SUPERNATURAL STORY
The Gift
Loosing Dean - Part Two
Author's Note:
Ok I was only interpreting show whether it in anyway relates have no idea it was just what seen when watching it & felt like giving them a run for their money so was rather shocked by spoiler.
They have a show with a heart and soul like, no other so if there is any copying of anyway then so be, it comes with the work I suppose. Anyway, there is still a lot more they could do with their characters especially Dean & challenging the real thing & raising the bar is all writing is about.
Furthermore, taking the characters to places the writers do not usually go makes it worthwhile and getting an emotional roller coaster ride that should be worth the read alone so, as I said previously sorry about last post it was not meant & hopefully there is something in here worth fighting for!
This is the last part of this chapter so be prepared!
By Jenny
As I draw back from her touch not knowing what to belief only that it can only be truth with my eye now turning in shear pain and emotion to Dean his bleeding form remaining motionless as I now take things into my own hands and I cannot let that big brother of mines die:
"Go to hell bitch and my names Sam to you."
My gaze leveling with hers and the one thing I am certain off at this moment the word she had spoken to Dean in Latin when she had first touched his forehead with it being his own first name though I much doubt he himself would have recognized it in Latin.
As the demon, part of us alights, knowing now what I have to do and the knowledge it might already be too late. As I look to my brother seeing his vulnerable yet still strong image reflected back of the black of the impala directly behind him looking now to the church cursing my earlier words to him of deserving to die and my all out fear he is already dead as something breaks within.
Repeating now his name in Latin knowing I have been, possessed in the past by Meg with that being what I am hoping will tip the balance back in my own favor. As I lean in kissing this demon with the deal Dean made no longer standing at this moment as our lips meet her power merging with mines as I now in repayment touch her brow using the Latin I have previously learned from before.
My lips leaving hers the dark eyes showing the first hint of fear as I intimately touch her chin:
"That's for Dean."
My hand falling away at that our eyes meeting as she smiles again:
"Your brothers dead either way Winchester and there is nothing on this earth you can do about it."
With her hand reaching out for mines;
"I preferred him but one of you sooner or later had to fall to the dark side Sam."
As I pull away at that moment seeing the Latin words I have already spoken moments before now finely taking effect the demon at that leaving the possessed body as I speak again the language of old. Watching the sky above us with the demon not getting the chance to go elsewhere my brown eyes now blinded for a second by bright light and without any weapon other than what is within us.
I have finely destroyed one outright as I turn now towards Dean, fear knotting through us that he is already dead and I am now unable to get the chance to get any closer to him. With the woman, whose body had been possessed looking now this way with fear and non-understanding showing in her eyes as she looks along with me directly towards the only other individual near us the one who has as of yet to show any signs of live:
"Am I responsible for doing that to him?"
As I now nod seeing the horror and emotion in her dark eyes as she now points in further anxiety towards Dean:
"Do you know what that is around him too?"
With my puzzled eye seeing what she is now, meaning and it looks like a mini crop circle around my elder brother and it surrounds him outright my gaze holding now on those bright red glowing marks on the ground. Realizing almost instantly the outer star from the colt gun part of that insignia disappearing under the Impala with the second insignia where Dean is lying directly.
Being indistinguishable and both marks are defiantly, burned in there with them now in front of our eyes changing shade to black. As I now answer the woman with a blunt no moving, quickly now towards Dean the air completely still around him his body lifeless blood running yet freely from the left arm too as I look to the set features.
Blood covering most of his face wholly as I kneel down beside him slowly, turning him over with blood coming again from the forehead my hand now reaching for his wrist searching for a pulse and whatever, that demon has done. The damage is irreversible with false hope giving one thing a weak pulse as I turn back towards the woman who was possessed now cutting her some slack knowing she was not responsible for this.
That it was the demon as I now tell her so responding back to her question too:
"His names Dean and he's my older brother lady."
The tone overly harsh as I answer her again:
"He's barely with us ma'am."
As I now like her, hear alien sounds from across the street people stepping into my far vision with the alarm bell being, raised for the emergency services my brown eyes staying put as I look at Dean. Seeing the fearful extreme extent of blood loss as my gaze slides now to the left arm the blood seeping from their pulling back the sleeve of the torn checked shirt to just above the top inside elbow to where I had seen the demon touch too.
With it also being the spot, he has been scratching at since the day before as my brown eyes now rest on it. At first seeing thinking it like the mark that had been on my own arm when I had been possessed by Meg with this being higher up and somehow entirely different along with it that it is more like a cattle freeze brand or tattoo by its direct orientation design and size making it so.
The wound furthermore being deeply cut and fresh the marks easily distinguished through the blood against the raw skin and it is to my own increasing concern replicated at this moment in the ground below us. As I look again at the blood matted deep into Dean's brown short hair his eyes closed to us and though there is little chance of a response I try anyway.
Shaking him hard the first attempt giving nothing as I swallow turning my attention back to the brunette beauty who had been possessed asking her name and where she comes from her gaze giving the emotion as she now speaks her latter answer causing my own head to lift away from Dean that she is from Winchester Kansas.
