UNLIMITED RIN WORKS

A/N well here we go another chapter ready.

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'Majikaru Rin' so do we all like it so far?

'Rin' why did you have to write suggestive themes, why?

'Majikaru Rin' because I'm the one writing the story, besides you loved it

'Rin' that's a lie!!

'Archer' really Rin I had no idea.

'Rin' you shut up you just want to see Majikaru Rin write something in here that involves me wearing a French maid uniform!

'Archer' 'pinches nose to stop stream of blood' although that does sound very, very nice, I was thinking more along the lines of bunny girl

'Rin' WHAT!?!

'Majikaru Rin' 'Takes notes'

'Archer' or even those skimpy female Santa suits, you know the really short red ones made of PVC? 'drools'

'Rin' don't look at me that way!

'Archer' 'advancing'

'Rin' stay away!!

'Majikaru Rin' 'looks up from laptop'

'Rin' hey! Don't touch me that way!!

'Majikaru Rin' O-kay, on with the story.

………………………………...

'THE WAY OF THE MINI SKIRT'

(Also called… 'Shirou's an idiot and gets stabbed by Lancer')

Emiya residence

"I have come to tell you the truth, Emiya Shirou." said Rin looking at Shirou from where she sat across the table.

"What truth?" asked Shirou.

"Saber's not blonde." Rin said.

"Lies, all lies I am a true blonde!" exclaimed Saber.

"Yeah, yeah the truth hurts, Rin go do that 'thing' with Saber you said." said Archer.

"Right, come on Saber." said Rin dragging the Servant away to a room.

"Wait Tohsaka what are you doing?" demanded Shirou.

"…Oh you'll see." said Archer.

Meanwhile in Saber's room…

"So if I dress like you I will be stronger?" asked Saber as she put on the outfit Rin had brought with her.

"Yep, and you're putting the skirt on wrong, it's shorter than that." said Rin.

"Is this right?" asked Saber know fully dressed in Rin's red turtle neck, black mini skirt and thigh highs stood so Rin could see.

"It's almost perfect, know we just need to do you're hair." said Rin hair brush in one hand and black ribbons in the other.

………………………………...

Three minutes later…

"Well my work here is done." said Rin coming out of the room.

"What did you do to Saber?" asked Shirou.

"You'll see, Saber come out." said Rin urging the Servant out.

Saber stepped out of the room and blushed. She looked just like Rin only her hair was far shorter and her eyes where a different colour and her figure not as good.

"S-Saber..?" said Shirou.

"I-It's for the magical energy, I do not enjoy dressing like this." said Saber.

"It looks great!" said Shirou and Archer.

"…?" went Saber.

"This alliance is totally worth it!" said Archer as the two gave each other the thumbs up.

They ran over to Saber and proceeded to throw her up in the air catching her every time. By the time this had happened Rin had picked up her mobile phone.

"Hello, reception, what should I do if I wasn't blessed with a reliable Servant?" asked Rin turning away from the bizarre scene.

………………………………...

Later that day

Shirou has a dream…

A dream about Saber in cosplay costumes, with the maid, Rin's outfit, swimsuit, bunny girl, neko Saber, and the loli Saber…

"Hey Saber I had a dream about you." said Shirou.

"Oh Shirou, you've entered me so many times." claimed Saber.

"Ha, yeah," Shirou's face went to the dumb stage, "wait what…?"

"He is stupid isn't he?" said Rin to Archer.

"Yep." he said simply.

………………………………...

Still later, Kotomines Church

Lancer jumps out of nowhere, "Here's Jonny!"

"Sup." said Shirou.

Suddenly Shirou's tiny little brain notices Gae Bolg.

"OOOWWW!" yelled Shirou, "you stabbed me in the friggin' heart you drunk Irish 'Beep'!"

"What the hell I haven't even…?" began Lancer.

Then the Irishman's brain twigged.

"Oh right you are then…" said Lancer stabbing Shirou in the heart, rubbing the back of his head, "this is the part where I am supposed to come on and kill you."

"No duh!" said Rider.

"Wait what the hell, you ain't in this story get out, out, out, out I say!" yelled Lancer pushing Rider off screen.

………………………………...

Later at night

"Rin where the hell were you!" exclaimed Archer, "you and I were supposed to have totally hot …"

"Archer, there are young people reading these things," said Rin, "hey where's Saber I have news."

"Living room." said Archer pointing in the general direction.

Living room

"Saber."

"Yes Rin." said Saber standing up.

"IdidsomesearchingandfoundLancer'soriginalMasterwithhercommandspellstrippedawaywhichmeanssomeoneelseiscontrolingLancerandalsoArcher'sreallymadeatmebecausewedidn'thavesexlikenormal…" said Rin taking a deep breath, "by the way where's Shirou?"

"…"

Saber armoured herself and leapt out the door, while saying, "damn it he's gone to get himself killed again!"

Archer stepped in the room and said, "what the hell was that?"

"Shirou being an idiot and gone to commit suicide or something, wasn't really listening." said Rin with a shrug.

"I knew he'd crack eventually." said Archer.

…………………………

Later, Saber arrives at Kotomine's church

"Holy, holy, crap, crap, Shirou!" cried Saber upon seeing her Master lying on the floor with blood pooling around his limp body.

"Yo Saber! I stabbed 'im with me Gar Bolg, oh yeah!" said Lancer.

"Don't you mean Gae Bulg?" questioned Saber, "beside Gar is Archer's thing."

"Meh, same thing." said Lancer shrugging off the comment.

"So Saber you came all this way for Shirou, to hell with the lord you can take him." said Kotomine, the supposable priest of the church.

"Dude, aren't you supposed to be a priest?" asked Saber.

"So, I can still mock the lord." said Kotomine.

"Yes, wonderful…" said Saber sarcastically.

"But since I'm the kind priest I am I might be able to hook you two up with the grail thingo." said Kotomine.

"Why would I want the grail I don't deserve it!" said Shirou.

Start flashback

"Help us little Shirou we're all smouldering in this giant fire covering the city!" cried a random civilian.

"Stuff you!" said little Shirou running away only to collapse later.

End flashback

"That guy is insane," said Kotomine, "how about you Servant Saber, kill your pathetic excuse of a Master, I give you the grail."

"Nah…"

Start flashback

"Help us o great and mighty king, for we art thou dying in this giant warre!" cried a peasant.

"Stuff you thy peasant!" cried the once true king.

End flashback

"You guys disgust me." said Kotomine.

"Saber do it." said Shirou.

The blonde Servant nodded.

"Exuzu…!" began Saber, "…Haiba!"

"NOOOOOO!" screamed Lancer and Kotomine as they got fried by Excalibur.

"Hey what's up guys," said Gilgamesh, "I'm the bone of my sword, haha!"

"Don't you mean 'Bane'?" asked Shirou.

"Shirou we leaving now!" said Saber dragging Shirou away, "see ya later Gilgamesh!"

"Yeah, sure whatever…" said Gilgamesh, "…wait a sec…"

………………………..

Outside Church

"So Shirou about that holy grail." said Saber.

"I really feel like beer." said Shirou.

"Eh?, I think we should get Rin and Archer and smash Berserker into tiny pieces, " said Saber "what do think?"

"Let's do it!" said Shirou.

"It's not a very appropriate time don't you think?" asked Saber.

"That's not what I meant." said Shirou.

"..Right…" said Saber, "I knew that."

……………………………..

A/N well I hope this was good and you found it funny, if some of the lines sounded familiar it's because I used some of the lines from the comics by Velox.