A\N: THERE IS FANART FOR THIS! YAY! And also, I might let you know Analesia can't really cook, while Yagari is quite good. :D
Disclaimer: I DON'T OWN ANYTHING ENJOY PLZ!
"Okay… so, how do I turn this thing on?" Analesia muttered to herself, trying to figure out how to turn the stove.
"Having trouble?" Yagari leaned back in his chair, putting his feet up on the table.
"No, I have it all under control!" Analesia snapped. "And get your feet off of the table!"
Yagari shook his head. "Nah. I'm pretty comfy right here."
Analesia muttered under her breath. "Stupid hunters."
Yagari rolled his eyes, taking a swig of his coffee and tossing her a bored look. "You know, someday Zero will be the president of the Hunter's Association. What are you going to do then? Suddenly turn on him?"
Analesia finally figured out how to turn the stove on high, and the turned the knob before turning back to the cookbook. "No, if Zero is ever in charge of that place, it would probably make a turn for the better."
"You really don't get it, do you?" Yagari asked, pulling his feet off of the table and leaning forwards in his chair. "Like not at all."
"Don't get what, Yagari?" Analesia didn't look up from the book, as she was trying to figure out if there was a specific order in which she was supposed to add the vegetables.
"Zero is just like every other hunter out there. Just like them. He hates vampires as much as all of us do, and he'll kill them on sight without thinking. In some cases, he hates them even more than I do!" Yagari shouted, standing up and pointing in the general direction of Zero's bedroom.
"So?"
Yagari stopped. "So, he's for everything you're against yet you shower him with affection and love, but you hate the rest of us. Nice." He sat back down and put his feet up on the table. "At least now I know you hate me unfairly and without reason. Thanks for that. Good to have it all cleared up."
Analesia glared at him. "You're so immature. And Zero is different because his parents were killed by vampires, his girl has been stolen by a vampire, his nemesis who has stolen said girl is a vampire, and basically he knows no vampire at all that honestly likes him! Why wouldn't he hate vampires? But what's your excuse, Yagari? Why do you hate vampires?"
Yagari was silent for a moment, staring down into his coffee cup, and then said three words that stopped Analesia cold. "They hurt Zero."
She slowly turned to him, watching as he stared intently into his coffee, almost as if he were willing it to do something, though she wasn't quite sure what that something was. Then she turned back to the stove and added salt to the broth, hoping to strengthen the flavor.
"You're adding too much." Yagari finished off his coffee, and then got up to get more from the pot.
"What?"
"You're adding to much salt. You'll kill all the other flavors. And right about now would be a good time to add the carrots. Carrots take much longer than say… potatoes or peas to cook, so you should add them in an order that will make sure it all gets done evenly." Yagari added a little cream to his coffee and tilted the cup back, taking another swig.
"Well, if you're the master chef, why don't you come over and cook this meal for Zero, hmm?" Holding out the spoon, she smirked. Then her eyes got wide as Yagari took the spoon and started stirring, watching the broth carefully. "What should I do then?" Analesia asked like, 'Hey, you took my job.'
"You can cut the carrots." Yagari motioned to the cutting board and the countertop lined with fresh produce.
"Uh, sure." Analesia pulled out a peeler and a carrot and stood over the trash can, started to peel the carrots.
"You know the skins are very healthy for you. Filled with lots of nutrients."
Analesia stuck out her tongue, but he wasn't looking. "So you just want me to wash them and chop them up?"
Yagari nodded. "Soon, too."
Analesia rolled her eyes. "Soon, too," she muttered, and she heard Yagari chuckle. Laying the carrot down on the cutting board, she started to saw into the orange veggie, when she heard laughter from the stove.
"Alright, what am I doing wrong now?" She whirled around, placing her fists on her hips and glaring at him.
Yagari sighed, letting the spoon go and stepping over towards her. He turned her around and put his arms around her, taking her hands and guiding them until they were right where he wanted.
"Okay, first of all, cut through. Don't saw through. Second of all, make sure to watch your fingers. I'm not taking care of two injured whiners. And three, put the tip of the blade down first, and then bring the back down. Front to back, front to back, just like this." He gently guided her hands, successfully chopping one carrot in even slice about a half an inch thick.
Analesia felt her face flush, but she tried to hide it and hoped her hands weren't shaking beneath his. "Uh, okay. I think I got it."