As I turn, back to my older brother my emotions now cracking with the irony in her statement with it not being, too far from Lawrence either where we were heading to as I now recheck, the pulse and it is barely there. Looking too again at the mark on his left arm seeing the familiarity of the inside motif this time round and I should know it as I look with all out fear to his fragile form.
With him in typical Dean form, managing without meaning to too almost leave us entirely in the dark to what has been wrong since yesterday and what I have been trying desperately to furthermore get him to talk us about in these last miles before reaching Cherokee. Moreover, it has been to no avail worrying us sick while at it with him being completely out of sorts both inwardly and outwardly and its nothing compared to this.
As I shake him again in half brotherly anger with his soul as if in answer somehow temporarily responding the eyelids fighting open consciousness being there briefly hearing his voice weak though it is as I draw close calling his name with him slipping away again even as I try and make it out plus what it furthermore sounds like.
As I connect it to Lawrence my eye looking at his bleeding form and he is dying in front of us with his soul by whatever thread it is on still hanging in there hearing now the wail of the sirens of those who may yet bring him back and what that one word had been:
"Mum."
Latching onto that as I feel my own tears come knowing too that have been unable to safe him completely from that crossroads demon and like with our father our last words the ones before that demon appeared were not good. As I take that cold strong hand now into mines feeling the first true sense of loss and what my own jumbled thoughts can only maintain.
That the demon had no intention of ever giving him his year with her other words in some dark twisted form also amalgamating what had been starting to run through my own head Dean giving all the sure fire tell tale signs. As my brown eyes now in complete understanding continue to look at his unconscious form and I am far too late in figuring at least part of it out.
That he had not wanted to talk about it either Lawrence building on that fact too. Realization finely hitting combined with the demons words that we are a lot alike with it going beyond that as I am now forced from his side letting go of that, hand as it now lies still splayed towards the Impala letting the medical services now do their work.
As something sinks deep within as I look once more to the woman who had been possessed. The words used and the fact he cannot die that he has to hang on and not just for us as I feel guilt to what I have kept silent and it should be to our long dead mother he had called out too in that one moment of consciousness.
As my brown eyes drift to the church and then back to Dean fear growing within us and if he dies, know if that demon were in anyway speaking further truth. Then without him, hell will have already won by taking his life first as I now feel something unfamiliar to me something that Dean though has carried throughout his life protecting us along with it.
Responsibility as I draw on our own father's memory and what my big brother ever since dad died has not been able to take even when I had tried to make him see it. For it is part of the legacy that we were borne to the hunting, saving people, to what runs in both our bloods and what lives on in us both for it is what comes from both our parents.
What makes us Winchesters and what does not what that demon had told us too something new and answers all that has been wrong with him as I see those now working on him looking in my direction and it cannot be good as my thought's reline to what it is that Dean has been unable to forgive himself for.
That it has never been enough that part of our father lives on in him for it was what John furthermore sacrificed for him. That has been slowly killing him from the inside out and what is there in those hazel eyes when he thinks no one is looking for it has along with, it found new depths since leaving the state of Missouri behind us.
The dark shadow of foreseeing combined with no longer, being able to shoulder what has burned him his whole life me included and I am as much to blame for him lying here in this state as any demon could be. As someone now speaks to me replying numbly in response saying he collapsed though it's the only suitable lie I can give claim to even though it is nowhere near the truth.
With it covering well enough as the pretty, brunette woman who is still with us backs my own statement up her eye still on Dean. As I return to his side feeling the inner alarm of the last, time I seen him like this with there being an uncanny remote resemblance. With it now growing my own thoughts swirling in understanding of a different sort that I have let him down big time when he needed me most and what my confused brain can at least make sense off.
The unusual behavior of my brother backing it up that he could only, have been beginning to have visions too. As my head lifts sharply unsure of what the tattoo in the inside of his left arm has to do with it either only that they are connected directly to this soul and he needs me as I close the gap between us with that demon's words burning into my own soul.
That Dean was dead either way as I glance again at the marks on the ground aware they are a replication of what is, tattooed on his arm and I am uneasy in that knowledge that it could be something of both good and evil purpose. As one thing does ring home to what had been his words of truth, with this, being a devils trap one that could only, have been set, for him.
With Dean's last barely audible word being what now haunts me as I reach out once more taking his hand with his strong stand alone gung-ho attitude of his not saving him now and to how much real trouble we are now in:
That he is no way fighting what that demon done to him and what merges, with it something that deepens a fearful void I have always felt from him that he wants to die with it being that same thought which is with us in this now dark hospital room. As my head jerks up in the dim light with time having passed some.
Since I last tried to reach him with my gaze now moving, back to Dean the set sensitive features remaining lifeless and still. The blood washed away now from the translucent skin with him remaining as he has been from the get go here to what the doctor told us now seven days past of the head trauma the internal bleeding and what like the doctor I understand explicitly.
The contusion more or less the replica of what he had when he was last in a coma with it being no co-incidence either and the fact with difficulty the doctors had managed somehow to get him stabilized. His vitals steadily worsening as my gaze now falls back on them in the darkness reading the equipment and what I do not need told he has not got, long left.
