Hello again and thank you for reading! Just a quick note here this time, but I would like to include a revisement on my A/N of the last chapter. Although there are some things in this story harder to understand if you haven't read the manga, not every detail of this story is 100% in line with it. I have been re-reading the manga and found a few inaccurate portrayals reflected in this fan fic, but I would just like to point out that I am aware of them and they remain intentionally.
Anyway, thank you for reading and, as always I hope you enjoy!
"So?" Kurogane leaned back against the outside wall next to me. The sun had gone down and Syaoran and Valerie were put up in their rooms for bed already. It was colder out now, but I thought the chill was refreshing; it helped to clear my head some, if nothing else.
"Always the impatient one, aren't we Kergie?"
"Just tell me what's going on," he rolled his eyes.
I sighed a little. "I'm still not entirely sure but...from what I know, Fai- that is to say the real Fai- has an alternative presence in this world. The me of this world- Yui- passed away some time ago, but Fai believes his soul still exists in this dimension, though honestly I don't see that it's very likely. When we entered this world, Fai immediately, though only briefly, sensed my presence and I his, though I'm sure he- wherever he may be- is unaware that I am not the Yui he knows as his brother."
I sighed again. "This is where things get complicated. Now that I have been acknowledged on this world, it would be irrational to just leave without collecting more data. If I tried to, there's the possibility of our two presences meeting again during transportation, in which case it is likely that one of our souls would be lost somewhere between dimensions. Also, however, I'm afraid I shouldn't come into direct contact with the Fai on this world or else I could risk some unforeseen alter in his life or even my own."
"So what do we do? We can't just stay here and hide from him forever."
"Well yes, I'm aware of that. But like I said, I'm not sure about everything just yet. Even what I told you just now if purely observational knowledge; most of it may not even really be factual. I'll need some time to gather more information and then to think of what to do next. I'll try not to waste time, but I hope Syaoran and you won't mind waiting for now?"
"Of course not," he shrugged. Sometimes I wondered why he felt such a need to remain indifferent all the time when it wasn't even really necessary. "Don't...don't try to rush out of here for our sake. We don't mind waiting around here for awhile, especially if this is something important to you."
"Thanks, Kuro-pu. I'm glad you're so tolerant with me," I smiled.
"Yeah yeah," he shrugged. "Let's go try to get some sleep, okay?"
"Right," I nodded and took one last good look at the sky, trying to see the stars through a thin layer of clouds that had followed the night over us before following him in.
"One last thing," he turned to me, the more strict look that he'd reserved now for special occasions only appearing to occupy his face. "You'll tell me about everything that happens here, right?"
It caught me off guard a little. For several years now we'd all been out of habit of keeping secrets from one another. Why he chose now to lose faith in that unspoken agreement was rather mysterious, but I couldn't blame him for wanting to renew the trust pact we'd been enjoying. "Of course. I'll keep you updated on anything new I figure out."
"Not just that. Tell me...if things get bad for you here, okay?"
I breathed a light laugh. "You really can read me well now, can't you?"
"Sometimes that's just easier than waiting around for someone to tell you things on their own."
I nodded in agreement. "Alright. I'll let you know if anything happens."
"I'll count on it," he said in the 'both a threat and a promise' tone that only Kurogane had ever mastered, as far as I was aware.
We were used to it. This was just the normal thing for us. We were so visible that they didn't bother to see us. We were so clear that they didn't bother to hear us. We were so real...that it wasn't even worth the effort to try anymore. Some people said we were alone in this way, but they weren't right. How could we be if we were already together?
Daddy left when we were four. We didn't know him very well since we were both so young, but we didn't really know anyone else well either. Still, it was sad. Everyone else was sad...so shouldn't we be too? But of course...we didn't cry like the others. We weren't like the others.
But Mommy was the most sad.
"Every time he leaves," she told us, "I'm just...afraid he won't make it back. It's silly of me, of course, but still..."
