"Your mind's made up?"
"Why did the Keyblade choose me? I have to know."
"You can't turn on the Organization! You get on their bad side and they'll destroy you!"
"No one would miss me."
"That's not true! I would…"
Axel was jerked awake by the sound of knocking at his door. Disoriented, he rubbed his eyes, looking around for his alarm clock. He realized he was still holding the WINNER stick and quickly hid it back underneath his pillow.
"Come in."
His door opened, revealing the presence of Demyx, Luxord, and Xigbar. "Knock knock! Hey Axel, you wanna go get stoned with us? Luxord bought some cool new dope from a caterpillar in Wonderland today. We're all gonna go try it out!"
Axel, stretching and scratching his head, struggled to process Demyx's invitation in his half-asleep state. "Did you say 'a caterpillar?'"
Luxord chuckled, "It's a rather unusual story."
"One that'll sound way better if you come downstairs and try this with us," Xigbar chimed in. "Come on, it'll be fun."
Axel reflected for a moment. He found their offer tempting; it was a happy miracle that any of them were still able to feel physical pleasure without hearts, and Luxord's story sounded like it would be intriguing. Axel could admit to himself that he had felt pretty lonely the past few days since his only company was an unconscious Roxas. 'Fun' seemed almost like a foreign concept to him, and he was beginning to miss it.
Axel stood, yawning. "All right, I'll meet you down there. Just got something I gotta do first."
"Going to look in on Roxas again? You know what they say, a watched pot never boils." Luxord advised from behind his cards.
"Yeah, yeah," Axel scoffed. "Look, I'll be right down. Keep my seat warm, okay?"
Demyx played an off-key trill on his sitar as they turned to leave. "Don't keep us waiting!"
"See you there." Axel replied, shaking his head as they took off down the hall. He traipsed over to his mirror, adjusting his sleepy, disheveled appearance. It felt like it had been ages since he had looked at his reflection. His face was pale and his fiery red hair unkempt. Dark circles had formed under his eyes, and he seemed to be practically swimming in his coat. Drugs were the last thing his horrendously neglected body needed now, but he could think of no better remedy for his situation than to spend time relaxing with his friends.
Axel quickly gave up on fussing with his looks for now and headed out into the hall. The long walk to Roxas' room seemed to get longer each time he made the trek, giving him just that much more time alone with his intrusive thoughts. Determined not to spoil his relatively decent mood, he picked up the pace, ignoring the taunting whispers in his mind. The eerie silence in the hall was soon interrupted by the sound of footsteps. He looked up to see Saïx approaching from Roxas' doorway, appearing to have just finished a conversation with Zexion. The scientist stared in Saïx's direction with an expression Axel couldn't read from so far away, then entered Roxas' room, shaking his head.
"Axel," Saïx called out as he slowly sauntered toward him. "I hope the time off is serving you well."
Axel averted his eyes, hiding his gaunt and sickly appearance from his comrade. It was unlike him to be polite. Saïx halted in front of Axel, eyeing him carefully up and down with a questioning look. "If I might point out," he uttered with false concern for Axel's well-being. "You do not appear rested."
Axel glared at him, crossing his arms, "I'm just having a bad hair day."
Saïx did not react to Axel's deflection. "I will need you back to work soon. I expect you to be functioning at full capacity."
"I appreciate your concern, sir. "
There was a pause, each man staring daggers into the other's eyes. Finally, Saïx broke the standoff and proceeded onward down the hallway, only turning back briefly to send a thinly veiled warning, "Take care of yourself, Axel."
Axel watched him as he strolled off into the distance, his long black robes flowing behind him. He unconsciously clenched his fist, grinding his teeth until his jaw was sore. He snapped himself back into the present and made for Roxas' room. Zexion was beside the bed, holding one of Roxas' wrists and staring at his timepiece.
Axel approached the bed slowly, peering at Roxas from over Zexion's shoulder. "How is he?"
After several seconds of silence, Zexion placed Roxas' arm carefully back down onto the bed.