As my thoughts now release not wanting to go there my eyes closing again to the significance this date holds. As my thoughts now, inter-collide with it being only just after five am in this remote memorial hospital. As I look again to that mark on the inside of his left arm as I remember my earlier question of some hours ago with him not waking up to answer it for us and I had furthermore ribbed him about beforehand in the Impala too.
The scratch on the inside of left arm with it neither being a bite or a scratch as my gaze shifts to the Ouija board giving it a set frown and what I had seen with my own eyes. The crossroad's demon bringing, that tattoo fully to the surface before she had tried for his soul her words then still standing now in more ways, than one.
With sending her back to hell and doing away with her what she had knocked me with that first time meeting her that I could not kill her though I had found an alternate route with her coming for him when she did that mattering none now. As my brown eyes focus on the unconscious life to the signs I myself had missed from Dean.
To all that was wrong with him and when I had furthermore tried to push it from him at the completely wrong time and place only hurting him more in the process and what it had stemmed from. That meeting with that single mother what had started the ball rolling that I should have simply known then that he could only have been having visions and he had not been handling it.
Along with what Bobby has filled us in over the last couple of days on the phone to that one time before when my brother had seen something the denial Dean had been in then and no matter how close I had managed to get him to talking about it. That I had managed to wear him down some for it had glistened pure in those hazel eyes the split second before that crossroad demon appeared.
That he had been about to tell us what I now know and either way it had been a no go subject that if he had wanted to tell me about them he would have without needing to force it from him. With that now, only being one further worry onto the billion other worries that I now have stacked on my own plate with only when he had been seriously ill before.
Forcing him against his own will to that faith healer and he had been all ready to call it quits then too. With the further responsibility what I myself held then even greater now along with the guilt my brother held ever since that first encounter with a reaper something that has continued to stay, with him in its own way.
As I think to the blonde woman who touched his soul, then and the fear that crystallizes my own, heart to what that crossroads demon had threatened would happen if Dean dies now. That it has all ready started Bobby along with Ella and Jo plus along every other demon hunter out there that there is something happening out their beyond the walls of this hospital.
The demonic possessions, the sightings, the evil which walks this earth and from the moment Dean went down they have personified in number as my, thoughts now pause only leaving his side once. To get the Impala from the front of that church and look while at it at the dead tree Dean himself had pointed out with where my brother also went down right in front of that church.
Being a big part of why this small community has come to our aid our names thankfully being, given the slip from those who might look into this coma patient's history and what is underlined underneath there kind hope that they expect him to die. The doctor more or less telling us as much as I think to what is marked in the earth in Cherokee just in front of that church and is on Deans inside left arm.
What I cannot get my own head around along with those visions he must have been having something that would have been tearing him apart as it is with my own experience telling us so and the knowledge of what that thing on his arm tells us in another cruel way. For it was brought forth with it that he has the gift the same yet different from mines remembering now the look across my big brothers face in that Missouri café and as close as I can pinpoint.
It was then he had his first vision with the others questions what that demon told us for starters as I look now slowly to that amulet of his and Dean had also touched it just before his hand had fell on that demons wrist. When she had been doing her ritual to take his soul and what was for, certain that somewhere along the lines he himself had somehow stopped her with that action with it not being completely enough.
As I listen now to what is keeping him alive. The low desolate shrill of the machines that are feeding live into him and it is the complete stillness of his lithe form, that shakes most. My gaze drifting back now to the amulet aware it is also the inside, mark of that tattoo on the inside of his left arm and I failed originally to recognize fully in Cherokee.
With it coming down to our three closest allies Bobby, Ellen, and Jo that I have at least managed to find something out to its origins. As I think on Bobby's most recent message with him always having looked on Dean as some sort of adoptive son and who to us both is the nearest thing we have to a father left plus in addition and what I do not mind.
That it is my big brother who Bobby holds in the higher regard that soft spot always visible whenever the two around each other. My brown eyes now give my brother a respective glance with how much my brother really knows about this amulet also intriguing us along with the fact though he does not know it or very often perceive it.
That there is a whole bunch of individuals out there who really do care about him with it now not only being them who are now depending on him making it as I now shoot him another one sided comment:
"You know wearing a protection amulet linked to a sun god and a demon of not the killing kind makes you pretty dam unique Dean."
As I now give the features a half grin and he is not even the religious one between us with my words coming from myth the old type as my gaze now swings back to just above the elbow at the inside of his left arm looking to the outer star their and where the two insignias cross each other. With the inner one being, a protector influenced by Shamash the amulet combined to it reinforcing its purpose and it is a rare artifact.
Given only to a select few Deans being no replica copy with how he came by it even more of a puzzle one that the clues are few and far between only that it has been at some point in his mid-teens that amulet came into his possession and it is related indirectly somehow to our late mother. As a stray memory now flickers re-aligning it to this date years before and the memory of our fathers fear for Dean.
