I don't own Twilight or "I'm Too Sexy"
Emmett
I hate it when Jasper is not careful. Why, you ask? Because he spends most of his time with Alice, and most of his power controlling Alice's hyper-active emotions. So, when he doesn't concentrate, he and everybody else in this god-forsaken house turns into squirrels on crack. Right now I'm in my room, looking into the mirror that takes up the whole east wall. I was listening to my iPod while lifting weights, but Jasper's lack of control has sent me into a sea of happy. My iPod blared one of my favorite songs, triggering me to dance and sing.
I'm too sexy for my love
Too sexy for my love
Love's going to leave me
I threw the weight down, and started to model for myself in the mirror.
I'm too sexy for my shirt
Too sexy for my shirt
So sexy it hurts
With that, I ripped off my black muscle shirt.
And I'm too sexy for Mylan
Too sexy for Mylan, New York and Japan
Damn straight. No one was as sexy as Emmett Cullen!! Oh shit, Rose just walked in. Eh, why not push her buttons a little.
And I'm too sexy for your body
Too sexy for you body
The way I'm disco dancing
I sang doing the "John Travolta"
I'm a model, you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
On the catwalk, on the catwalk, yeah
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
I grabbed a coat, and modeled alongside the mirror again.
I'm too sexy for my car
Too sexy for my car
Too sexy by far
Rose looked terrified, amused, and mischievous all at the same time. I wonder what she's planning.
And I'm too sexy for my hat
Too sexy for my hat
Whatcha think about that?
Rose laughed, forgetting her evil plan and said, "What hat?"
And I'm a model, you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah,on the catwalk, on the catwalk, yeah
And I shake my little tush on the catwalk
I sang and shook my bootie for her.
I'm too sexy for my cat
Too sexy for my cat
Poor pussy, poor pussy cat
Rose was now hunched over in laughter.
And I'm too sexy for my love
Too sexy for my love
Love's going to leave me
And I'm too sexy for this song.
"Oh god, I really wish someone would have gotten that on video!" Rose laughed, wiping non-existent tears from her eyes.
"I did!" Alice called from downstairs.
Shit.