She was sick. Our mother was always sick. She couldn't even take care of us very much, but that was alright. We had our sisters for that; they were old enough and smart enough to do things. It made Mommy happy...I wished I could make Mommy happy too.
When we were five, Mommy left too. But the older ones said that this was different; she wouldn't be coming back. That time, we almost cried. Mommy was almost as close to us as we were to each other...but not quite. No one could ever be like that. They couldn't know us better than we knew ourselves.
"Rita," he said to our oldest sister. She said she would make dinner, but she just sat on the floor, crying instead.
"Would you like some help?" this time we spoke together. We did everything together. Everything always.
She looked up at us. Her face was pale with pink streaks down her cheeks and very wet. She was very upset and only glared at us for a second.
"What is wrong with you two?" her voice was different; it was devastated and angry. "Do you even care what's going on?!"
We exchanged a glance and then looked back to her. "How much should we care?"
She flinched a little and then looked down away from us. "You're so different. I'll never understand." And then she told us to leave. That happened a lot; people didn't like it if we stayed too long.
When we started school, it happened again. People didn't understand us and just wanted us to go away instead. But we still weren't alone...because we had each other to hold on to.
They tried to put us in different classes...but I think I'm the only one who couldn't do it. He was alright and could do the work they gave him, but me...I needed him. I needed him to remember what to do and how to do it. How to think and solve...sometimes even how to move. I couldn't do it on my own. We needed each other...I needed him. Always.
"That boy's lucky to have a twin," I heard the grown ups talking one day. "If it weren't for Fai, I'm afraid he wouldn't even function like a normal person. He's only half there." Those were the kinds of words Fai told me it was better not to hear.
We were the same age, be he always took care of me. He acted older to protect me. Everyone said I wouldn't be here without him. That I wasn't really good for much of anything on my own. At the time, though, I didn't see that it would matter. I had Fai to help me remember to do things. I was lucky.
I woke abruptly again and stretched my arms out under me so I was almost upright. Bad idea considering the still unstable headache that I figured wouldn't be going away anytime soon now.
"Was that..." I took a long, slow breath. "Just a dream?"
I looked around and found that it was still very early; the sun hadn't risen yet, but it shouldn't be too long now before it did. There was no way I was getting back to sleep after that, so I righted myself and stood up, sighing as it took me a moment to catch my balance. This world was having some pretty annoying effects on me, but gradually I was getting used to it.
Valerie's dog, Snoops, had apparently found himself most comfortable in with me last night and stirred groggily, doing little more than switching positions now that I was no longer there too. I smiled at the little brown creature and tried to stay quiet to not bother him any more for now. From what Valerie had said, he was pretty lazy and wouldn't want to wake up until plenty after the others.
Valerie had given me some loose pants and a long sleeved shirt to sleep in last night, though she apparently liked to keep her house fairly warm and I hadn't ended up needing the shirt at all. Still, I put it on for the sake of courtesy and quietly left the room I'd been put in, deciding to walk around the house a little to see if I could find something to keep myself occupied for a while until Valerie or the others woke up. I didn't want to make any noise or do something that might interrupt their sleep, so my options were rather limited. In the end I decided it best to step outside for a bit.
Now the shirt would really come in handy, seeing as how I was immediately bombarded by a frosty morning breeze the moment I stepped outside. I shivered while pulling the door silently shut behind me, but was overall pretty grateful for the temperature. The most part of my life was spent in a world shrouded in constant snow, so I was used to cold temperatures anyway. At times like this, in fact, it seemed like a cold breeze was what I needed to clear my head.
I took a seat on the concrete steps of the front porch and leaned back on my arms. The dizziness was starting to subside a little so I took a deep breath and decided I might just be able to focus on that dream. It almost didn't seem right to call it that; a dream; it had been so realistic. Like I was actually there- or rather here I suppose judging from the details I had made out that seemed to match those of this house. And I could almost swear that I felt Fai right there beside me again.
