Chapter 2: October 2015
As September turned into October, Molly and her friends were overjoyed, as their Professors had finally moved on from first year review and started to teach real second year material. In charms, they were learning to cast the gripping spell; in potions they were studying swelling solutions; and in astronomy, Professor Brunwell was finally letting them study the movement of the skies, instead of just stationary images.
It was good, to be learning new things. Molly couldn't have asked for anything more. As it turned out though, this sentiment wasn't shared by all of her friends.
"I need something else to do," Julie said one day.
"What do you mean, something else?" Debbie questioned.
"I mean… I don't know," Julie said. "Something to do other than sit around all day."
"I don't understand," Molly frowned. "You're saying you don't want to study anymore?"
"Of course I still want to study," Julie assured her. "It's just that… I don't know, I guess I'm just feeling a little restless."
"I completely understand," Sarah said. "Like, you just want to go outside and move around a bit."
"Exactly," Julie agreed. "Except that would be a huge waste of time, of course," she added.
"We just have to find something productive to do outdoors," Sarah said.
"We could try studying by the lake," Debbie suggested. "It's still good weather, so it wouldn't get too cold."
"No, that'll only turn into a disaster," Julie shook her head. "The wind would be blowing our notes everywhere and we'd get all dirty from sitting in the grass."
"The notice for flying lessons went up on the notice board the other day," Sarah offered. "We could sign up to take them again."
"Aren't those only for first years?" Molly pointed out.
"Anyone can sign up," Debbie said. "Only it's usually only the first years that do it."
"Well why would we do it anyway?" Molly shook her head, the thought so ridiculous she could barely entertain it. "We've already taken our lessons and we all got certified."
"Well, if I'm being honest, I don't think my flying's as good as it could be," Sarah said. "At the time, I was so focused on getting through the lessons that I didn't put much thought into finesse. I think I'd like to go for the O though."
"This is insane!" Molly cried. "It's not like classes, where we have to do our best. Flying is just a useless skill."
"I think Sarah's right," Julie said. "It would be good to improve my flying skills. And they aren't necessarily useless. What if my future job requires that I fly on occasion?"
"I guess you have a point there," Molly allowed, her heart sinking. She'd disliked flying lessons with a passion the first time around. If she got roped into taking them over again…
"Well I'm in too," Debbie agreed. "It'll be a nice change of pace."
"I – What about school?" Molly demanded, feeling like the only one with any rational sense left. "What about our classes? We're going to fall behind!"
"No we won't," Julie disagreed. "Flying lessons are an hour after classes once a week, that's hardly going to impact our coursework."
Molly sighed. Clearly her friends were going to move forward with this, and if she didn't want to be stuck studying alone, she was going to have to join them.
"Fine," she muttered, appalled with herself. She should be more independent. She shouldn't feel compelled to do something just because everyone else was doing it. But here she was. "I guess we're going to flying lessons."
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The first day of flying lessons, Molly and her friends made their way down to the Quidditch pitch along with the rest of the first year Gryffindors. They'd spoken to Madame Volant, and the flying instructor had agreed to let Debbie and Julie join the Gryffindor class, even though it was highly irregular. Molly and her friends had wanted to take the lessons altogether, or else the point of doing it would have been lost. Madame Volant didn't seem to mind too much, given that the girls were already certified, and therefore shouldn't get in the way all that much.
"Molly?" Louis frowned when he caught sight of his cousin. "What are you doing here?"
"Re-taking the flying lessons," Molly explained, fetching a broom from the broom shed and lining up with the other students.
"But why?" Louis frowned.
"So that I can learn to fly better," Molly snapped. "Now leave me alone and focus on your own flying."
Molly felt bad for snapping, but she was starting to feel nervous. Though she'd received her flying certification already, she suspected that she'd only barely passed the evaluation. Flying lessons had been a miserable experience for her the first time around, and now she found herself willingly putting herself in a position to be tortured all over again.
Madame Volant instructed everyone to place their brooms next to them on the ground and then to call their brooms up. Molly did this without hesitation, and her broom came to her immediately. The first years gaped at Molly and her friends, impressed that they were so advanced. Molly laughed to herself, knowing that the impression wouldn't last long.
Too soon, it was time to practice hovering. Molly mounted her broom carefully and held on tightly as she forced herself to rise into the air only slightly and remain hovering until Madame Volant blew her whistle, telling them all to return to the ground.
"Molly, what's wrong with you?" Julie demanded. "You look like you're going to be sick."
"I just don't like the feeling," Molly explained. "Of being in the air. I like having solid ground under my feet."
"Well then why on earth did you agree to re-take your flying lessons?" Debbie asked.
Molly shrugged. "You all were doing it," she said. "And you made some good points. Just because I don't enjoy flying doesn't mean I shouldn't be good at it."
Madame Volant went through some more of her usual exercises, which Molly completed reluctantly. While the rest of the class zoomed around the Quidditch pitch in fast circles, Molly flew at a ridiculously slow speed, afraid that if she went too fast, she might fly into something.