"One more thing," he said, stepping away and walking back to the stove with the chunks in his hands. "Try to make them medium thick. Zero likes chunky soup, but we don't want to kill his stomach even if he hasn't gotten sick yet. Just pick an easy size and go with it."
"Okay."
For the next thirty minutes, the two were silent. Yagari only spoke when he was correcting Analesia or telling her what he needed next. Finally, the last of the ingredients were added, and all that was left was to let it simmer for a while.
"We have about forty-five minutes or so until it's done, so I guess we should clean up." Yagari stretched, and then cracked his knuckles. He started grabbing dirty dishes and utensils and putting them in the sink.
Creeping up behind him, Analesia dropped a pile of potato skins into his hair and then tip-toed away, going to the table and grabbing his empty coffee cup. Yagari pulled the junk out of his hair and looked at it. Then he glanced at Analesia who was trying not to laugh.
"Potato peelings? Really?" Yagari asked.
"How did those get there, I wonder." Analesia held out his coffee cup. "Do you want more?"
He took his cup and nodded, watching her suspiciously. She turned around to get the waste basket, and suddenly a glob of wet celery leaves hit her on the back of her head, clinging to her hair. She stiffened up and turned around, emerald eyes practically glowing with rage. "You. Did. Not."
"You're right. I didn't. It flew there all by itself." Yagari grinned, picking up half of a tomato and tossing it up and down in his hand. "I think this can fly, too."
"Toga Yagari, I swear if you throw that at me—"
"You'll what?" Yagari raised his eyebrows at her.
"I don't know yet, but I'll think of something, and you will not like it!"
Yagari ignored her, pulling back his arm and throwing the tomato right onto the front of her dress. Analesia screamed, trying not to laugh, and picked up discarded lettuce leaves and rushing forwards, stuffing them down his shirt.
"Oh, come on!' Yagari laughed, trying to pull them out. "That's just not kosher!"
"All's fair in love and war," was Analesia's quick reply.
"Oh, really?" Yagari asked. He whirled around and grabbed the sprayer from the sink, turning back around and pulling the trigger, sending water all over her and causing her to scream again.
"Ah! Yagari! Stop! Turn it off, you jerk!" She laughed, grabbing a frying pan to defend herself. She grabbed some leftover peas and started throwing them at him, but he counter-attacked with some lima beans.
"WHAT IS GOING ON IN HERE?"
Both Analesia and Yagari stopped what they were doing and turned to the doorway. The Headmaster, Yuki, and Kaname were all standing there staring at them. Analesia slowly lowered her pan, and Yagari turned off the water and put the hose back in the sink.
"Hi, Uncle Kaien." Analesia waved.
"Hey." Yagari also waved.
"We made dinner." Analesia pointed to the stove.
"For Zero, anyways. The rest of you fend for yourselves."
Analesia glared at him.
"Are you sure it's safe to eat?" Kaien asked.
"Yeah, there's a lid on. And even if our fight had gotten in there, we were using all the leftover ingredients so… it wouldn't really matter anyways." Yagari shifted, almost nervously.
"Yeah." Analesia also shifted. "Well, I'm taking some soup to Zero now."
"And I'm going with her with a paper towel in case the soup spills because Zero is still hallucinating." Analesia grabbed a bowl of soup and Yagari grabbed a paper towel and both of them dashed out of the room. They got up to Zero's bedroom and dashed in, closing the door with a bang.
"Well, that was embarrassing."
Yagari nodded. "Yes, yes it was."
"I wonder if Zero is awake enough to eat this."
"OHMIGOSH ALIENS!" Zero shot up in bed. "HELP! THERE ARE ALIENS UP HERE! I DON'T WANT THEM TO SUCK OUT MY BRAINS AND—OH! NEVERMIND THEY BROUGHT ME SOUP!" Zero grinned, holding out his hands. "Gimme, gimme, gimme!"
The two sighed.
"You're still convinced you can handle this until he gets better?" Yagari asked.
"Bring it, cowboy."
"Why has that become my nickname?" Yagari pulled two chairs up to the bed and motioned for her to sit down.
"Because… Because it just did." Analesia sat down on one chair, and Yagari on the other. She nodded at him.
"Let's do this."
A\N: The 'cowboy' nickname was from another fanfic I did for SnowFox93. There Are Hearts At Steak. Yes, the stEAk is on purpose. :D