Without even realizing it, I revisited and analyzed that dream over and over again until the sun came up close to two hours later. The odd part was that, rather than fading slightly as the time passed or after trying to re-observe it, the dream only seemed to gather more details. The clothes all those people were wearing; the marks on the wood floor beneath me; even details like the supposedly unfamiliar faces in the background.
By the time I broke from this sort of trance, I hadn't even realized how much time had passed. But my body was almost stiff with cold and from my ankles down was completely numb from the icy dew they had rested in. Almost like I had been trapped in that memory...wait...no, it was a dream. I couldn't have remembered something that hadn't happened to me! And the Fai of this world couldn't have projected it to me from Yui's point of view. The possibility of me having picked up a real memory from someone else, whether they shared my essence or not, was very low. I would have to gather more information, but for now I would just deem it a very vivid dream.
I reestablished a few basic muscle movements to try to break up the frost that had formed in parts of my blood stream and walked around outside for a quick moment just to get myself in a slightly warmer set of circumstances before going back to the immediate heat inside.
The others were still in bed, I assumed, but that surely wouldn't be for much longer. According to a clock in the kitchen, it was now 6:45 and the house itself seemed to be beginning to wake up. An automatic coffee pot must have reached its alarm time, because it kicked on and began grounding the beans inside it. The sun was beginning to find its way inside through the white curtains in a window over the sink and birds outside began singing the world awake.
I took a seat in the kitchen and noticed a newspaper on the table that happened to be in a script I could decipher. This alone was rather peculiar, seeing as how the writing I learned originally in Seresu hadn't appeared to come up very often in our travels thus far. But seeing as how I had nothing better to do and was hopelessly curious about this world, I decided to read for awhile about the current events that really couldn't have been more irrelevant to me. But it was a way to pass the time and I had always loved reading, even if now it may be long intervals between times when there was anything I could understand.
A few minutes later, Valerie walked into the kitchen, looking only half awake. She rubbed her eyes tiredly but then seemed to jolt more awake as she saw me. "Oh! You're up!"
"Yes. I'm sorry, did I startle you?"
"No, I'm just not used to having others in the house yet I suppose. Have you been out here long?"
"Oh please don't worry about me. I'm often the first one up among my travelling companions anyway, so I don't mind a little alone time in the morning."
"If you say so," she nodded, beginning to fix herself a cup of coffee. "Would you like some? Or maybe you're ready for breakfast?"
"Please don't worry yourself; you're already being more generous than we could ever ask by letting us stay here at your home. It will only make me feel like I'm taking advantage of you if you start treating us as guests."
"I'm sorry," she laughed a little. "You're all probably used to this by now; I guess I'm just not accustomed to having others here too yet. Please tell me if there's something you'd like to do then."
"Actually, I'd love it if you let me help you with chores around the house later or something. I'm sure those other two will be anxious to go and find a temporary job or something to occupy their time, but I'm afraid I'm not in that great of condition. I'd consider myself a pretty fair chef and pretty good with domestic chores as well, so if you'll let me help out around here I would feel much better about being allowed to stay."
She smiled and sat down across from me. "Really I don't mind it, but if it would make you feel better I can give you something to do. As you probably noticed, I'm not the neatest person in the world and my cooking's certainly nothing amazing,- plus I'm afraid my job's workload has been increasing a bit these past few months- so it might be nice to have someone else helping out for awhile."
"Great!" I smiled, happy that we had established more of an equal grounds relationship, on the home front, anyway.
By about a half hour later, Valerie had showed me around the kitchen better and her and I began making breakfast. Kurogane was up soon after that and Syaoran followed shortly after him. Mokona, as usual, was still asleep but would probably be up as soon as it smelled the food. Predictably, Syaoran was already anxious to get out and do something in this new world and decided to head out after breakfast and search around for a job or way to find new information here.
"And what about you, Kuro-kun?" I asked, noticing his slight hesitation on the topic.