Something that had been crystal clear that night with it being the amount of blood running down one side of my brothers features then that sticks in memory as I think to now and the fact although my big brother had never mentioned it then or since that he had not told the whole truth of what happened that night.
When he had collapsed after fighting of a demon on his fourteenth birthday, protecting us instead and it had been visible enough the look lighting those hazel eyes then into a new higher sphere. With him not giving us anything more that it had been coming for me our father taking his every word for it and whenever I had tried to push for anything further.
After our father had left it be it had been like hitting a brick wall that guard of his up at its full the hunter in him not letting me get anywhere near close though the look in the hazel sensitive eyes told otherwise. With that being the one time I am certain he had lied outright to us both and it was something else like that time before I was around.
That Dean never wanted to talk about that it was I who our father paid the higher attention to with that big brother of mines in the end looking after us both and not once in his entire life has he in anyway had it easy. As I now let out a low sigh turning to look at him with him at least managing in half irony to make up for that lack of sleep something Dean has always needed in vast quantities.
As I now shift him a stubborn look with the crossroad demons words furthermore shedding light on plenty with Dean managing again without knowing it to bring a whole, new dimension of weirdness to things and I cannot blame him outright. That he did not know himself either as I look to what causes me the highest concern of all this, my initial impression of both good and evil being in both those markings not being far of the mark.
My brown eyes now transcending the outer star against the lifeless skin and like Bobby I belief the inner insignia is the one completely warding off any evil. The outer one the opposite though it to is meant to do the exact same in context with it being the puzzle of the two together that puts it in a league of its own and it is the star all it stands for in its many different abbreviations.
That has us all worried plus if she were here and though both Ellen and I have put our foot down if Jo took one look at that mark on Dean's arm she would say it would be for taking possession of that body and soul within. With Ellen thankfully somehow managing to keep her away from here too fighting, the war that has grown outside these walls being the most Jo can do for him now and it would furthermore.
Need the devil himself to take possession of Dean and there is no way either that big brother of mines would have let her see him like this as my thoughts now grind in the knowledge of what I have now learned and the turn up for the books the inside take on that amulet starting a trend. Its links to a god and a demon of good being the tip of the iceberg with that star the outer insignia on that tattoo plus what resides on the colt gun and wards of evil.
Having a far greater deeper purpose with its meanings the pentagram not only having Christian orientation in its further background that its five points represent the wounds of Christ the annunciation, nativity, resurrection, ascension and assumption along with the five virtues of knighthood noble generosity, fellowship, purity, courtesy and compassion.
None of those being overly apparent in Dean apart from the last with it being the earliest mentions in history to that star. That have filled foreboding in my own heart with Dean's own amulet what is only a protector tied centrally to a bull-man who holds the gates of dawn open for the sun god Shamash. With the pentagram, star instead in its ancient history having astrological depth of the planets Jupiter, Mercury, Mars, Saturn, and Venus.
In addition in their simpler context they are the five elements water, earth, idea, fire, and air with its five-angle where they meet being the gates of hell the sub-dour of both men and gods alike a prison house for the soul in the underworld as my brown eyes now come to rest on it. With its Christian meaning, what Dean would never go for being the only one giving us any faith and it is the darker background of it.
What completely overrides the second insignia and the amulet that pivots a dangerous concept that in the wrong hands. Those insignia's could be used detrimentally and it was a demon who brought those marks to the surface as my jaw now tightens my thoughts now rectifying to my brothers past to the fact that crossroads demon put across at point blank range.
That Dean had been visited by a demon to with our own father only knowing about the one that came for me and what I cannot dismiss not only the fact that our mother had to have known about it that my, own brother at some point in his lifetime and long after his infancy. Had to have seen it with the crossroads demons words that Dean was marked in ways that he did not know about.
Being what could only have come from that demon as I now lift my head and no matter how worthless he thinks, he is or how tired of the demon hunting and live we lead to what has been destroying him inwardly to what he can in no way speak to us about. The weight of responsibility that had always been his, the high protector and all that comes with it with Dean also having an entirely different relationship with our father compared to me.
With it not being until our father's death that John addressed his older son in the way he did I only to again hit him hard in another way. One that directly involved us to saving me from those demons to the destiny laid out for me as I wince now to the fact. That same sort of destiny is now marked somehow on Dean with the crossroads demon who I took down.
Her words that one of us would turn to the dark side as my thoughts now disintegrate. Thinking only to my big brother with him always being the one looking out for us protecting us and being the good dependable son something that he had carried since childhood our father forcing him to grow up to fast along with it.
Dean getting no choice in the matter along with the double, edged sword of playing second, fiddle to us with my brother furthermore putting his life on the line more times than anyone else to get us out of trouble and what could only have been there at the back of his mind. Although he has never once voiced it only a shape shifter getting anywhere near close to, addressing it the jealousy hidden underneath, and where it had sprang from to looking out for us and never getting any thanks for it.
With it, being the deeper feelings that he has never been sheltered from it either. Our mother's death only the start our father only making things worse for him and what is there steeped in Dean's soul how inconsequential he must feel in comparison. With it all being hinged on us not him and in another cruel way linked back to our late mother and what I indirectly do not know of my own brothers past.
