Hey guys! Thanks for the reviews! They mean a lot! Hope you like Chapter 2!
Cats POV
So as I said, I am not really happy. I cry myself to sleep, every night. My friends would have never known if it wasn't for Robbie seeing my cuts. Then he had to go and tell all of my other friends to make them worry. Now they are all crying, so upset, I don't know what to do. I try so hard to be a fun loving person. But I can't be anymore. I feel like I am about to fall apart. Even more.
I remember the day that Robbie walked in on me...
"Robbie I have to go! I am really tired, I have that thing to do tomorrow."
"What thing?" He asked.
"You know.. That singing thing."
"You have a singing thing tomorrow? What kind of singing thing?"
"You know... The one you have to sing at." I giggled and ran away. He didn't buy my act anymore. He knew who I was really now, but he still seamed to accept me for who I am. But I was worried that it wouldn't last long. Because when he really sees what I do, when he finds me dead somewhere from a bottle of pills or my knife, he wont care anymore. He shouldn't even care now. Soon enough, he will realize this.
So I went home. Crying. I didn't want him to leave. Maybe if I leave first, then he wont be able to leave me. Not first anyways. And I cant do it with words. Ending our friendship. So I should end my
miserable life. Right now.
I opened my door, locking it behind me.
Dropping my purse, I ran into the bathroom, grabbed my knife from the bottom drawer, under my brush, and went back to my living room to sit on my couch.
I pushed the blade against my skin, it was already so full of scars, its not like it will matter if there is just a couple more.
Its not like anyone will care.
The fact of the matter is, that nothing matters anymore.
I slit open my wrist. Blood.
It flowed onto the towel that I had laying on my lap, under my arm. So that it wouldn't get anywhere.
Again.
I slit open my wrist.
"Cat?" I look up and Robbie is standing there, tears running down his face.
"I thought you said that you stopped." He said.
"Robbie.. I.." He marched up to me, taking the knife from my hand and dragging me to the bathroom, where he ran warm water over my new cuts.
"Do you do this often?" He asked me.
"Robbie..."
"Cat! Do you do this often? Have you done it, other then today, from when you said you stopped?" He yelled to me. I just nodded my head.
"When?" He tried to act calm, but you could see the pain in his eyes as he talked. I didn't mean to hurt him so bad. I didn't mean to hurt him at all. I didn't want to kill myself, not right now. So I just cut.
"That night." I said.
"Wait... the night that you said that you stopped?" I again nodded my head.
"Did you ever intend to stop cutting? Or was that all just an act?" He was super mad, you could tell by the change of tone when I told him that I cut that night.
"Robbie.."
"No cat! Why did you do it? Why did you purposely try to hurt me? You know I love you!" I looked at him in shock, he was shocked to... from himself, from my actions. He just told me that he loved me. But he could mean just as a friend... right? I mean he is like my best friend out of the group of friends, he seems to understand me a lot more then anyone else in the group. And he was the one who really tried to get me to stop cutting or to start eating , not that the others didn't try, but they didn't go to the levels that Robbie did. I don't usually feel special. But Robbie makes me feel special.
"Robbie..."
"Sorry." He quickly said.
"I love you too." I said. I didn't know if he would take it as just a friend, or if he would take it as more. Honestly I didn't care. Either one was fine, but I would rather him go with the second one.
"Well good. That means we are friends. That means that you trust me! So trust me Cat, you do not deserve this! So you, again, need to stop this nonsense and come to me. If you don't want to come to me, go to someone else! But you are stopping cutting. You are. Right now." He said to me holding me in a hug while we sat in the bathroom.
"Wait.. Cat... What about your eating?" He asked me. "Did you lie to me about that too?" I didn't answer.
"You did... didn't you." He rolled his eyes. "Wow Cat... you really are a great actress." He let go of me and started to leave the bathroom. But then I think he remembered why he was here. So he stopped in the middle of the hallway, I was following close behind to apologize.
"Cat. Will you promise me something?"
"What is it?"
"Cat... will you?"
"Well I don't know Robbie. What is it?"
"Cat! You need to promise me... promise me that no matter what is going on. You wont end your life." I looked at him in shock.
"Robbie..."
"Cat! Promise me this."
"Fine.. I promise Robbie."
"Good. Now give me all of your knifes."He strictly told me. I had one in my purse, not sharp, so I didn't use it today, but I have one in my purse. I will keep that one.
I slowly handed him my 3 pocket knifes from my bathroom.
"And Kitchen knifes." I looked at him confused.
"What about when I need to cut my meat or something?" I yelled at him.
"Cat, really. You haven't had anything healthy and nutrition filled in how long?"
No answer.
"Exactly. Give me your kitchen knifes."
"Robbie, how is this exactly going to do anything? Its not like I can't go out and get new knifes."
"True, but I am staying with you for awhile, just to make sure that you have really stopped this time."
"I never said I was going to stop Robbie."
"No.. But I did."
"So that is going to keep me from cutting?"
"Well, it should. Because if you don't..." He paused
He is so kind to me. Really. At first I kind of had a bad outlook on the whole situation with Robbie. That he was taking my knifes to be mean. But he was only try to help me.
"Get your stuff. We are going to go get you some food."
"But I am not hungry." I responded, upset.
"To bad, get your stuff." Robbie said, grabbing his keys.
I hate food.
"Robbie! This food is HORRIBLE!" I yelled at him.
"Hmm. No. No its not. You need to eat. All of it." Robbie said, chomping down on his pizza. I had a slice sitting in front of me. Tears started running down my face.
"Robbie, I reall-"
"Cat. Eat." He interrupted.
"But Robbie!" I yelled. He ignored me.
"Cat. Eat the food. We are not leaving till you do."
"What if I never finish it?"
"Then I will..." He paused.
So that is why I am here.
With you.
Got you wondering? Please Review! I really want to know if I should continue this!
I love you all!
Sierra~~
God Bless
