though I'd never admit it out loud.

When I got onstage to accept my diploma, I was hoping to catch a glimpse of my parents in the crowd. My eyes scanned as far as they could, but I was disappointed when I couldn't see them anywhere.

Once the ceremony was over, everyone gathered at the entrance of the building waiting for their family member to come out. I tried to focus on congratulating my buddies coming up to me, but I was distracted by trying to find my family.

"Hey! Airman Cullen!" a familiar voice yelled out to me.

I didn't need to turn around to see who it was. That voice had played throughout my mind for the past three years, waiting for the moment when I finally got to hear it live and see her in person.

She took my breath away when my eyes reached her. Her hair was shorter, right around her shoulders, and she wore it straight with her bangs hanging over one eye. She was actually in a dress, a rare occurrence for the girl had known all throughout high school and beyond... but damn, she wore it well. The dress hung low on her chest and gave me a nice view of her full chest and though it wasn't a form-fighting dress, I could see that she still had the most amazing curves. She even had on a pair of heels; I didn't know she was able walk in shoes that high.

I could barely react when she leapt into my arms, throwing hers around my neck. Eventually my brain sped up, and I was able to spin around with her in my arms, holding onto her tightly. I didn't want to let her down, but she started to wiggle under my touch, signaling I could let her go.

"What are you doing here?" I finally managed to ask her.

Her giggle ran sweetly through my ears. "Like I could miss seeing you graduate! I'm so proud of you! Who would have thought that you would get your diploma before me?"

I chuckled at her. "Well, that's because you are getting a fancy diploma, and your name is going to have letters after it. Bella Swan, RN. Where are my parents?"

She flashed me a smile and turned her head. I followed her gaze until I saw my parents. My mother started to lightly run towards me, enveloping me in a hug. I was homesick, inhaling the familiar scent of my mother that filled my childhood home. I gave my father a slight hug as well. They all kept beaming and telling me how proud they were of me, Bella included. I suspected that they were all worried for a while that I would never make anything of myself but just a permanent fixture on their couch, living off their money. It was a comfort to them knowing that I always had the Air Force to keep my ass in line, and give me a job and benefits.

I was able to leave base to go to dinner with my parents and Bella. It was nice to be able to catch up and talk with them in person. My parents were doing well and were still as in love as ever. Their relationship was inspiring. They'd been together for almost 30 years and still acted like a newlywed couple. I wished that I could find a woman that I could share my life with and be as happy and as in love as my parents were after all these years.

Bella seemed as well as she had ever been. Her smile was radiant, and she was beginning her in-hospital training. It wouldn't be long until she was receiving her degree and would be a registered nurse. I would have to find a way to take my leave for the year when she was graduating. Just like she couldn't miss walk up on stage to get my diploma, I wouldn't dare miss her day either.

I couldn't tear my eyes away from her; she was absolutely stunning. I never realized how much I had really missed her until I saw her again. I couldn't imagine how I'd managed so long without having her by my side. For so many years prior to my leaving, I had seen her almost every day, and the days I didn't see her we were talking on the phone or texting. She was my best friend; I couldn't imagine what life would be like if I had never met her.

Dinner was great; it was amazing being able to loosen up and joke around with them like old times. I was relieved to see that my parents were content which the choices I made in my life. I had been nervous that they wouldn't understand my desire to potentially risk my life at some point. It was nice knowing that they would support any decision I made and find a way to be happy for me.

Though I was disappointed that my time with them was short, I was almost eager to let them go so that I could hang out with Bella. My parents had an early flight the next morning and wanted to go to their hotel to sleep and prepare. Bella's flight wasn't until later in the day, so I took her back to the base. I knew that there had to be at least one celebratory party going on in the barracks.

Sure enough, in my building, music was blasting and Airmen and their visiting friends were dancing and drinking. Within minutes of walking in, drinks were thrown in our hands. We both tossed them back, and Bella dragged me straight onto the dance floor.

There was something different about her. She was a bit more girly, definitely more relaxed and confident and, dare I say it, sexier. With her body so close to mine, our hips swaying in sync to the music, I had never wanted to be with her as badly as I did in that moment.

I was about to bring my lips down to her neck, where I knew she liked it, when a hand from behind jerked me back.