He seemed thoughtful still over this topic. "What if I did go with the kid? Would you really be fine here?"
"Why that's a silly question!" I tried to lighten the mood. It made me uncomfortable that he seemed at a rather lack of trust for me; it was like a painful reminder of a whole life I thought we'd moved on from. "I wouldn't strain myself or anything, of course. I'll be fine here."
"Plus Valerie can make sure everything's okay when she's here and Mokona will stay home with Fai too!" Mokona promised, hopping up on my shoulder.
"How very kind of you, Mokona," I smiled. "See? You have nothing to worry about."
Kurogane shrugged and finally seemed to lighten up a little more. "Alright. I guess we'll be off then, but take care."
"Take care yourselves," Valerie smiled. "And good luck with everything."
"Thanks. We'll see you later on," Syaoran said and the two of them headed out.
"Alright, I suppose we'll get to work now too...oh wait, I guess I didn't even tell you what I do, did I?" Valerie asked.
"I suppose not; the topic hasn't come up so far anyway." I said in a light tone.
"Oh, I'm so forgetful! I'm sorry, it must have slipped my mind. Well, I run a medicine shop here from home, though the shop part is on the other end of the house. I used to be apprenticing under the town's doctor when I was much younger, but when my other sisters had all moved away I needed to be home to take care of things here too. He was kind enough to appoint me his official pharmacist and all of the patients he sees come to me for their prescriptions to be filled. Just with the cold weather moving in I have to be stocked up and ready for the cold and flu season."
"Alright," I nodded.
"Things will be getting pretty busy soon, so I'll have to go set up shop properly. Would you be alright if I assign you a few chores for now?"
"That's fine by me," I assured her and waited as she scanned the room, seeming to grimace as she really noticed all the details.
"Goodness, I didn't even realize how messy things have been getting. Alright, I suppose if you could clean the kitchen a little that would be wonderful since you've been familiarized with it some, but like your friend said don't strain yourself."
"That's no problem at all," I smiled, glad to have something diverse to start with.
"Mokona will help to!"
"Oh how lovely of you! Thank you both so much and I'll be in my shop right down that hall if you have any problems. I'll even leave the door open if you'd like so I can hear if you need something, okay?"
"That's very kind of you. And don't worry about it; it's still you who's done all of us a favor by letting us stay here," I explained.
"Well that's no trouble at all. Alright, my shop is down that hall, so don't hesitate if you need me."
"Will do," I said and waved her away down a hall opposite the way of the rooms she'd put us in last night. Snoops trotted off behind her, now looking lively and awake, only stopping for a second to sniff and re-familiarize himself with me before heading off to the shop part as well. I smiled a little but figured not to give the dog too much attention or Mokona might get jealous.
From what I'd gathered, the house was one story high but stretched out in a long rectangular kind of shape. The kitchen was about the very middle of the house with her shop in one direction and four or five bedrooms in the other, all but hers usually unoccupied. There was a door in the kitchen that led out to the privacy fenced-in backyard, surrounded on all sides by thick hedges, and another on the opposite wall that led to what could either be classified as a large foyer or a small family room.
"Alright, Mokona, shall we start off with the dishes then?" I offered.
"Sure! Can Fai wash and Mokona dry?"
"I wouldn't have had it any other way," I smiled, handing Mokona a dish towel.
Mokona and I finished the dishes at a steady enough pace and washed the countertops while we were at it, seeing as how a lot of dish water was mysteriously splashed out of the sink at some point or another. Then there was some sweeping, which we decided to go ahead and extend that to the halls as well. Valerie came back in not long after we finished that and looked around with delight.
"Oh wow, it looks amazing! You two must be ready for a break by now."
"Break time!" Mokona cheered. "Should we bring Syaoran-kun and Kuro-pu some lunch and see how they're doing?"
"That sounds like a pretty good idea," I agreed and Valerie smiled again.