"Molly, come on," Sarah urged. "You can speed up just a little. I've lapped you four times now."
"I'm just being careful," Molly said, refusing to pick up the pace at all.
"Even your cousin has managed to lap you," Sarah added, gesturing to Louis, who was now just ahead of Molly.
"Well obviously Louis is a good flier," Molly said.
"No," Sarah laughed. "He really isn't."
She flew off, leaving Molly to ponder that.
After the allocated hour, Madame Volant dismissed the class, sending them back up to the castle while she cleaned everything up.
"You guys go on ahead," Molly said, urging her friends to return without her. "I just have a could questions for Madame Volant."
"Alright," Debbie agreed, putting her broom away. "We'll see you up in the study room?"
"Sure," Molly nodded. "If not, I'll definitely see you at dinner though. We're sitting at Ravenclaw tonight, right?"
Julie nodded, a concerned look in her eye, but didn't question Molly further. As her friends disappeared, Molly approached Madame Volant.
"Excuse me?" she asked, trying to catch her instructor's attention.
"Ah, Molly, how can I help you?" Madame Volant asked.
"Well, I'm sure you're aware that I'm not a particularly good flier…" Molly began hesitantly.
"Oh no," Madame Volant frowned. "Don't say that. I wouldn't have certified you if I didn't think you could fly."
"I know I can fly," Molly amended. "I'm just… well I'm not very good at it. I can't go fast, or very high off the ground. I'm… cautious."
"Caution isn't necessarily a bad thing," Madame Volant pointed out.
"I suppose not," Molly allowed. "But I feel like I'm… limiting myself. I want to be the best. And I can't be the best if I let myself be scared by something as simple as flying."
"I don't think you're scared of flying," Madame Volant said. "I think you're afraid of hurting yourself."
Molly nodded. Madame Volant was right – Molly was afraid that if she went too fast or flew too high, she could have an accident and land in the hospital wing.
"Tell you what," Madame Volant said. "I have some time free. Get back on that broom and try flying just a little bit faster than you were before. I'll be right here, with my undivided attention directed solely on you. If you're going to crash, I'll stop you before you can hurt yourself, alright?"
Molly nodded. "It's worth a try," she decided. If she was going to do this, she was going to do it right. Molly liked to commit to things. She didn't like only giving 50%.
Molly mounted her broom and kicked off, starting at her regular speed. When Madame Volant called out to remind her to speed up just a little, Molly did so, determined now to see this thing through.
"That's good Molly," Madame Volant called out. "Now how about you try going just a little higher? If you fall, I'll be sure to slow you down."
Molly did as instructed, tilting her broom upwards a bit, putting just a little more distance between herself and the ground. She felt good, with the wind rushing past her face and her hair streaming out behind her. Suddenly feeling more confident, Molly flew just a little higher and a little faster, enjoying the feeling of pride as she did.
Suddenly, Molly momentarily lost her balance, leaning to the side and causing her broom to start to turn over. She cried out, grasping the handle of her broom firmly as she attempted to right herself. She was still flying fast, and she did all that she could to slow herself as she flew straight for the stands. She couldn't turn, because she was still hanging off the side, and she was failing in her attempts to slow herself.
Just then, she felt some outside force pulling her back, and realized that Madame Volant was stopping her from crashing. Relief flooded through her and she stretched her legs towards the ground, eager to feel the stable, solid earth under her feet once more.
"That was an excellent start," Madame Volant congratulated Molly. "I'm quite impressed."
"I don't think I want to do that again," Molly said, her body trembling from her ordeal.
"Are you sure?" Madame Volant asked. "You were doing wonderfully. It's normal to lose your balance every now and again."
Molly shook her head. She'd hated that feeling of being completely out of control. She'd been hurtling forward, with no way of stopping herself or changing course. She'd been at the complete mercy of her broom and completely dependent on Madame Volant to save her.
"No, I'm sorry," Molly shook her head. "I can't. I don't think I can continue flying lessons."
"Well it's up to you," Madame Volant said. "You've already been certified, so you don't have to be here. I hope you'll change your mind though. If you decide to come next week, you're more than welcome."
Molly thanked Madame Volant for her help and apologized for wasting her time.
"You haven't wasted my time at all," Madame Volant said. "I'm always happy to help out any student."
By the time Molly returned to the castle, there was no point going to the fifth floor, because by the time she got there she'd only have to come back down. Instead she chose a place at the Ravenclaw table and started to pick at her food, waiting for her friends to descend.
"There you are Molly!" Julie exclaimed upon entering the Hall. "Where have you been?"
"Just talking with Madame Volant," Molly said, not mentioning the flying bit. "I don't think I'm going to continue with flying lessons."
"What do you mean?" Sarah frowned. "We're doing them together."
"Flying's just not for me," Molly shrugged.
"So what, you're just going to sit alone and study while we're out flying?" Julie demanded. "I thought we were friends."