"Cullen!"

"Hey, Black. What's going on?" I said, probably a bit sharper than I meant to. Jacob Black was one of my close buddies. We endured Basic Training together and were interested in the same training areas. He was assigned to the same barracks I was, so we spent a lot of time together. He may be the closest friend I had here, but now was not the time I wanted to be talking to him.

"Enjoying my party?"

"I should have known this was your doing. But yeah, I am."

"All this time and you never mentioned a hot girlfriend. I'm hurt, man," he said, jokingly putting a hand over his heart like it was in pain.

He thought Bella was my girlfriend. I wish… "Nah, this is Bella. You remember that girl I told you about." I had often spoken about her; she was a part of most of my best memories, after all.

"Yeah, I remember. I just never remember looking that way with any of my friends."

Bella and I looked at each other. Her face seemed relaxed, almost amused. Some people might find this situation awkward, being addressed like we were a couple. Bella and I have always been so comfortable around each other; we had often been mistaken for a couple. My arms were wrapped around her waist, and there was barely enough space for air between our bodies. Before we had been interrupted, my head was near the crook of her neck, as though I was about to kiss her… which I was.

From an outside perspective, we looked like a couple.

"Guess you never had good friends," Bella teased.

"I wish I had a friend like you. Lord knows I could use a good time," Jacob replied.

Jacob turned around and left after that, leaving Bella and I to register the comments that he has made. Eventually, Bella turned around and leaned her head against my chest and we swayed to the slow song that was beginning to play.

Before we knew it, it was 2 in the morning, and I could see exhaustion written across Bella's face. Since I had been drinking, I couldn't drive her home. There was no way I would let her take a cab by herself. So, I took the ride with her.

The cab ride was quiet. Our time together was coming to a close, and her departure was thick in the air. No words would be able to make saying goodbye any easier for either of us. I had just gotten her back and now I had to let her go again.

We stood in the lobby of the hotel with our arms wrapped around one another. Bella gripped me tight as her tears dripped onto my shirt.

"I miss you, Edward."

"Ditto, Baby."

Baby?

She looked up at me, her eyes wide with sadness and her cheeks stained with running mascara. Though she might have looked like a mess to some, all I could think was how beautiful she was and how much I wanted her in that moment.

I didn't think; I just acted.

I slowly brought my lips down to hers. She was hesitant at first, probably in shock about what I was doing. But then she started to move her lips in sync with mine. I swept my tongue across her bottom lip, and she eagerly opened her mouth to me. Our tongues dashed between our mouths as we stood, making out in the lobby of her hotel.

We pulled apart for air; reluctance on my part was high. Our foreheads were pressed together as I looked down at her swollen, kissed lips and I smiled knowing it was me that had done that.

She smiled too and brought her lips to mine for a quick peck. By the time her lips had left mine and I reopened my eyes, she was already walking down the hall towards the stairs. I heard a sniffle as her heels connected with the hard tiled floor.

I ran my hand through my hair and trudged back to the cab. My mind was racing as I got back into the cab. I was confused by the events that just transpired. I was between regret and sheer bliss; it was a bittersweet goodbye for Bella and me.

My bliss was easy to explain; she was the most astounding person I knew. Why wouldn't I want to kiss her?

My regret was harder to understand. First, had I scared Bella off? Had I made her upset by doing that? Her feelings were the first thing I thought of, and I didn't want to do anything to upset her. I didn't know why she had just ran off after pulling away, and I sure as hell didn't know what that meant. I was dying to understand exactly how she was feeling.

But further than that, how the hell was I supposed to enjoy a kiss with anyone else after experiencing the most perfect kiss with Bella?

Needless to say, when I returned to the barracks that night, Jacob had plenty of questions; with my emotions hanging on my sleeve, that only brought more questions and fewer answers.

As I talked more and more with Jake, I realized that I had been pushing away a lot of feelings towards Bella. These were feelings I thought were inappropriate. By the end of a very long night, I knew that I had some serious feelings for my best friend. I vowed that I would work it out with her when I got back. I would try my hardest to have a relationship with her and make it work.

