Digimon Demon Wars: The Diary
Joe Kido
Ok, so here goes. I've been talking to one of my dad's colleagues who happens to be a psychiatrist, and she suggest that it might be helpful to write some of my thoughts down, so here goes.
I don't even know where to start, so I guess I'll go with that. I guess I feel a little guilty. I was away at college when the attack happened, completely safe across Tokyo from Odaiba. I didn't even know an attack was happening until it was already over, and I didn't know that Tai had, that Tai had, why is it so hard to write this?
Tai's gone. There I wrote it, and it doesn't help at all. Isn't admitting something supposed to make it better? That's what all the psychiatry books I've studied say. They always say things like admitting something is half of the battle in fixing it. Saying that has just the opposite effect, I feel even worse than before.
~000~
I'll never say that I was great friends with Tai, because honestly, we weren't. Yea we got along fine, but the age difference and even more importantly the personality difference really prevented us from being that close. That doesn't mean I'm not feeling his, his absence.
I never really realized exactly how connected I was to Tai. I mean, we never really hung out except when we were dealing with the digital world, or our group got together. We hardly saw each other at all after I left for college. I'd still get the occasional email from him, which was usually an attempt to get all of us digidestined together. I wish now that I'd taken some of those opportunities, but I never did. There was always some test I had to study for, or an assignment to take care of, so I never went.
The night before the battle in Odaiba, I got another email, inviting me again to meet up with Tai, and hopefully the other digidestined, and I just ignored it. It was the very last thing that Tai would ever say to me, and I just ignored it. It's easy looking back how unimportant it seemed. Now I knew it was the last communication Tai would ever make with me, and I'd blown it off.
I didn't really realize how much it would affect me, until I got back to my dorm room the first time after finding out what happened. The email was still opened when I got back, and honestly exactly what that email was hit me the second I glanced over it. The way it was written, dropping in a joke about my nose always being stuck in a book, and needing to get out more often, to references to my Crest spoke volumes about how much Tai actually gave a damn about all of us. I know he sent a similar email to every one of the other digidestined, trying to get all of us together, and each one was unique to each individual.
Taking the time to bring back old memories like that in an attempt to get everyone together for the first time in months was a really touching gesture on Tai's part, and really showed how much he cared for all of us.
It's too bad I couldn't have figured this out a few days earlier, when it actually would have made a difference. Now it didn't matter, at least for Tai.
~000~
I'd taken something for granted, and I wasn't going to do that anymore. I'm not just going to stay buried in my book forever, I'm going to do things with my friends, and I'm going to make the most of what I've got, before it's too late.
Goodbye Tai.