"Unchanged for now. But his vitals are improving."
Relief washed over Axel and he sighed heavily. "Well, that's good news, I guess."
"Indeed. It's a promising sign for his recovery." He scribbled a few things on his clipboard before collecting his materials and looking up at Axel's face. He raised an eyebrow as he examined the man. "You, on the other hand—"
"Save it. I slept all day."
Zexion narrowed his eyes, then nodded reluctantly. He pulled a chair next to Roxas' bed and gestured for Axel to take his usual seat before heading to the doorway.
"Wait.. Zexion." Axel called out before he could leave. "Tell me what Saïx wanted. Why was he here?"
Zexion pursed his lips, keeping his back to Axel in order to conceal his anxious expression.
"H-he just wanted an update on Roxas' condition. Official business."
Axel didn't believe him for a second, but had no desire to get him in trouble with Saïx for revealing his true motives. He grunted in acknowledgement of Zexion's answer, and the scientist hurried out of the room. The sound of his quick footsteps gradually faded into the distance as Axel gazed at Roxas' sleeping face. His expression was almost tranquil, as if he were wrapped in the comfort of a pleasant dream. Axel pondered as he watched him. Was Roxas dreaming? Could he dream in this state? What would he dream about?
He took Roxas' hand, announcing his presence to him. He had no idea if Roxas could ever hear him, but he often spoke to him, usually telling him about that day's events. Lately, however, he realized that he didn't have much to tell. He watched Roxas sleep in silence for several minutes as he waited for words to come to him, but they never did.
"Sleep well, buddy." He whispered softly, smiling at his friend. He gave Roxas' hand a gentle squeeze, and perhaps he was hallucinating from lack of sleep, but he could have sworn he felt Roxas squeeze back. He gasped, fixing his stare on his friend, expecting he would open his eyes at any moment. Sadly, that moment did not come. Crestfallen, he let go of Roxas' hand and stood, giving him one last glance before slowly trudging out of the room.
"Your report, Saïx."
"I spoke with Vexen this morning regarding his new breakthrough with the replica program. He would like to propose an experiment. One that will involve Roxas."
"Interesting… And how is Roxas?"
"I've been to see him. His condition is unchanged. I spoke with Zexion on this matter as well, and he recommends against it."
"Can either of them predict when he will awaken?"
"No, sir. They can't even guarantee that he will wake from this at all."
"I see… What is your opinion of Vexen's experiment?"
"Uncertain. I'm not entirely convinced, given his track record."
"A reasonable apprehension. However, I see no harm in hearing what he has to say. Call a meeting for tomorrow morning. Attendance will be optional, but all thirteen are invited."
"Sir, it is likely that Axel will attend, and he will surely protest on Roxas' behalf."
"Many decisions are made behind closed doors… a dangerous practice which rouses suspicion in the lower rungs. It is important that we present the illusion of transparency in order to maintain our members' trust. Additionally… I like to keep a close eye on any dissidents."
"Understood, sir."
"Dismissed."
Their eyes fixed on Luxord's hands in amazement as they watched him shuffling his deck of cards with incredible skill. The sounds of music and giggling rang through the air as smoke filled the room. Axel sank deeper into the sofa, staring at the ceiling, enjoying the rhythmic pulsating feeling in his eyeballs. Beside him, Demyx casually leaned his body against him, strumming lazily on his sitar.
Luxord fanned the cards out on the table, instructing Xigbar to choose four of them at random. To their delight, the cards he chose made up all four aces. Axel turned to watch just in time for the finisher: Luxord reached behind Xigbar's ear and pulled a card seemingly out of thin air. He turned the card to his audience, a nine of spades, and addressed his volunteer, "Is this your card?"
Demyx squealed with excitement and Xigbar applauded, chuckling, both impressed by the trick. Luxord bowed his head in acknowledgement, then returned to shuffling his cards. Xigbar leaned back in his seat and listened to Demyx's playing. Axel was staring at the ceiling again, his arm wrapped around Demyx's shoulders. The vibration from the strings on Demyx's sitar seemed to travel from the instrument through his body and into Axel's. Hyper-aware of every sensation, all of them thoroughly pleasurable, Axel finally could relax.