"How about I make you something to take them, since you've been working so hard already? I'll have to stay here, but if you think you two will be fine alone," she offered.
"That sounds lovely," I said.
"You can go and change into some better clothes for going out if you'd like; I wouldn't want you getting too cold in your work clothes," she suggested and I nodded. She had already picked out several outfits for each of us from the previous residents of the house so we were well set as far as that went.
Mokona came with me back to the bedroom, keeping good at its promise to stay by my side when the others were gone, and hopped up on the dresser. Apart from that and the futon against the opposite wall the room was empty, but that could only be expected. After all, Valerie had said it herself; it had been quite some time since others had lived here with her.
I changed rather quickly into a pair of jeans left out and found that they were a perfect fit. Not too surprising, honestly though; if they had been Yui's or even Fai's before now of course they would be. But still, I think it was the first clothes other than my own that I didn't need a belt or tie of some sort to keep up.
"Do you think Syaoran-kun and Kuro-pu will be surprised to see us?" Mokona fantacized.
"Probably. Do you know how to find them?" I asked, pulling off my other shirt.
"Of course! Tracking down friends is one of Mokona's 108 secret talents!"
"How very convenient," I nodded, pulling myself into a long sleeved form fitting shirt a similar light blue to the one Syaoran had been wearing. I supposed he must have fit into some of Yui and/or Fai's older clothes, which might explain the vaguely similar color scheme we had here.
"Mokona is always convenient; it's not even one of my secret talents!"
"Alright then, my convenient little friend, are we ready to go?"
"Yup! But Mokona wonders...is Fai sure he's up to this?"
"Of course I am; don't worry. I'm starting to get used to this world, even if it's only very slowly, so I'm feeling much better now than I was even just earlier."
"That's good; Mokona doesn't want Fai to be hurting because of somewhere I brought us."
"Don't blame yourself by any means, Moko-chan!" I assured, holding a hand out for Mokona to hop into. "There was no way for you to even control which world we went to, much less predict that this one wasn't the best. Besides...it's an adventure, isn't it?"
"Yeah, but Fai needs to make sure to tell us everything, kay?"
"Of course," I agreed with a smile. It was a little disappointing to think that even after all this time we'd all been travelling together, they still hadn't let go of those incidents of the past. I was a little hurt that it seemed they still didn't trust me entirely, but I suppose they were all just trying to be cautious. After all, even now I could admit that I was hesitant to burden others with my problems, though of course I'd tell them important details.
"Alright, your lunch is ready to go. Will you be able to find your way to town and everything? I could send a friend with you if you'd like to help you find those other two." Valerie offered.
"No, that won't be necessary. Mokona here is pretty confident in finding them and I'll trust that opinion," I explained, taking the food basket she held out to us.
"That's just fine. But like I told your friends last night, if you need directions I'm sure anyone around here wouldn't mind pointing you in the right direction."
"That's nice. Thank you and we'll see you soon then," I waved and we headed out the front door. "Alright, you're officially the leader, Mokona, so tell me which way."
"Mmmm...Turn right! This road leads to town where Syao-kun and Kurgie are."
"Excellent," I complimented and followed Mokona's directions until we reached the town. It was nothing big or fancy, but still a nice, quaint little place. Most of the people were at their respective jobs or shops, though a few were enjoying the sun for lunch or just wandering about running errands or such. There hadn't been that many houses between Valerie's and the town, but from here I could see several more off in another direction and I assumed that the town led into a busier section that way as well.
"Okay, we're getting closer now. I think they should be...that way!" Mokona pointed to a little pathway between two rows of shops.
"Well, let's see..." I began walking in the direction of the pathway, but didn't even get all the way there before seeing Syaoran turn the corner out to meet us about half way, waving to someone behind him.
"Alright, I'll see you later," he called behind him and then turned and noticed Mokona and I. "Oh, hey guys! I was just about to go find Kurogane for lunch; is that what you're both here for?"