Keeping in contact with loved ones at home was difficult. With the latest technology, it was becoming easier: texting, video chatting and things like that. But my free time was limited, and during that time I wasn't exactly free. I had my own training and studying to do, not to mention that privacy was difficult to come by.

I had spoken to Bella a few times in my last year away, though we never brought up what happened that night. It seemed to hang between us but neither of us wanted to acknowledge it. We went on talking about generic things like the weather and different patients she encountered.

I was never able to arrange leave for Bella's graduation; she wasn't family. And it wasn't an emergency. I know it was a big disappointment to Bella, as it was me. I would have given anything to be there on that day. It was something I deeply regretted missing.

Once there were only two months to go in Texas, I started a countdown. On my calendar every day was marked with the remaining number of days, and I had a picture of Bella taped right next to my calendar. I was still confident in my decision to develop something more between the two of us.

Wasn't I surprised when I got back and someone had already taken my place.

"I can't figure out if I hate this guy because he's dating my girl or if there's a bigger reason."

"Maybe it's a bit of both. Have you even told her how you feel? Have you two even talked about that night?" Jake asked me.

"That would be no to both. We just kind of ignored it happened, went on like nothing had changed. And I didn't want to go digging up the past when she is clearly settled and happy, I think."

"You think? You know her better than anyone else from what you have told me. Is she happy or not?"

"I don't know. When she's with him, she looks happy. But he is an 'important' doctor at their hospital, "I said, putting up finger quotes "He puts in like 80 hour weeks being on call constantly. It puts a toll on their relationship. Plus, she came with me to the club last night, and she was like checking out what other guys were there. I don't know what to think, man."

"It seems to me like she's confused at the very least. You need to talk to her. Take your chance; otherwise, you'll never know what you could have had."

I nodded my head at him, taking his advice to heart.

We continued to chat for a while longer, mostly about the Air Force and different things that were going on for him. He informed me that he was going into officer school soon. This way, he could make a little bit more money and go into something other than recruiting, like flying. We were both interested in the same things that the Air Force had to offer.

He told me to consider it; if things with Bella weren't going like I wanted I could always chase a new dream, like becoming a pilot. He gave me all the information and told me to at least think about it.

Officer training was in Alabama, and it lasted twelve weeks. Twelve weeks of grueling physical and mental training that I would need to apply for pilot school. Then pilot school was another ten month program. It would be a lot of time away from my friends and family, again. But what real ties did I have to the life I was living in the city?

My parents had each other, plus they lived out on the Island. I didn't see them that often as it was. They would want me to do what I wanted and would be proud to see me doing something with the Air Force and for my country.

My friends all had their respective partners. Rose had Emmett, and Alice had Jasper. Hell, Bella had Alec. I would always be the seventh wheel in my group of friends.

The bar paid the bills, but it wasn't my life's calling. It was just a means to get by. I had nothing holding me to it.

In fact, I had nothing holding me to anything in the city.

Maybe officer school was the way to go…

After my trip to see Jake, I went back into the city and to the apartment.

I was hoping that at the very least Alec wouldn't be there, but I couldn't catch a break.

"Hey," I said, to be polite, when I walked in.

As I was taking my shoes off, I heard Alec coming closer to me.

"Thank God you're home. Bella is in our room crying, and I don't know what to do. I keep trying to talk to her but she won't let me in."

I rolled my eyes once I was out of his view. Guy had been dating her for over a year and didn't know how to console her when she cried, or even figure out what's wrong.

I knocked on the door, and through her sniffles she asked who it was, and I let her know it was me. I immediately heard her feet hit the floor, and the door opened to reveal my girl with a very red, puffy face. She had been crying for a while.

She ushered me in and closed the door in Alec's face before he could even get a word in.

"What's wrong, B? You know Alec is out there…" I started to say.

"I don't know what's wrong with me. I just can't stop crying. I don't want to see Alec, or have him see me like this. I just don't know." she sobbed.

Bella had been diagnosed as depressed at the beginning of college. She had been on anti-depressants ever since. She didn't need to see a therapist; her regular doctor kept tabs on her mental health and kept her medication refilled. Most days you couldn't even tell. The medication kept her functioning and her negative thoughts away. Other days, like today, she just lost it. Sometimes it had a trigger, other times not.