"All right Axel, spill. What's got into you lately?"
Xigbar's voice yanked him from his trance and he paused, searching his brain for the right words. So much for relaxing…
"What do you mean?"
"You look so down in the dumps, man! Brooding, avoiding people, it ain't like you."
"Not to mention you look like a plague victim." Demyx slurred, giggling. Axel returned his insult with a playful punch on the shoulder.
"So what's eatin' you? Come on, we're your friends, you can tell us anything!"
Axel, irritated, crossed his arms, sighing at their probing questions. "What is this, an interrogation? There's nothing wrong with me."
"I've known you for a long time, buddy, and you've never looked this busted. Come on, you'll probably feel better if you get it off your chest." Xigbar never dropped his cool and laid-back attitude, making his concerned appeals sound more like casual curiosity.
"I'm fine, Xigbar. I've just been tired, that's all."
"It's Roxas, isn't it?"
Luxord's suggestion sent a hush over the group. Axel kept his head down, refusing to acknowledge the accusation, correct as it was.
"That's what's bothering you? Aw, come on, man, he'll be fine! I'm sure he'll open those peepers any day now."
Axel scoffed, returning his gaze to the ceiling. He focused on the sound of Demyx absentmindedly plucking at his sitar. He could play quite well, even intoxicated and with half his attention diverted away to other happenings. The song was slow and melancholic, a drastic shift from Demyx's usual stylistic preferences. Xigbar nudged him with his foot, "Can't you play something a little more.. I don't know.. upbeat? You're bumming me out with that sad music."
Demyx had flipped himself over until he was sitting upside-down on the sofa, his face reddening as all the blood rushed to his head. "Wrong drugs, dude. But call me when you find some uppers!"
"Yeah call me when you can pitch in, ya mooch. I don't get paid enough for that junk."
"We don't get paid at all."
"Exactly," Xigbar responded with a snap, leaning back in his chair and clasping his fingers behind his head. Demyx continued to play, humming along softly as he worked out the arrangement. The piece was quite lovely, with its smooth melody and colorful harmonies. With eyes closed, his playing intensified as the chords modulated toward a climactic break. The sweeping overtones sparkled in the background. The performanced shifted from subdued and deliberate to robust and passionate. Axel was surprised by the level of emotion he could convey.
"Jeez, Demyx, are you sick or something? That song doesn't sound like you at all."
"Rude!" Demyx scoffed in mock-offense. "I happen to be an extremely versatile composer."
"Versatile," Axel echoed with a sly grin. "I'll say. I think you're just tripping balls."
"Hey!" Demyx elbowed him jokingly, turning himself right side up again and wobbling a bit from the dizziness. Their giddy laughter was contagious, spreading to Luxord and Xigbar in seconds flat, growing so loud that they didn't hear the sound of approaching footsteps.
"Such a racket. Isn't it past your bedtime?"
Their laughter ceased immediately as they watched Saïx amble in their direction.
"Saïx! What's got you up at this hour?" Xigbar greeted their superior cheerfully, lightening the mood after such a sudden shock to their good spirits.
"I could ask you the same question." His cold eyes scanned the group briefly before landing on Axel and Demyx. "Really, gentlemen, I thought we were above substance abuse."
"Actually, we're right in the middle of substance abuse."
Axel practically applauded Demyx's comeback, stifling a chuckle as he saw Saïx's eyes narrow, unamused.
"You should join us! When's the last time you had some fun?" Axel extended his invitation with a smug expression, gesturing to the open seat on the sofa. Saïx's unblinking smolder burned straight through Axel's corneas.
"I have work to do." Saïx turned to leave, stopping just before reaching the entryway. "I expect all of you to be awake on time in the morning."