"We are," Molly assured her. "This isn't about our friendship, it's about me not liking flying."
"But you did fine today," Debbie pointed out. "You don't have to go fast or anything. Nobody minds if you want to go slowly."
"But I don't want to fly at all," Molly said. "I don't feel comfortable."
"Fine," Julie said, ending the conversation. "Whatever. It's your choice."
Molly felt awful about the whole thing, but didn't know how else to explain it. She really just didn't want to fly anymore. She wished her friends could understand that.
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The following week, when it was time for flying lessons, Molly said goodbye to her friends on the second floor, parting from them and heading up to the fifth floor by herself while they trooped down to the grounds. Julie had seemed mad that Molly hadn't reconsidered, and Sarah had seemed disappointed. Only Debbie seemed to understand that Molly's decision wasn't about them, but about herself.
Molly arrived on the fifth floor and made her way to their study room, closing the door behind her and sitting down at her desk. She had a herbology assignment, a history of magic paper, and some transfiguration reading to do. She decided to start with transfiguration, and pulled out her textbook, flipping it open to the correct page.
After about fifteen minutes, Molly's thoughts got too loud to pay attention to her textbook anymore, and she furiously shut it closed, slamming it onto her desk. Why did her friends have to be so self-centered? This wasn't all about them, after all.
Molly walked over to the window and opened it, leaning out and looking down at the ground. She could see the Quidditch pitch from here, as well as all the students flying around it. She couldn't tell who was who, but she thought she saw some flashes of blue, so she figured those must be Debbie and Julie.
Molly wasn't going to change her mind. Just like she always gave 100% in the things that she did, she was also completely committed to not going back to flying lessons. She shouldn't care that her friends were upset. She shouldn't care about what anybody else thought about anything. The fact that she'd agreed to go back to flying lessons in the first place was baffling. Since when did Molly let other people dictate her decisions?
With a start, Molly realized that her friendships were exactly what she'd always thought they weren't. She'd always thought she was above those friendships where you make allowances for each other and do things you don't want to do because the other person wants to. For Molly, her friendships had always been a thing of convenience – they all liked to study and valued the same things, and so they'd banded together. So when had that turned into something else?
With this realization came another. If she was going to fix things, she had to make a gesture – show her friends that she cared. Did she care? Molly realized the answer was yes. She wanted her friends to go on liking her. She didn't like when they were mad at her. Of course, Molly also couldn't simply go back to flying lessons, because she'd made it pretty clear that she was never going to do that again. She wasn't going to compromise herself for her friends.
Knowing what she had to do, and aware that it was going to be a complete waste of valuable study time, Molly left her belongings behind and began to descend to the main floor of the castle. She didn't have to join the flying lessons, but she at least had to support her friends in their endeavor.
Molly reached the Entrance Hall and exited the castle, slowly making her way down to the grounds. The flying lessons were half over, which meant that she would only have to wait a half an hour. Still, it was a long time to be away from her homework for no good reason.
Molly reached the pitch and climbed into the stands, choosing a seat in the middle and leaning back, looking between the students for her friends.
"Molly!" Sarah cried in surprise, flying over. "What are you doing here?"
"Well I might not want to fly," Molly said. "But that doesn't mean I'm going to sit up in that castle all alone."
"I'm glad you came," Sarah smiled.
"Go on," Molly said, waving her friend on. "Practice your turns or whatever."
Sarah flew off in Julie and Debbie's directions, pulling them to a stop to say something. She pointed in Molly's direction and Molly smiled and waved. Debbie and Julie both seemed happy to see her and Molly realized that she'd made the right decision coming down here.
"It was nice of you to come," Julie said later when lessons were over. "But why did you?"
"Isn't that what friends do?" Molly asked. "Support one another? Watch each other fly around in circles?"
"I guess it is," Julie smiled.
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The next week, when class was over, Molly immediately started to follow her friends down to the Quidditch pitch.
"Hey, look Molly," Julie said, stopping in the middle of a corridor. "You really don't have to come with us."
"But I want to," Molly insisted.
"No you don't," Debbie said. "You want to work on that charms assignment."
"Okay," Molly allowed. "I want to work on charms. But I can work on it after your lessons are over."
"Look, it's fine. We're friends. You don't have to sit around for an hour watching us fly," Julie said. "We understand that flying isn't your thing and it was wrong of us to make you feel bad about quitting."
"Are you sure though?" Molly asked. "Because I really don't mind coming down."
"No, we would feel bad if you came down and wasted an hour you could be spending doing something productive," Sarah said. "Go study. We'll join you when we're done."
Bidding her friends goodbye, Molly practically skipped up to the fifth floor. She was excited to get to work on her charms assignment, but even more happy that her friends had understood and accepted her reluctance to fly again. And she felt good about the separation. Last week, the separation had been stained by the negativity of their parting. Today though, things were good, and Molly couldn't imagine needing anything else.