"Have you been taking your medicine?"

"Yeah. Every day. I think after five years, I would remember."

"I'm just checking. Does Alec even know?"

She shook her head.

"Why haven't you told him? Plus, isn't he a doctor? Shouldn't he be able to tell these things?"

"He's a surgeon, and yes, he could diagnose it if it was obvious. I keep my medication in my drawer, and besides, I'm fine most days. I haven't had a stretch of bad days since we have been together. If I have a bad day, he just assumes it's hormonal. As far as not telling him, can you really blame me? Like a guy really wants a girl with so much baggage! When was I supposed to fit that in? I'm 25, I'm a nurse, and oh yeah, I take anti-depressants so that I can function like a normal person!"

"Bella… we've been through this for years. It's not something you can control. You wouldn't be so hesitant to share with him if it was diabetes. This is the same thing."

"You sound like my freaking doctor."

"That's because I know you better, and I've also been doing this with you for just as long. Now back to today. What happened?"

"I don't know. Last night, I was perfectly fine. Then, this morning I didn't want to get out of bed, and I didn't want to eat. And then the tears started."

"What's going on in that mind of yours? Are you cycling?" Bella often cycled around in her head; she would let one negative thought spiral into several. Constant worries and bad memories played on loop inside her mind, creating anxiety and her upset mood.

"No, Doctor. I just didn't sleep well last night."

"Okay, well that's probably it right there. You know sleep is important. Why couldn't you sleep well?"

"No one was home. Alec got called back to the hospital, and then you were at that girl's house. I guess I didn't like being alone."

"I'm sorry, B. If I would have known that Alec was going back to the hospital, I wouldn't have left you alone."

"You left me alone for 4 years, what's one more night?"

Ouch. "Bella…"

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. That was out of line. Here you are trying to help, and I go and open my big mouth."

"Was it hard?" I asked her. We never talked about it, the time I was gone. It was wrong, but I never thought about how much my leaving affected her mental state. I guess I never figured that she needed me that much with Rose around.

She nodded her head.

"Why didn't you ever tell me?"

"Because you were out doing the right thing. You were out trying to make yourself a better person while doing something for your country. I was one person, with other people here around me. You left everything you knew behind. I didn't have the right to burden you. I thought I was being selfish, wanting you around so much."

"You're not a burden to me. Not then, not now, and not ever. I would have wanted you to tell me. I didn't want to leave you, especially if you were feeling low. Those were never my intentions."

"I know that. That's why I never said anything. But I've always needed you. You've always been my rock, more than Rose, more than anyone," she said, shrugging her shoulders before exhaling a deep breath.

"I'm here now, and I'm not going anywhere," I told her while pulling her into my arms. She wrapped her thin arms around my waist and squeezed the hell out of me. I ran my fingers through her hair and then kissed the top of her head. "Now, go shower and get dressed. You'll feel better."

She mustered up a small smile, and I left her to gather her things for her shower.

We walked out together, and Alec went straight to Bella. She waved him off, gave him a slight smile and went to the bathroom.

"What happened?" Alec asked once she started the shower up.

"PMS," I lied. It was an easy answer that left no questions. Guys never questioned that shit.

"Shit. I thought I did something wrong. She's never been like this before. I mean sure, she's cried before, but there's always been a reason. Guess I still have some things to learn about her."

I just shrugged my shoulders and went into my room. Carrying on a conversation with Alec was just about the last thing I wanted to do at this point.

My mind was racing again from my conversation with Bella. I felt horrible for not realizing the effect my absence had on her. I should have known that it would have been hard on her. Though my free time was severely limited, I couldn't help but feel like I should have made more time to contact her and check up on how she was feeling.

I got my basketball from the corner of my room and starting to toss it up in the air, practicing my release point for taking a shot. I had always loved playing; I played a bit in the beginning of my career in the Air Force. But I hadn't played in a long time. It was just a hobby, and it gave my mind something else to focus on.

My phone started buzzing on the bed, and I couldn't think who would be texting me.

Hey man, just wondering how that blonde was. What are you doing tonight? I got Ranger tickets. You, me, Jasper and B? She's already in. Let me know ASAP- Em.

