Note: While I know that only Roxas and Xion can collect hearts, I'm going to refer to the other members are going on heart-collecting missions anyway.
It was Monday, and the Organization were back to work. They had met in the Grey Area at the start of the day and Saix had assigned them all their missions. There were some unfavourable matches, and the Organization grumbled as they paired up and summoned their portals to leave.
As soon as they arrived in Wonderland, Roxas, Demyx and Axel began swinging their weapons madly, not caring if they hit Heartless or that annoying white rabbit that they loved to torment so. Before long, they had collected the required amount of hearts, and were heading back to the portal when Roxas noticed that Demyx and Axel were rather miserable-looking.
"What's the matter with you two? Normally you love it here in Wonderland? There the shrinking potion, and the talking doorknob, and that fat lady! What's the matter?
Axel folded his arms and groaned. "Xemnas took away my powers for a whole week! How can I enjoy killing things if I can't burn them?" He began to sob and Roxas rolled his eyes before turning to Demyx, who was sitting perched on a mushroom, his sitar lying to his side and not on his lap as usual.
"And what's the problem with you, Demyx?" Roxas asked, wondering what could possibly be making the Melodious Nocturne miserable.
Demyx smiled grimly, and Roxas could automatically tell it was forced. "Nothin', Roxas. Let's go." He stood up, grabbed his sitar and began walking back towards the portal. Roxas began to console Axel as Demyx walked rather stiffly.
Ouch…burns…in embarrassing…places…ow.
*
Ah, Twilight Town. The Most Boring Place In Existance, thought Zexion, as he and Xigbar headed down the road. And that background music! It was still stuck in his brain since last time!
Zexion sighed as he cast a discrete spell to block his ears up to the music. Anyway, Saix had told them that their mission was to "Test your agility by finding several Organization emblems," which Zexion knew was code for "Xemnas lost all his Organization emblems. Go and get them back."
They soon split up to find the lost Emblems. Before long, Zexion found himself confronted by a very odd-looking creature, wearing a blue jacket, a pointy hat and a black face. The creature stared up at him quizzically, holding out its hand in a gesture of friendship. Zexion immediately beat it unconscious with his lexicon, then went to look for Xigbar, who was no doubt hunting for whisks to destroy.
*
Marluxia and Larxene were surprised when it was announced that Xemnas, the Superior himself, would be accompanying them on their mission to Beast's Castle today. The Superior normally did nothing except sit on his ass all day with Saix bringing him tea.
As soon as they stepped out of the portal, Marluxia turned to Xemnas. "Superior, why are you with us today?" But he thought he already knew the answer.
Xemnas frowned at Marluxia. "Because, you two, whenever one of you goes on a mission, a lot of that world's native inhabitants end up severely injured and in therapy."
Marluxia stared down at his feet but Larxene protested. "How are we supposed to know they aren't Heartless? Some of them look like them…" Her voice faded away.
Xemnas simply shook his head. "Look, I'm here to make sure you aren't causing trouble in the worlds. Look, you need to collect hearts today, so don't pay attention to me at all."
As the pair fought off Heartless, Xemnas loomed over them like a paranoid boss, making it hard to concentrate at all. Eventually, after hiding from a talking candlestick for the tenth time, the pair snapped and instantly struck the candlestick with vines and jolts of electricity. Xemnas simply stared in shock as the candlestick collapsed onto the floor, mumbling to himself and wide-eyed.
Eventually, the noise died down, the only sounds of Marluxia and Larxene's heavy pants as they rested from their anger. Just as Xemnas was about to say something, Larxene turned, snatched up the candlestick and made a glare that said, if you say one more thing I will personally insert the candlestick somewhere it shouldn't.
"Meep" murmured Xemnas, then teleported away.
Marluxia and Larxene smiled and continued on their mission.
*
Xaldin hated going to Never Land. After over twenty missions here, that fairy would still not give the power of flight. Even after hours spent buying gifts and even a moonlight dinner by the sea. Maybe it was his dreadlocks. Or his sideburns. Maybe he should just go bald. He didn't know.
After all, how the hell was he supposed to complete his missions if he was stuck on one small rock in the sea. Cursed portals, always placing him on the same rock. He had spent many hours sitting there, throwing rocks at Heartless when they passed so he could actually collect hearts.
And today he was partnered with the new girl, Xion. She wouldn't say a word, wouldn't remove her hood, and wouldn't really do anything to improve Xaldin's mood. They simply sat there on that rock, small pebbles in hand, alert for coming Heartless.
This is pathetic. Why does Saix make us come here if we can't even do anything? When I get back I'll rip him a new one, with one spear or six.
Suddenly, the little yellow fairy appeared, flitting around their heads and sprinkling them with yellow dust. What was she doing? Unless…
Before he knew it, Xion was flying, hovering off the ground. No, it couldn't be. What had he done different today? Maybe it was that perfume Vexen had made for him? He jumped up in the air, and he was flying.
Just as he started flying towards a likely-looking Heartless, one of his dreadlocks drifted in front of his eye, and in his attempt to brush it out of his eye, he lost altitude, smashing into Xion and sending them both tumbling down towards a rock.
No problem, thought Xaldin. But then he realized he couldn't fly anymore, and the last thing he saw before he and Xion smashed into the ground was that fairy giggling at him.
*
Of all the places to send the Chilly Academic, the sweltering heat of Agrabah would be the worst. He was the pure embodiment of ice, and if he wasn't as psychotic, he would have melted instantly and ran screaming away.
And even so, Saix was with him, so he wouldn't have dared anyway. There mission was to investigate some ruins on the outskirts of the walled city, in the hot, sweat-inducing, burning…
Vexen realized he was lying on the ground, rocking back and forth. He quickly got up before Saix saw him then caught up his ally. As they walked towards the city gates, they encountered a few Heartless in their way, which included one particularly violent one that he suspected was the secret child of Saix, Xaldin and Lexaeus.
He quickly shook that particularly disturbing image from his head, as they reached the city gates. Suddenly, Saix ducked behind some crates, and Vexen did likewise. A small monkey ran into the courtyard, wearing a fez.
This was bad. As anyone with common sense knew, small fury animals instantly set off Saix's Berserk…
The monkey ran as Saix emerged, swinging his claymore and screaming with rage.
*
Luxord and Lexaeus had finished their mission in the Olympus Coliseum and were just heading out when Luxord suggested that they play a game to decide who supervised Xigbar as he tried to cook tonight, a task nobody relished.
Typical, thought Lexaeus, another card game. I'll lose. Still, I might as well try.
"I have here a pack of Tarot cards." He gave Lexaeus the cards, who checked them. All in order. "I will randomly stack them, then you will pick one. If you pick one that starts with "The", you win." Luxord smiled grimly.
That was odd, thought Lexaeus. There are a lot more cards that start with "The", than the ones that don't. The Sun, The High Priestess, The Emperor…
He picked one after Luxord had stacked them. The Fool. He won!
Lexaeus resisted doing a victory dance (he'd do that in his room later), and handed the card back to Luxord, who smiled.
"You win."
It was only later that Xemnas told them all that their jobs would be randomly swapped tonight. Lexaeus almost instantly collapsed when he found he would have to supervise Saix's Anger Management classes.