As I pull on what that crossroads, demon said and it was Lawrence that Dean desperately wanted to return to the two connecting at that and for the one who is always trying to protect me. He has landed us in uncharted waters with what I know could only have been hurting him more than anything my own behavior only adding to it.
That he thinks he may as well have never existed. With the war we have been fighting only been to protect me along with the sickening fact that I am now unable to pay the debt back the other way. That my own hands are now, tied unable to trade my own life for his though I would do it in a heartbeat the injustice of it killing me and what he needs to wake up for.
With him being dead wrong on one thing that the dead tree what those magpies had been on is not so, dead as he thought it was. With there being life there, the magpies gone from it though and he had been more than right on its foreshadowing though to what extent is still at this moment in Dean's own hands s my thoughts fire up to the present.
To the amount of question's I am unable to answer Dean's life combined into the balance along with it and to the unknown reason to why it was now of all times. My brother started having visions plus the fact whether he likes it or not. The plain truth the crossroads demon gave in black and white that he was visited by a different demon in infancy and it is only once every millennia two siblings of the same blood.
Get that kind of fate bestowed on them with that same fate now depending on whether that stubborn full hardy brother of mines is ever going to wake up or not and even with Ellen Bobby and Jo's further help. The last part of the crossroads demons words is not to be, found in any book as my gaze without thinking returns to the Ouija board.
Seeing the little light hitting of it and dawn is not far off as I think now on what else Dean had been trying to tell us with it not only being the visions that had been knocking him off stride that he had recognized Cherokee for some unknown reason too and in his own inflexible way. I had at least managed to decipher that much with him not knowing why either as I now bring, my hand up to my features.
Feeling the weight of responsibility again and the fact I wish our father were alive now. That he would know what to do with this brother of mines being the only family left and he has come too far down this road to run out on us now. As I turn to him the first light of day hitting of the handsome features the scars of old visible to the naked eye the silence maintaining between us.
With the only sound being the equipment his lean, frame even more fragile in the little light as my own hand falls to his anger finding fresh voice:
"Give up if you want to brother but who is going to look after that Impala of yours Dean?"
I look half expecting a retort in response as I now feel a cool breeze the Ouija board flying across the darkened room towards the door landing with a clatter there as I turn back to my brother. With nothing having changed the monitors remaining as they have been as my gaze swings back to the door seeing someone now standing over the Ouija board the door shut behind her as I give her a puzzled look.
The woman answering for us:
"Sam Winchester that's no way to speak to your brother now is it?"
My own mouth open and then closing her response more fitting to what she would have once given Dean and its Missouri Mosey as she speaks again:
"The board moving was not down to Dean Sam.
It was all those other spirits that want to talk first but still your brother has priority in my book even though we cannot reach him yet."
As she now sends us a smile coming closer now and she has aged a little as she now comes round to the other side of the bed her features showing concern as her hand comes to mines:
"When you came to see me before you father was their then and I kept if from both of you but there is something else he also told me."
My brown eyes searching hers as she responds:
"If ever you boys were in real trouble and you needed my help then I was to hunt you down or die trying.
For you were right about one thing Sam your brother's soul is back at that house."
The look hitting of between us as I let go of her hand looking towards Dean as she now helps us:
"The house is empty again Sam has been since the date your father died for it was also when your brother was last in a coma too."
As I now, nod blankly her hand now touching my cheek:
"Dean saved you Sam even after he killed the demon.
Who took away all that ever meant to both of you for its own evil still resides even now and you know that much."
The hand falling away from my cheek at that forcing a reply:
"Missouri none of what your saying is helping Dean and how did you get in here any roads?
For you sure know a heck of a lot more than when we last seen you."
With my own words falling into the deadpan flat mode as she now chuckles as us sending Dean a smile too:
"Well if that is what you call an introduction Sam and I would be right in thinking too that big brother of yours was already wanting home to Lawrence in the first place.
For that's why you ended up here for you had a run in with a demon first and Dean also never gave you a reason to why he wanted to go back home either"
My own brown eyes now seeking refuge in her gaze before sliding back to the silent form:
"It was not the only thing he did not want to talk to us about Missouri."
"Yes Sam and brothers will be brothers."
With her now shifting us a side way's glance:
"His reasons were justified enough but I am afraid you will need to ask him on that one yourself, and it is the whole reason why his soul is back there too.
For it is the only safe place left for him to go without ending up at the gates of hell."
Our eyes now both flicking to Dean pointing now to the tattoo in the inside of the left arm:
"Yeah and you are going to tell us that tattoo has left his soul wide open for any demon to take."
The dark eyes now nudging mines as Missouri replies softly:
"Perhaps but your gift Sam shelters his and it was the same reason you did not know about your father when you were in Lawrence before.
I never thought about it either only it is hidden, so deep in your brother that he did not even know himself."
Her gaze switching back to Dean as she speaks again:
"The forces are gathered against you boys and his gift, is far more fragile than yours Sam but this world needs you both.
The only problem is that brother of yours does not think so for he seems to have a death wish and a half even for a Winchester."