"You guessed it! Fai and Mokona brought you lunch from Valerie."
"So how's it going?" I asked as he pointed us in the direction to Kurogane.
"Really pretty well. I just got out of a shop where they print the books and newspapers for this and a few other towns. Today I was just sitting in and observing, but the manager offered me a temporary job tomorrow if I'm interested."
"Wow!" Mokona mused.
"That's interesting; how do you like it?"
"Well, it's a kind of thing I haven't tried yet so I think I'll stick with it for awhile and see how it goes."
"And what about Kergie-pi?" Mokona asked.
"He's just around the corner here," Syaoran pointed to a large open door as we rounded our way onto the next street. "You can ask him yourselves if you'd like."
"Oh goody!" Mokona smiled, hopping off my shoulder and over to what I figured must be a garage door of some sort judging from the structure and size. "Kuro-bu! We brought lunch; can you come with us?"
"Hm?" Kurogane turned around from the large vehicle he was standing over and looked at the three of us. "Oh, hey guys. Step inside if you'd like; I'll be done here in a minute."
"Oh, are these your friends, Mr. Kurogane?" an older man stepped into view, wiping some grease off his hands on a towel.
"Yeah. I was going to finish up here and then take a short break with them if you don't mind."
"Nonsense! Go now; you can finish later on. My costumers are going to start complaining if their cars are fixed too fast; no one will be able to get here and pick it up soon enough!"
"Alright," Kurogane said, almost reluctantly. He wasn't one to like walking away from a job, especially if it was so close to being finished. But I suppose his friends won out against perfectionism this time, seeing as how he set down the tool he'd been using and stepped away from the machine. "Let me just wash up really quick and I'll meet you guys outside."
Not but a few minutes later, we were all regrouped and walking off to the edge of town, where Syaoran said there would be a nice place where we could sit in the sun and enjoy our lunch. After finding a spot and situating our area, there was more room for us all to talk while we ate.
"Well, I found that mechanic guy you just met standing outside his shop there looking a little overwhelmed," Kurogane explained. "He said that two of his employees had to leave suddenly to be with family a few towns over for awhile and that he was overloaded with work and understaffed to boot. I told him I didn't know much about vehicles, much less from this world, but that I'd help him out any way I could. It's actually pretty simple mechanics, so it's a good job."
"Ooh, Kergie's so talented! He can go out and do any job he wants to," Mokona mused. "When he wants to anyway."
"Oh well let's see you beat me when it comes to having a desire to work," he challenged, but Mokona just stuck its tongue out in response. "So what about you, Syaoran?"
"Well, like I told Fai-san and Mokona, I found a printing house that said they could use a little help right now. Apparently, they're getting backed up on orders and need someone to help them catch up, even if it's not a long standing position. Today they were showing me how to work all the machines and equipment properly and I'll get to give some of them a try myself later on to see how I do."
"Aw, would you just listen to our boys, Moko-chan? So smart and eager to do something!" I fawned, getting a laugh from Mokona at least, though the other two just rolled their eyes.
"Mokona and Fai have been working hard too! We cleaned the whole kitchen already and made Miss Valerie very happy," Mokona bragged.
"That's great," Syaoran said. "Just don't do too much right off."
"Of course not! And Mokona has been making sure Fai is alright too, so you have nothing to worry about!"
"That's reassuring," Kurogane said in a sarcastic tone.
"Don't be mean, Kurga-lurga! Of course Mokona is trustworthy!"
"Oh don't worry about him, Moko-chan," I reassured. "Daddy's just a brute sometime, that's all."
"Gee, thanks for sticking up for me, Mommy." Kurogane played along, rolling his eyes.
"Now now, don't fight in front of Syao-tan; you'll set a bad example," Mokona scolded and then we all laughed. It was times like this that I appreciated having them. My friends. It was only with them that I'd ever really been able to have fun. To laugh out loud and enjoy the moment. For that, I was grateful.