"Goodnight, Saïx!" The group called out to him, carefree as ever, as he quickly left the common area. Demyx resumed noodling on his sitar while Luxord dealt himself a hand of solitaire.
"What a wet blanket."
"Seriously, who got sand in his—"
"Now, now, fellas, lets not be impolite." Axel spoke up with a sympathetic tone, hoping to restore the lighthearted atmosphere. "He is the second-in-command, after all. Maybe he's just overworked."
"We could all use a vacation." Xigbar agreed, yawning and stretching his arms high above him.
Axel reflected silently for awhile. True, he always longed for some time off, but finally getting some didn't make him feel any better. He spent every moment of his free time either staring at the motionless Roxas or lying awake in his bed. He felt sick and exhausted all the time, and was constantly fighting off the sharp pains in his chest. It was the opposite of relaxing. The last thing he wanted was more vacation.
"This is vacation enough for me." He professed with a hint of sentimentality. It wasn't much, but spending the evening getting high with his friends made a world of difference. It was nice to feel even just okay for a little while.
Axel reached his arm around Demyx's shoulders and pulled him closer so that he would lean on him again. He never was shy about being affectionate with the other Organization members, especially this particular handful of guys. Except for the more introverted of the bunch, none of the others seemed to mind, and often welcomed and returned the gestures. After all, they only had each other, and the Organization would fall to ruin if they didn't at least attempt to get along. As long as everyone's needs were met, there was peace among their number.
"Gosh Axel, you like my playing that much?"
"The vibration. It feels nice." Axel's speech had slowed considerably as the drugs infiltrated even deeper into his system.
"Pfft, thanks. I spent like twenty years perfecting my craft, only to be outdone by 'vibration.'" Their light banter was interrupted by the sound of snoring, and they all looked over to see Xigbar leaning over the side of his chair, out like a light and with his mouth hanging open. The three of them giggled quietly, covering their mouths and shushing each other so as not to wake him.
"Well, looks like that's it for him." Luxord announced, gathering up his cards.
"Is this the part where we draw on his face?" Demyx asked, eagerly, muting the strings of his instrument with his palm.
"Suppose we ought to call it a night. I think I'll turn in as well." Luxord stood and began to carefully lift Xigbar out of his chair and sling him over his shoulder with little effort. It was easy to forget how strong he was, what with his usual propensity for brains over brawn. He turned and waved at the rest of them as he headed for the entryway. "Goodnight, friends. Until next time."
"See you later, man." Axel and Demyx returned Luxord's courtesy as he stepped into the hall. Axel let his head fall back and his eyes close, feeling a bit sleepy himself. There was silence, as Demyx did not immediately return to playing his sitar.
"Alone, at last." Axel heard him whisper. He opened his eyes to find Demyx staring at him with a familiar expression on his face.
"Something on your mind?"
"Do I really have to say it?"
Axel, smirking, clasped his hands behind his head and leaned back. "Yup."
Demyx groaned with exasperation. "Come on, Axel, you know what I want. And it's so much better high."
Axel chortled at the younger man's desperation, squeezing his shoulder playfully. Demyx was a mediocre lay, but he got the job done. Axel decided to toy with him a bit, just to see how badly the kid wanted it.
"I don't know, man, are you sure? If I remember right, last time you couldn't sit down for a week—"
"Shh!! Someone could hear!"
Axel laughed as he watched Demyx turn a shade of pink. He had always been a little prideful of his polished ability to leave a lasting impression. "I'm just concerned for your well-being, Demyx! Wouldn't want you to get hurt…"
"Ugh, never mind." Demyx turned and stood, ready to leave but Axel caught him by the wrist before he could walk away. He rose to his feet, towering over the musician, and strolled alongside him as they made their way toward the main hall. He gave Demyx a frisky smack on the behind as they exited the common area.
"We'd better be quick, before this stuff wears off. But I'll go easy on you this time. Got it memorized?"
They giggled as they took off up the stairs, and after a few moments of frolicsome horseplay, they finally reached their destination and locked themselves in Demyx's room for the night.