As I now, smile at her:
"He would have something to say to that Missouri, but he cannot hear you which, is, a good thing to and you have not answered my first question either?"
"Sam that's only for my knowing and you both got a purpose to live up to it is why you both have the gift child."
The answer startling us as she now beckons to me to hand over Dean's amulet something that I quickly oblige to as she cartwheels us even further:
"Your name comes from the bible Sam and so does Dean's plus you know the meaning of his in Latin?"
As I nod unsure of where she is going with this:
"It means chief of ten and it was what the demon used why?"
"Sam out with your brother being named after the rat pack too there is another meaning in his name the old English abbreviation."
Her eyes now meeting mines as I speak:
"What is it Missouri?"
"It means valley and when you looked into this amulets history you like your brother went down the same route.
The right one too but its part Egyptian first and though the bible mentions the valley of the shadow of death there is another famous valley used to this day in Egypt."
As I now look from Missouri back to Dean who, still remains out of it as I hedge my, own bets:
"You are talking about the Valley of the Kings and the amulet comes from a sun god it is no co-incidence it fell into my brothers hands is their?"
Her hand now returning to mines:
"No Sam and years before on his fourteenth birthday it was I who gave him it to ward off the demon who, came specifically for him."
As the image before me now changes Missouri no longer standing their but our own mother as I fall back hitting the chair wondering at the same time how Dean can remain completely oblivious to everything as I find my voice:
"Mum"
Her smile lighting up in the same way Dean's often does as she looks from me too her other son and then back to me:
"Your dad says hi Sam and on the first night that demon came for your brother I made the choice not to tell your father."
Her eyes now finding mines and resting their love shining there for both of us with my own thoughts hinging on what this unconscious form beside us would say:
"What about Dean Mum did you not think he had the right to know too?"
Our gaze staying put as she now reaches out slowly touching my own features:
"He stopped it then Sammy and he was only six months old plus it was the only sure way to protect him."
Her gaze now shifting to Dean as she speaks again as though to us both:
"Your father done everything he could to make sure you were safe and protected Sam but he also inadvertently ended up shielding Dean to by turning him into a warrior."
As I now without thinking move away from her, touch:
"That is not everything though is it?
And we lost you mum yet you knew even then what was coming to our whole family but you did nothing to stop it and dad and Jess died for it too."
My own words stopping at that as she now hushes us with one look:
"Long before I met your father I lost a brother too Sam.
His name was Dean he was my parents first born and he never lived beyond six months old."
Her gaze transcending mines as she looks to her eldest son:
"He was born in Cherokee before our parents moved to Lawrence it is where his grave is and why your brother recognized Cherokee.
I took him to see it once when he was three years old Sammy."
The words halting their as she looks back this way:
"Your father wanted a good strong name for his first born son and indirectly that's where it came from plus from the first moment we laid eyes on him.
That brother of yours could be nothing else but Dean."
The beautiful features turning to somber again as she slowly, retakes my, own hand:
"I always knew your purpose Sam of what you could do and if your father had known about his eldest son you might never have come along."
Her words pausing their breaking in at that point with my own words:
"Don't even try to pin the blame on your oldest son who is dying mum.
For you are beginning, to sound a hell, of a lot like dad if you have not noticed."
As my own thoughts turn only to him:
"He is an innocent in all this and he is paying for it with his life so is this how you for scene him dying?"
The words overly hard my touch leaving hers her eye going only to Dean as I see the sadness hidden in those depths:
"Sam were, it not for the protection of that amulet your brother would have perished long ago."
Our gaze crossing emotionally at the gist of what she is now saying as I look slowly to Dean, whose eyes are still defiantly, closed to this world his unconscious form unwilling to register who is here now.
As I now, reply off handily for him:
"The crossroad demon told me hell would be brought forth if he dies and you knew your son's fate too.
Yet you are more than willing to let Dean die for it mum."
With my own further comment, being cut off at that her tone subsiding quickly emotion breaking free as I look again to my brother. Taking in the words along with it the delicate gravity that goes with them tail looping it also to the mark in his inside left arm and the colt gun. My breath staggering to the further deeper infliction that Dean carries with him with what he had somehow managed to scorch deep into the ground at Cherokee.
Being only the first real hint of his gift and what makes him all the more unique for that same, reason as my own thoughts tumble inwards in unraveling angst. Watching the woman before me now a mother desperately reaching out to her son as she gently touches his features smoothing the brown short hair back at his temple her hand now linking slowly with his lifeless one the amulet safely linked in the closed palms:
"Whether you win or lose this war he'll die before its end Sam."
The issue now cutting back onto my own turf reeling now on her other earlier words along with the more robust reason our father married her:
"If we were chosen as warriors and Dean is meant to die before this fight is over then it means he was only meant to live now.
For it is not over by a long chalk and it is more importantly what dad would have wanted for both of us."
As her hand now respectively in answer slowly disengaging from her eldest son the individual who is ironically the non-believer of the family the light hitting of the amulet onto my own features:
"You take too much after John Sammy and where did you think your brother's fear of flying came from?"