Hey, uh yeah. Sounds great. We'll meet you at the garden around 6?

Sounds good to me. See you there- Em

That left me with two hours until we had to be there. I set my alarm for 5:15pm, closed my eyes and let sleep take over.

By 5, someone was jumping on my bed, yelling my name. I opened my eyes one at a time, delighted by what I saw. Maybe I was still dreaming.

Bella had one leg on either side of me and was jumping up and down, accentuating her lovely bouncing parts. She was in a pair of skinny jeans and an oversized Rangers jersey, #17 Dubinsky. She had her little temporary tattoo Rangers symbol on her cheek, and her hair was up in a pony being held together with a Ranger scrunchie. This was typical game night attire for her.

I couldn't help but laugh at her excitement. Two hours ago, she couldn't stop the tears. Now, a shower and a promise of a Rangers game later, she was like an entirely different person. That was Bella though, one low to one high.

"Come on, come on, come on! Get dressed! We have to be there in forty-five minutes!" she exclaimed as she jumped up high and then bounced onto the bed, practically on top of me.

"Okay, okay. Lemme grab a jersey."

She was already hopping up and in my closet before I had the chance to rub the sleep out of my eyes. A sea of blue, red and white flooded my face as she threw my jersey at me. I tugged the Callahan jersey on over my head and slipped on the shoes that had been thrown at my feet as well.

"Ready?" she asked.

"B, it takes like ten minutes to get there," I reminded her.

We lived on 23rd Street by Park Avenue. The Garden was on 34th street and 7th avenue. So it was 5 avenues over and eleven blocks up. It was a quicker walk than it seemed. Not even worth the $2.25 subway fare it would take to ride the train one stop or take the bus a few stops.

"I want to get there early. I want to pretend like we're newbies, ya know? Grab the program, buy some new gear, maybe even get a foam finger and then scream at all the guys when they come out for their practice skate!"

"That sounds pathetic. But what you want, you get. So, let's go. I guess I could use a new shirt. Let's go get Jasper."

"Yay!" Bella shouted as she ran out the door, and I could hear her in the hallway banging on Jasper's door. The units we lived in had thin walls; sometimes we could carry on a conversation without leaving our own apartment.

I wondered idly where Alec was, but I didn't allow my thoughts to linger there for long because I truly didn't care. I was laughing out loud at Bella's excitement as I locked the door behind me.

We got to the Garden a half hour before Emmett was going to show up with the tickets, so Bella couldn't start her 'first time experience' yet. She called him every two minutes until he agreed to take a cab to get there earlier. It didn't matter all that much though. You weren't allowed into the actual arena until an hour before the game was scheduled to start.

By six on the dot when they opened the gates, Bella, Em, Jasper and I were the first ones through. Em got us the tickets so they were probably the best seats I would probably ever sit in. When I bought tickets, I normally sat all the way up and was just happy to be at the game and enjoy the excitement. Plus, for the most part, the more passionate fans were up there. Tonight, we were sitting the row right behind where the Rangers sat, on the edge of where they came out. This meant we had a chance to get a puck, glove or stick, not to mention, get to shake their hands. Even though we would be sitting with boring corporation white-collar workers in suits, I couldn't help but be excited to be so close to the action.

Of course, it was a rivalry game; the Rangers were playing their nemeses the Devils. They needed to win in order to be on top of the Eastern Conference, even though there was still a long way to go until playoffs. The atmosphere was insane, and people were on the edge of their seats all night. The Rangers were down by a goal with five on the clock, and then they tied it up.

With thirty seconds left in the game, the Rangers were charging down the ice to the opposition zone. The Rangers kept shooting the puck towards the net, and nothing was going in. But then off a rebound, you heard the sirens go off, signaling a goal, and the whole place erupted. 40,000 fans began singing the goal song and screaming their heads off as the clock went down to zero. The Rangers had won.

At the end of every home win, the three stars of the game were announced, and they threw a game-used glove, stick or puck into the stands. We were lucky enough to grab a glove and stick from the number one star that scored the winning goal, Ryan Callahan. Then another blue shirt tradition, we got to see the Rangers put their sticks in the air, saluting the fans in the crowd.