My glance now turning to one of pure frustration and she is trying to change the subject in the way her oldest son takes after as our eyes once more meet:
"Dean won't turn against me and no matter how much of a gift he has I am not going to let it kill him either."
Her gaze giving way as I see the tears in her eyes and how much her first born, means to her:
"Even with you looking out for him Sam and the protection of that inner tattoo plus the amulet he's marked by a demon who knew his purpose as well as I."
As I now reach, out to her the hand linking through mines as she turns to study every detail of Dean's sensitive features:
"Missouri like your father wanted to see him with her own eye and she always had a soft spot for that goofy kid Sam."
With our eyes now meeting in complete love and understanding my anger disappearing with it as she lightly touches my shoulder whispering something else into my own ear the last dimensions of what I had not known beginning to make sense at last.
My brown eyes falling back emotionally to Dean seeing the last life ebbing there finding my own voice again:
"It was you he called out for mum and if he knew the truth he'd never take it would he?"
The answer to my, own question being in the words as I sense her beginning to withdraw her touch returning to her oldest son love shining their looking now between them seeing the intimacy of a mother returning to a land once known. With the remainder of what she has, left unsaid telling the rest of what she has given of herself so as we might both live.
To our father who helped turn us into the men and warriors we both have become and would have understood this exchange of lives for his eldest son. Missouri binding it along with it lying in a coma state in Kansas City hospital and has done for seven days with her willing giving her life for Dean as my thoughts change projector to Layla.
The woman alive now thanks solely to that brother's of mines and what I do not need told his life is yet in the hands of the gods his fate bidden to death yet as the responsibility that is now mines increases. The amulet falling back into my hand at that moment as my hand tightens its grip on it knowing too the vast power, of that outer star on Dean's arm combined as our mother now touches my own hand.
The tenderness of her gaze overwhelming us along with the fact she is leaving us both again with it being Dean her thoughts are with as she gently retouches the brown hair the hand moving along the jaw line as her tears now crystallize kissing his forehead in that same moment. The love growing in her own eye her words now reaching out to him in only the way a mother can as I smile at her and I know what she has just said to him.
As her gaze swings back this way the look alone telling us, something else is far wrong and what it can only be connected to the crossroads demon as I reach out to her and it is to late her image vanishing speaking now into the silence:
"Mum"
With their being no answer to my, own call. As the dawn red light gradually increases in magnitude as I look first to Dean and then the floor aware it has been no dream either as I gaze at the Ouija board that lies way across the room my head slowly turning back and he is still completely well out of it his unconscious form unwavering.
As I look to what is keeping him alive and nothing yet has signaled any change. As I turn to him feeling fresh re-awakened anger and his vitals are only remaining static as I give the ashen features a skeptical, glance and hell is not getting it hands on him yet as I now gently without thinking put the amulet in his right palm my own hand staying put.
Seeing the pulse again at his wrist as I now draw myself, together thinking about both our parents and not even our own mother has been enough to bring him round although a different soul. Has already now given her life for him our mother completing that bind and stubbornly. He is still as of yet at deaths door feeling now as in answer to my own thoughts the first slightest flicker of life under my own palm.
The amulet linked between us as I give an uncertain glance my own emotions finding voice:
"Dean"
With the thumb now giving a definitive twitch as I feel the palm add slight pressure before relaxing again as my brown eyes now, move back to the equipment that has remained more or less dormant throughout these seven days now going ballistic as the heart monitor screams into life. My gaze turning back to my big brother with the eyes remaining closed and unlike the last time, he is not waking up suddenly.
As I hear someone else approach from behind me the doctor who was certain he was going to die along with two of the more than swell looking nurses as he now breaks the distance checking my brother over slowly as he now opens the eyelids letting them close again as he looks to me:
"Keep talking to him son."
As I now oblige not forgetting its Dean's twenty-ninth birthday as I now remind him of that fact the heart rate monitor now petering back thankfully to a more than steady but sure rhythm the hand giving a reassuring move in answer to my own words.
My gaze staying on him the eyes still closed to me as the doctor touches my shoulder aware of what I am going, through and the fact it is getting somewhere:
"Bring him home Sam"
With those words having more than one unwitting pun in them as I now release my grip gently closing Dean's own right hand over the amulet that is his alone speaking to him at the same time:
"That is yours brother and are you intending on sleeping in on your own birthday Dean?"
The dawn light now reaching its maximum as I draw away knowing his soul is already safely back with us as I watch with relief seeing the hazel eyes at last blink open before closing again for a second as they now slowly begin to focus. Disorientation clearly visible in them as he now looks around him his gaze resting briefly this way the eyes a darker shade than normal.
With there being a glazed shadowed light in them as I pick, up on what else is there the look of all out cataclysmic fear and what even at this moment I realize. That there is not, the faintest hint of recognition there as the hazel pools again focus this way the doctor now speaking to him as I see the head move a little.
The handsome white features giving a puzzled uncertain frown the look in the hazel eyes doing the rest as I shift uncomfortably under that same gaze the pools desolate and haunted looking as he continues to look this way. The nurses now managing to catch his eye as the doctor continues to run his checks the doctor now sending me a glance that tells me everything is not as it should be as I gingerly take a step closer.