As we were walking out of the Garden, the buzz was still all around us.

"Gooooallll, Goooaaalllll, Gooooaalllll. Hey! Hey! Hey, hey, hey!" we all sang as we walked down 34th street with a few hundred other Ranger fans leaving the same way we were.

Once we were a few blocks away from the mayhem, we stopped to go our separate ways. Emmett lived uptown and was sharing a cab with Jasper, who was going to help Alice close up her shop for the night.

That left Bella and I to walk home in the January chill.

"So, Alec wasn't there when we left…" I mentioned to her as we walked along Madison Avenue.

"Yeah, he, uh, went back to the hospital," she said hesitantly.

"Something happen while I was asleep?"

"Kind of," she said. I waited for her to elaborate, but she didn't. So, I stopped walking and just stared at her until she continued with what happened. "He asked me to marry him, and I said I wasn't ready."

"Whoa. You can't just spring that on me and pretend like it's nothing. What did he say?"

"He wanted to know when I would be ready, and I said I didn't know. I just know that I'm not ready now. He is not at the place in his life where he can commit to a marriage. I don't want to be waiting at home every night, dinner getting cold because he's stuck at work. I'm tired of having to go to functions alone. It's frustrating. I couldn't say yes to him with all these thoughts bouncing around in my head," she explained.

"So if you feel this way, why are you with him?"

"Because I love him, Edward."

"But you're clearly not happy," I pushed.

"I never said I wasn't happy. I said I was frustrated with the way things were going. It's just because he's a fifth year; he's fighting to get the best surgeries and make the best cases. Next year is when he gets offers for fellowships to possibly become an attending at a better hospital. He needs to make the best impression. I can't fault him for being determined to make a good life-start-career for himself. Things are tough now, but it won't always be like that."

"But what if they are? What if this is who he is? Maybe his work is his marriage, and you're like the mistress. How do you know that even when he gets his offers that things are going to settle down and he will make time for you?"

"I just do. I have faith, Edward. I have faith that he loves me and will make certain sacrifices later on to make things with us work. He's not the only one working long hours. I know how hectic life in the medical profession can be, so I can understand and appreciate the time and effort he needs to put in to become the best at what he does."

"But you don't know for sure. You have your doubts, I can tell, rightfully so. Maybe he isn't the one for you."

By this time, we were at our door. She stared at me, tears gathering in the corners of her eyes. But she didn't say a word. She just slid the key into the door and walked inside, straight to her room. I contemplated walking after her and forcing her to hash this out with me. Fighting with her about it wouldn't make the situation change. That would just make her more stubborn and make rash decisions.

I might have closed my door a little harder than necessary, but my head was a wreck. I never saw this coming; I knew that they were close and had a good relationship, but marriage was a big step. It was an especially big step to take when, like Bella said, he was preparing for a huge crossroads in his career.

Where did this come from anyway? What reasons did he have for wanting to get married now?

It all seemed to hit me like a train.

One day she was my best friend, my roommate with so many possibilities. The future was still open. Next, she was almost someone's fiancée.

Maybe she and I would never get together. Maybe any hope of a relationship between us was doomed due to our friendship beforehand. I couldn't tell what the future would hold as far as Bella and I went. But what I did know was that Alec and Bella were not meant to be. Furthermore, he could never make her truly happy. She was settling for someone that she was hoping would become the person she wanted him to be, when he would never.

Regardless of what I thought, she wasn't going to listen to me. She was stubborn in that sense. She needed to be burned by the fire before she believed it was hot. So, I had to step back and let her make her own mistakes.

Due to that, my time in this apartment was dwindling down to none. She wanted to be more serious, and he wanted marriage. There was no way in hell that I was going to be welcomed much longer. Bella had said in the beginning that she got Alec to agree because it was going to be temporary. That was almost a year ago.

I was going to have to find someplace else to go.

Maybe that place was a bunk in the barracks in Alabama, training to become an officer.


AN: I hope that you enjoyed this chapter and that you will continue to keep track of the story!

I really appreciate every reader and I cant wait to see any reviews or comments you might have!

Happy Reading and please comment!

BTW! I'm having this story Beta'd now. The next chapter is being looked at now, so soon there will be new chapters being posted!