Coming completely into my own big brothers view Dean shifting a further wary glare and what I cannot shake that I am a complete stranger to him as the hazel eyes now flare in unknown recognition of who I am that feeling now compounded. As I hear his voice for the first time weak though it is with the sound alone been rewarding enough as I try not to let the words get to me too much and the fact he is alive and breathing for himself.
With the life coming back of its own accord and more importantly, he is here with only a little help from the powers, that be as the doctor now lets me to talk to him. The eyes shifting me a further glare that I ignore as the feeling in the pit of my stomach cranks up a notch the doctor now halting my own further action.
As I see, the fear and confusion grow in the look I am, given as I hear the doctor's words to me that it is to be, expected especially from an individual who has pulled through a coma twice those facts not helping any as the doctor now reiterates the point. Pulling us further out of ear, shot of my brother and it is not something to heal overnight the damage taking if not months but years to fix and the fact he might never remember.
The hazel eyes now coming to mines as though he has overheard us talking about him my own euphoria sinking with it as my brother's, gaze swings from the nurse with there being nothing wrong there anyway. His set features now giving the tattoo on his left arm an odd look and to what is still in his other hand the amulet as I now watch him trying, to make sense of it.
The amulet now getting tossed to the side with it not meaning anything to him as I hear the doctor speaking again solely to me that he has to stay in for observation for at least another two days with that being the least of it. As I consider the question that Dean had asked the doctor the one that he should have been able to answer for himself as I return to where I have been for the last seven days.
The doctor letting us do so the nurses leaving m, brothers gaze behind as he turns back re-asking his earlier question this time to me:
"Where are my parents?"
With the tone, giving the underlying emotion the gaze not staying put for long with it now wandering aimlessly round the room as I answer him feeling an unknown responsibility with it:
"They are both dead Dean."
The head jerking up in emotional pain at that statement as I now answer his next question for him:
"Our mother died in a fire when you were four, brother I was only six months old then and dad passed about a year and half ago."
As I see him now look at me not wanting to belief us either as the hazel eyes remain a disjointed blank the look one of complete innocence and I am only inflicting further pain on him with what he cannot seem to remember.
Being the very foundations of his life and blood as he looks now from the doctor who is still here to us:
"So you must be Sam then and you're my baby bother?"
With the hazel eyes, giving incredulity at that as well and under any other circumstances his reactions would be comical but from here, it is a million miles from it as I now simply nod flinching despite my-self at the tone used as I find something else to say to him:
"You sometimes call me Sammy Dean like mum did."
The shoulders now giving a distant shrug his gaze wandering to the first available female nurse who can been seen in the corridor as I now deliberately cut his view aware that I am now the one looking out for him and the responsibility only starts there.
His gaze now giving a more than mad look as I turn the tables on him:
"You don't remember me Dean?"
With the answer coming quickly enough his, gaze going past us:
"No Sam."
The hazel eyes now completely ignoring us as I take the seat next to him aware that I have a mountain the size of Everest to climb here his temperament and larger than life personality not helping any although both are thankfully, wholly intact. My thoughts now expanding back to the crossroad demons words that my brother was dead either way and he would be lost to us.
With what our mother had also mentioned of him turning against us not being this that she had been meaning as I give him a look one he is quick enough to pick-up on and he is unable to read what I am thinking as he now back stabs us painfully:
"You got something else to say Sam?"
The tone forcing a wince from me with the look in the vulnerable hazel eyes doing even more damage. As the lifeless gaze moves back of me and even though he cannot remember those visions are going to start happening again with how to handle him taking on a whole, new sphere with also keeping him in the dark to most of it.
Being about the only thing, I can do at this moment and what goes with it that he is even more vulnerable and innocent to the evil that can now claim him as I give a low heartfelt sigh instead of answering him. Knowing too who all this will mean most to and its Lawrence I need to get him back to with that house where he spent the first four years of his life being the only place left that I might yet be able to reach him.
My own brown eyes returning to focus on the individual beside us with the brother who has repeatedly put his life on the line for us no longer being in there. The handsome features hitting me again with a look Dean's hazel eyes now penetrating mines and I am a complete stranger to him. As I see the tiredness returning there along with the fact, he is still weak from the coma with the supernatural elements.
What helped bring him back along with the life as warriors what our father taught us being something I am going to need to break to him gently with how he is going to take it being pretty immeasurable. As I draw on my faith and courage aware that the brother the one I would in a second give my own life for is still in there somewhere and I am not about to give up on him.
With what has been let loose in this last week along with everything else getting, sent back to where it belongs by both of us and we have a purpose to fulfill one that needs Dean Winchester lock, stock, and barrel with that gift what we now both share. Being the only, other unlikely alternative way left to reach him.
As the hazel eyes now send me, an uncertain glance of distrust and pain as I swallow hard aware of my lesser years and what I can never tell him the responsibility that is now mines alone and of the demon who wants his very soul for its own purpose….
TO BE CONTINUED
